Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The Tory Work & Pensions Minister Iain Duncan Smith yesterday informed a press hack from the Surrender Monkeys Gazette that ‘utter chaos and mayhem’ would have reigned in the City if Downing Street’s Libservative Coalition cabinet had overruled the Royal Bank of Scumland board’s performance awards decision and vetoed a £963,000 share bonus for its CEO Stephen ‘Tally-Ho’ Hester.
Although Duncan Smith’s scaremongering comments are now diffused to a lesser extent as Hester himself informed gutter press reporters on Monday that “Good grief, after pocketing a £1.2 million base salary and £6.5 million quid’s worth of shares as a bonus last year what would I do with a measly million quid – apart from buy another country estate or stick it in a bank somewhere – probably one of those ever-reliable offshore tax-dodging havens in the Caribbean.”
Contributing his efforts to reduce the cacophony of the public’s hue and cry of “Foul!” the RBS chairman Sir Hugh Jampton has also decided to abide by this path of caution in refusing a £1.4 zillion share bonus after advising the bank's remuneration committee it would not be appropriate in the circumstances – especially so as he was ‘filthy rich already’.
Conversely, the ‘hue and cry’ brouhaha might yet kick off anew when the taxpayers and shit-stirring media learn what other grasping RBS executives are going to pocket in the way of excessive performance bonuses for simply keeping the bank afloat by raking in the usurious interest payments on past loans – while refusing to lend a single penny to small businesses or mortgage applicants.
Under Hester’s leadership the value of RBS shares has not so much fallen but substantially plummeted - to a mere 27 pence as confidence in the ailing bank and his custodianship have dropped at a like rate of catastrophic descent – with stocks down 48% over the last year from their 2007 high of 370 pence.
To wit, the bank is now worth less than half of what the hapless taxpayers coughed up for the shares when rescuing the group with an injected £45.5 billion quid of fresh capital – an investment that has fallen in value by a painful £27 billion.
News of the lavish RSB bonuses has pricked up the hackles of people across the swathe of the political spectrum, with London Mayor Bonkers Boris Nonsense, himself a die-hard blue-nosed Tory and money-grubbing oick, informing media reporters that the bonuses allotted to a bunch of incompetent RBS bankster shits were – to quote: “These awards are obscene and absolutely bloody bewildering as I don’t get paid anywhere near that – nor did my predecessor Red Ken Livingroom.”
Parliamentary opposition leader Ed Millipede, oblivious to the gross hypocrisy fact it was due 13 years of New Labour mismanagement that nurtured this exorbitant bonus culture, accused Prime Minister Posh Dave Scameron of a disgraceful failure of leadership for permitting, as opposed to vetoing, the bumper bonuses being paid to the executives of a publicly-owned organisation which has sacked over 21,000 staff since Hester took charge - and whose share price is down 36% over the last year – yet are able to conjure up a £500 million performance bonus kitty to dole out between themselves.
Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher, the director of the government abuse monitor Kunt-Watch, speaking on BBC One's Andrew ‘Bat-Ears’ Marr programme, expressed the widely held opinion that these bloated executive pay packages are the result of unbridled and irresponsible capitalism which gave the cash-strapped proletariat a slap in the face impression of a Marie Antoinettesque ‘let them eat cake’ culture that’s out of control.
“Yer got these pondscum bankster exec’s at the RBS pocketin’ wot hedge fund managers an’ bean counters refer to as ‘lots and lots of effin’ money’ from a financial institution wot was a profit-sharin’ scheme that suffered a severe polarity shift in 2008 an’ instantly became a multi-billion quid loss-sharin’ scheme wot got dumped straight on the backs of Broken Britain’s hapless taxpayers like Quasimodo’s hump.”
“So bollocks ter Ian Duncan Smith talkin’ about a state of effin’ ‘chaos’ descendin’ on the RBS if Downin’ Street kiboshes these bonuses – the whole shebang woz in utter fuckin’ chaos cos of Freddy Goodwin’s incompetence when the bank went bust an’ we had ter bail them out – an’ that prick gets a knighthood fer causin’ the balls-up.”
“The entire RBS board’s a bunch of vulgarians wot’s laughin’ at the workin’ classes an’ unemployed – an’ us blokes wiv zero social status are getting’ our noses rubbed in the smelly brown stuff yet again.”
“Just look at wot this Rupert de Twatt, the top dog of the RBS Ripoffs Division’s gettin’ fer his effin’ performance bonus - £1:6 million nicker – an’ that’s fer foreclosin’ on bad loans an’ repossessin’ some poor fucker’s house an’ tossin’ the wife an’ kids out on the streets ter live.”
“Then yer got this shitbag Slimy Stephen Hester at the top of the predator pile – wot’s picked up over £11 million quid in pay an’ bonuses since he took over in 2008 an’ comes across as the type of conscienceless Philistine wot lacks any trace of human empathy fer another sentient bein’ but rather relishes wiv a perverse delight goin’ out on the hunt, ridin’ his effin’ horse an’ watchin’ a pack of hounds rip an emotionally-distraught fox ter pieces for fun – an’ that’s banksters for yer.”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Tuesday, 31 January 2012
Rothshite Denies Scandalson Graft Links
In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Nutty Natty Rothshite, the zillionaire hedge fund financier and spoiled brat scion of the ultra-Zionist ‘quantitative easing’ bankster empire, has been forced to endure a hectic media-exposure week of lying through his teeth while giving evidence at his libel case hearing against the Daily Shitraker over their 2010 article which had the audacity to get a bit too close to the truth by shining the Klieg lights on the nasty company he keeps.
Apparently the news report exposed the compromising fact that Natty had invited the unscrupulous Lord Peter Scandalson to join him for a weekend whistle-stop tour of Siberia and meet up with Russian oligarch Oleg Mobsaroubles - the owner of Gulag Gaz and Wankprom Oil - to bestow his EUSSR Trade Commissioner blessings on a £500 million quid dodgy deal and hold ‘who gets what’ discussions over lifting Brussels’ anti-dumping tariffs on aluminium imports to exempt and singly benefit Mobsaroubles’ RussKrapp aluminium conglomerate at the expense of other manufacturers and traders - following allegations they had been fly tipping cheap aluminium foil onto the European markets.
Judge Toby Tugithard, presiding over Court 14 of the Royal Courts of Justice, heard that Scandalson enjoyed the invigorating pleasures of a Russian banya steam bath during his 24-hour visit to the remote region as a guest of Oleg Mobsaroubles – along with Canadian gold magnate Percy Skunk and a certain Rothshite bankster stooge, Sebastian von Fudge – founder of the Vienna Cottagers Society.
Giving evidence on his own behalf, Rothshite swore on a multi-denominational stack of Bibles, Torahs and Korans that the former New Labour minister’s presence was purely recreational and wholly devoid of any corrupt intent – merely a big boys’ get-together which included a visit to the Banya Sauna Club where, while sweating buckets, they were flagellated with bundles of birch twigs by Mobsaroubles’ girl friend - the Ukrainian celebrity nightclub stripper Tekem Orloff - then following a good thrashing, plunged into an outdoor ice bath together to complete the masochistic 'beast with two backs’ bonding ritual.
Ms Sue Fleecem QC, acting for Natty Rothshite, claimed the Daily Shitraker article painted her client as a puppet-master involved in dubious games with the former New Labour spin doctor and Russia's richest scumbag.
Scandalson's relationship with Mobsaroubles came under the spotlight in 2008, following his shifty appointment as Business Secretary for International Graft & Corruption to Gordon Brown’s fatally-flawed New Labour government.
During that period he faced raging criticisms over conflicts of interest surrounding a summer visit to Mobsaroubles’ yacht - a converted US aircraft carrier that boasts an Olympic sized swimming pool in every guest suite and a verdant Astroturf soccer pitch complete with floodlights - anchored off the Rothshite crime syndicate’s summer villa on the Greek island of Corfu – to further discuss the dodgy £500 zillion nicker deal between the Russian and executives from the US-based Anaconda Aluminium – in the presence of the Rothshite crime syndicate patriarch and Natty’s father, Baron Ja’ackoff – and the-then Conservative Shadow Chancellor Georgie Osborne.
The offending Daily Shitraker article further branded Lord Peter Scandalson of the Felchers as ‘Vermin in Ermine’ and the type of twat who intuitively prompts people to count their fingers after shaking hands with him.
In addition to his established index of shameful notoriety, Scandalson has developed close links with the ruler of oil-rich Kazakhstan and recently spoke at two events organised by Borat Sagdiyev’s Kazakh investment company – Ripoff-Kazyn SA - then flew off in one of the Rothshite executive jets to meet with the dictator of Uzbekistan – President Islam Karimov - the dodgy despot topping the hate lists of every human rights and wrongs activist group on the planet - who has given an all-new definition to the London Met Plod Squad’s strategy of ‘kettling’ pro-democracy political protesters – by boiling them alive.
Do you think Peter Scandalson is the type of scumbag whose serial abuse of privilege and exaggerated sense of entitlement - and delusional importance in the greater scheme of things – serves to give lobbyists a bad name? Or is he simply yet another power-hungry stooge having his official positions extorted by commercial manipulators via the tried and tested routes of ego-massage, bribery and blackmail?
Send us your comments using the online reply form below and you could win an all-expenses paid trip to Siberia and get flogged by some erotic strapon-wielding Dominatrix slut in a traditional sauna setting - while thinking how to win a trip back home again.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Nutty Natty Rothshite, the zillionaire hedge fund financier and spoiled brat scion of the ultra-Zionist ‘quantitative easing’ bankster empire, has been forced to endure a hectic media-exposure week of lying through his teeth while giving evidence at his libel case hearing against the Daily Shitraker over their 2010 article which had the audacity to get a bit too close to the truth by shining the Klieg lights on the nasty company he keeps.
Apparently the news report exposed the compromising fact that Natty had invited the unscrupulous Lord Peter Scandalson to join him for a weekend whistle-stop tour of Siberia and meet up with Russian oligarch Oleg Mobsaroubles - the owner of Gulag Gaz and Wankprom Oil - to bestow his EUSSR Trade Commissioner blessings on a £500 million quid dodgy deal and hold ‘who gets what’ discussions over lifting Brussels’ anti-dumping tariffs on aluminium imports to exempt and singly benefit Mobsaroubles’ RussKrapp aluminium conglomerate at the expense of other manufacturers and traders - following allegations they had been fly tipping cheap aluminium foil onto the European markets.
Judge Toby Tugithard, presiding over Court 14 of the Royal Courts of Justice, heard that Scandalson enjoyed the invigorating pleasures of a Russian banya steam bath during his 24-hour visit to the remote region as a guest of Oleg Mobsaroubles – along with Canadian gold magnate Percy Skunk and a certain Rothshite bankster stooge, Sebastian von Fudge – founder of the Vienna Cottagers Society.
Giving evidence on his own behalf, Rothshite swore on a multi-denominational stack of Bibles, Torahs and Korans that the former New Labour minister’s presence was purely recreational and wholly devoid of any corrupt intent – merely a big boys’ get-together which included a visit to the Banya Sauna Club where, while sweating buckets, they were flagellated with bundles of birch twigs by Mobsaroubles’ girl friend - the Ukrainian celebrity nightclub stripper Tekem Orloff - then following a good thrashing, plunged into an outdoor ice bath together to complete the masochistic 'beast with two backs’ bonding ritual.
Ms Sue Fleecem QC, acting for Natty Rothshite, claimed the Daily Shitraker article painted her client as a puppet-master involved in dubious games with the former New Labour spin doctor and Russia's richest scumbag.
Scandalson's relationship with Mobsaroubles came under the spotlight in 2008, following his shifty appointment as Business Secretary for International Graft & Corruption to Gordon Brown’s fatally-flawed New Labour government.
During that period he faced raging criticisms over conflicts of interest surrounding a summer visit to Mobsaroubles’ yacht - a converted US aircraft carrier that boasts an Olympic sized swimming pool in every guest suite and a verdant Astroturf soccer pitch complete with floodlights - anchored off the Rothshite crime syndicate’s summer villa on the Greek island of Corfu – to further discuss the dodgy £500 zillion nicker deal between the Russian and executives from the US-based Anaconda Aluminium – in the presence of the Rothshite crime syndicate patriarch and Natty’s father, Baron Ja’ackoff – and the-then Conservative Shadow Chancellor Georgie Osborne.
The offending Daily Shitraker article further branded Lord Peter Scandalson of the Felchers as ‘Vermin in Ermine’ and the type of twat who intuitively prompts people to count their fingers after shaking hands with him.
In addition to his established index of shameful notoriety, Scandalson has developed close links with the ruler of oil-rich Kazakhstan and recently spoke at two events organised by Borat Sagdiyev’s Kazakh investment company – Ripoff-Kazyn SA - then flew off in one of the Rothshite executive jets to meet with the dictator of Uzbekistan – President Islam Karimov - the dodgy despot topping the hate lists of every human rights and wrongs activist group on the planet - who has given an all-new definition to the London Met Plod Squad’s strategy of ‘kettling’ pro-democracy political protesters – by boiling them alive.
Do you think Peter Scandalson is the type of scumbag whose serial abuse of privilege and exaggerated sense of entitlement - and delusional importance in the greater scheme of things – serves to give lobbyists a bad name? Or is he simply yet another power-hungry stooge having his official positions extorted by commercial manipulators via the tried and tested routes of ego-massage, bribery and blackmail?
Send us your comments using the online reply form below and you could win an all-expenses paid trip to Siberia and get flogged by some erotic strapon-wielding Dominatrix slut in a traditional sauna setting - while thinking how to win a trip back home again.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Monday, 30 January 2012
Tory Welfare Cuts Boost Disabled Suicides
In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Disability activists and UK Uncut brought all traffic – including the ubiquitous speedy Boris Bikes – to a standstill for hours on Saturday by chaining themselves together across Regent Street in protest against the content of the insidious Welfare Reform Bill that has to date been the catalyst of cause in the documented despair-related suicides of thirty-one disabled persons since the benefit cuts were announced.
The gospel according to the Mencap charity, the planned cuts to the disability living allowance under this Tory-sponsored bill will see 500,000 disabled ‘zero social status’ useless eaters pushed to the proverbial breadline and forced to attempt to survive on £25 quid per week after paying rent and utility costs – while by contrast MPs are living the life of Riley and raking in £65,738 nicker per annum plus enjoying such a lavish regime of expenses they can afford to have their country heap moats dredged and finance floating pagodas for their ducks out of the taxpaying public’s purse.
The demonstration – which brought Oxford Circus to a halt and drove London Mayor Bonkers Boris Nonsense to paroxysms of apoplexy – was the result of an alliance between Disabled People Against Cuts and Ox-Rat, the government abuse watchdog charity – who provided advice on how to stage an eye-catching, media-frenzied event by setting fire to a couple of pensioners and their mobility scooters.
Within half an hour the ‘Raspberry Ripple’ human barricade had traffic stationary along Regent and Oxford streets - with congestion backed up as far as the M25 at Borehamwood as hundreds of demonstrators and their supporters blocked the junction, chanting, playing drums and waving placards against the welfare reform bill, which the Libservative Coalition are currently trying to ramrod through the House of Conmans.
One of the protest group’s spokesmen Frank McCrutch told reporters “I’ve limped all the way here from Gimpborough Hamlets this mornin’ cos us disabled people need ter work together ter get our voices heard cos this effin’ government sees us as an easy target. But it all comes down ter rhetoric versus reality an’ Posh Dave Scameron an’ his tosspot cabinet ain’t gonna solve this Debtocracy mess of pottage by robbin’ us disabled folks of our benefits like wot I’ve had fer the last 20 years an’ now suddenly they’ve decided I don’t need ‘em anymore. Really, I kid yer not – this benefit cuts move is fraught with the spectre of unintended consequences.”
“So wot I’m plannin’ if this welfare bill goes through Parliament then I’m gonna buy a gallon of unleaded gasoline an’ limp me way up ter the public gallery in the House of effin’ Conmans an’ pour the lot over me effin’ head then light up a rollie an’ go ‘Ka-fuckin’-Boom’ an’ see if that gets the point across like wot that bloke Mohamed Bouazizi did in Tunisia last year. Course I’ll have a big suicide note hangin' round me neck written on a sheet of asbestos.”
Press hacks also descended on celebrity disabled anarchist Jody McIntire for interviews as he sat defiantly in the middle of Oxford Circus, strapped securely in his Condor ‘Combat’ XLR-Super-Gimp paramilitary model wheelchair (as used by crippled Special Forces troops in Afghanistan) armed with a can of pepper spray and a 75,000 volts taser – informing reporters “Let’s see if the Met’s Renta-Thug bullies have any luck up-ending me wheels an’ draggin’ me across the road this time around.”
