Friday, 7 May 2010

Broon Proud of Labour’s Record – Que?

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Upon hearing the announcement that the General Election vote count had resulted in a ‘hung Parliament’ - and ignoring the voluminous applause and cries of response that “They all should be!” - Gordon ‘Absolutely No Mates’ Broon – despite losing the general election and confidence of the majority of British voters, claims he is content with New Labour’s thirteen year record of abysmal failures, citing: "I'm proud of much that the Labour government has achieved: the conquest of Iraq, the unfathomable child tax credit system, the NHS sell-off, more EUSSR immigrants joining our workforce, half a million children taken into care – and two million more jobs than in 1997.”

Yeah, right – tell that last bit to the two and a half million people down the job centre looking for work. Que – is this man really suffering from medium-term memory loss? Proud? – Of what exactly?

Dragging Britain into two illegal wars after forging dodgy ‘weapons of mass distraction’ dossiers?
The ‘assisted suicide’ of Dr David Kelly in Grassy Knoll Woods?
The shut down of Operation Ore and the concealment of the names of the 7,250 paedophiles identified – with a legion of those roosting around and in the seats of government?
MI5’s involvement in the 7/7 London tube train bombings?
The continued black propaganda demonisation of Islam and British Muslims?
Breaking more promises than enough – the biggest being our referendum on EUSSR membership?
Permitting trans-migration into the UK from Third World status EUSSR nations so immigrants can steal British jobs from under the noses of British workers?
Encouraging mass Third World immigration to engineer a multicultural society, with a tied in aim of undermining the base of the Conservative Party?
Allowing unregulated banksters to cause a recession?
Permitting Israeli Zionist lobbyists to influence British foreign policy?
To lose all moral station by ignoring the plight of the Palestinian people being oppressed under the neo-Nazi Israeli jackboot?
Allowing the unregulated MP expenses system to produce a major scandal?
The Millennium Dome cock up?
Numerous ‘Whitewash and Coverup’ inquiries – starting with Princess Diana’s assassination in 1997?
Sneezy Pig flu hoax and pushing toxic vaccines?
The Foo& Mouth epidemic spread and gross mishandling?
The installation of more speed cameras and CCTV snooper systems than leaves on the trees?
The total closure of the British steel industry and sell-off to Monty Mittal’s Flying Circus (Bombay)?
Pushing the ‘global warming’ carbon credits cap and trade exchange scam to tax us all into poverty?
Repeatedly recycling the same scandal-ridden cabinet ministers of the ilk of the ginger minging Blears, Blindgit, Mandelson, Vaz (the Hindujas) etc, inter alia?
The 2010 pre-election Cash for Influences scandal in which undercover posed as political lobbyists and offered to pay members of Parliament to influence policy – a bait just too juicy to resist?

Oh fuck it – let’s have a complete-ish chronological listing just under Tony Bliar:

