Thursday, 26 January 2012

US Military Okays Murder of Civilians

In this morning’s ‘Justifiable Homicide’ enhanced bullshit edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The good ole US of A yesterday sent the Red Cross, Amnesty International and the Ox-Rat human rights and wrongs watchdogs into a collective state of convulsive apoplexy when a military court in California set the most scandalous and immoral precedent of the century concerning non-combatant Muslims in the Mid-East war zones - by sanctioning their gung-ho, trigger-happy psycho troops with the judicially-approved right to shoot first - then make excuses later – and all covered by a get out of jail free card.

The highly controversial decision by a Military Tribunal at Camp Bonkers stated that the US Marine, who admitted charges to his part in the cold-blooded slaughter of 24 unarmed Iraqi civilians in 2005, should face no time in detention for ‘spur-of-the-moment’ mistakes made during the heat of battle was, post-hearing, approved by General Billy Bob Warthog, CIC of the Marine Corps Forces Central Command.

The atrocious events that occurred in Iraq’s Haditha have been the subject of several official whitewash attempts and cover-ups, which unfortunately resulted in criminal charges eventually being filed against members of Psycho Company, 3rd Body Bag Battalion, 1st Marine Cannon Fodder Regiment – who were alleged to have gone on a homicidal rampage and carried out the killings as they were bored with watching porno on Sky’s Filth channel and guarding the Haditha Dam.

Marine Sgt Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher faced a maximum of three months imprisonment after admitting dereliction of duty and perjuriously claiming the civilian deaths occurred in the Operation Kill Every Fucker crackdown on the cottage industry IED factories in the area – which resulted in the massacre of women, children and elderly people - including a man in a wheelchair who was later identified as Old Achmed, a retired goat herder and not the notorious Al Qaeda bomber ‘Semtex’ Shaheed bin Ka-Boom.

McGnasher was one of eight marines arrested over the killings, with the charges against five of the group being dropped or dismissed, and one acquitted on the grounds of diminished responsibility due suffering from pre-menstrual tension – with Sgt Sanick Dela Ratfink granted immunity in exchange for snitching on his fellow psychopaths and giving evidence to the court.

Military judge Lt Col Sheldon Scumberger informed one press hack from the Ethnic Cleansing Gazette that “My hands had been tied by the terms of the plea agreement that were ratified by the Pentagon - as everyone had grassed each other up – apart from Sgt McGnasher. But, Goddamn, what do these heathens expect when they go hiding their weapons of mass distraction so we can't find them and making us look dumb - - of course we’re gonna play rough.”
“Hellfire, I don’t know what the big deal is all about - the victims would have all been dead six months down the road anyways from all the toxic depleted uranium dust poisoning them.”

One survivor of Operation Kill Every Fucker was Awis ibn Himar, a former wheelbarrow mechanic, who suffered minor bullet wounds and opined to a reporter from the Flimflam Gazette "I was expecting that the American judiciary would sentence these murderers to life in prison so they might be sodomised by their macho cellmates and suck cock until they choked and descended into Jahannum (Hell) to be the catamites of Iblis (the Devil) for all eternity.”
“We expected the Kenyan Obama to appear on the telly to confess in front of the whole world the guilt of their soldiers in committing these crimes – and then the Great Satan America would show itself as democratic and fair."

Hmmm, some chance of that happening. Ah well, Awis - that’s what Dante’s Ninth Circle of Hell is reserved for – real class-act scumbags.

Thought for the day. Fuck the Great Satan and their ZioNazi New World Order.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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