New Met’ Chief to be Freemason

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Bwian Pillock, the Librarian-Dummercrat candidate for the 2012 London mayoral elections, is backing fellow Freemason, Sir Huge Rodent Ego OBE, the current head of the Association of Chief Police Officers, to become the next Metropolitan Plod Squad Commissioner.
A former Met’ Commander, Pillock told one press hack from the Nepotism Gazette that in his personal and unqualified opinion, Sir Huge would be the best candidate to head the force.

Pillock seized the opportunity of announcing his own fatally-flawed candidacy for the 2012 London mayoral election to promote a measure of positive spin and propaganda to support Sir Huge Ego as the man for the top job - to sort out the culture of deep-rooted criminality - and graft and corruption – which now infests the scandal-ridden Met’.

Sir Huge is believed to be one of four candidates in the running to replace the ignominious Sir Paul Stephenson as Commissioner - who committed ritual seppuku by falling on his own paper knife following revelations that there was absolutely no difference between an organized crime syndicate and the Met’s Plod Squad – apart from the fact membership of the latter provided a modicum of ‘prosecution-free’ indemnity – plus lots of kick-backs and a blue chip pension.

Stephenson opted for an easy way out ‘assisted suicide’ in the Grassy Knoll Woods last July amid damning revelations in the red top gutter press exposing the Met's immoral links with Rupert Mudrock’s felonious News International Mafioso, and which further revealed top ranking Scotland Yard officers picked up tax free cash-in-hand bribes of £30,000 quid for passing on restricted confidential information regarding secret investigations.

Speaking on BBC Radio 4's Renta-Cunt programme, Pillock opined: "We need a strong commissioner with a pair of balls running the Met’ and simply cannot afford to have another vacillating Rotary Club wimp like that twat Stephenson in charge. Personally I think my mate Sir Huge Ego’s just the man for the job – especially with his time spent in Northern Ireland, knee-capping Provos – and being a ranking Freemason too.”

Smegmashire Police Chief Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher; Acting Met’ Commissioner Tommy Badwin - and former Scouseland Police Authority head Des Fuctifino are also rumoured to have submitted applications for the Met’s vacant top dog post.

The new commissioner will be appointed on the recommendation of the Home Secretary, Theresa Maybe – (a non-Mason but active Townswomen’s Guild High Priestess) - who must take into account the opinions and preferences of the ultra-Zionist and Opus Dei member, London Mayor Bonkers Boris Nonsense - and also the shady cabal of Freemasons dominating the Metropolitan Police Authority.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

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