Baron ‘Shoot First’ Pontificates on Gun Law

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

In the most moronic statement to be made since uttering his last moronic statement, Sir Ian Bliar – the newly-appointed ‘Lord Shoot First’ in the dissolution honours list - has announced for the benefit of the UK’s gangs and crews of Asbo-awarded yobs and scallies that the possession of a gun is a “privilege” – and an even bigger privilege if you actually have a firearms certificate or shotgun licence to legally own and possess one.

The disastrous ex-Metropolitan Police Commissioner Sir Ian Bliar, whose ennoblement to the rank of a Lord’s crossbencher, bearing the title of Baron Shoot First of the Brazil Nuts, has been challenged by the Amalgamated Electricians Union and judged the core reason for kick-starting protests outside the British Embassy in Rio del Janeiro this last week.

Regardless of past ignominies – such as denying overall responsibility yet exhibiting gross negligence and attempting a cover-up with reference to the criminal killing of Jean Charles de Menenzes at Stockwell Tube Station in 2005 when officers of the Met’s CO19 Armed Clot Unit, under the leadership of Commander Cressida Dickhead mistook the Brazilian electrician for a bomb-toting Muslim terrorist of Mid-East origin and turned his skull into a colander with 9mm parabellum hollow point bullets – Bliar’s recent ennoblement has obviously charged him with a holier than thou philosophy whereby he believes he can now pontificate to the unwashed masses concerning their social entitlements.

And what subject does this superbly arrogant Masonic Brahmin choose to sermonise on first? Why, gun control – how perfectly hypocritical considering the sinister failings of the incompetent CO19 gang of tossers at Stockwell Station – that were, post-mortem, categorised as a breach of HSE regulations and not an act of premeditated murder.
Oh yes, a breach of HSE regulations – which normally covers a smack on the wrist for not wearing steel toe-capped boots or eye protection or a hard hat – not shooting some hapless migrant Brazilian commuter in the head until it exploded.

However, the gospel according to St Ian of Bliar proclaims “The possession of a firearm is a privilege, not, except in a few cases, a necessity,” – which is in fact absolute bullshit as it has been an entitlement guaranteed to all British subjects by the Bill of Rights of 1689.
Per se, on philosophy rooted in centuries past, the entire basis of English Common Law is the assumption that everything that was not forbidden was legal – a factor that this self-appointed arbiter of our morals and legal codes and entitlements seems to have conveniently overlooked – or more likely has been ignorant of all along.

Thus under the premises of Lord Bliar’s dialectic this ‘bestowing of privilege’ might next be applied to what aspects of our social endeavours that are not already bemired by autocratic restrictions?
The mind and psyche quivers at the thoughts going through the perverted minds of these EUSSR fascist officials and regulators.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and / or squirrel shit.

Thought for the day: If a bear shits on the platform at Stockwell Tube Station is it likely to get mega-tapped in the bonce by the CO19 Armed Numpty Squad or just cop for a HSE fine?