A stern word of warning came from the Met Plod Squad’s new Commissioner, Bernard ‘Hulk’ Hogan - aka the ‘Scourge of Scouseland’ – who informed officers of the Territorial Support Group “I don’t want any April Fool’s Day repeats of the 2009 G20 protests – so be careful none of these Bolshie shits are filming you on a camcorder or smart phone – and for fuck’s sake don’t murder any alkie news vendors this time around.”
After the road had been blocked for just over an hour, police asked politely over a loudhailer for the protesters to move – to which they replied with a collective “Fuck off!” However, once a hailstorm erupted at 14:00 hours they unchained themselves voluntarily and exited at a rate of knots towards Harrods for afternoon cream teas and a change of incontinence diapers.
Interviewed later on Saturday evening by Andrew ‘Bat-Ears’ Marr on BBC1’s ‘Gross Incompetence Hour’ programme, the Minister for Work & Pensions, Iain Duncan Smith, and incumbent Tory MP for the Chigley and Camberwick Green constituencies – a man described by friends and political associates alike as having the personality of a chemotherapy clinic – and being the type of person you can take anywhere twice – the second time to apologise – offered his opinions on the day’s protest events.
“Really, I don’t know what’s wrong with these people. They get free crutches on the NHS and all those prosthetic thingies. Not like in Long John Silver’s day when a bloke had to whittle his own from a lump of driftwood or go out in the dark nasty woods to lob a branch off a tree and risk getting another leg bitten off by wolves.”
“Oh well, I suppose we should look on the brighter side of things as if these benefit-cuts related suicides continue at the same geometric rate then the disabled welfare payment paradox will become self-solving and of great assistance to the UN’s proposed Agenda 21 mass euthanasia cull of all the human race’s deadwood.”
“Now I know that comment’s going to cop for a barrage of flack from human rights and wrongs groups but just wait until the NHS start with their scaremongering family planning propaganda next week - with bloody big posters and ad’s on the telly promoting their ‘Abortion’s safer than giving birth’ campaign.”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Disability activists and UK Uncut brought all traffic – including the ubiquitous speedy Boris Bikes – to a standstill for hours on Saturday by chaining themselves together across Regent Street in protest against the content of the insidious Welfare Reform Bill that has to date been the catalyst of cause in the documented despair-related suicides of thirty-one disabled persons since the benefit cuts were announced.
The gospel according to the Mencap charity, the planned cuts to the disability living allowance under this Tory-sponsored bill will see 500,000 disabled ‘zero social status’ useless eaters pushed to the proverbial breadline and forced to attempt to survive on £25 quid per week after paying rent and utility costs – while by contrast MPs are living the life of Riley and raking in £65,738 nicker per annum plus enjoying such a lavish regime of expenses they can afford to have their country heap moats dredged and finance floating pagodas for their ducks out of the taxpaying public’s purse.
The demonstration – which brought Oxford Circus to a halt and drove London Mayor Bonkers Boris Nonsense to paroxysms of apoplexy – was the result of an alliance between Disabled People Against Cuts and Ox-Rat, the government abuse watchdog charity – who provided advice on how to stage an eye-catching, media-frenzied event by setting fire to a couple of pensioners and their mobility scooters.
Within half an hour the ‘Raspberry Ripple’ human barricade had traffic stationary along Regent and Oxford streets - with congestion backed up as far as the M25 at Borehamwood as hundreds of demonstrators and their supporters blocked the junction, chanting, playing drums and waving placards against the welfare reform bill, which the Libservative Coalition are currently trying to ramrod through the House of Conmans.
One of the protest group’s spokesmen Frank McCrutch told reporters “I’ve limped all the way here from Gimpborough Hamlets this mornin’ cos us disabled people need ter work together ter get our voices heard cos this effin’ government sees us as an easy target. But it all comes down ter rhetoric versus reality an’ Posh Dave Scameron an’ his tosspot cabinet ain’t gonna solve this Debtocracy mess of pottage by robbin’ us disabled folks of our benefits like wot I’ve had fer the last 20 years an’ now suddenly they’ve decided I don’t need ‘em anymore. Really, I kid yer not – this benefit cuts move is fraught with the spectre of unintended consequences.”
“So wot I’m plannin’ if this welfare bill goes through Parliament then I’m gonna buy a gallon of unleaded gasoline an’ limp me way up ter the public gallery in the House of effin’ Conmans an’ pour the lot over me effin’ head then light up a rollie an’ go ‘Ka-fuckin’-Boom’ an’ see if that gets the point across like wot that bloke Mohamed Bouazizi did in Tunisia last year. Course I’ll have a big suicide note hangin' round me neck written on a sheet of asbestos.”
Press hacks also descended on celebrity disabled anarchist Jody McIntire for interviews as he sat defiantly in the middle of Oxford Circus, strapped securely in his Condor ‘Combat’ XLR-Super-Gimp paramilitary model wheelchair (as used by crippled Special Forces troops in Afghanistan) armed with a can of pepper spray and a 75,000 volts taser – informing reporters “Let’s see if the Met’s Renta-Thug bullies have any luck up-ending me wheels an’ draggin’ me across the road this time around.”
A stern word of warning came from the Met Plod Squad’s new Commissioner, Bernard ‘Hulk’ Hogan - aka the ‘Scourge of Scouseland’ – who informed officers of the Territorial Support Group “I don’t want any April Fool’s Day repeats of the 2009 G20 protests – so be careful none of these Bolshie shits are filming you on a camcorder or smart phone – and for fuck’s sake don’t murder any alkie news vendors this time around.”
After the road had been blocked for just over an hour, police asked politely over a loudhailer for the protesters to move – to which they replied with a collective “Fuck off!” However, once a hailstorm erupted at 14:00 hours they unchained themselves voluntarily and exited at a rate of knots towards Harrods for afternoon cream teas and a change of incontinence diapers.
Interviewed later on Saturday evening by Andrew ‘Bat-Ears’ Marr on BBC1’s ‘Gross Incompetence Hour’ programme, the Minister for Work & Pensions, Iain Duncan Smith, and incumbent Tory MP for the Chigley and Camberwick Green constituencies – a man described by friends and political associates alike as having the personality of a chemotherapy clinic – and being the type of person you can take anywhere twice – the second time to apologise – offered his opinions on the day’s protest events.
“Really, I don’t know what’s wrong with these people. They get free crutches on the NHS and all those prosthetic thingies. Not like in Long John Silver’s day when a bloke had to whittle his own from a lump of driftwood or go out in the dark nasty woods to lob a branch off a tree and risk getting another leg bitten off by wolves.”
“Oh well, I suppose we should look on the brighter side of things as if these benefit-cuts related suicides continue at the same geometric rate then the disabled welfare payment paradox will become self-solving and of great assistance to the UN’s proposed Agenda 21 mass euthanasia cull of all the human race’s deadwood.”
“Now I know that comment’s going to cop for a barrage of flack from human rights and wrongs groups but just wait until the NHS start with their scaremongering family planning propaganda next week - with bloody big posters and ad’s on the telly promoting their ‘Abortion’s safer than giving birth’ campaign.”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Sunday, 29 January 2012
Jubilee Woods Planting Marred by Hypocrisy
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The Ministry for Wasting Time & Money – working in conjunction with the House of Conman’s Committee for What Can We Fuck with Next - are organising a hare-brained scheme to create a series of new micro forests to commemorate the Queen's Diamond Jubilee and hope to hack their way through the frozen sod to plant one zillion trees during the seasonally-incorrect month of February.
Recruited into involuntary participation, Ms Candida Mingerot of the Woodland Trust informed one press hack from the Firewood Gazette that “Next month marks the 60th anniversary of the Queen's accession to the throne, hence some stupid tosser with as much knowledge about tree planting as an Eskimo has thrown good advice to the four winds and mandated February as Plant-a-Tree for Lizzie month."
"So now we’ve been lumbered with a warehouse full of free planting flat packs to be made available to any bugger and their dog that gets bored with watching the telly and wants to go out and freeze their proverbial bollocks off by taking part in this fatally-flawed effort to achieve a goal of planting six million trees during the jubilee year."
The centrepiece of the government scheme, dubiously backed by Oscar-winning actress Dame Judi Stench, will be Doggers Wood - a 460-acre secluded site in stockbroker belt Snobshire that is scheduled to become home to 500,000 trees and a legion of shrubs and bushes.
Further to creating the flagship arbourial delight, the project also plans to establish hundreds of similar Doggers Woods around the UK – right up to the Caledonian apartheid barrier of Hadrian’s Wall – with each covering more than 60 acres.
Community groups can apply for planter packs of 105 or 420 native species, with each pack containing several Sequoias and Giant Redwoods plus a "Royal Oak" sapling, grown from acorns collected on Royal estates and sprouted in a biodegradable bag of equally-royal red squirrel shit.
Dogging enthusiast group packs will contain 60 hedge/copse species as well as that al fresco sex voyeur’s hideaway favourite – Peeping Tom Rhododendron.
Conversely the scheme has come in for lashings of criticism, with the Tory-dominated coalition government being accused of gross hypocrisy for taking on an impossible balancing act. On the one hand maintaining their ‘Global Warming / Climate Change / Greener than Green / Save the Planet charade – while on the other keeping their mega-bucks property developer donors and bankster investors happy – by turning over thousands of acres of greenfield countryside for scabby housing projects to the profit-motivated environmental pillagers building homes for the zillions of the EUSSR’s economic refugees flooding into Broken Britain to get a foot on the welfare benefits ladder.
And who do we have to blame and point the fickle finger of fate at for expediting these duplicitous acts? Why none other than Local Government Minister Eric ‘Slimmers World’ Pickles and the ginger-mingin Defra Secretary Caroline ‘Nannygate’ Spelman.
Ms Spelman, the Desperate Dan-chinned Tory MP for the West Skidlands constituency of Landfill Hamlets has been covertly flogging off the arboreous acres of our once sceptred isle for firewood to unscrupulous commercial interests who don’t give a flying fuck about the state of the environment as long as they cut a profit and cop for their annual mega-bucks bonuses.
These include the notorious Sahara Forest Timber Corp – not quite renown for their ‘Earth-friendly’ contributions to Mother Nature – and a company fronted by Accenture – the largest management consultants in the known Universe - where the ranga Spelman’s husband Mork just happens to be a partner. Hmmm, obviously no conflict of interest there then, eh.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and/or squirrel shit.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
The Ministry for Wasting Time & Money – working in conjunction with the House of Conman’s Committee for What Can We Fuck with Next - are organising a hare-brained scheme to create a series of new micro forests to commemorate the Queen's Diamond Jubilee and hope to hack their way through the frozen sod to plant one zillion trees during the seasonally-incorrect month of February.
Recruited into involuntary participation, Ms Candida Mingerot of the Woodland Trust informed one press hack from the Firewood Gazette that “Next month marks the 60th anniversary of the Queen's accession to the throne, hence some stupid tosser with as much knowledge about tree planting as an Eskimo has thrown good advice to the four winds and mandated February as Plant-a-Tree for Lizzie month."
"So now we’ve been lumbered with a warehouse full of free planting flat packs to be made available to any bugger and their dog that gets bored with watching the telly and wants to go out and freeze their proverbial bollocks off by taking part in this fatally-flawed effort to achieve a goal of planting six million trees during the jubilee year."
The centrepiece of the government scheme, dubiously backed by Oscar-winning actress Dame Judi Stench, will be Doggers Wood - a 460-acre secluded site in stockbroker belt Snobshire that is scheduled to become home to 500,000 trees and a legion of shrubs and bushes.
Further to creating the flagship arbourial delight, the project also plans to establish hundreds of similar Doggers Woods around the UK – right up to the Caledonian apartheid barrier of Hadrian’s Wall – with each covering more than 60 acres.
Community groups can apply for planter packs of 105 or 420 native species, with each pack containing several Sequoias and Giant Redwoods plus a "Royal Oak" sapling, grown from acorns collected on Royal estates and sprouted in a biodegradable bag of equally-royal red squirrel shit.
Dogging enthusiast group packs will contain 60 hedge/copse species as well as that al fresco sex voyeur’s hideaway favourite – Peeping Tom Rhododendron.
Conversely the scheme has come in for lashings of criticism, with the Tory-dominated coalition government being accused of gross hypocrisy for taking on an impossible balancing act. On the one hand maintaining their ‘Global Warming / Climate Change / Greener than Green / Save the Planet charade – while on the other keeping their mega-bucks property developer donors and bankster investors happy – by turning over thousands of acres of greenfield countryside for scabby housing projects to the profit-motivated environmental pillagers building homes for the zillions of the EUSSR’s economic refugees flooding into Broken Britain to get a foot on the welfare benefits ladder.
And who do we have to blame and point the fickle finger of fate at for expediting these duplicitous acts? Why none other than Local Government Minister Eric ‘Slimmers World’ Pickles and the ginger-mingin Defra Secretary Caroline ‘Nannygate’ Spelman.
Ms Spelman, the Desperate Dan-chinned Tory MP for the West Skidlands constituency of Landfill Hamlets has been covertly flogging off the arboreous acres of our once sceptred isle for firewood to unscrupulous commercial interests who don’t give a flying fuck about the state of the environment as long as they cut a profit and cop for their annual mega-bucks bonuses.
These include the notorious Sahara Forest Timber Corp – not quite renown for their ‘Earth-friendly’ contributions to Mother Nature – and a company fronted by Accenture – the largest management consultants in the known Universe - where the ranga Spelman’s husband Mork just happens to be a partner. Hmmm, obviously no conflict of interest there then, eh.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and/or squirrel shit.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Saturday, 28 January 2012
UK Jobcentres to Push Prostitution
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
In a grasping at straws desperate attempt to arrest the geometric rate of escalation in Broken Britain’s unemployment statistics, the inept Works & Pensions Minister Iain Duncan Smith has announced he intends to take a leaf out of Germany’s jobseeking handbook where, under the numpty Kraut’s 2009 welfare reform’s ‘Fuck or Starve Bill’ women up to the age of 65 who’ve been out of work for more than a year can be forced to take any available job – including a vacancy in the sex industry – or lose their unemployment benefits.
Duncan Smith informed one press hack from the Skivers Gazette that “It’s a spiffing idea that came to me in a divine flash while giving the cat an enema last weekend - like some latter day Pauline epiphany - so I’ll be pushing a bill in the House of Conmans this coming week for the legalisation of prostitution and brothels. Then at least we can get legions of unemployed women off the books and back into work again.”
“And what a boost to the Chancellor Osborne’s coffers and the economy in general that will be – and all in time for the Queen’s jubilee in June and the 2012 Olympic Games fortnight.”
“Seriously, there’s going to be several million tourists visiting Broken Britain for these events – with Wimbledon falling right in the middle too – so as the Met’ Office is counting on a real sunshine summer, with everyone getting a bit frisky and fancying a quick shag, then what better than to have several strategically positioned knocking shops around the Marshgate Lane Olympic stadium with plenty of pimps on hand to drum up business and point punters in the right direction.”
“We can always add a few ‘Adult Entertainment’ direction signs for the benefit of tourists as there’s nothing worse than being in a strange city and trying to find a whore house. I know the problems we ran into last year when holding our Tory Party conference in Manchester and going out on the razzle of a night-time – then ending up in the Gay Village on Canal Street – which is okay if you’re ex-public school like half the cabinet and into poking blokes up the bum, I suppose.”
“But for Christ’s sake don’t mention any of this to Betsy, she’s go bonkers-ballistic and have my balls hung on the wind chimes if she even suspected I’d been blowing my spends on three-hole Mancunian strumpets - or getting a blow job off a poofter.”
“The Jobcentre Plus exec’s mentioned in the past of having women on the books that possess no skills whatsoever and plead they’ll do any job rather than go onto the soul-destroying Stage 4 scheme – so here’s their chance. No real work ‘sexperience’ required for lying on their back with their legs wide apart – or kneeling there for a pillow-biting doggy style session, so I reckon we’re going to have women queuing up to be flogging their golly to the Olympics tourists.”
“Okay, I realise the feminist lobbies and Good Samaritan moralists – and the bloody Church - are going to be kicking up a stink over this proposal but it’s one route of getting our unemployed girls back into the work ethic. And may I remind you that whores from all over the EUSSR are going to be descending on London in veritable droves to start flogging their erotic talents come the Jubilee and Olympics – so we’ve got to provide any of Britain’s Slut Club who are game with a chance to get on the ‘game’, so to speak.”
