Thursday, 29 September 2011

Tony Bliar in Kikester Adultery Scandal

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Catholic convert, career hypocrite and pathological fibster all rolled into one scumbag - Tony Bliar, the pro-Zionist conflict-promoting Middle East Peace Envoy, is reported to have developed an ‘intimate’ relationship with Candida Mingerot – aka ‘Miss Moneybags’ – the sobriquet of Israel’s wealthiest divorcee, who has a ‘squatter’s mansion’ sited in the occupied West Bank on lands usurped from the rightful Palestinian owners.

Bliar's ‘bollocks-deep’ close relation with the 69-year-old high society Candida Mingerot, who divorced her fifth ‘toy boy’ gigolo husband last year due his addiction to 'Slush' salty snacks, has led to speculations in the Israeli media that they are “having it off” - according to copycat reports appearing in Britain’s gutter press red top tabloids.

Ms Mingerot is the controversial head of a £1.3 zillion quid food company whose monopoly stranglehold and exorbitant prices recently triggered the biggest socio-economic protests in the outlaw Israeli regime's 63 year history – with thousands of disaffected peasants demonstrating outside the food empire’s corporate offices in Jerusalem and branding her as a ‘right greedy cunt’.

The gospel according to the yidster rumour mill, Bliar pays frequent ‘nocturnal’ visits to the occupied territories as the representative of the Middle East's so-called 'Quartet,' – which consists of the United Nations, the United States, the European Union and Russia.

However, one of Bliar’s aides confided to gossiping media hacks that the purpose of these covert after-dark excursions was to coordinate corruption discussions with the Palestinian Authority of how much it was going to cost the Ashkenazi ‘Jews of convenience’ running the Knesset in bribe money to maintain the God’s Chosen People / Manifest Destiny scam (supported with lashings of hasbara, chutzpah and hudaibiya) - and continue to steal the Palestinian’s lands in the West Bank for more illegal settlements without kick starting a Third Intifada - plus still ignore United Nations’ resolutions and international moral condemnation for the human rights and wrongs abuses visited daily upon the heads of the hapless and marginalised Palestinians.

Conversely, the money-grubbing Bliar’s highly suspicious overnight ‘meetings’ with the Bris Milah Foods heiress prompted Jenny Cidal, a columnist for the Hebrew language scandal sheet, the Meshuggenah Review, to write an open letter to Blair's equally-grasping wife Cherie earlier this year - warning her to keep a beady eye on her shifty prick of a gold-digging husband.

Alas, the hapless Cherie – cursed with a gob like a burst car tyre and a set of gnashers that have equipped her to eat an apple through a tennis racket – simply hasn’t the shekels to secure Tony’s mercenary fidelity – unlike the aptly-monikered ‘Miss Candida Moneybags’ who is reportedly wealthier than Croesus – a fact attributed to Tel Aviv banksters who confirmed she is ‘stinking rich’- with an emphasis on 'stinking'.

Mingerot inherited the processed foods conglomerate established by her father, Shylock, who managed to splice the DNA of an African elephant with that of a Saddleback pig to produce the ‘Spammoth’ – a genetically-modified mammalian organism that weighs in at two tons when butchered and can fill several thousand cans of ‘kosher' luncheon meat – marketed in Israel under the ‘Rabbi’s Delight’ label.

As to the shifty Bliar, this is not the first time he’s been caught up in a sex scandal – even when disregarding his suspect ‘nudge n fudge’ association with the self-outed raving poofter and felching addict Lord Peter Scandalson - aka Vermin in Ermine.

To kick start his life of crime, Bliar appeared before Bow Street magistrates court in 1983 for importuning (soliciting) man-on-man sex in and around London’s public lavatories under the name of Charles Lynton (his middle names) an offence of intended homosexual buggery for which the would-be sodomite was subsequently fined, and bound over to keep his cock in his pants in the presence of polite company for twelve months.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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