Clinton Lectures Russia on ‘Fair Play’

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

In one of her customary arrogant displays of opening mouth before engaging brain, the US Secretary of Sleaze, Hilarious Rodent Clinton this week demonstrated yet again the fact she is totally ignorant of the meaning of the word ‘hypocrisy’ when she lambasted the Russian government for establishing and maintaining military bases in Georgia's breakaway regions of South Tosspottia and Krappistan.

At a joint press conference with the cross-dressing South Tosspottian President Achmed Shagasheep in Tbilisi on Monday – to whom the Rodent personally handed a thick brown envelope and described as “My sort of Muslim” - she urged Moscow to abide by her stern warning and end its military presence in the country – or else.

"We continue to call for Russia to abide by the August 2008 ceasefire commitment by ending the occupation and withdrawing Russian troops from South Tosspottia and Krappistan to their pre-conflict positions," the Rodent informed Sapphie Dildodo, the female correspondent from the Rugmunchers Gazette, adding "The United States of Israel is steadfast in its commitment to Georgia's sovereignty and territorial integrity – so the Russians need to get the hell out of here to make room for our new bases.”

Georgia was the final stop of Clinton's five-day tour of the region to secure fresh agreements for more air bases to facilitate the weekly shipment of body bags into Afghanistan and the forecast increase in the repatriation of dead US troops from the Sanglin area of Bellend Province to Dover Airbase in Delaware for burial – along with shedloads of prime Afghan opium for processing into street cut heroin to finance the US intelligence (sic) community’s ‘black op’s budgets’.

Conversely, global political analysts have been quick to point out that Moscow views many of the Rodent's recent remarks as meddling in the affairs of a region Russia still considers its own ‘doorstep’ – while posturing the US as the ‘good guy’ and wholly ignoring their hypocrisy in kick-starting illegal false flag wars simply to provide excuses to invade Afghanistan and Iraq to further the aims of their avaricious kikester-run military-industrial corporations who thrive on the profits of conflict – both foreign and domestic.

The Rodent did close her diatribe with a veiled threat that “Once General Petraeus is finished sorting out the Taliban insurgency he might just set his sights on bringing our brand of American democracy to South Tosspottia and end up kicking some Russkie ass in the process.”

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies and misaligned references.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views – Purveyors of Bespoke Satire – enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of political incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist lobby.