Conversely Bev ‘Snowball’ Titwank, an unemployed 16-year old mother of three from Greater Manchester’s Stench Hill sink or swim council housing estate, told press hacks that “Is this twat Duncan Smith off his effin’ head or what? Legalised brothels my arse. Who the fuck wants an official set-up an’ all kinds of government NHS health checks fer Gallopin’ Mingerot an’ HSE rules an’ statutes about fetish play an’ BD/SM games – or havin’ a quickie knee trembler in a pub car park.”
“Whatever, but me an’ me mate Feral Beryl woz talkin’ last night an’ we reckon the next effin’ thing they’ll want ter do is start regulatin’ our phone line sex calls an’ have us payin’ taxes – then they’ll stop our benefits too like they’re threatenin’ ter cap ‘em off at £26,000 quid a year wot really sucks cos that’s wot pays fer the little extras fer the kids – like food an’ clothes an’ all that kind of shit. This is one profession we don’t want regulatin’ by the effin’ government or they’ll make a total fuck of it the same as wiv everythin’ else they put their hands on. Just keep it illegal an’ we’ll keep payin’ off the Plod Squad an' PC Cyclops ter turn a blind eye.”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/germany/1482371/If-you-dont-take-a-job-as-a-prostitute-we-can-stop-your-benefits.html
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
In a grasping at straws desperate attempt to arrest the geometric rate of escalation in Broken Britain’s unemployment statistics, the inept Works & Pensions Minister Iain Duncan Smith has announced he intends to take a leaf out of Germany’s jobseeking handbook where, under the numpty Kraut’s 2009 welfare reform’s ‘Fuck or Starve Bill’ women up to the age of 65 who’ve been out of work for more than a year can be forced to take any available job – including a vacancy in the sex industry – or lose their unemployment benefits.
Duncan Smith informed one press hack from the Skivers Gazette that “It’s a spiffing idea that came to me in a divine flash while giving the cat an enema last weekend - like some latter day Pauline epiphany - so I’ll be pushing a bill in the House of Conmans this coming week for the legalisation of prostitution and brothels. Then at least we can get legions of unemployed women off the books and back into work again.”
“And what a boost to the Chancellor Osborne’s coffers and the economy in general that will be – and all in time for the Queen’s jubilee in June and the 2012 Olympic Games fortnight.”
“Seriously, there’s going to be several million tourists visiting Broken Britain for these events – with Wimbledon falling right in the middle too – so as the Met’ Office is counting on a real sunshine summer, with everyone getting a bit frisky and fancying a quick shag, then what better than to have several strategically positioned knocking shops around the Marshgate Lane Olympic stadium with plenty of pimps on hand to drum up business and point punters in the right direction.”
“We can always add a few ‘Adult Entertainment’ direction signs for the benefit of tourists as there’s nothing worse than being in a strange city and trying to find a whore house. I know the problems we ran into last year when holding our Tory Party conference in Manchester and going out on the razzle of a night-time – then ending up in the Gay Village on Canal Street – which is okay if you’re ex-public school like half the cabinet and into poking blokes up the bum, I suppose.”
“But for Christ’s sake don’t mention any of this to Betsy, she’s go bonkers-ballistic and have my balls hung on the wind chimes if she even suspected I’d been blowing my spends on three-hole Mancunian strumpets - or getting a blow job off a poofter.”
“The Jobcentre Plus exec’s mentioned in the past of having women on the books that possess no skills whatsoever and plead they’ll do any job rather than go onto the soul-destroying Stage 4 scheme – so here’s their chance. No real work ‘sexperience’ required for lying on their back with their legs wide apart – or kneeling there for a pillow-biting doggy style session, so I reckon we’re going to have women queuing up to be flogging their golly to the Olympics tourists.”
“Okay, I realise the feminist lobbies and Good Samaritan moralists – and the bloody Church - are going to be kicking up a stink over this proposal but it’s one route of getting our unemployed girls back into the work ethic. And may I remind you that whores from all over the EUSSR are going to be descending on London in veritable droves to start flogging their erotic talents come the Jubilee and Olympics – so we’ve got to provide any of Britain’s Slut Club who are game with a chance to get on the ‘game’, so to speak.”
Conversely Bev ‘Snowball’ Titwank, an unemployed 16-year old mother of three from Greater Manchester’s Stench Hill sink or swim council housing estate, told press hacks that “Is this twat Duncan Smith off his effin’ head or what? Legalised brothels my arse. Who the fuck wants an official set-up an’ all kinds of government NHS health checks fer Gallopin’ Mingerot an’ HSE rules an’ statutes about fetish play an’ BD/SM games – or havin’ a quickie knee trembler in a pub car park.”
“Whatever, but me an’ me mate Feral Beryl woz talkin’ last night an’ we reckon the next effin’ thing they’ll want ter do is start regulatin’ our phone line sex calls an’ have us payin’ taxes – then they’ll stop our benefits too like they’re threatenin’ ter cap ‘em off at £26,000 quid a year wot really sucks cos that’s wot pays fer the little extras fer the kids – like food an’ clothes an’ all that kind of shit. This is one profession we don’t want regulatin’ by the effin’ government or they’ll make a total fuck of it the same as wiv everythin’ else they put their hands on. Just keep it illegal an’ we’ll keep payin’ off the Plod Squad an' PC Cyclops ter turn a blind eye.”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/germany/1482371/If-you-dont-take-a-job-as-a-prostitute-we-can-stop-your-benefits.html
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Friday, 27 January 2012
ZioNazi Mafia Funding Gingrich Campaign
In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
So, the Republican candidate squabble for the GOP Presidential bid continues, albeit with a depleted line up of contestants willing to keep up the fantasy ‘war on terror’, further demonise Islam and bomb Iran back to the Stone Age - if they can only get their arses into the coveted Oval Office slot.
Apart from the only upright – and sane – bloke amongst the shower of shits – Ron Paul - what a bunch of dog wankers and tosspots they are – and all suffering from the ego surpasses intellect syndrome. 300 million Yanks to choose from and this is the best they can do?
Oh well, it’s all the Rothshite crime syndicate need to implement and discharge their Israel First and New World Order agendas – with Tel Aviv deciding US foreign policy to suit their advantage.
Any doubts, just think back to the last clot – Dubya Bush – now you couldn’t find a more stupid prick to be President if you tried – although he did have a genuine US birth certificate – and a Texan social security number – unlike the Kenyan cuckoo squatting in the White House right now – Mista Hope n Change. The Teleprompter Man
So, while Ron Paul’s chances are stricken by the fact he comes across as an honest bloke – the only one capable of intelligence, independent thinking and possessed with common sense out of the septic bunch - hence has as much chance of being selected as of Obama admitting he’s an impostor - at least the more lunatic fringe have now been eliminated. Specifically the batshit bonkers Michelle Bachmann; the equally dingbat Herman Cain; Rick Perry; Jon Huntsman and Cruddy Roemer.
Thus we’re left with the three likely lads: Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, and the graft and corruption-ridden witless wonder from Pennsylvania - ‘Rabid Rick’ Santorum - all stigmatised by AIPAC’s Four B’s Doctrine: Bribery, Blackmail, Bludgeons and Bodybags. Ah well, any one of them is up to doing the job – obeying the Rothshite crime syndicate’s orders – with a spot of ego-massaging and a few dollars thrown in. A Nobel Peace Prize, perhaps.
But a peek behind the polls, with the kikesters in control of the primaries’ vote count, indicates that ‘The Grinch’ is the boy the Ashkenazi Jews of convenience want in the White House.
Newton Leroy Gingrich - the type of person who intuitively prompts you to count your fingers after shaking hands with him. Another of the good ole US of A’s jukebox politicians – and they’ve got a Senate and Congress full of them - stick a few coins in and Newt will play any tune his Masters want – such as “What Palestinian question? The Palestinians don’t exist – they’re just a figment of some fucker’s warped imagination. God bless Israel. Israel forever.”
Yep, Newt’s the guy to push the implementation of the ‘Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act’ and the ‘National Defence Authorization Act’ to fruition – and clear out the Occupy 99% scum from their anti-capitalist squats and fill the FEMA camps like Auschwitz Birkenau and Bergen-Belsen.
If the Israeli psychos want to attack Iran then Newt’s just the man to have in the Oval Office to okay US support – and pre-emptive strike participation.
But Newt’s high on family values too – as evidenced recently by using the daughters from his first marriage to Jackie Battley to convince the media - and thus the public - that Marianne Githner, his wife from the second fubar marriage, is lying about the third wife - Callista ‘Blonde Moment’ Bisek.
Let’s not forget the character of this scumbag that AIPAC are pushing for the top job – who visited first spouse Jackie in hospital following her cancer surgery – to inform her he was shacking up with Marianne and wanted a divorce. Nice bloke.
No shit, Newt might as well be a shifty Shylock himself, doling out chutzpah of that audacious calibre.
So, who’s just bunged a big wad into the funding kitty for the Grinch’s campaign, might we ask? None other than the zillionaire kikester Sheldon ‘Monkey Boy’ Adelson – Nevada’s notorious kiddie fiddling poison dwarf cum Las Vegas casino owner cum Rothshite crime syndicate gopher.
Shifty Sheldon’s in tight with Israeli PM Bobo Nuttyahoo, and reputed to be a faithful ‘sayan’ and paymaster for Mossad’s US ‘Kidon’ hit squads, A sponsor of Israeli art students. Thick as thieves (sic) with WTC owner Larry Silverslime – and a founding member of Las Vegas’ St Shylock’s Synagogue for Latter Day Hi-Fivers.
Doubtless the Grinch and Shorty Adelson have a lot in common, as if either of them dropped dead there would be no need to dig a grave due the fact both are so bent the undertakers could simply wind them into the cemetery sod like a couple of corkscrews.
For the record, following in the footsteps of fellow kikester Meyer Lansky, Adelson purchased the Sands Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas (the former hangout of Frank Sinatra and the notorious Twat Pack) as the main vehicle of choice for laundering their crime syndicate earnings – and now, with his Chinese Black Dragon Society partner Stan Ho, owns the Cotai Landfill Casino Resort in Macau – an artificial island constructed entirely out of cast-off betting slips, knotted condoms, chewed beer mats, aborted foetuses and the mutilated bodies of no-pay losers snuffed by the Big Nose Tong.
Oh yes, just like Tel Aviv, if Beijing has a problem with US foreign policy, Adelson is the man they call – who is straight on the phone to his stooges in Congress – such as convicted criminal Tom DeLay. So if Newt gets into the White House, the US of A will be run by the Knesset – even more so than it is already.
Thought for the day. Within the Oxford English Dictionary’s indexed lexicon of 750,000-plus words there is none that accurately describes Newt Gingrich or his pathetic human condition - however it has been unanimously agreed by a conclave / synod of Democrats that the word CUNT comes pretty close.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a ZioNazi-infested area and may contain traces of apartheid, lunacy and galloping racism.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
So, the Republican candidate squabble for the GOP Presidential bid continues, albeit with a depleted line up of contestants willing to keep up the fantasy ‘war on terror’, further demonise Islam and bomb Iran back to the Stone Age - if they can only get their arses into the coveted Oval Office slot.
Apart from the only upright – and sane – bloke amongst the shower of shits – Ron Paul - what a bunch of dog wankers and tosspots they are – and all suffering from the ego surpasses intellect syndrome. 300 million Yanks to choose from and this is the best they can do?
Oh well, it’s all the Rothshite crime syndicate need to implement and discharge their Israel First and New World Order agendas – with Tel Aviv deciding US foreign policy to suit their advantage.
Any doubts, just think back to the last clot – Dubya Bush – now you couldn’t find a more stupid prick to be President if you tried – although he did have a genuine US birth certificate – and a Texan social security number – unlike the Kenyan cuckoo squatting in the White House right now – Mista Hope n Change. The Teleprompter Man
So, while Ron Paul’s chances are stricken by the fact he comes across as an honest bloke – the only one capable of intelligence, independent thinking and possessed with common sense out of the septic bunch - hence has as much chance of being selected as of Obama admitting he’s an impostor - at least the more lunatic fringe have now been eliminated. Specifically the batshit bonkers Michelle Bachmann; the equally dingbat Herman Cain; Rick Perry; Jon Huntsman and Cruddy Roemer.
Thus we’re left with the three likely lads: Newt Gingrich, Mitt Romney, and the graft and corruption-ridden witless wonder from Pennsylvania - ‘Rabid Rick’ Santorum - all stigmatised by AIPAC’s Four B’s Doctrine: Bribery, Blackmail, Bludgeons and Bodybags. Ah well, any one of them is up to doing the job – obeying the Rothshite crime syndicate’s orders – with a spot of ego-massaging and a few dollars thrown in. A Nobel Peace Prize, perhaps.
But a peek behind the polls, with the kikesters in control of the primaries’ vote count, indicates that ‘The Grinch’ is the boy the Ashkenazi Jews of convenience want in the White House.
Newton Leroy Gingrich - the type of person who intuitively prompts you to count your fingers after shaking hands with him. Another of the good ole US of A’s jukebox politicians – and they’ve got a Senate and Congress full of them - stick a few coins in and Newt will play any tune his Masters want – such as “What Palestinian question? The Palestinians don’t exist – they’re just a figment of some fucker’s warped imagination. God bless Israel. Israel forever.”
Yep, Newt’s the guy to push the implementation of the ‘Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act’ and the ‘National Defence Authorization Act’ to fruition – and clear out the Occupy 99% scum from their anti-capitalist squats and fill the FEMA camps like Auschwitz Birkenau and Bergen-Belsen.
If the Israeli psychos want to attack Iran then Newt’s just the man to have in the Oval Office to okay US support – and pre-emptive strike participation.
But Newt’s high on family values too – as evidenced recently by using the daughters from his first marriage to Jackie Battley to convince the media - and thus the public - that Marianne Githner, his wife from the second fubar marriage, is lying about the third wife - Callista ‘Blonde Moment’ Bisek.
Let’s not forget the character of this scumbag that AIPAC are pushing for the top job – who visited first spouse Jackie in hospital following her cancer surgery – to inform her he was shacking up with Marianne and wanted a divorce. Nice bloke.
No shit, Newt might as well be a shifty Shylock himself, doling out chutzpah of that audacious calibre.
So, who’s just bunged a big wad into the funding kitty for the Grinch’s campaign, might we ask? None other than the zillionaire kikester Sheldon ‘Monkey Boy’ Adelson – Nevada’s notorious kiddie fiddling poison dwarf cum Las Vegas casino owner cum Rothshite crime syndicate gopher.
Shifty Sheldon’s in tight with Israeli PM Bobo Nuttyahoo, and reputed to be a faithful ‘sayan’ and paymaster for Mossad’s US ‘Kidon’ hit squads, A sponsor of Israeli art students. Thick as thieves (sic) with WTC owner Larry Silverslime – and a founding member of Las Vegas’ St Shylock’s Synagogue for Latter Day Hi-Fivers.
Doubtless the Grinch and Shorty Adelson have a lot in common, as if either of them dropped dead there would be no need to dig a grave due the fact both are so bent the undertakers could simply wind them into the cemetery sod like a couple of corkscrews.
For the record, following in the footsteps of fellow kikester Meyer Lansky, Adelson purchased the Sands Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas (the former hangout of Frank Sinatra and the notorious Twat Pack) as the main vehicle of choice for laundering their crime syndicate earnings – and now, with his Chinese Black Dragon Society partner Stan Ho, owns the Cotai Landfill Casino Resort in Macau – an artificial island constructed entirely out of cast-off betting slips, knotted condoms, chewed beer mats, aborted foetuses and the mutilated bodies of no-pay losers snuffed by the Big Nose Tong.
Oh yes, just like Tel Aviv, if Beijing has a problem with US foreign policy, Adelson is the man they call – who is straight on the phone to his stooges in Congress – such as convicted criminal Tom DeLay. So if Newt gets into the White House, the US of A will be run by the Knesset – even more so than it is already.
Thought for the day. Within the Oxford English Dictionary’s indexed lexicon of 750,000-plus words there is none that accurately describes Newt Gingrich or his pathetic human condition - however it has been unanimously agreed by a conclave / synod of Democrats that the word CUNT comes pretty close.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a ZioNazi-infested area and may contain traces of apartheid, lunacy and galloping racism.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Spurs Boss Pleads ‘Maybe Guilty’
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The Southwark Crown Court tax evasion trial of Tottenham Hotspur soccer club manager Harry ‘Bungo’ Redneck took a bizarre turn today when his defence counsel, Sue Fleecem QC, entered an ‘about-turn’ prevaricating ‘maybe a bit guilty’ plea of ‘extenuating circumstances’ concerning her client’s motivation and purpose in stashing hundreds of thousands of pounds in offshore tax havens and concealing cash bungs and bonuses via investments in racehorses and artworks.