April 2006 Cameron MacIntosh offered Peerage for loan
April 2006 Peter Law’s 'peerage'
April 2006 Charles Clarke & the failed deportations
April 2006 John Prescott's Affair(s)
April 2006 Cherie Blair’s hairdressing bill
April 2006 - Jack McConnell under pressure over breaking the ministerial code of conduct by giving public backing to a luxury golf resort planned by Donald Trump which could prejudice the planning process for the development
April 2006 - Revealed that Jack McConnell met with furniture tycoon Robert Morris over compensation to relocate his factory on the route of the M74 extension. The £35million was more than double the original compensation offer
March 2006 - Defeated Labour MP Calum MacDonald gets publicly paid job as Forestry Commissioner
March 2006 Tessa Jowell & husband David Mills / Silver-tongued Berlusconi scandal
March 2006 Peerages for Cash
March 2006 Two-Shags Prescott pays no Council tax
March 2006 Margaret Beckett’s Royal Flights
February 2006 Ken Livingstone loses Standards Board appeal over anti-Jewish remarks
October 2005 David Blingit resigns over links to DNA firm and kicks Sadie in arse
October 2005 Slack-jawed Cherie Gets £100,000 for “charity” speaking tour
October 2005 Stephen Byers apologies for lying over Rattle-Track contracts
September 2005 Michael Watson MSP blamed for arson
August 2005 - Revealed that disgraced former Scottish Executive special adviser, Phil Chalmers, is heading up a bid by French IT firm Atos Origin to secure some of the ID card contracts
July 2005 - Defeated Labour MP David Stewart gets job with the publicly funded SCVO only two months after losing his seat
June 2005 Cherie Opens Shopping centre for Malaysian millionaire – for a huge fee
June 2005 Labour MSP Ken MacIntosh resigns over non declaration of financial interests
June 2005 Cherie Blair cashes in on Tony’s Washington trip
May 2005 Birmingham Labour Party accused over post voting irregularities
April 2005 - Brian Wilson MP's final section on Register of Members' Interests shows directorships and advisory roles to renewable energy firms. As Energy Minister he promoted renewable energy
April 2005 - Revealed that Jack McConnell met with Labour donor Willie Haughey to discuss compensation on a land deal where the M74 would pass through Haughey's property. Initial compensation of £7.4 million rose to £16.5 million
March 2005 Labour charges £200 for candidate contact details
February 2005 Cherie Blair embarks on lucrative Australian speaking tour
January 2005 Candy Atherton’s researcher digs for gay Tory dirt
January 2005 - Jack McConnell fails to register a holiday at the Spanish villa of BBC broadcaster Kirsty Wark
January 2005 - Sarah Davidson, once an adviser to former Scottish secretary Helen Liddell, lands a £75,000-a-year job enforcing McConnell’s smoking ban. The new job was never advertised. She was the civil servant who presided over a £200m rise in the cost of Holyrood before taking a six-month sabbatical to travel round the world
December 2004 Oona King offered £10000 to bed Labour Euro MP
October 2004 - Revealed that 70% of Scottish quango appointees have links to the Labour party August 2004 August 2004 - Former Edinburgh Labour Provost Eric Milligan appointed Scotland’s “welcome Tsar” to the tourism industry. Although not paid a salary he receives expenses to travel the world
June 2004 - Willie Haughey, who has donated hundreds of thousands of pounds to the Labour party, appointed to the post of chairman of Scottish Enterprise Glasgow.
May 2004 Lord Drayson’s company wins non competitive tender contract after £50,000 donation to Labour
May 2004 - Failed Labour candidate Hugh Raven, a former parliamentary assistant to Peter Peacock, the education minister, awarded a £23,415 contract as a board member of Scottish Natural Heritage
April 2004 Beverley Hughes resigns over Immigration scandal
February 2004 Labour criticised by Electoral Commission for late tendering of accounts
January 2004 - Revealed that Schlumberger hired disgraced special adviser Philip Chalmers to run the Scottish Tourist Board’s Visit Scotland website. The website is part of a Scottish Executive PFI contract
November 2003 Margaret Hodge forced to resign over libelling Demetrious Panton
September 2003 - Harry McGuigan, a leading Lanarkshire Labour councillor appointed as a member of the Scottish Children’s Reporter Administration board
August 2003 David Kelly commits suicide – with assistance from MI5 thugs and Mossad
August 2003 Chris Bryant pictured in briefs on Gaydar website
August 2003 - Defeated Labour MSP Iain Gray appointed as Alistair Darling's special adviser at a salary of £60,000
August 2003 - Failed Labour candidate Pat Kelly appointed to board of Scottish Water.
March 2003 Clive Betts MP employed rent boy in House of Commons office
March 2003 Ron Davies goes badger watching – again!?
December 2002 Cherie Blair apologises over links to conman Peter Foster
October 2002 - Lanarkshire Labour party hold a Red Rose Dinner attended by a notorious drug baron called Justin McAlroy
