Sunday 11 September 2011

NHS: Russian Roulette With Blood Banks

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The lifetime ban on blood donations from men who have ‘bum’ sex with other men or consenting farm animals is expected to be lifted in the UK under the EUSSR’s latest political correctness ‘equal opportunities’ legislation – which earlier this year went so far as to attempt to criminalise the interpretation of the word ‘Gay’ as an ‘acronym inquisitive’ for ‘Got Aids Yet?’

While the donor restrictions were put in place in the balmy and sexually promiscuous days of the 1980’s to prevent the risk of AIDS contamination by arse bandits and generalised faggots into the heterosexual side of polite society, a dodgy cabal of Brussels shirt-lifting moronic bureaucrats are determined to throw common sense and logic to the wind and play what amounts to Russian roulette with blood transfusions whose donorship could well originate from some HIV-positive vindictive sodomite out to infect the entire planet with his vile pathogenic scatological contagion.

Several European countries have recently relaxed the rules for both blood and semen donors, basing the stipulated ‘window period’ for cottagers and felchers alike – (and too high risk ‘sex whorists’ dipping their wicks around the Third World’s fleshpots) - on the time elapsed since their last ‘suck n swallow’ or ‘anal penetrative’ homosexual encounter – now reducing such from one year to six months.

This decision has met with utter condemnation from the European medical profession at large, who collectively branded it a recipe for absolute disaster – citing the case of South Africa which, following criminally-liable World Health Organisation ill-advice, also adopted the fatally-flawed six month window period and have ended up with 95% of their population HIV-positive.

Countering charges of ‘junk science’ the WHO, in their own defence, pointed to research published at the end of last year which statistically proved there was no significant increase in the risk of HIV infection after the reduction of the one year to six months ‘window period’ rule in Australia – which critics automatically seized upon, citing the fact most Aussies blokes – straight or bent – prefer to shag sheep rather than one of their ubiquitous lager-swilling Sheilas with a big gob - or some effeminate twat called Trev or Bruce.

Have you been unable to give blood because of the lifetime ban? Should the ban be maintained or the EUSSR’s intended ‘zero window period’ ruling adopted? Send us your comments using the form below and we’ll add your name and address to our Homophobia Magazine mailing list.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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