Throwing embarrassment to the wind four winds in favour of self-preservation and making a blatant attempt to elicit the court’s empathy and compassion, Redneck now claims his ‘Rosie 47’ Happy Savers account in Monaco was set up covertly in his dog’s name not so much to blind-side HMRC out of taxable income levies but as a spot of ‘quantitative easing’ to finance a life-enhancing face lift cosmetic surgery procedure following the rupture of his PIP ‘Chubby Cheeks’ facial inserts, which resulted in seepage of a toxic cocktail of tyre inflator, silicon and Botox leaving him looking like Golem after a heavy night on the booze.
Presenting medical evidence to the court on behalf of the defence, Harley Street cosmetic surgery consultant Dr Fellattia van der Gamm confirmed the factual veracity of Redneck’s PIP inserts rupturing which apparently occurred through a self-harm habit of banging his head against the stands every time his team lost a match.
The Spurs manager was initially advised to undergo the facial poly prosthese implant procedure following his 2003 eyebag prolapse – a sub-dermal collagen deficiency syndrome condition manifested and aggravated due his addiction to the traditional Cockney diet of suet puddings and jellied eels.
Taking the stand to speak in his own defence, Redneck informed the court “Look at me kisser an’ these bloodhound jowls. It’s so embarassin’ when I go down me local boozer an’ all the lads are callin’ me ‘old chipmunk features’ an’ sayin’ I’ve got eyes like pissholes in the snow. It’s me own fault fer havin’ the implants done on the cheap at Achmed’s Botox Clinic in Brighton – so that’s why I woz stashin’ a few bob in the Rosie 47 account in Monaco – ter pay fer a proper facelift job at Dr. Fellattia’s clinic.”
Conversely, the Crown Prosecution Service legal team, headed by Sir Dinsdale Spatchcock QC, later proceeded to raise the issue of why a string of ‘bungs’ paid to Redneck by the-then Pompey Poofters FC owner - Serbian zillionaire Milan Mangosteen – whose fortune was founded on the ever-popular bar snack – Pikey Pete’s Roast Swan Scratchings – were invested in collections of pre-Columbian and Ming dynasty Tupperware – and the premier works of such modern day art masters Andy Wormhole and Jackson Pillock – plus the clandestine ownership of championship racehorses ‘Limping Larry’ and ‘Tosspot’.
The trial continues.
Are you of a mind to cheat HMRC at every opportunity? Does your dog have any secret offshore bank accounts? How about your cat? Is your art collection composed of old Masters or Poundland prints? How about racehorses – do you own shares in any dodgy donkeys?
Send your confession using the online reply form below and you could win one of HMRC’s Get Out of Jail Free cards – after our Renta-Thug collection bailiffs have paid you a visit.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
The Southwark Crown Court tax evasion trial of Tottenham Hotspur soccer club manager Harry ‘Bungo’ Redneck took a bizarre turn today when his defence counsel, Sue Fleecem QC, entered an ‘about-turn’ prevaricating ‘maybe a bit guilty’ plea of ‘extenuating circumstances’ concerning her client’s motivation and purpose in stashing hundreds of thousands of pounds in offshore tax havens and concealing cash bungs and bonuses via investments in racehorses and artworks.
Throwing embarrassment to the wind four winds in favour of self-preservation and making a blatant attempt to elicit the court’s empathy and compassion, Redneck now claims his ‘Rosie 47’ Happy Savers account in Monaco was set up covertly in his dog’s name not so much to blind-side HMRC out of taxable income levies but as a spot of ‘quantitative easing’ to finance a life-enhancing face lift cosmetic surgery procedure following the rupture of his PIP ‘Chubby Cheeks’ facial inserts, which resulted in seepage of a toxic cocktail of tyre inflator, silicon and Botox leaving him looking like Golem after a heavy night on the booze.
Presenting medical evidence to the court on behalf of the defence, Harley Street cosmetic surgery consultant Dr Fellattia van der Gamm confirmed the factual veracity of Redneck’s PIP inserts rupturing which apparently occurred through a self-harm habit of banging his head against the stands every time his team lost a match.
The Spurs manager was initially advised to undergo the facial poly prosthese implant procedure following his 2003 eyebag prolapse – a sub-dermal collagen deficiency syndrome condition manifested and aggravated due his addiction to the traditional Cockney diet of suet puddings and jellied eels.
Taking the stand to speak in his own defence, Redneck informed the court “Look at me kisser an’ these bloodhound jowls. It’s so embarassin’ when I go down me local boozer an’ all the lads are callin’ me ‘old chipmunk features’ an’ sayin’ I’ve got eyes like pissholes in the snow. It’s me own fault fer havin’ the implants done on the cheap at Achmed’s Botox Clinic in Brighton – so that’s why I woz stashin’ a few bob in the Rosie 47 account in Monaco – ter pay fer a proper facelift job at Dr. Fellattia’s clinic.”
Conversely, the Crown Prosecution Service legal team, headed by Sir Dinsdale Spatchcock QC, later proceeded to raise the issue of why a string of ‘bungs’ paid to Redneck by the-then Pompey Poofters FC owner - Serbian zillionaire Milan Mangosteen – whose fortune was founded on the ever-popular bar snack – Pikey Pete’s Roast Swan Scratchings – were invested in collections of pre-Columbian and Ming dynasty Tupperware – and the premier works of such modern day art masters Andy Wormhole and Jackson Pillock – plus the clandestine ownership of championship racehorses ‘Limping Larry’ and ‘Tosspot’.
The trial continues.
Are you of a mind to cheat HMRC at every opportunity? Does your dog have any secret offshore bank accounts? How about your cat? Is your art collection composed of old Masters or Poundland prints? How about racehorses – do you own shares in any dodgy donkeys?
Send your confession using the online reply form below and you could win one of HMRC’s Get Out of Jail Free cards – after our Renta-Thug collection bailiffs have paid you a visit.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Thursday, 26 January 2012
US Military Okays Murder of Civilians
In this morning’s ‘Justifiable Homicide’ enhanced bullshit edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The good ole US of A yesterday sent the Red Cross, Amnesty International and the Ox-Rat human rights and wrongs watchdogs into a collective state of convulsive apoplexy when a military court in California set the most scandalous and immoral precedent of the century concerning non-combatant Muslims in the Mid-East war zones - by sanctioning their gung-ho, trigger-happy psycho troops with the judicially-approved right to shoot first - then make excuses later – and all covered by a get out of jail free card.
The highly controversial decision by a Military Tribunal at Camp Bonkers stated that the US Marine, who admitted charges to his part in the cold-blooded slaughter of 24 unarmed Iraqi civilians in 2005, should face no time in detention for ‘spur-of-the-moment’ mistakes made during the heat of battle was, post-hearing, approved by General Billy Bob Warthog, CIC of the Marine Corps Forces Central Command.
The atrocious events that occurred in Iraq’s Haditha have been the subject of several official whitewash attempts and cover-ups, which unfortunately resulted in criminal charges eventually being filed against members of Psycho Company, 3rd Body Bag Battalion, 1st Marine Cannon Fodder Regiment – who were alleged to have gone on a homicidal rampage and carried out the killings as they were bored with watching porno on Sky’s Filth channel and guarding the Haditha Dam.
Marine Sgt Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher faced a maximum of three months imprisonment after admitting dereliction of duty and perjuriously claiming the civilian deaths occurred in the Operation Kill Every Fucker crackdown on the cottage industry IED factories in the area – which resulted in the massacre of women, children and elderly people - including a man in a wheelchair who was later identified as Old Achmed, a retired goat herder and not the notorious Al Qaeda bomber ‘Semtex’ Shaheed bin Ka-Boom.
McGnasher was one of eight marines arrested over the killings, with the charges against five of the group being dropped or dismissed, and one acquitted on the grounds of diminished responsibility due suffering from pre-menstrual tension – with Sgt Sanick Dela Ratfink granted immunity in exchange for snitching on his fellow psychopaths and giving evidence to the court.
Military judge Lt Col Sheldon Scumberger informed one press hack from the Ethnic Cleansing Gazette that “My hands had been tied by the terms of the plea agreement that were ratified by the Pentagon - as everyone had grassed each other up – apart from Sgt McGnasher. But, Goddamn, what do these heathens expect when they go hiding their weapons of mass distraction so we can't find them and making us look dumb - - of course we’re gonna play rough.”
“Hellfire, I don’t know what the big deal is all about - the victims would have all been dead six months down the road anyways from all the toxic depleted uranium dust poisoning them.”
One survivor of Operation Kill Every Fucker was Awis ibn Himar, a former wheelbarrow mechanic, who suffered minor bullet wounds and opined to a reporter from the Flimflam Gazette "I was expecting that the American judiciary would sentence these murderers to life in prison so they might be sodomised by their macho cellmates and suck cock until they choked and descended into Jahannum (Hell) to be the catamites of Iblis (the Devil) for all eternity.”
“We expected the Kenyan Obama to appear on the telly to confess in front of the whole world the guilt of their soldiers in committing these crimes – and then the Great Satan America would show itself as democratic and fair."
Hmmm, some chance of that happening. Ah well, Awis - that’s what Dante’s Ninth Circle of Hell is reserved for – real class-act scumbags.
Thought for the day. Fuck the Great Satan and their ZioNazi New World Order.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
The good ole US of A yesterday sent the Red Cross, Amnesty International and the Ox-Rat human rights and wrongs watchdogs into a collective state of convulsive apoplexy when a military court in California set the most scandalous and immoral precedent of the century concerning non-combatant Muslims in the Mid-East war zones - by sanctioning their gung-ho, trigger-happy psycho troops with the judicially-approved right to shoot first - then make excuses later – and all covered by a get out of jail free card.
The highly controversial decision by a Military Tribunal at Camp Bonkers stated that the US Marine, who admitted charges to his part in the cold-blooded slaughter of 24 unarmed Iraqi civilians in 2005, should face no time in detention for ‘spur-of-the-moment’ mistakes made during the heat of battle was, post-hearing, approved by General Billy Bob Warthog, CIC of the Marine Corps Forces Central Command.
The atrocious events that occurred in Iraq’s Haditha have been the subject of several official whitewash attempts and cover-ups, which unfortunately resulted in criminal charges eventually being filed against members of Psycho Company, 3rd Body Bag Battalion, 1st Marine Cannon Fodder Regiment – who were alleged to have gone on a homicidal rampage and carried out the killings as they were bored with watching porno on Sky’s Filth channel and guarding the Haditha Dam.
Marine Sgt Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher faced a maximum of three months imprisonment after admitting dereliction of duty and perjuriously claiming the civilian deaths occurred in the Operation Kill Every Fucker crackdown on the cottage industry IED factories in the area – which resulted in the massacre of women, children and elderly people - including a man in a wheelchair who was later identified as Old Achmed, a retired goat herder and not the notorious Al Qaeda bomber ‘Semtex’ Shaheed bin Ka-Boom.
McGnasher was one of eight marines arrested over the killings, with the charges against five of the group being dropped or dismissed, and one acquitted on the grounds of diminished responsibility due suffering from pre-menstrual tension – with Sgt Sanick Dela Ratfink granted immunity in exchange for snitching on his fellow psychopaths and giving evidence to the court.
Military judge Lt Col Sheldon Scumberger informed one press hack from the Ethnic Cleansing Gazette that “My hands had been tied by the terms of the plea agreement that were ratified by the Pentagon - as everyone had grassed each other up – apart from Sgt McGnasher. But, Goddamn, what do these heathens expect when they go hiding their weapons of mass distraction so we can't find them and making us look dumb - - of course we’re gonna play rough.”
“Hellfire, I don’t know what the big deal is all about - the victims would have all been dead six months down the road anyways from all the toxic depleted uranium dust poisoning them.”
One survivor of Operation Kill Every Fucker was Awis ibn Himar, a former wheelbarrow mechanic, who suffered minor bullet wounds and opined to a reporter from the Flimflam Gazette "I was expecting that the American judiciary would sentence these murderers to life in prison so they might be sodomised by their macho cellmates and suck cock until they choked and descended into Jahannum (Hell) to be the catamites of Iblis (the Devil) for all eternity.”
“We expected the Kenyan Obama to appear on the telly to confess in front of the whole world the guilt of their soldiers in committing these crimes – and then the Great Satan America would show itself as democratic and fair."
Hmmm, some chance of that happening. Ah well, Awis - that’s what Dante’s Ninth Circle of Hell is reserved for – real class-act scumbags.
Thought for the day. Fuck the Great Satan and their ZioNazi New World Order.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Wednesday, 25 January 2012
Zulu King Disses Darkie Fudgers
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Ms Mingeeter Dildodo, the director of South Africa's Human Rights & Wrongs Commission, today informed one press hack from the Homophobes Gazette they were investigating reports that the Zulu monarch of Bongawongaland, King Goodbye Chuckabutty, had breached diplomatic etiquette and the established rules of political correctness during one of his recent hate speeches by referring to male gays as a bunch of ‘shit-stabbing sodomites’ – and the worshippers of Sappho as lesbo rug-munchers who needed of a spot of corrective rape.
The Zulu King was speaking to an audience of thousands of his perma-sun-tanned subjects at the 133rd anniversary of the Battle of Isandlwana - a famous 19th Century Zulu victory over British troops – stating for the media record “In de spirit of Shaka, we sure did kick some honky white ass dat day” – a comment dismissed by the British Foreign Office as simply “Oh well, one can’t educate pork – hence the best we can expect from a pig is a grunt.”
While South Africa's constitution specifically forbids discrimination on the grounds of sexual orientation - homophobia is widespread, and next to jaywalking, shop-lifting and identity theft – a major national pastime – with members of the gay community often found gutted and strangled with their own intestines – and a large cassava root jammed up their back passage.
The Western-educated monarch fittingly attended Oxford University’s 'Kings College' where he graduated summa cum laude in Assegai Chucking and earned a coveted ‘Blue’ for Crocodile Wrestling and won the coveted Golden Coconut Award – before returning to rule South Africa’s Bongawongaland with a homophobic iron fist – copy-catting his role models Robert Rhubarbie in the Marxist Utopia of Zimbabwe and Katgotchatongue Musaveni, the batshit bonkers president of Uganda – both of whom have declared playing the beast with two backs a capital offence – along with the dingbat rulers of Malawi, Wormhole Jaffacake - and Kenya’s Twatcha N’kunta.
As to the Zulu King’s homophobic remarks, he rebuked media reporters with his stock response of “Dese people dey am an abomination – dat’s wot de Bible tells us when it condemns men stickin’ dere willy up de bum of another man. St Paul of Tarsus, he done rebuke de unnatural relations of de ‘arsenokoitēs’. Jest ya read de Leviticus 18 an’ 20 wot puts a blanket prohibition on men shaggin’ each other.”
“What is wrong wid dese guys dat dey don’t like pussy? Den ya got de problem wid de lesbians wot is possessed wid dese shameful lusts an’ seems ta like pussy too much when dey meant ta be lookin’ after cock – cos lookin’ after pussy is de man’s job.”
King Chuckabutty, a devout Roman Catholic since being converted away from the evils of pagan worship and cannibalism last year, has been the target of severe censure from foreign human rights and feminist groups around the globe due his predilection for paedophilia in maintaining a polygamous harem of hundreds of pubescent ‘wives and concubines’ - criticism of which in the past has met with the caustic and vulgar rejoinder of “Hey, if dey is old enough ta bleed den dey is old enough ta butcher!”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Ms Mingeeter Dildodo, the director of South Africa's Human Rights & Wrongs Commission, today informed one press hack from the Homophobes Gazette they were investigating reports that the Zulu monarch of Bongawongaland, King Goodbye Chuckabutty, had breached diplomatic etiquette and the established rules of political correctness during one of his recent hate speeches by referring to male gays as a bunch of ‘shit-stabbing sodomites’ – and the worshippers of Sappho as lesbo rug-munchers who needed of a spot of corrective rape.
The Zulu King was speaking to an audience of thousands of his perma-sun-tanned subjects at the 133rd anniversary of the Battle of Isandlwana - a famous 19th Century Zulu victory over British troops – stating for the media record “In de spirit of Shaka, we sure did kick some honky white ass dat day” – a comment dismissed by the British Foreign Office as simply “Oh well, one can’t educate pork – hence the best we can expect from a pig is a grunt.”
While South Africa's constitution specifically forbids discrimination on the grounds of sexual orientation - homophobia is widespread, and next to jaywalking, shop-lifting and identity theft – a major national pastime – with members of the gay community often found gutted and strangled with their own intestines – and a large cassava root jammed up their back passage.