October 2002 - Forty-four corrupt constituency Labour parties in Scotland revealed to have failed to register agreements to accept regular donations from trades unions. Failure to do so is a criminal offence
September 2002 Labour MP Alan Meale in trouble over deportation case linked to donation
July 2002 Carphone Warehouse chairman claims Lord Levy tried to nobble a £1 million donation
June 2002 Ken Livingstone accused of manhandling his partner while drunk at a party
June 2002 Black Rod accuses Downing Street of trying to muscle in on Queen Mother's funeral
June 2002 Labour spin doctors accuse Paddington crash victim Pam Warren of being a Tory stooge
May 2002 Stephen Byers resigns from government after various scandals
May 2002 Tessa Jowell criticises Labour for accepting donation from Richard Desmond
March 2002 Lakshmi Mittal scandal
March 2002 Donnygate Doncaster Labour scandal ends in prison for Labour councillors
February 2002 Arthur Andersen & donations to Labour
February 2002 Martin Sixsmith forced to resign by Stephen Byers
February 2002 Jo Moore resigns over ‘burying bad news’ email
January 2002 - Norman Murray, Labour councillor and former convenor of the Convention of Scottish Local Authorities, appointed board member of the Scottish Ambulance Service at £7,305 a year
January 2002 Labour spin doctors trash reputation of Rose Addis
January 2002 Enron accused of buying access to Labour after donation
December 2001 Keith Vaz criticised by Standards Commissioner over business links
December 2001 Nigel Griffiths and £40,000 office expenses
November 2001 Henry McLeish resigns as Scottish First Minister after office expense scandal
November 2001 November 2001 - Jack McConnell admits to affair with Labour party secretary who he tried to keep in situ by appealing to Labour MPs for funds. He says he has had no other affairs
July 2001 Hindujahs receive passports after Labour donation
May 2001 May 2001 - Robin Young, a former non-executive director of Bovis (construction managers of the Scottish Parliament) appointed as permanent secretary at the Department of Trade and Industry
April 2001 - Failed Labour candidate Keith Geddes appointed to board of Scottish Natural Heritage
January 2001 Buyer of Millennium Dome Robert Bourne accused over donation to Labour
January 2001 Peter Mandelson resigns for the second time
November 2000 Cherie Blair & Nannygate
July 2000 David Blunkett fails to declare income from rent on his Wimbledon home
June 2000 Geoffrey Robinson in trouble with Belgian tax authorities
June 2000 Lord Ali in trouble for using House of Lords as business address
April 2000 John Prescott fails to disclose benefit of Union owned flat
January 2000 Geoffrey Robinson faces fraud inquiry over Transtec
January 2000 Gordon Brown faces Inquiry over flat purchased from Maxwell ruins
January 2000 January 2000 - Police arrest Philip Chalmers, who earned £50,000-a-year as head of the Scottish Executive’s strategic communications unit, for being drunk at the wheel of his car in a red light district with a prostitute
October 1999 Ron Davies goes badger watching
October 1999 - Failed Labour candidate Joan Aitken appointed as the Prisons Complaints Commissioner
September 1999 Scottish Labour Party lobbying scandal
July 1999 Ken Collins, former Labour MEP, appointed chairman of the Scottish Environment Protection Agency with a salary of £45,000
December 1998 Geoffrey Robinson resigns over loaning money to Peter Scandalson
December 1998 Peter Scandalson resigns over Geoffrey Robinson loan
November 1998 Nick Brown admits paying for gay sex
October 1998 Ron Davies’s Moment of Madness on Clapham Common
July 1998 Downing Street adviser Roger Liddle investigatedover lobbying links
March 1998 Lord Irvine’s £650,000 of wallpaper
March 1998 Scottish Parliament building tendering process & construction
July 1999 Derek Draper & Lobbygate
August 1998 Robin Cook’s affair with Gaynor Regan exposed
November 1997 Bernie Eccleston’s £1 million donation investigated
May 1997 Mohammed Sarwar accused of bribery
Each year Blair's freebie holidays

Yet this lying porridge wog git Gordon ‘No Mates’ Broon claims he wants what’s best for the British people.
Hmmm, a lot of question marks there for you and the ‘New Losers’ party, Gordon.

* Carbon Credit Cap & Trade Exchange (aka Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: No polling station officials, political party candidates, trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees or small furry mammals were harmed in posting this message. However, it will be noted that a large number of New Labour MP’s are now out of a job.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies and mis-spoken references.

Oh, and by the way, fuck Big Brother – and his sister – and the New World Order.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views – Purveyors of Bespoke Satire – enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of political incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist lobby.

New Losers Party chronological scandal sheet courtesy of :

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