Tuesday 20 April 2010

Israeli Tourist Board Bent on Empire

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the sons of Belial.

Britain has this week banned an Israeli Tourist Board press campaign from being shown in the UK in which pictures of the Palestinian Noble Sanctuary and the al-Aqsa Mosque in Jerusalem, along with Egypt’s Giza Pyramids, Istanbul’s Golden Gate, Iran’s Dizin ski resort in the Alborz Mountains and Syria’s Palmyra ruins have all been blatantly displayed as part of the all-new ‘Greater Israel’.

The UK’s Empire Builders Gazette reported on Wednesday that the British advertising regulator imposed a ban on the promo’ over display of the sites, both the former of which are in East Jerusalem (al-Quds) and part of the Palestinian occupied territories – with the remainder being located in the sovereign territories of other Mid-Eastern nations.

The Advertising Standards Authority claims that readers of the adverts might well assume all the places featured in the not-so-kosher brochure were part of Israel.

ASA spokeswoman Chlamydia Mingerot informed Fux News "While the status of the occupied territory of the West Bank is the subject of much international dispute and lies before the aegis of the UN for eventual resolution, it is an obvious display of disgusting brazen hubris that prompts the Israeli Tourist Board to advertise the resorts and sight-seeing attractions of neighbouring countries as being within their own national boundaries – regardless of their Zionist New World Order plans for expansion and conquest.

In 2009 an earlier tourism campaign depicting the areas of the West Bank, Gaza Strip and Golan Heights as part of Israel was banned by the advertising watchdog following hundreds of complaints – mainly from the goyim residents of the West Bank, the Gaza Strip and Golan Heights.

Israel occupied East Jerusalem (al-Quds) during one of their customary bullying acts of aggression against their Palestinian neighbours in 1967 and later annexed it. The status of the city is among the thorniest issues of the so-called peace process with the Palestinians underscoring the reality that any Palestinian state should include the city as its rightful historic capital.

Conversely Israeli Tourism Minister Shakran Rashaim informed a reporter from the Warmongers Review “Bollocks to Muslim sentiments and feelings. It is so written in our holy Torah – in Jehovah’s own words - that we shall rule a Greater Israel – from Nile to Euphrates – and far beyond - as exampled by we Jews ruling the United States."
"So our tourism brochures are all ready for when we invade Iran and anyone else who stands against us and defies the edicts of the Protocols of Zion.”

Do you live in an area that’s been earmarked in a Kikester tourist kosher brochure? Have you been affected by the IDF occupying your garden shed? Does your property insurance cover you for ‘Hostile Invasion by a Foreign Army’?

Send your comments using the online reply form below and you could win a nice little shaded piece of property up against Israel’s Great Apartheid Wall – on the grotty Gaza side – resplendent with its own pile of depleted uranium contaminated ‘glow-in-the-dark’ rubble.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies and mis-spoken references.

Thought for the day: If the Pope takes his big hat off and wears a yarmulke, does that mean he’s Jewish?

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