The Western-educated monarch fittingly attended Oxford University’s 'Kings College' where he graduated summa cum laude in Assegai Chucking and earned a coveted ‘Blue’ for Crocodile Wrestling and won the coveted Golden Coconut Award – before returning to rule South Africa’s Bongawongaland with a homophobic iron fist – copy-catting his role models Robert Rhubarbie in the Marxist Utopia of Zimbabwe and Katgotchatongue Musaveni, the batshit bonkers president of Uganda – both of whom have declared playing the beast with two backs a capital offence – along with the dingbat rulers of Malawi, Wormhole Jaffacake - and Kenya’s Twatcha N’kunta.
As to the Zulu King’s homophobic remarks, he rebuked media reporters with his stock response of “Dese people dey am an abomination – dat’s wot de Bible tells us when it condemns men stickin’ dere willy up de bum of another man. St Paul of Tarsus, he done rebuke de unnatural relations of de ‘arsenokoitēs’. Jest ya read de Leviticus 18 an’ 20 wot puts a blanket prohibition on men shaggin’ each other.”
“What is wrong wid dese guys dat dey don’t like pussy? Den ya got de problem wid de lesbians wot is possessed wid dese shameful lusts an’ seems ta like pussy too much when dey meant ta be lookin’ after cock – cos lookin’ after pussy is de man’s job.”
King Chuckabutty, a devout Roman Catholic since being converted away from the evils of pagan worship and cannibalism last year, has been the target of severe censure from foreign human rights and feminist groups around the globe due his predilection for paedophilia in maintaining a polygamous harem of hundreds of pubescent ‘wives and concubines’ - criticism of which in the past has met with the caustic and vulgar rejoinder of “Hey, if dey is old enough ta bleed den dey is old enough ta butcher!”
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
UK Debt Passes 1 Zillion Quid Mark
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Ms Candida Mingerot, the UK Treasury’s media secretary, yesterday announced to a gaggle of highly amused press hacks that the UK’s national debt has now passed the one trillion pounds 'beyond a joke' mark – a figure referred to by banksters as ‘lots and lots of money’ – but that in her unqualified opinion this factor simply served to emphasise the incompetence of New Labour’s successive dynamic duo of ‘Scottish’ Chancellors of the Exchequer - Gordon Brown and Alastair Darling – and the unsustainable level of spending they racked up during 13 years of playing Russian roulette with the national economy.
Conversely, this horrifying debt figure besides, the incumbent Tory Chancellor George Osborne claims financial initiatives are still on course to hit his borrowing target for the financial year of a mere £127 billion quid. Que? WTF!? How fucking much? No wonder Britain’s ‘Broken’ with a large capital B - and we’re worried about a bit of personal credit card debt from the Christmas spend or running up a £50 nicker overdraft at the bank.
Why the fuck does Osborne need to borrow £127 billion quid, we’d like to know, considering every expense and outgoing in the country’s been slashed – apart from his jugular - yet.
So we’re bollocks deep in a Debtocracy quagmire. No problems - all too easy to solve if we’re determined to get jingoistic about this.
First off we need to stop kissing the Great Satan’s arse and letting the Rothshite crime syndicate and Tel Aviv set the UK’s foreign policy agenda – and hence defer from getting involved in further overseas military misadventures.
Next on the list, call a halt to handing out the taxpayers’ cash to scrounging Third World dumps – especially those whose ruling scumbag oligarchs have more money than Croesus.
If Alex ‘Three Chins’ Salmond and his Scottish SNP-dominated Parliament want independence, it’s all easy-peasy, no referendum required – just fuck off and shut the gates on Hadrian’s Wall as you pass Go. Bye-bye British Navy bases and shipyard orders – and the BBC – and the NHS – and the Royal Mail. Plus stick the Arbroath ‘smokies’ and the bagpipes.
Oh, and don’t forget the multi-billions your Royal Bank of Scumland owes the ‘English’ taxpayers’ purse.
Then put a stop to paying welfare payments out to EUSSR migrant scroungers – and call a referendum – not a repeat of Posh Dave Scameron’s disingenuous promised ‘Never-Endum’ - on continued EUSSR membership and let’s shitcan our connections with the kleptocracy in Brussels immediately – if not sooner – and hoof out all the European minimum wage donkeys, pseudo-plumbers and swan-roasting Albanian pikeys - and free up the UK’s job market again. Hmmm, keeping Brussels’ sticky fingers out of the taxpayers’ coffers will soon up the ante.
As Posh Dave Scameron’s ‘Big Society’ volunteer project has as much chance of success as shoving butter up a porcupine’s arse with a red hot knitting needle as it doesn’t pay anything – and the Department of Works and Pensions scheme to make it mandatory for all unemployed peasants cursed with the Jobcentre’s Stage 4 stigmata to take an NVQ1 Chartered Skip Scavvy course is likewise doomed to failure – why the fuck don’t we toss political correctness to the four winds and hoof out all the European minimum wage donkeys and pseudo-plumbers and swan-roasting Albanian pikeys with their forged qualifications from the University of Make Believe - and free up the UK’s job market again.
Next on this drastic agenda – re-industrialise and start self-financing British skills and manufacturing. Outlaw ‘outsourcing’; railroad a bill through Parliament disenfranchising all ‘Quangos’ – then present the House of Conmans MPs with a salary cut. If the unemployed are supposed to survive on £60-odd quid a week and pensioners on £102 quid then they can take a cut in their £64,766 nicker per annum – plus expenses.
So, how about those for a set of instant fiscal reforms? And all without a qualification in economics - much the same as the clots who got Britain into this mess in the first place – Thatcher, Major, Bliar and Scameron.
Thought for the day. Well at least Britain’s not as fucked up as the good ole U.S. of A with its $16 trillion dollar overdraft. Who fancies paying the interest on that one? Jesus, God rest His soul, had the right idea with the usurious money lenders – shut the shifty Shylocks’ operations right down.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Ms Candida Mingerot, the UK Treasury’s media secretary, yesterday announced to a gaggle of highly amused press hacks that the UK’s national debt has now passed the one trillion pounds 'beyond a joke' mark – a figure referred to by banksters as ‘lots and lots of money’ – but that in her unqualified opinion this factor simply served to emphasise the incompetence of New Labour’s successive dynamic duo of ‘Scottish’ Chancellors of the Exchequer - Gordon Brown and Alastair Darling – and the unsustainable level of spending they racked up during 13 years of playing Russian roulette with the national economy.
Conversely, this horrifying debt figure besides, the incumbent Tory Chancellor George Osborne claims financial initiatives are still on course to hit his borrowing target for the financial year of a mere £127 billion quid. Que? WTF!? How fucking much? No wonder Britain’s ‘Broken’ with a large capital B - and we’re worried about a bit of personal credit card debt from the Christmas spend or running up a £50 nicker overdraft at the bank.
Why the fuck does Osborne need to borrow £127 billion quid, we’d like to know, considering every expense and outgoing in the country’s been slashed – apart from his jugular - yet.
So we’re bollocks deep in a Debtocracy quagmire. No problems - all too easy to solve if we’re determined to get jingoistic about this.
First off we need to stop kissing the Great Satan’s arse and letting the Rothshite crime syndicate and Tel Aviv set the UK’s foreign policy agenda – and hence defer from getting involved in further overseas military misadventures.
Next on the list, call a halt to handing out the taxpayers’ cash to scrounging Third World dumps – especially those whose ruling scumbag oligarchs have more money than Croesus.
If Alex ‘Three Chins’ Salmond and his Scottish SNP-dominated Parliament want independence, it’s all easy-peasy, no referendum required – just fuck off and shut the gates on Hadrian’s Wall as you pass Go. Bye-bye British Navy bases and shipyard orders – and the BBC – and the NHS – and the Royal Mail. Plus stick the Arbroath ‘smokies’ and the bagpipes.
Oh, and don’t forget the multi-billions your Royal Bank of Scumland owes the ‘English’ taxpayers’ purse.
Then put a stop to paying welfare payments out to EUSSR migrant scroungers – and call a referendum – not a repeat of Posh Dave Scameron’s disingenuous promised ‘Never-Endum’ - on continued EUSSR membership and let’s shitcan our connections with the kleptocracy in Brussels immediately – if not sooner – and hoof out all the European minimum wage donkeys, pseudo-plumbers and swan-roasting Albanian pikeys - and free up the UK’s job market again. Hmmm, keeping Brussels’ sticky fingers out of the taxpayers’ coffers will soon up the ante.
As Posh Dave Scameron’s ‘Big Society’ volunteer project has as much chance of success as shoving butter up a porcupine’s arse with a red hot knitting needle as it doesn’t pay anything – and the Department of Works and Pensions scheme to make it mandatory for all unemployed peasants cursed with the Jobcentre’s Stage 4 stigmata to take an NVQ1 Chartered Skip Scavvy course is likewise doomed to failure – why the fuck don’t we toss political correctness to the four winds and hoof out all the European minimum wage donkeys and pseudo-plumbers and swan-roasting Albanian pikeys with their forged qualifications from the University of Make Believe - and free up the UK’s job market again.
Next on this drastic agenda – re-industrialise and start self-financing British skills and manufacturing. Outlaw ‘outsourcing’; railroad a bill through Parliament disenfranchising all ‘Quangos’ – then present the House of Conmans MPs with a salary cut. If the unemployed are supposed to survive on £60-odd quid a week and pensioners on £102 quid then they can take a cut in their £64,766 nicker per annum – plus expenses.
So, how about those for a set of instant fiscal reforms? And all without a qualification in economics - much the same as the clots who got Britain into this mess in the first place – Thatcher, Major, Bliar and Scameron.
Thought for the day. Well at least Britain’s not as fucked up as the good ole U.S. of A with its $16 trillion dollar overdraft. Who fancies paying the interest on that one? Jesus, God rest His soul, had the right idea with the usurious money lenders – shut the shifty Shylocks’ operations right down.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Tuesday, 24 January 2012
Iran Set Up for False Flag Patsy Scam
In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Leon ‘Noser’ Vendetta, the US Secretary of Defence, yesterday announced to White House press hacks that the oldest and most decrepit aircraft carrier in the known Universe, the USS Enterprise CVA(N)-65 – which also has the dubious distinction of being the first of the US 24/7 war-ready nuclear-powered carrier fleet ever to be launched - a very long time ago - is now heading for the Persian Gulf on a final voyage - to send a hostile and provocative ‘Mexican stand-off’ message to Tehran.
Secretary Vendetta informed the media “The reason we’re dispatching the Enterprise hinges on the fact that it’s due to be scrapped next year, so if Iran’s Republican Guard crazies go off half-cocked and sink it with one of their Soviet Sunburst ASCM missiles and block the Straits of Hormuz, then the Pentagon and Tel Aviv will have an excuse to bomb the shit outa the heathen-infested dump and install a Christian government that don’t object to eating pork scratchings and hot dogs. Plus it’ll save us all the expense of decommissioning the eight on-board reactors – and we’ll be able to claim the insurance money.”
Ouch! Anybody smell a potential US PNAC / Foreign Policy Initiative ‘New Pearl Harbour’ replay? Another 9/11? Another USS Maine getting scuttled in Havana harbour in 1898 with an explosive charge in the bilges to kick start the war against the Spanish? Another USS Cole / Port of Aden style suicide attack to demonise all Muslims as Jolly Jihad terrorist fanatics? Yet another Gulf of Tonkin Incident? Or another FBI-orchestrated Alfred P. Murrah Building bombing, perhaps? Another JFK magic bullet assassination? Another Mossad-planted micro-nuke in the drain outside the Sari Club in Bali to flash-fry a bunch of Aussie tourists and give Canberra an excuse to join the war on terror?
These people are so transparent with their sore thumb pantomime fiascos – they’re all dead give-aways due the loose-lipped, boastacious Bilderberg Group - and US and Israeli intelligence services - having more fucking leaks than Mother O’Reilly’s colander. They’d be better off with Wiley T. Coyote in charge of their false flag operations – or Wallace and Gromit.
Well, any fucker and their dog with a couple of brain cells still capable of telemetry can see that the Great Satan and Israel – along with their European Rothshite crime syndicate stooges Sarkozy, Merkel and Scameron - are going flat out like a lizard drinking to force the Tehran government into a corner and instigate a violent response. Frozen bank accounts and sanctions on anything and everything – plus the EUSSR and US oil embargo – all destined to have little effect.
Do these New World Order think tank beardies and anoraks, all kitted out with more degrees than a thermometer – and less common sense than a tortoise - burning the midnight oil while dreaming this bullshit up never consider the fact that their target nations aren’t exactly stupid and have foreseen – and hence prepared – to deal with such eventualities?
Hence little wonder that Flatbrokes, Broken Britain’s ubiquitous High Street betting shop chain, are giving top odds that the shit’s going to hit the fan before Easter – with either the US and Israel opting for a ‘who gives a fuck’ pre-emptive first strike on Iran’s nuclear facilities – or - and this being the odd-on favourite – the same pair of ZioNazi war-mongering psychos pulling another of their false flag attacks on themselves and then pointing the fickle finger of fate straight back at Tehran as the fall guy.
Anyone want to guess at how many subs the Israelis have in the Arabian Sea / Gulf of Oman / Persian Gulf right now? Three Type 800 Dolphin class diesel-electric units supplied by their good friends at Howaldtswerke-Deutsche Werft AG in Krautland – specifically the Dolphin, Leviathan and Tekumah.
Each sub’ is armed with 6 x 533 mm tubes designed for torpedoes or Harpoon missiles, and 4 x 650 mm torpedo tubes which can deploy mines, nuclear tipped cruise missiles, or swimmer delivery vehicles.
The Atlas Elektronik DM2A3 torpedoes are wire-guided active homing and deliver a 260 kilo warhead at a speed of 35 knots to a target over 13 klicks away – ideal for work in the Persian Gulf and hitting a barn door-sized 94,000 ton carrier broadsides.
So, bearing in mind that the Israelis have an infamous notoriety as a belligerent mongrel race with a genetic predisposition to hostility - (just read the Bible's Old Testament record) - and a well-known facility as being a bunch of greedy Khazar bastards given to stealing the lands of others (Palestine) – and the motto of their sneaky bastard Mossad is ‘By stealth we do War’ – (then, just like 9/11 blame some other hapless hi-fiving cunt – so typical of their entire history) – who’s up for a few bucks wager that old Admiral Billy Bob Redneck commanding the star-crossed USS Enterprise cops a salvo of Klingon torpedoes or a sneak Harpoon missile attack one dark moonless night soon – launched by the dreaded Mohammed al Patsy and Shaheed al Ka-Boom from their terrorist base on the Planet Q’onos?
Oh yes, right on – and a pity the matelots on board haven’t realised their intended fate yet – reluctant martyrs to the cause of a false flag op’ to be broadcast and promulgated out of all proportion by a compliant Zionist-owned media barrage of black propaganda – just like Saddam Hussein’s weapons of mass distraction - otherwise they’d rename the obsolete carrier the ‘USS Sacrificial Lamb’ – then do the right thing - and mutiny.
And what for Iran? Nada – unlike the Great Satan and Israel, she’s comfortable and satisfied within her own sovereign, territorial boundaries – while the aggressors – the Western warmongers - thirst for her natural resources and strategic global positioning.
Alas, even gifted with the facility of 20/20 hindsight to reflect on the empires of history and their eventual self-consuming failures, this insane neo-colonial ZioNazi expansionism knows no limits – yet!
As the Cheshire Cat confided to Alice “We’re all mad here”.
To wit, let the lunacy run its fatally flawed course, for a grand naval engagement is always a sure boost for the undertaker and prosthetics industries – plus serves to keep the fish fed and fat.
Thought for the day. Hmmm, USS Enterprise besides, what else in the US / Israeli / European-NATO naval ensemble might be in line for a false flag hit?
We have the USS Carl Vinson (carrier), USS Bunker Hill (cruiser) and the USS Halsey (destroyer) – all three going round in ever-decreasing circles out in the Gulf of Oman.
Moored in Bahrain, from the US Fifth Fleet we have the USS Abe Lincoln (carrier), USS Cape St George (cruiser), plus the USS Sterett and USS Momset (both destroyers).
From Broken Britain’s ‘Senior Service’ we have sailing round the Gulf, courtesy of Posh Dave Scameron, the HMS Argyll and HMS Somerset (both frigates), HMS Ramsey (mine hunter), HMS Lyme Bay (landing vessel) and HMS Echo (an aptly-named survey ship).
Last but not least the French navy’s contribution – a newly launched Godermiche class frigate named in honour of the diminutive President Sarkozy – the ‘La Petit Merde’.
