UK Banksters Labelled Usury Freaks

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Britain's banks are "ripping off" their customers, Business Secretary Vince Cobble opined during an interview with Channel 69’s ‘Scumbags Review’ programme earlier this week.

Cobble stated for the record that forcing banks to change their practices would be a key test of the Libservative coalition government’s determination for positive change to the financial system - in wresting control of the country and the economy out of the greedy grasping clutches of the Rothshite Zionist crime family consortium and their associated banksters and shifty Shylocks.

Hmmm, so there’s one the previous Business Secretary, Lord Peter ‘Vermin in Ermine’ Scandalson never bothered to comment on – that the kikesters were ripping us all off – as if we were too thick (or moneyed) to notice. Well, let’s be honest, Scandy is the guy who evolved dishonesty into an art form.

Cobble’s comments, which are obviously going to make him as popular in the City as a leper with the flu, come as research for the ‘Scumbags Review’ reveals that high street banks surveyed are charging as much as 167% interest on unauthorised overdrafts – with actual authorised overdrafts charging an average of 32% interest, despite advertised rates of around 19%.

In response to the findings Cobble told hacks from the gutter press "When we talk about restructuring the banks what's going to come out of this is a more competitive system where the customers are not ripped off as badly. What we have today is paying the price for a lack of healthy competition in a banking marketplace dominated by a few big kikester players whose primary cultural activity has forever been extracting interest from counterfeit money – plus their obsession with ridiculously exorbitant bonuses which continues to be immoral and wholly unacceptable.”

“Just look at the ex-Royal Bank of Scumland boss Fred Greedberg. His incompetence caused the collapse of the bank and prompted a government bail-out – then he took early retirement and walked away with a £703,000-a-year package - including a £2.7 million lump sum - despite leading the bank to the brink of disaster.”
“Really, the modus operandi of these capitalist parasites reflects their lack of moral compass and they require bringing to heel. What we need is Jesus to cast them out of the temple.”

Candida Titwank, head of financial planning at SG Scumbros Bank which examined the true cost of overdrafts, urged consumers to read the fine print on their account details – which is normally located on a flyer you threw away and written in Sanskrit - font 2 grey – with English versions on request from the bank’s Delhi call centre. Just ring 0845 666 666 and ask for Rashid.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies and misaligned references.