Friday, 25 June 2010

Obama Gulf Drilling Ban Over-ruled

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

According to reports in this morning’s copies of the Daily Shitraker and the Scandalmonger’s Gazette – plus a dozen other red top gutter press tabloids - the federal judge who over-ruled and lifted President Barky O’Barmy's six-month drilling moratorium has personal financial interests in Transocean – the owner / operators of the doomed Deepshit Horizon drilling rig responsible for the current Gulf of Mexico oil-belching catastrophe - plus a significant number of other offshore energy companies.

Seymour Scumbaum Feldman, a career kikester and U.S. District Court Judge for the Eastern District of Redneck County, Louisiana, stated for the record when over-ruling the ban “Oil and gas production is quite simply elemental to Gulf communities so let’s not lose sight of our commercial objectives and contracts simply due another ‘minor’ oil spill.”

Hence with human avarice grasping for lucre regardless of consequences, the worshippers of Mammon have opened (or rather drilled a hole into) Pandora’s box by sinking a well into an immense reservoir of abiotic oil and gas capped by a pre-fractured and unstable sea bed geology that’s prerssurised to 100,000 psi by the volcanic magma chamber below.

But Judge Feldman was just looking after the interests of his industry buddies – plus himself – as he has energy stocks in Transocean, Scalliburton and Scumbaum Drilling (no relation) as well as two of BP's largest U.S. private shareholders -- BlackCock and JP Morgan (cut to the) Chase.

Below is a list of stocks from the Scumbaum’s personal oil and gas related portfolio.
JP Morgan Chase, BlackCock; Ocean Energy; NGP Capital Resources; Quicksilver Resources; Hercules Offshore, Provident Energy; Peabody Energy; PenGrowth Energy; RPC Inc.; Atlas Energy Resources; Parker Drilling; TXCO Resources; EV Energy Partners; Rowan Companies; BPZ Resources; El Paso Corp; KBR Inc; Chesapeake Energy and ATP Oil & Gas.

Hmmm, perhaps it’s just me - can anyone else smell a rat around here - or is it the fectal stench of ‘conflict of interest’?

The new Presidential law that Judge Feldman overturned would have halted the approval of any further permits and suspended deepwater drilling at 33 existing exploratory wells in the Gulf of Mexico, four of which are dodgy BP rigs – until some geo-rocket scientist comes up with a method of halting the zillion gallons per day leak of crude from the sea bed caused by BP’s disgraceful lack of initiative and due diligence in ignoring the warnings of the geophysicists regarding the inherent pre-fractured weaknesses of the sub sea strata.

"It's a pretty damning piece of evidence of conflict of interest," claims Betsy Titwank, Vice President for Energy Policy at American Progress. "Transocean is the world's largest offshore drilling company and holds most of the offshore drilling rigs in the world. Now straight after they sabotaged the Deepshit Horizon rig Scumbaum-Feldman is letting them continue drilling in other areas of the Gulf – that’s more fucked up than having a wank with a condom on.”

Thirty-seven of the thirty-eight active or senior judges in key Gulf Coast districts in Louisiana, Texas, Alabama, Mississippi and Florida have links to oil, gas and related energy industries – all of which own substantial amounts of stocks or bonds in these major oil companies they lobby for and return favourable judgements to – including BP, Scalliburton and Transocean.

Thus with the oil and gas industry ties among federal judges being so widespread and corruptly enmeshed, this has jeopardizing a law courts' ability to do routine business in anything resembling an honest fashion.

Meanwhile back at Idiocy Central in Washington, the Environmental Protection Agency has its spin doctors on 24/7 alert to dispel the truth that the Deepshit Horizon rig disaster was a planned scenario to create the cataclysmic mess that is now beginning to manifest itself, with the sub-sea flows burgeoning at such a geometric rate the sea floor will eventually burst in an apocalyptic volcanic type eruption, spewing a blanket of deadly toxic gases that will sweep inland and snuff everyone old enough to cough – immediately followed by an 80 to 120 foot high tsunami radiating out from the Deepshit Horizon drill site – that will definitely wash Florida off the map and also clean out the Cajun country mutants.

Hmmm, and the White House is allowing BP to administer the ‘impossible’ capping of its own sub-sea disaster – and supervise the cleanup with the Coreshite 9500 ‘dispersant’ (nope- not a solvent) that’s ten times more toxic than the crude itself.

A point in fact: stuff using Coreshite 9500 - there are currently 2000 oil skimmers in the United States that could be sailed around to the Gulf and at least attempt to keep on top of the ever-expanding mess of oil plumes.
So, why is this? President O’Barmy’s response was, “We can’t just take these skimmers from other places around the US coastline as they might have an oil spill themselves!” Que – is this guy for real? Oh yes, yet another case of the lunatics being placed in charge of the asylum.

But when BP can choose their own pet judge to adjudicate on all the oil damage lawsuits filed against them then something’s fucked up with a capital F.
Facing more than 100 lawsuits to date following the Deepshit Horizon explosion which killed 11 workers, countless fish, turtles and pelicans, and threatens four coastal states – plus Mexico itself - BP wants to place every pre-trial issue in the hands of a single federal judge in Houston – specifically District Judge Lynn Hughes.
Hughes travels the world giving ‘paid’ lectures on ‘ethics’ for the American Association of Petroleum Geologists, a professional association and research group that is so totally in bed with BP and other oil companies that it constitutes an incestuous relationship.

So, we have parties of oil industry self-interest – their PR propaganda spin doctors - and too the O’Barmy government’s sophistry spinster quacks – spewing out disingenuous optimism with regard to the continuing and unstoppable mega-flow of oil from the fractured seabed - and the cleanup operations.
But the critics are wisely silent and simply point a finger at the burgeoning environmental disaster zone – with nary a one wishing to be labelled a Doomsayer by making mention that the region’s hurricane season has already started.

Hurricane, cyclone, typhoon – they’re all the same ocean-generated ‘divine winds’. In Asia I’ve observed a typhoon blast in from the Pacific, batter the coast and move inland for sixty miles, leaving a visible coating of seawater salt on the ground, buildings and foliage in its wake.
Now, worst case scenario – not only will the next hurricane crossing the Gulf and making landfall from Texan to Florida coat everything with nasty unctuous crude oil but also the super-toxic Coreshite 9500 dispersant chemical. No shit, just wait until that crap gets into the food chain – and your kid’s DNA.

Carbon Credit Cap & Trade Exchange (aka Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: During the posting of this message a further fifty zillion barrels of crude oil spewed out of the BP well into the once-pristine azure waters of the Gulf of Mexico causing a mass extinction level event of marine life – including fish, birds, corals etc.

Allergy warning: This article was written in an oil-infested area and may contain traces of unctuous brown hydrocarbon slime and festering political bullshit mixed with lashings of PR spin and given a final veneer coating of criminal conspiracy.

Thought for the day: Could the dynamic duo of engineering bodge-up geniuses Wallace and Gromit be the answer to solving and curing the BP oil leak?

Thought for tomorrow: Three weeks before the Deepshit Horizon ‘accident’ Scalliburton negotiated the hostile buyout of the world's largest oil-spill cleanup firm Boots & Coots at the exact time financial intelligence agents at Gold in Sacks unloaded 44% of their investment stock in BP – and then something conveniently went ‘BANG!’

Rusty’s Skewed News Views – Purveyors of Bespoke Satire – enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of political incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist lobby.

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