Question is – how efficiently are the Coalition of the Aggressors naval Phalanx and Aegis BMD interceptor systems going to cope against Iranian Sunburn and Sunburst missiles? All bets are off on that one. Ah well, sunken ships make great foundations for coral reefs – one thing the Gulf can always do with a few more of.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Leon ‘Noser’ Vendetta, the US Secretary of Defence, yesterday announced to White House press hacks that the oldest and most decrepit aircraft carrier in the known Universe, the USS Enterprise CVA(N)-65 – which also has the dubious distinction of being the first of the US 24/7 war-ready nuclear-powered carrier fleet ever to be launched - a very long time ago - is now heading for the Persian Gulf on a final voyage - to send a hostile and provocative ‘Mexican stand-off’ message to Tehran.
Secretary Vendetta informed the media “The reason we’re dispatching the Enterprise hinges on the fact that it’s due to be scrapped next year, so if Iran’s Republican Guard crazies go off half-cocked and sink it with one of their Soviet Sunburst ASCM missiles and block the Straits of Hormuz, then the Pentagon and Tel Aviv will have an excuse to bomb the shit outa the heathen-infested dump and install a Christian government that don’t object to eating pork scratchings and hot dogs. Plus it’ll save us all the expense of decommissioning the eight on-board reactors – and we’ll be able to claim the insurance money.”
Ouch! Anybody smell a potential US PNAC / Foreign Policy Initiative ‘New Pearl Harbour’ replay? Another 9/11? Another USS Maine getting scuttled in Havana harbour in 1898 with an explosive charge in the bilges to kick start the war against the Spanish? Another USS Cole / Port of Aden style suicide attack to demonise all Muslims as Jolly Jihad terrorist fanatics? Yet another Gulf of Tonkin Incident? Or another FBI-orchestrated Alfred P. Murrah Building bombing, perhaps? Another JFK magic bullet assassination? Another Mossad-planted micro-nuke in the drain outside the Sari Club in Bali to flash-fry a bunch of Aussie tourists and give Canberra an excuse to join the war on terror?
These people are so transparent with their sore thumb pantomime fiascos – they’re all dead give-aways due the loose-lipped, boastacious Bilderberg Group - and US and Israeli intelligence services - having more fucking leaks than Mother O’Reilly’s colander. They’d be better off with Wiley T. Coyote in charge of their false flag operations – or Wallace and Gromit.
Well, any fucker and their dog with a couple of brain cells still capable of telemetry can see that the Great Satan and Israel – along with their European Rothshite crime syndicate stooges Sarkozy, Merkel and Scameron - are going flat out like a lizard drinking to force the Tehran government into a corner and instigate a violent response. Frozen bank accounts and sanctions on anything and everything – plus the EUSSR and US oil embargo – all destined to have little effect.
Do these New World Order think tank beardies and anoraks, all kitted out with more degrees than a thermometer – and less common sense than a tortoise - burning the midnight oil while dreaming this bullshit up never consider the fact that their target nations aren’t exactly stupid and have foreseen – and hence prepared – to deal with such eventualities?
Hence little wonder that Flatbrokes, Broken Britain’s ubiquitous High Street betting shop chain, are giving top odds that the shit’s going to hit the fan before Easter – with either the US and Israel opting for a ‘who gives a fuck’ pre-emptive first strike on Iran’s nuclear facilities – or - and this being the odd-on favourite – the same pair of ZioNazi war-mongering psychos pulling another of their false flag attacks on themselves and then pointing the fickle finger of fate straight back at Tehran as the fall guy.
Anyone want to guess at how many subs the Israelis have in the Arabian Sea / Gulf of Oman / Persian Gulf right now? Three Type 800 Dolphin class diesel-electric units supplied by their good friends at Howaldtswerke-Deutsche Werft AG in Krautland – specifically the Dolphin, Leviathan and Tekumah.
Each sub’ is armed with 6 x 533 mm tubes designed for torpedoes or Harpoon missiles, and 4 x 650 mm torpedo tubes which can deploy mines, nuclear tipped cruise missiles, or swimmer delivery vehicles.
The Atlas Elektronik DM2A3 torpedoes are wire-guided active homing and deliver a 260 kilo warhead at a speed of 35 knots to a target over 13 klicks away – ideal for work in the Persian Gulf and hitting a barn door-sized 94,000 ton carrier broadsides.
So, bearing in mind that the Israelis have an infamous notoriety as a belligerent mongrel race with a genetic predisposition to hostility - (just read the Bible's Old Testament record) - and a well-known facility as being a bunch of greedy Khazar bastards given to stealing the lands of others (Palestine) – and the motto of their sneaky bastard Mossad is ‘By stealth we do War’ – (then, just like 9/11 blame some other hapless hi-fiving cunt – so typical of their entire history) – who’s up for a few bucks wager that old Admiral Billy Bob Redneck commanding the star-crossed USS Enterprise cops a salvo of Klingon torpedoes or a sneak Harpoon missile attack one dark moonless night soon – launched by the dreaded Mohammed al Patsy and Shaheed al Ka-Boom from their terrorist base on the Planet Q’onos?
Oh yes, right on – and a pity the matelots on board haven’t realised their intended fate yet – reluctant martyrs to the cause of a false flag op’ to be broadcast and promulgated out of all proportion by a compliant Zionist-owned media barrage of black propaganda – just like Saddam Hussein’s weapons of mass distraction - otherwise they’d rename the obsolete carrier the ‘USS Sacrificial Lamb’ – then do the right thing - and mutiny.
And what for Iran? Nada – unlike the Great Satan and Israel, she’s comfortable and satisfied within her own sovereign, territorial boundaries – while the aggressors – the Western warmongers - thirst for her natural resources and strategic global positioning.
Alas, even gifted with the facility of 20/20 hindsight to reflect on the empires of history and their eventual self-consuming failures, this insane neo-colonial ZioNazi expansionism knows no limits – yet!
As the Cheshire Cat confided to Alice “We’re all mad here”.
To wit, let the lunacy run its fatally flawed course, for a grand naval engagement is always a sure boost for the undertaker and prosthetics industries – plus serves to keep the fish fed and fat.
Thought for the day. Hmmm, USS Enterprise besides, what else in the US / Israeli / European-NATO naval ensemble might be in line for a false flag hit?
We have the USS Carl Vinson (carrier), USS Bunker Hill (cruiser) and the USS Halsey (destroyer) – all three going round in ever-decreasing circles out in the Gulf of Oman.
Moored in Bahrain, from the US Fifth Fleet we have the USS Abe Lincoln (carrier), USS Cape St George (cruiser), plus the USS Sterett and USS Momset (both destroyers).
From Broken Britain’s ‘Senior Service’ we have sailing round the Gulf, courtesy of Posh Dave Scameron, the HMS Argyll and HMS Somerset (both frigates), HMS Ramsey (mine hunter), HMS Lyme Bay (landing vessel) and HMS Echo (an aptly-named survey ship).
Last but not least the French navy’s contribution – a newly launched Godermiche class frigate named in honour of the diminutive President Sarkozy – the ‘La Petit Merde’.
Question is – how efficiently are the Coalition of the Aggressors naval Phalanx and Aegis BMD interceptor systems going to cope against Iranian Sunburn and Sunburst missiles? All bets are off on that one. Ah well, sunken ships make great foundations for coral reefs – one thing the Gulf can always do with a few more of.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Monday, 23 January 2012
UK Plod Squad Target Anarchists
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The City of Westminster Plod Squad’s ‘risk averse’ Counter Terrorist Focus team is on the lookout for further recruits to join their battalion-strength crew of low life grassers and snitches for Project Griffin – the undercover operation currently tasked to spy and report on the activities of suspected socio-political discontent members of Broken Britain’s disadvantaged demographic.
The scope of Project Griffin has its parameters set to include any fucker or their dog suspected to be labouring away with diligence and malice aforethought across the length and breadth of our once-sceptred isle, to undermine the establishe Monarchical elitist order and herald in an age of unparalleled anarchy – as instanced last summer during the Tottenham riots – a phenomenon being further manifested at a geometric rate by the burgeoning ranks of the 99% - Occupy groups affected by this current pandemic outbreak of Oppositional Defiance Disorder that owes its origins to the UK’s economic woes, the ‘recession’ and decades of government ineptitude.
Project Griffin’s published fliers bear the dire warning message that "Anarchism is a political philosophy which considers the state undesirable, unnecessary, and harmful, and instead promotes a non-conformist society bent on acts of civil disobedience. All information relating to noxious anarchists should be reported to the nearest Plod Squad station or any of your local neighbourhood Community Enforcement Officers at the Renta-Moron Agency."
Well, what to do indeed when Posh Dave Scameron’s Libservative Coalition and his Millionaire’s Cabinet are out to stereotype anyone who disagrees with their appalling record of mismanagement – or dares mention broken election manifesto pledges promising a one-off ‘in or out’ EUSSR membership referendum - or questions the integrity of the Tory Friends of Israel Club’s intentions by modifying our International Arrest Warrant rulings to allow kikester war criminals to visit Britain without fear of being apprehended for their sins of human rights abuse against the Palestinian populations of the Gaza Strip - or simply has the audacity to complain over the epidemic of potholes infesting our road system – or the fact economic migrants can claim welfare benefits and steal the jobs of the UK’s born and bred unemployed peasant classes.
To wit, any and all who fall under into the above categories will henceforth be branded as a budding anti-Christ preaching the gospel of insidious Anarchy.
Conversely, when our nation’s affairs have been, and continue to be, run so badly we’ve devolved from being the founders of the Industrial Revolution ruling an Empire on which the sun never set to become a Debtocracy under the thumb of the IMF’s usurious Shylock banksters and the EUSSR kleptocrats in Brussels - and the Tory-dominated coalition government’s poll figures have plummeted following the calamitous rupture of PM Scameron’s PIP 'credibility' implant - then it’s little wonder the common herd get pissed off. Plus the ruling elites know it too – hence their justified paranoia that such depressed socio-economic conditions might just kick start rebellious, head-rolling repeats of 1789 and 1917 before 2012 is over and done with.
The circulation of the Counter Terrorist Focus team’s briefing missive has righteously pissed off a legion of the country’s leading patriots, loyal to the statutes of Magna Carta, who consider themselves unfairly criminalised for holding a set of perfectly valid political beliefs – that the government sucks – even if they unfortunately don’t quite gel with Tory Party policy.
Bazzer ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher, editor of the Anarchy Gazette, complained “Wot the fuck they at, eh – warnin’ people that we’re a bunch of nutters on the same flyer wot’s about Muslim terrorists wiv explodin’ shoes and jockey shorts?”
“This is typical of the effin’ Tories getting’ their elitist arses back inter Downin’ Street – the place where the bullshit never sleeps – wiv their New World Order scam the primary item on the agenda. Don’t forget, the jackboot’s first steps on the path ter fascism are always tip-toe soft.”
“But wot can we expect in this economic environment when the whole country’s goin’ tits up in a grand spectacular Busby Berkeley fashion an’ the government’s usin’ Kafkaesque an’ Orwellian Big Brother ‘Thought Crime’ brandin’ ter criminalise ideas it deems ter be dangerous ter its own effin’ survival.”
“We’ve already got these stop an’ search orders under Section 60 of the Criminal Justice Order Act of 1994 wot allows searches wivout reasonable suspicion.”
“Then yer got the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act – on top of the effin’ Police Reform & Social Responsibility Act 2011 – wot’s all backed up wiv Section 19 of the Police and Criminal Evidence Act wot allows the plods ter seize any item they reckon might contains evidence in relation to an offence – like yer ‘Scameron Sucks’ protest poster.”
“So wot’s gonna be next on the list, I asks yer? Are they gonna copy wot the Yanks have done an’ class us all as domestic terrorists? Are the Tories gonna push through an Enemy Expatriation Act – an’ a Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act – an’ a National Defense Authorization Act – wot is actually an ‘Indefinite Detention Act’?”
“It’s all a crock of shit cos the Plods are supposed ter work under the convention on human rights wot disallows discrimination against people cos their political beliefs are at odds wiv the government’s deluded ideas. Yeah, I know, an’ pigs might fly too.”
“Now Scameron’s coalition are boostin’ the ranks of these Community Enforcement Officers wot’s just a bunch of uniformed fetishists wiv an officious bent fer intimidatin’ them lesser mortals wot comprises the ranks of the peasant classes an’ piss on our self-esteem an’ personal dignity – an’ that’s us poor fuckers – the lowly drawers of water an’ hewers of firewood.”
“Trust me, these PCSO an’ CEO scumbags, devoid of any realistic Plod Squad trainin’, are all limited by their moronic cultural prejudices cos of bein’ reared on a diet of red top gutter press tabloids an’ TV media propaganda.”
Do you live in an anarchist-infested community? Are there any anarchists operating in your area? How about black Muslim anarchists with dreadlocks and a nihilistic bent? What kind of anti-establishment graffiti gets sprayed in bus shelters and on walls in your neighbourhood?
Send your comments to the Counter Terrorist Focus team using the online Snitch & Grassers form below and you could win a year’s membership of the all-new Libservative Coalition Party.
A selection of your comments may be published, displaying your name and location, so some feral Bolshie anarchist types can come round and lob a petrol bomb through your front window.
Thought for the day: So, the hypocrisy of Posh Dave Scameron’s ‘Big Society’ concept besides, obviously Project Griffin stands as testament that there will be no magnanimous embrace for members of the national community who disagree with government policy or have the temerity to think for themselves and express outrage at being shafted by their own elected Parliament. To wit, fuck Big Brother – and his sister – and the New World Order.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
The City of Westminster Plod Squad’s ‘risk averse’ Counter Terrorist Focus team is on the lookout for further recruits to join their battalion-strength crew of low life grassers and snitches for Project Griffin – the undercover operation currently tasked to spy and report on the activities of suspected socio-political discontent members of Broken Britain’s disadvantaged demographic.
The scope of Project Griffin has its parameters set to include any fucker or their dog suspected to be labouring away with diligence and malice aforethought across the length and breadth of our once-sceptred isle, to undermine the establishe Monarchical elitist order and herald in an age of unparalleled anarchy – as instanced last summer during the Tottenham riots – a phenomenon being further manifested at a geometric rate by the burgeoning ranks of the 99% - Occupy groups affected by this current pandemic outbreak of Oppositional Defiance Disorder that owes its origins to the UK’s economic woes, the ‘recession’ and decades of government ineptitude.
Project Griffin’s published fliers bear the dire warning message that "Anarchism is a political philosophy which considers the state undesirable, unnecessary, and harmful, and instead promotes a non-conformist society bent on acts of civil disobedience. All information relating to noxious anarchists should be reported to the nearest Plod Squad station or any of your local neighbourhood Community Enforcement Officers at the Renta-Moron Agency."
Well, what to do indeed when Posh Dave Scameron’s Libservative Coalition and his Millionaire’s Cabinet are out to stereotype anyone who disagrees with their appalling record of mismanagement – or dares mention broken election manifesto pledges promising a one-off ‘in or out’ EUSSR membership referendum - or questions the integrity of the Tory Friends of Israel Club’s intentions by modifying our International Arrest Warrant rulings to allow kikester war criminals to visit Britain without fear of being apprehended for their sins of human rights abuse against the Palestinian populations of the Gaza Strip - or simply has the audacity to complain over the epidemic of potholes infesting our road system – or the fact economic migrants can claim welfare benefits and steal the jobs of the UK’s born and bred unemployed peasant classes.
To wit, any and all who fall under into the above categories will henceforth be branded as a budding anti-Christ preaching the gospel of insidious Anarchy.
Conversely, when our nation’s affairs have been, and continue to be, run so badly we’ve devolved from being the founders of the Industrial Revolution ruling an Empire on which the sun never set to become a Debtocracy under the thumb of the IMF’s usurious Shylock banksters and the EUSSR kleptocrats in Brussels - and the Tory-dominated coalition government’s poll figures have plummeted following the calamitous rupture of PM Scameron’s PIP 'credibility' implant - then it’s little wonder the common herd get pissed off. Plus the ruling elites know it too – hence their justified paranoia that such depressed socio-economic conditions might just kick start rebellious, head-rolling repeats of 1789 and 1917 before 2012 is over and done with.
The circulation of the Counter Terrorist Focus team’s briefing missive has righteously pissed off a legion of the country’s leading patriots, loyal to the statutes of Magna Carta, who consider themselves unfairly criminalised for holding a set of perfectly valid political beliefs – that the government sucks – even if they unfortunately don’t quite gel with Tory Party policy.
Bazzer ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher, editor of the Anarchy Gazette, complained “Wot the fuck they at, eh – warnin’ people that we’re a bunch of nutters on the same flyer wot’s about Muslim terrorists wiv explodin’ shoes and jockey shorts?”
