Pope Catholic – but is Putin Jewish?

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Israeli officials have urged visiting Russian President Vlad Putrid to have the end snipped off his cock, become one of God’s Chosen People, then adopt a more aggressive stance on curbing Iran's nuclear ambitions by joining the ZioNazi-led ‘Coalition of the Psychos’ to bomb the manky Mullahs and their Islamic Republic back to the Stone Age.

Ex-KGB attack dog Putrid, along with his Kremilin crime syndicate trade delegation, are risking a first Middle East tour since the Iraq war’s depleted uranium dust settled, and are aiming to secure a discount supply of fresh figs and dates for Russia's chronically constipated population – with a pit stop call in Damascus scheduled to discuss Basher Assad’s latest weapons requirements to gain a leading edge in the burgeoning civil war against the Western-backed mercenaries and rag-arsed rebel groups infiltrated from Libya and Iraq.

Following an invitation from the Russian migrant Rabbi Sheldon Scumbagsky to pay a visit to Jerusalem’s Wailing Wall and bang his head against the millenniums-old stonework while wearing a traditional kippah, Putrid met with the Coptic Orthodox Metropolitan of Jerusalem and jointly attended a Christian Aid ‘Common Sense Revival’ rally up on Calvary Hill, where he was presented with a personalised 'No Nails' crucifixion kit memento of his visit to Palestine.

Putrid later held a ten minute meeting with Israeli Prime Minister Bobo Nuttyahoo, who later informed one press hack from the Warmongers Gazette that "We didn’t quite see eye to eye on the Iranian issue but managed to agree to ‘disagree’ with President Putrid’s opinion that nuclear weapons in the hands of Tehran’s mad Mullahs would probably pose as grave a danger to world peace as nuclear weapons in the hands of Israel.”

The US, Israel and their European stooge allies have ganged up alike a cabal of schoolyard bullies to accuse Iran of pursuing military objectives in its domestic nuclear energy program – which all comes down to the sad fact that the rogue Zionist state perceives the Tehran regime as a threat to its illusionary military hegemony in the Mid-East (if the latent armed might and resolve of Hezbollah is fatally disregarded).

Putrid’s advice to Nuttyahoo and his racist Knesset was that Israel should think twice – or perhaps three or four times - before sticking their necks out and expediting a pre-emptive sneak attack on Iran - saying Jerusalem should learn lessons from the major fuck ups caused by the United States’ in Iraq and Afghanistan – and anywhere else they poke their war-mongering noses.

One highlight of his visit to the rogue Zionist state, President Putrid participated in the long-overdue unveiling of a World War Two ‘Let’s Forgive & Forget’ smiley face monument to the Holohoax - and on Tuesday travelled to the West Bank to witness for himself the litany of disgusting human rights abuses visited on the hapless and marginalised Palestinian population by the occupying Israeli military forces – specifically the violent acts of suppression doled out by the IDF’s Hafganat Koah Brigade whose bully boy thugs specialize in protecting illegal settlers - and slaughtering innocent Palestinian civilians.

During a lunchtime get-together hosted by Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud Abbas and Hamas’ Gaza Gangsters leader Khaled Meshaal at the Manger Bar and Grill, right next door to St Shylock’s Temple for Latter Day Neshekers in the occupied West Bank town of Bethlehem, Putrid held a Q & A session and discussed what it was like being besieged behind the Israeli’s 30 foot high Great Apartheid Walls in the biggest Nazi style concentration camps on the planet – ironically established on what was once their very own sovereign state of Palestine prior to the 1948 Yawm an-Nakbah (Day of the Catastrophe) which marked the start of the continuing Palestinian Holocaust and the 64 year spiral of injustice they continue to suffer.

In a meeting with Israeli President ‘Shifty Shimon’ Peres, Putrid dismissed a personal request that he join with Israel in the campaign against a nuclear Iran - and too Peres warning that a real danger existed of Russian chemical weapons of mass distraction supplied to Basher Assad’s Damascus regime reaching the hands of Hezbollah and al-Qaeda and being turned against the peace-loving state of Israel.

Putrid denied, with his customary ham-fisted diplomatic finesse, that they had supplied Syria with such weapons then stated for the public record "From the very beginning of the so-called Arab Spring revolutions initiated by the Great Satan, Russia has been persuading its partners that democratic changes should take place in a civilised manner and with a minimum of bloodshed – but, as the t-shirt says, ‘Shit Happens’."

Thought for the day. Yet another ‘First’ from the ZioNazi’s Hypocrisy Central Command.
Israeli PM Bobo Nuttyahoo, in an pathetic and brazen attempt to get Putrid and the Russians behind their latest Arab Spring regime change plans for Syria, told the media - Quote: “The killing and horrible suffering of the Syrian people must stop” – yet made no mention of the same privations his own military visit on the Palestinian populations of the West Bank and Gaza Strip on a daily basis.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.