Friday, 23 September 2011

WickedLeaks Boss Sues Publisher

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

US-Israeli mind slave muppet and WickedLeaks maestro Julian Blancmange, brainwashed via the medium of neuro-linguistic programming under the MK-Ultra programme in Australia as a sprog, has gone into ‘moron mode’ and instructed lawyers to commence proceedings to sue the publishing giant Scandalgate for releasing drafts of his dodgy autobiographical ‘memoir’ after he spent his advance on rub and tug ‘happy ending’ massages and lap dancing whores that suck n swallow and go bareback.

Blancmange, a former Antipodean albino impersonator, has accused the prestigious UK publisher of a breach of contract for releasing drafts of his uncompleted autobiography without approval.
However, Genghis McTadger, editor-in-chief at the Edinburgh-based Scandalgate, informed one press hack from the Ripoffs Gazette that the memoir will be sold in shops and online, regardless of protestations from Mr Blancmange.

Mr McTadger added that Blancmange had been paid an advance – rumoured to exceed what banksters and accountants refer to as ‘lots and lots of money’ - and since he had not submitted a completed manuscript nor repaid the advance, Scandalgate had decided to publish the first draft received last March to recoup their outlay and losses.

Apparently the WickedLeaks boss had worked with the celebrity ghost writers, Jake Marley and Ron Casper on the book, but later backed out and tried to cancel his contract.
However, in an asinine game of tit for tat, Blancmange claims the first draft is an unchecked work in progress and accused the publisher of profiteering.
Conversely McTadger retorted that Blancmange has now got cold feet over revealing his copious record of social failings and being a Western intelligence stooge, fed a stream of semi-anonymous disinformation for the purpose of propaganda and public perception management.

Blancmange, described by friends and associates alike as a bit of a knobhead who can’t even wipe his own arse properly, with the now-published first draft extract of his incomplete autobiography containing copies of e-mails from girlfriends past who branded him as a “totally useless twat, incapable of putting a condom on without tearing it” – and “a premature ejaculator who’s as much fun as chemotherapy”.

The first draft of the uncompleted manuscript candidly recounts Blancmange's early life growing up in Australia and how he became entranced and fascinated by conspiracy theories and unprotected sex with koalas and emus - to the founding of the secret-spilling Trojan horse website.

In reply to the news that Blancmange intended to sue them, Scandalgate issued a press release stating: "On 7th June 2011, with 38 publishing houses around the world committed to releasing the book, Julian informed us he wanted to cancel his contract.”
"Thus, as he had already pissed away his advance on booze and loose women, we decided to honour the spirit of the contract and publish. Once the advance has been earned out, we intend to honour the contract and pay Julian royalties – that is, of course, if any fucker or their dog bothers to buy a copy of the book."

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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