“This is typical of the effin’ Tories getting’ their elitist arses back inter Downin’ Street – the place where the bullshit never sleeps – wiv their New World Order scam the primary item on the agenda. Don’t forget, the jackboot’s first steps on the path ter fascism are always tip-toe soft.”
“But wot can we expect in this economic environment when the whole country’s goin’ tits up in a grand spectacular Busby Berkeley fashion an’ the government’s usin’ Kafkaesque an’ Orwellian Big Brother ‘Thought Crime’ brandin’ ter criminalise ideas it deems ter be dangerous ter its own effin’ survival.”
“We’ve already got these stop an’ search orders under Section 60 of the Criminal Justice Order Act of 1994 wot allows searches wivout reasonable suspicion.”
“Then yer got the Regulation of Investigatory Powers Act – on top of the effin’ Police Reform & Social Responsibility Act 2011 – wot’s all backed up wiv Section 19 of the Police and Criminal Evidence Act wot allows the plods ter seize any item they reckon might contains evidence in relation to an offence – like yer ‘Scameron Sucks’ protest poster.”
“So wot’s gonna be next on the list, I asks yer? Are they gonna copy wot the Yanks have done an’ class us all as domestic terrorists? Are the Tories gonna push through an Enemy Expatriation Act – an’ a Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act – an’ a National Defense Authorization Act – wot is actually an ‘Indefinite Detention Act’?”
“It’s all a crock of shit cos the Plods are supposed ter work under the convention on human rights wot disallows discrimination against people cos their political beliefs are at odds wiv the government’s deluded ideas. Yeah, I know, an’ pigs might fly too.”
“Now Scameron’s coalition are boostin’ the ranks of these Community Enforcement Officers wot’s just a bunch of uniformed fetishists wiv an officious bent fer intimidatin’ them lesser mortals wot comprises the ranks of the peasant classes an’ piss on our self-esteem an’ personal dignity – an’ that’s us poor fuckers – the lowly drawers of water an’ hewers of firewood.”
“Trust me, these PCSO an’ CEO scumbags, devoid of any realistic Plod Squad trainin’, are all limited by their moronic cultural prejudices cos of bein’ reared on a diet of red top gutter press tabloids an’ TV media propaganda.”
Do you live in an anarchist-infested community? Are there any anarchists operating in your area? How about black Muslim anarchists with dreadlocks and a nihilistic bent? What kind of anti-establishment graffiti gets sprayed in bus shelters and on walls in your neighbourhood?
Send your comments to the Counter Terrorist Focus team using the online Snitch & Grassers form below and you could win a year’s membership of the all-new Libservative Coalition Party.
A selection of your comments may be published, displaying your name and location, so some feral Bolshie anarchist types can come round and lob a petrol bomb through your front window.
Thought for the day: So, the hypocrisy of Posh Dave Scameron’s ‘Big Society’ concept besides, obviously Project Griffin stands as testament that there will be no magnanimous embrace for members of the national community who disagree with government policy or have the temerity to think for themselves and express outrage at being shafted by their own elected Parliament. To wit, fuck Big Brother – and his sister – and the New World Order.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Sunday, 22 January 2012
Israeli ZioNazis Redefine ‘Apartheid’
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
The gospel according to a report just released by the international human rights and wrongs monitor Kunt-Watch has, with righteous damnation aforethought, dealt a crippling blow to Israel’s pretence of being the Mid-East’s ‘showcase of democracy’ by condemning Bobo Nuttyahoo’s Knesset government and the IDF military for their despicable treatment of the usurped and marginalised Palestinian populations of the rapidly diminishing occupied West Bank and isolated Gaza Strip – jointly besieged behind 30-foot high Great Apartheid Walls inside the biggest Nazi style racist concentration camps on the planet that while their insidious checkpoints are manned by the ranks of the IDF’s homicidal storm troopers only lack the customary Arbeit Macht Frei signs over the gates.
The director of the Vienna-based Kunt-Watch charity, Herr Genghis Yidstamper, informed one press hack from the War Crimes Gazette that “Not only are the Palestinians in the occupied West Bank harassed at every turn and discriminated against via government regulations enforced with a crude manner and violence by the IDF troops and corrupt police but also by the illegal kikester settlers who are cutting down their orchards and poisoning wells and stealing their lands – under the protection of the military.”
“Perhaps the Germans taught them too well, for all the crimes they claim were visited on them by Hitler’s thugs during what their propaganda – their fantasy ‘hasbara’ - terms the Holohoax, and with the unqualified arrogance so typical of the kikesters they are now inflicting on the dispossessed Palestinians a slow-cook genocide and tip-toe ethnic cleansing policy.”
“They have amnesia and a total absence of moral conscience that will one day soon come back and bite them squarely in the arse for their ignoring UN resolutions and treating the rules of polite society and statutes of international law like a doormat – like a toilet in fact. Their brazen hubris – this ‘chutzpah’ of their culture – it is despicable this contempt they have for those they brand as ‘goyim’.”
“The kikester-dominated media continually promote this rhetoric versus reality flawed narrative – this lie that their people are more cultured and smarter than the Gentiles – the unwashed masses – ‘the goyim’ as these racist scumbags refer to non-Jews – and even the likes of Moroccan and Ethiopian Jews – these Khazar-Ashkenazi impostor shifty Shylocks of convenience – the scum of the Rothshite-Baboon crime syndicate.”
“We are faced with their disingenuous propaganda dynamic - spouted in the face of fact - that alludes to their purported ‘Perfect Society’ of Israel. Alas, what hope is there for any peaceful resolution and the stolen lands ever being returned to the Palestinians who lost all in the 1948 Yawm an-Nakbah – the Day of the Catastrophe – the start of the Palestinian Holocaust – when the Israeli terrorists – the Haganah and Stern Gang and Irgun – drove them out in a mad dog Manifest Destiny massacre and established the rogue apartheid state of Israel on stolen land.”
“So these yidsters or kikesters – these yid and kike gangsters - maintain their ideological and cultural programming – the delusion that they are God’s Chosen People – the Children of the Covenant – and ignore the fact that the Palestinians are the true Semite owners of the Holy Land – Palestine – not these Khazar-Ashkenazi impostors – these Jews of convenience installed and financed by the Rothshite-Sassoon crime syndicate – and the hapless goyim taxpayers of the Great Satan.”
“Now the world is starting to scrutinise the human rights abuses committed by a belligerent Israel - and the privations of the Palestinians under their fascist jackboot. People are aware that the Israeli government have imposed on the Palestinians a harsher regime of apartheid than ever the Boer whites did upon the blacks of South Africa – and this is evidenced by the success of the global Boycotts, Divestment and Sanctions campaign against Israeli goods.”
The plight of the Palestinian peoples – in both the occupied West Bank and Gaza Strip enclave is bringing their dispossessed situation to a critical mass state of being at a geometric rate - ready to erupt in a cataclysmic chain reaction proportionate to the sum total of past privations and sufferings under the dictatorial misrule of the nutty Knesset’s despots and their trigger-happy tosspot IDF military goons. Roll on the Third Intifada.
Thought for the day. To misquote the French ‘Age of Enlightenment’ philosopher Diderot: There exists now a maxim agreed between Christians and Muslims, and too Jews of conscience, that there will never be any form of peace for the dispossessed Palestinians or the Holy Land until the final Zionist usurper is strangled with the disembowelled entrails of the last Rothshite-Baboon bankster crime syndicate’s military-industrial scumbag.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a ZioNazi-infested area and may contain traces of apartheid, lunacy and galloping racism.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
The gospel according to a report just released by the international human rights and wrongs monitor Kunt-Watch has, with righteous damnation aforethought, dealt a crippling blow to Israel’s pretence of being the Mid-East’s ‘showcase of democracy’ by condemning Bobo Nuttyahoo’s Knesset government and the IDF military for their despicable treatment of the usurped and marginalised Palestinian populations of the rapidly diminishing occupied West Bank and isolated Gaza Strip – jointly besieged behind 30-foot high Great Apartheid Walls inside the biggest Nazi style racist concentration camps on the planet that while their insidious checkpoints are manned by the ranks of the IDF’s homicidal storm troopers only lack the customary Arbeit Macht Frei signs over the gates.
The director of the Vienna-based Kunt-Watch charity, Herr Genghis Yidstamper, informed one press hack from the War Crimes Gazette that “Not only are the Palestinians in the occupied West Bank harassed at every turn and discriminated against via government regulations enforced with a crude manner and violence by the IDF troops and corrupt police but also by the illegal kikester settlers who are cutting down their orchards and poisoning wells and stealing their lands – under the protection of the military.”
“Perhaps the Germans taught them too well, for all the crimes they claim were visited on them by Hitler’s thugs during what their propaganda – their fantasy ‘hasbara’ - terms the Holohoax, and with the unqualified arrogance so typical of the kikesters they are now inflicting on the dispossessed Palestinians a slow-cook genocide and tip-toe ethnic cleansing policy.”
“They have amnesia and a total absence of moral conscience that will one day soon come back and bite them squarely in the arse for their ignoring UN resolutions and treating the rules of polite society and statutes of international law like a doormat – like a toilet in fact. Their brazen hubris – this ‘chutzpah’ of their culture – it is despicable this contempt they have for those they brand as ‘goyim’.”
“The kikester-dominated media continually promote this rhetoric versus reality flawed narrative – this lie that their people are more cultured and smarter than the Gentiles – the unwashed masses – ‘the goyim’ as these racist scumbags refer to non-Jews – and even the likes of Moroccan and Ethiopian Jews – these Khazar-Ashkenazi impostor shifty Shylocks of convenience – the scum of the Rothshite-Baboon crime syndicate.”
“We are faced with their disingenuous propaganda dynamic - spouted in the face of fact - that alludes to their purported ‘Perfect Society’ of Israel. Alas, what hope is there for any peaceful resolution and the stolen lands ever being returned to the Palestinians who lost all in the 1948 Yawm an-Nakbah – the Day of the Catastrophe – the start of the Palestinian Holocaust – when the Israeli terrorists – the Haganah and Stern Gang and Irgun – drove them out in a mad dog Manifest Destiny massacre and established the rogue apartheid state of Israel on stolen land.”
“So these yidsters or kikesters – these yid and kike gangsters - maintain their ideological and cultural programming – the delusion that they are God’s Chosen People – the Children of the Covenant – and ignore the fact that the Palestinians are the true Semite owners of the Holy Land – Palestine – not these Khazar-Ashkenazi impostors – these Jews of convenience installed and financed by the Rothshite-Sassoon crime syndicate – and the hapless goyim taxpayers of the Great Satan.”
“Now the world is starting to scrutinise the human rights abuses committed by a belligerent Israel - and the privations of the Palestinians under their fascist jackboot. People are aware that the Israeli government have imposed on the Palestinians a harsher regime of apartheid than ever the Boer whites did upon the blacks of South Africa – and this is evidenced by the success of the global Boycotts, Divestment and Sanctions campaign against Israeli goods.”
The plight of the Palestinian peoples – in both the occupied West Bank and Gaza Strip enclave is bringing their dispossessed situation to a critical mass state of being at a geometric rate - ready to erupt in a cataclysmic chain reaction proportionate to the sum total of past privations and sufferings under the dictatorial misrule of the nutty Knesset’s despots and their trigger-happy tosspot IDF military goons. Roll on the Third Intifada.
Thought for the day. To misquote the French ‘Age of Enlightenment’ philosopher Diderot: There exists now a maxim agreed between Christians and Muslims, and too Jews of conscience, that there will never be any form of peace for the dispossessed Palestinians or the Holy Land until the final Zionist usurper is strangled with the disembowelled entrails of the last Rothshite-Baboon bankster crime syndicate’s military-industrial scumbag.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a ZioNazi-infested area and may contain traces of apartheid, lunacy and galloping racism.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Saturday, 21 January 2012
UK: Benefit Scrounger’s Vacation Choice
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
A joint report just released by the Ministry for Wasting Time & Money, researched and compiled in collusion with Parliament’s fact finding Duck Egg Commission, finally reveals officially what the common herd have known for years - that Broken Britain is the number one destination of choice for the entire global spectrum of Empire’s Day-qualified socio-economic refugees, penniless political asylum seekers, migrant scroungers, foreign rip-off gangs and a generalised bunch of vacationing benefit tourists from the other poverty-stricken 26 EUSSR member states.
According to the report’s damning gospel, droves of swan roasting pikeys and a legion of other manky migrants who are unable to draw sod all in the way of welfare payments in their own Third World shitholes can turn up in the UK and - thanks to the past New Labour government policy and stupid EUSSR legislation - start claiming unemployment, housing and incapacity benefit from day one – plus sign up for free NHS medical treatment – get a nice fresh kidney transplant then sod off back home to ‘Cadgerstan’ and resell it for a few thousand bucks.
Through the analysis of actuarial data the detailed demographic report lays bare the appalling facts that as of December 2011 there are 371,000 foreign-born claimants raking in Jobseekers Allowance and other unemployment-related benefits out of a total 5.5 million recipients. Of these, 258,000 were from outside the European Economic Area – with over 72,000 from Somalia alone – all registered on the Jobcentre’s central data banks as actively searching for work in the ‘Piracy-Shipping’ / ‘Hostage Ransom’ industries.
In-depth analysis shows that the highest number of migrants on benefits originally came from Pakiland and India - with Iraq also featuring prominently after Tony Bliar sanctioned the illegal invasion and destruction of the nation’s infrastructure in 2003. Additionally, EUSSR member states were among the Top 20 scroungers – which included Poland, Ireland, France, Italy – and grotty Greece – all of whom submitted claims for the £200 quid Winter Fuel Allowance last December on behalf of their grandmothers – along with state pension and child benefit – and any other handouts that might be going.
Section 15A-03 of the controversial 36,000 page report exposes an entire smorgasbord of shady practices being undertaken by dodgy claimants to ‘up the ante’ of their benefit entitlements.
While Jobseekers’ Allowance is currently paid at a top rate of £67.50 quid a week, incapacity benefit is worth up to £94.25 – hence one gang of Polacks in Leeds who had no great commercial success with impersonating plumbers and electricians resorted to smashing each others knee caps with a claw hammer to qualify for the £94 nicker rate disability payments – plus a free pair of NHS crutches.
Further to the afore-mentioned abuses and the impact on the welfare system caused by legions of foreign scroungers in the UK on their personalised ‘do or die’ mooching missions, ministers are concerned with the number of jobs being snatched up by unqualified migrants.
Official figures show that up to 90 percent of new jobs created in Britain over the past two years have gone to foreign workers while levels of unemployment for redundancy-hit native born Anglo-Saxon Brit’s rose at a disproportionate, geometric rate.
Conversely the Libservative Coalition government believes that improving the education and training of Britons, particularly the younger generation, is the key to ensuring that they can compete for jobs against the influx of begging gits and migrants kitted out with sheaves of forged skill proficiency certificates and university degrees – if an employment climate ever so manifests where jobs once again grow on trees.
However, with the Bank of England mandated interest rate bogged down at a paltry 0:5% and this depression stretching its reach far over the future’s horizon then don’t hold your breath for too long.
Are you British-born and unemployed, over 16 years of age but under 65? Sign up now for a free Department of Works & Pensions NVQ1 course on Advanced Welfare Benefit Fraud and put yourself in a better position to compete with the hordes of foreign scroungers already milking the system dry. Like the Lotto advert says - "You've got to be in to win!"
Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and/or squirrel shit.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
A joint report just released by the Ministry for Wasting Time & Money, researched and compiled in collusion with Parliament’s fact finding Duck Egg Commission, finally reveals officially what the common herd have known for years - that Broken Britain is the number one destination of choice for the entire global spectrum of Empire’s Day-qualified socio-economic refugees, penniless political asylum seekers, migrant scroungers, foreign rip-off gangs and a generalised bunch of vacationing benefit tourists from the other poverty-stricken 26 EUSSR member states.
According to the report’s damning gospel, droves of swan roasting pikeys and a legion of other manky migrants who are unable to draw sod all in the way of welfare payments in their own Third World shitholes can turn up in the UK and - thanks to the past New Labour government policy and stupid EUSSR legislation - start claiming unemployment, housing and incapacity benefit from day one – plus sign up for free NHS medical treatment – get a nice fresh kidney transplant then sod off back home to ‘Cadgerstan’ and resell it for a few thousand bucks.
Through the analysis of actuarial data the detailed demographic report lays bare the appalling facts that as of December 2011 there are 371,000 foreign-born claimants raking in Jobseekers Allowance and other unemployment-related benefits out of a total 5.5 million recipients. Of these, 258,000 were from outside the European Economic Area – with over 72,000 from Somalia alone – all registered on the Jobcentre’s central data banks as actively searching for work in the ‘Piracy-Shipping’ / ‘Hostage Ransom’ industries.
