Wednesday, 3 March 2010

Paddies Give Israel the Big Finger

Once again, the latest and the greatest from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.

Irish Foreign Minister Mick ‘Spud’ Martin has severely castigated an Eire town council's unanimous decision to rip out a page signed by the Israeli ambassador from its VIP guestbook.

Whacky Bogford representatives voted to remove the signature of Sheldon Weaselstein – the Israeli Ambassador - in protest over his country’s appalling diplomatic record concerning illegal invasions, war crimes against the marginalised population of Gaza and using forged Irish passports to facilitate the assassination of political opponents in Dubai – then blaming it on a bunch of Paddy pikeys.

The main topic of protest at a recent council meeting held in the saloon bar of The Turnip Chucker’s Arms concerned the Zionist state oppressing the rightful owners of the country by building the Great Wall of Israel – a thirty-foot high apartheid barrier around Gaza imprisoning the Muslim Palestinian population – to facilitate the IDF’s genocidal ethnic cleansing programme of extermination via the vehicles of starvation, sickness – and their preferred ‘shooting fish in a barrel’ method of conducting warfare.

A man with a big brown dog, known only as Murphy the Goat, told Moses Scumberg, a correspondent for the Shylocks Gazette that “This new Nakba Draft Law you’ve just passed in your nutty Knesset makes it a crime for the Palestinians to commemorate the “Nakba” - the “catastrophe” of their dispossession that you scumbags caused when you created your illegitimate Zionist state in 1948.”

“All you bastards are doing is carrying out pogroms against the true owners of the Holy Land – the Palestinians – with the Nazification of Gaza and the West Bank - and now the Al Aqsa Mosque in Jerusalem. You’re turning Gaza into another Auschwitz.”

“It all comes down to your so-called forged Protocols of Zion and this culture of hatred for the goyim. Do you really think you’re going to actually rule the world just because your Torah says so? Nile to Euphrates - and beyond – my ass!”

“This Third World War you and your Zionist yid mates in the US are currently fomenting is going to turn sour and bite you all square in the butt. Just dare to attack Iran and you’ll unleash all the demons in Pandora’s box.”

Conversely Foreign Minister Martin spit the dummy with the Whacky Bogford council and residents declaring that diplomatic representatives should always be treated with respect – even if they are war-mongering criminal scumbags.

However Murphy the Goat and other local officials attending the saloon bar meeting defended the town's decision, stating they hoped it would send a serious message to Israel concerning the empathy felt for the Palestinians by the people of Eire.

"We think if a government is responsible for a wholesale disregard for international law then local authorities, as well as our own government, have a responsibility to tell them we expect a higher standard if they expect us to keep buying their poxy Jaffa oranges.”

As the council retired to the pub’s dining room to tuck into a traditional Irish mixed grill - of boiled taters, roast taters, mashed taters and chips – Murphy concluded “It’s about time these Israeli gits took a long look in the mirror because we’re sick and tired of their usual ‘We’re special – we’re God’s Chosen People” – mantra.”

“But they go off the deep end with their offended kike sensibilities and customary hard-faced brazen hubris - denying any wrongdoing and automatically play their eternal ‘victims’ card and label critics like the good folks of Whacky Bogford – and all and sundry who don’t tow the Jewish / Zionist line– as anti-Semites and Holohoax deniers.”

This political stand and inherent message to Israel sent by the town council has subsequently led to the cancellation of the scheduled Whacky Bogford appearance of the touring ‘Kike Rap’ rock group - Seymour and the Shylocks.

* Carbon Credit Cap & Trade Exchange declaration: No Palestinian civilians or Muslims in general were harmed during the posting of this message. However, a large number of Zionist types were totally pissed off.

Allergy warning : This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and / or squirrel.

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