Holyrood: Scotland’s Hypocrisy Central

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Lord Advocate Elish Angiolini, (nee McPhilmein) Caledonia's top law officer, has announced for the public record that she is to step down from the political post she has so incompetently occupied, to the utter detriment of justice, since October 2006.
Rumour has it that the 96-year old desiccated Angiolini, the first woman to hold the role, will relinquish her post after next May's Holyrood election to undergo a conscience transplant since her original one was surgically removed during a Black Mass a couple of decades ago.

With a view to her failure (read ‘stubborn refusal’) to pursue, investigate or prosecute the litany of child sexual abuse cases that have occurred (and continue to) for decades in and around bonny Scotland’s kiddie fiddling – and crime – capital of Scaberdeen, it was quite ironic the Angiolini creature chose the advent of the annual Sexual Offences Conference in Glasgow to announce her resignation as Chief of Official Criminal Coverups.

The inept and corrupt Lord Advocate informed one reporter from the Scandalmongers Gazette that it had been an enormous privilege to serve as a prosecutor and law officer for 27 years and do her bit to protect the immoral felons, pederasts and butt-fucking perverts who comprise the ranks of Scotland’s elitist Freemasonry and Satanist establishment and officialdom - from the lofty heights of Parliament down through justice to police to education to health and social services.

Speaking at a blood sucking event later, Angoilini announced "I can think of no more fitting occasion than this conference to announce that I’m standing down from office at the next election, and to thank those who work tirelessly with me to use the statutes of the criminal justice system to block investigations into this annoying Hollie Grieg sexual abuse case that threatens to expose our 33rd Degree Chief Warlock, Sir Hector MacPindar, and the rest of our Devil-worshipping paedophile brethren in Scaberdeen.”

Scotland’s dumpy First Minister Alex ‘Sockeye‘ Salmond, declared to the conference’s audience “It has been a pleasure to work with Elish since 2007 and her term as Lord Advocate has been marked by significant improvements and substantial success in the disposal of justice in Scotland – straight down the toilet. Among her many achievements are reforms to the child-snatching family courts system and a much-needed new approach to tackling sexual crime – buy imposing a policy of totally ignoring complaints or simply murdering the victims or those petitioning on their behalf.”

So, we raise a most pertinent point. Is the corrupt slut’s replacement as Lord Advocate going to be any more morally honest and pursue the likes of Scaberdeen’s Ferryhill Freemasons paedo’ gang – all comprised of local worthies and establishment bigwigs? Is the infamous kiddie-fiddling fudger Sheriff McBuggery finally going to get the chop? Will Justice Secretary Kenny MacAskill, the MSP for Mussel Soup, take the initiative and tear down the augean walls of Grampian’s Sin City and its profligate St Sodoms Chapel for Latter Day Catamites?

Is there a fresh sense of justice in the air? Absolutely not – it’s just the old stench of graft and corruption – and fectal remains from the coprophagous Satanist’s last carnal banquet and licentious bingeing on the fractured emotions and molested, debauched bodies of helpless special needs children.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and / or squirrel shit.

Oh, and by the way, fuck the Freemasons and their Satanic New World Order.