In-depth analysis shows that the highest number of migrants on benefits originally came from Pakiland and India - with Iraq also featuring prominently after Tony Bliar sanctioned the illegal invasion and destruction of the nation’s infrastructure in 2003. Additionally, EUSSR member states were among the Top 20 scroungers – which included Poland, Ireland, France, Italy – and grotty Greece – all of whom submitted claims for the £200 quid Winter Fuel Allowance last December on behalf of their grandmothers – along with state pension and child benefit – and any other handouts that might be going.
Section 15A-03 of the controversial 36,000 page report exposes an entire smorgasbord of shady practices being undertaken by dodgy claimants to ‘up the ante’ of their benefit entitlements.
While Jobseekers’ Allowance is currently paid at a top rate of £67.50 quid a week, incapacity benefit is worth up to £94.25 – hence one gang of Polacks in Leeds who had no great commercial success with impersonating plumbers and electricians resorted to smashing each others knee caps with a claw hammer to qualify for the £94 nicker rate disability payments – plus a free pair of NHS crutches.
Further to the afore-mentioned abuses and the impact on the welfare system caused by legions of foreign scroungers in the UK on their personalised ‘do or die’ mooching missions, ministers are concerned with the number of jobs being snatched up by unqualified migrants.
Official figures show that up to 90 percent of new jobs created in Britain over the past two years have gone to foreign workers while levels of unemployment for redundancy-hit native born Anglo-Saxon Brit’s rose at a disproportionate, geometric rate.
Conversely the Libservative Coalition government believes that improving the education and training of Britons, particularly the younger generation, is the key to ensuring that they can compete for jobs against the influx of begging gits and migrants kitted out with sheaves of forged skill proficiency certificates and university degrees – if an employment climate ever so manifests where jobs once again grow on trees.
However, with the Bank of England mandated interest rate bogged down at a paltry 0:5% and this depression stretching its reach far over the future’s horizon then don’t hold your breath for too long.
Are you British-born and unemployed, over 16 years of age but under 65? Sign up now for a free Department of Works & Pensions NVQ1 course on Advanced Welfare Benefit Fraud and put yourself in a better position to compete with the hordes of foreign scroungers already milking the system dry. Like the Lotto advert says - "You've got to be in to win!"
Allergy warning: This article was written in a nut-infested area and may contain traces of lunacy and/or squirrel shit.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Lib-Dum MEP Gives ‘Nepotism’ a Bad Name
In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
Diana Wallis, the power-hungry Librarian-Dummercrat MEP for Yorkshire and the Bumber is currently copping for shedloads of criticism from all quarters of the socio-political spectrum following the bombshell announcement of her resignation from the Brussels-based EUSSR post – and the improbity of her simoniacal ‘let’s keep it in the family’ intention of automatically sliding her husband, Stewie ‘Knobhead’ Arnold, into the vacated position with nary a vote of public confidence nor approval being cast.
Apparently Wallis – described by friends and political associates alike as a person whose ego far surpasses her limited intellect - spit the dummy in true ‘nobody loves me’ tantrum fashion following her failed bid earlier this week to win the presidency of the European Parliament - losing out to the popular German Pancake Tuesday Adventist Party candidate Fellattia van der Gamm.
Former EUSSR minister and Rotherham Labour MP Denis McScrote opined to one press hack from the Simony Gazette "By any standard of nepotism it is unacceptable that as one Lib-Dum MEP flounces out of the European Parliament because she got a huff on with this failed ego trip bid to get her pathetic arse elected to the Presidency of the European Parliament that she is automatically replaced by her own tosspot of a husband.”
“Alas, it always presents a problem when others fail to regard you with the same level of fawning worship as does the vanity mirror – but this ‘his and hers’ seats for lucrative MEP slots makes a mockery of Yorkshire's right to elect an MEP of their own choice – and the ball’s now in the court of the Lib-Dum leader – the incumbent Deputy Prime Minister Mick Clogg - to clear up this shameful mess of nepotistic pottage.”
Speaking in her own defence on Sky One’s ‘Fiddling Twats Hour’ - and denying rumours she had redefined the meaning of Nepotism with a large capital N - Wallis related that her bid for the EUSSR Presidency had been for reasons she deeply believed in – specifically the opportunity for self-aggrandisement and ego-massaging – plus the chance to feather her own retirement nest – but now her nose had been pushed out of joint she was stepping down to seek treatment for her chronic halitosis which she personally blamed for rejection in the Presidential post bid.
Dinsdale Spatchcock, the UK Independence Party MEP for Yorkshire and the Bumber, interviewed by the Daily Shitraker, stated that “Wallis is yet another example of menopausal maniacs in a position of political power – just like Angela Merkel. The very concept of her useless husband taking over her MEP seat is a working definition of nepotism – and further, the whole arrangement stinks of graft and corruption.”
“It’s bad enough she employs hubby - who’s a right bellend to start with - as a Parliamentary Assistant – yet another cushy ‘jobs for the boys’ position as her official gopher - running errands, going to the chippy and put the lotto on – and all paid for out of the public purse. Stewie was a former pothole inspector with the Bumber Council Highways Department until he was forced to resign and seek treatment due his self-destructive addiction to asphalt patch sniffing - and now Diana claims he can assume her seat in the European Parliament via succession by cognation or hereditary right. That’s a dodgy equation we don’t need – representation by a bloke that mainlines on Tarmac. Really, something definitely stinks in Denmark, and it isn’t Hamlet’s socks.”
“So, we’re left to speculate on what the egocentric bitch’s next move will be – take a page out of the Roman Catholic Church’s moral turpitude handbook and get into the simony market – and start flogging off benefices and indulgences on Amazon and e-Bay?”
Thought for the day. Within the Oxford English Dictionary’s indexed lexicon of 750,000-plus words there is none that accurately describes Diana Wallis - however it has been unanimously agreed by a conclave of Lib-Dum Party members and MEPs that the word CUNT comes pretty close.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Diana Wallis, the power-hungry Librarian-Dummercrat MEP for Yorkshire and the Bumber is currently copping for shedloads of criticism from all quarters of the socio-political spectrum following the bombshell announcement of her resignation from the Brussels-based EUSSR post – and the improbity of her simoniacal ‘let’s keep it in the family’ intention of automatically sliding her husband, Stewie ‘Knobhead’ Arnold, into the vacated position with nary a vote of public confidence nor approval being cast.
Apparently Wallis – described by friends and political associates alike as a person whose ego far surpasses her limited intellect - spit the dummy in true ‘nobody loves me’ tantrum fashion following her failed bid earlier this week to win the presidency of the European Parliament - losing out to the popular German Pancake Tuesday Adventist Party candidate Fellattia van der Gamm.
Former EUSSR minister and Rotherham Labour MP Denis McScrote opined to one press hack from the Simony Gazette "By any standard of nepotism it is unacceptable that as one Lib-Dum MEP flounces out of the European Parliament because she got a huff on with this failed ego trip bid to get her pathetic arse elected to the Presidency of the European Parliament that she is automatically replaced by her own tosspot of a husband.”
“Alas, it always presents a problem when others fail to regard you with the same level of fawning worship as does the vanity mirror – but this ‘his and hers’ seats for lucrative MEP slots makes a mockery of Yorkshire's right to elect an MEP of their own choice – and the ball’s now in the court of the Lib-Dum leader – the incumbent Deputy Prime Minister Mick Clogg - to clear up this shameful mess of nepotistic pottage.”
Speaking in her own defence on Sky One’s ‘Fiddling Twats Hour’ - and denying rumours she had redefined the meaning of Nepotism with a large capital N - Wallis related that her bid for the EUSSR Presidency had been for reasons she deeply believed in – specifically the opportunity for self-aggrandisement and ego-massaging – plus the chance to feather her own retirement nest – but now her nose had been pushed out of joint she was stepping down to seek treatment for her chronic halitosis which she personally blamed for rejection in the Presidential post bid.
Dinsdale Spatchcock, the UK Independence Party MEP for Yorkshire and the Bumber, interviewed by the Daily Shitraker, stated that “Wallis is yet another example of menopausal maniacs in a position of political power – just like Angela Merkel. The very concept of her useless husband taking over her MEP seat is a working definition of nepotism – and further, the whole arrangement stinks of graft and corruption.”
“It’s bad enough she employs hubby - who’s a right bellend to start with - as a Parliamentary Assistant – yet another cushy ‘jobs for the boys’ position as her official gopher - running errands, going to the chippy and put the lotto on – and all paid for out of the public purse. Stewie was a former pothole inspector with the Bumber Council Highways Department until he was forced to resign and seek treatment due his self-destructive addiction to asphalt patch sniffing - and now Diana claims he can assume her seat in the European Parliament via succession by cognation or hereditary right. That’s a dodgy equation we don’t need – representation by a bloke that mainlines on Tarmac. Really, something definitely stinks in Denmark, and it isn’t Hamlet’s socks.”
“So, we’re left to speculate on what the egocentric bitch’s next move will be – take a page out of the Roman Catholic Church’s moral turpitude handbook and get into the simony market – and start flogging off benefices and indulgences on Amazon and e-Bay?”
Thought for the day. Within the Oxford English Dictionary’s indexed lexicon of 750,000-plus words there is none that accurately describes Diana Wallis - however it has been unanimously agreed by a conclave of Lib-Dum Party members and MEPs that the word CUNT comes pretty close.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Friday, 20 January 2012
UK Government Kibosh Torture Inquiry
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
A controversial high octane inquiry into allegations of wrongdoing by the UK's security services is to be shit-canned due the increasing exposure of the government and the MI5 / MI6 I-Spy institutions to international condemnation and prosecution for their collective sins and destined to be replaced with a decaffeinated review undertaken by the Met’s Plod Squad Authority under the chairmanship of Commissioner Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher.
Justice Secretary Ken ‘Flipper’ Clarke, founder of the pro-Conservative Rushcliffe Halitosis Society, informed one press hack from the Coverups Gazette that the inquiry into the alleged ‘mistreatment’ of political prisoners and suspected terrorist detainees (a euphemistic term for ‘human rights abuses’ and ‘torture’) could not continue as the evidence of culpability was unfairly stacked against the guilty parties involved.
The Detainee Inquiry, composed of retired High Court judge the Rt. Hon. Armitage Shanks, Sir Dinsdale Spatchcock QC, and Mrs Chlamydia Ffinch-Gargoyle was launched by PM Posh Dave Scameron in July 2010 to investigate allegations that MI5 and MI6 had been up to their usual brand of mischief by aiding and abetting the CIA with the rendition and ill-treatment of Muslim terrorism suspects - specifically Mohammed bin Patsy and his cohorts - in the wake of Mossad’s infamous false flag attacks on the World Trade Centre towers and the Pentagon on September 11th 2001.
When Scameron announced to the House of Conmans assembly that he intended to launch a fully independent inquiry into the top secret shenanigans of MI5 / MI6 – raising bouts of raucous laughter and hoots of disbelief from amused MPs - he stated for the Hansard record at the time that to ignore the claims of wrongdoing would simply serve to confirm the security services’ reputation of being fast, cheap and out of control as actual fact.
In response to Ken Clarke’s announcement that the Detainee Inquiry was to be scrapped and a Met Plod Squad Authority investigation take over the work, Amnesty International’s director Norma Duckfat yesterday opined to the media
“Fer fuck’s sake, here we go again. Scotland Yard took three effin’ years over lookin’ into the cases of Guantanamo Bay detainees – so how long is it gonna take them to fabricate a convincin’ cover-up of Vauxhall Cross’s litany of crimes against humanity?”
“The one toppin’ their list should be the case of Abdel Hakim Bellendi, a Turkish wheelbarrow mechanic and practicing Coptic Christian who was mistaken for Al Qaeda’s chief bomb maker, Shaheed al Ka-Boom and got his sad arse snatched off the street in Bangkok while he was on his holidays an’ shoved on an extraordinary rendition flight to Tripoli by a joint CIA and MI6 operation.”
“Now that incident should definitely get a mention in the big black Naughty Book as they were helpin’ Colonel Gaddafi round up his enemies – before he ended up in the number one spot of the Hit Parade himself.”
“Mr Bellendi claims British intelligence operatives in Libya usually called in to see him twice a week – normally just flying visits to rip a couple of his fingernails out and give him a good kicking while demanding to know the whereabouts of the Al Qaeda hierarchy.”
“Bellendi was held for a year-and-a-half in a cell with no room service, no internet access or facilities to order a take-out, and the only time he was able to have a bath and get a cold drink of water was during the daily water boarding sessions. Yes, eighteen months he was there getting the shit kicked out of him before some bright spark from the ‘intelligence’ services cottoned on to the fact he wasn’t an Arab or an Afghan – or a Muslim – or a muhijadeen terrorist.”
Thought for the day. Things could have turned out a lot worse for Mr Bellendi – especially if he’d been mistaken for a Brazilian electrician.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
A controversial high octane inquiry into allegations of wrongdoing by the UK's security services is to be shit-canned due the increasing exposure of the government and the MI5 / MI6 I-Spy institutions to international condemnation and prosecution for their collective sins and destined to be replaced with a decaffeinated review undertaken by the Met’s Plod Squad Authority under the chairmanship of Commissioner Genghis ‘Pitbull’ McGnasher.
Justice Secretary Ken ‘Flipper’ Clarke, founder of the pro-Conservative Rushcliffe Halitosis Society, informed one press hack from the Coverups Gazette that the inquiry into the alleged ‘mistreatment’ of political prisoners and suspected terrorist detainees (a euphemistic term for ‘human rights abuses’ and ‘torture’) could not continue as the evidence of culpability was unfairly stacked against the guilty parties involved.
The Detainee Inquiry, composed of retired High Court judge the Rt. Hon. Armitage Shanks, Sir Dinsdale Spatchcock QC, and Mrs Chlamydia Ffinch-Gargoyle was launched by PM Posh Dave Scameron in July 2010 to investigate allegations that MI5 and MI6 had been up to their usual brand of mischief by aiding and abetting the CIA with the rendition and ill-treatment of Muslim terrorism suspects - specifically Mohammed bin Patsy and his cohorts - in the wake of Mossad’s infamous false flag attacks on the World Trade Centre towers and the Pentagon on September 11th 2001.
When Scameron announced to the House of Conmans assembly that he intended to launch a fully independent inquiry into the top secret shenanigans of MI5 / MI6 – raising bouts of raucous laughter and hoots of disbelief from amused MPs - he stated for the Hansard record at the time that to ignore the claims of wrongdoing would simply serve to confirm the security services’ reputation of being fast, cheap and out of control as actual fact.
In response to Ken Clarke’s announcement that the Detainee Inquiry was to be scrapped and a Met Plod Squad Authority investigation take over the work, Amnesty International’s director Norma Duckfat yesterday opined to the media
“Fer fuck’s sake, here we go again. Scotland Yard took three effin’ years over lookin’ into the cases of Guantanamo Bay detainees – so how long is it gonna take them to fabricate a convincin’ cover-up of Vauxhall Cross’s litany of crimes against humanity?”
“The one toppin’ their list should be the case of Abdel Hakim Bellendi, a Turkish wheelbarrow mechanic and practicing Coptic Christian who was mistaken for Al Qaeda’s chief bomb maker, Shaheed al Ka-Boom and got his sad arse snatched off the street in Bangkok while he was on his holidays an’ shoved on an extraordinary rendition flight to Tripoli by a joint CIA and MI6 operation.”
“Now that incident should definitely get a mention in the big black Naughty Book as they were helpin’ Colonel Gaddafi round up his enemies – before he ended up in the number one spot of the Hit Parade himself.”
“Mr Bellendi claims British intelligence operatives in Libya usually called in to see him twice a week – normally just flying visits to rip a couple of his fingernails out and give him a good kicking while demanding to know the whereabouts of the Al Qaeda hierarchy.”
“Bellendi was held for a year-and-a-half in a cell with no room service, no internet access or facilities to order a take-out, and the only time he was able to have a bath and get a cold drink of water was during the daily water boarding sessions. Yes, eighteen months he was there getting the shit kicked out of him before some bright spark from the ‘intelligence’ services cottoned on to the fact he wasn’t an Arab or an Afghan – or a Muslim – or a muhijadeen terrorist.”
Thought for the day. Things could have turned out a lot worse for Mr Bellendi – especially if he’d been mistaken for a Brazilian electrician.
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
Thursday, 19 January 2012
Manky Mossad Targets Boycott Campaigners
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.
A volunteer organizer with the pro-Palestinian ‘Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions’ (BDS) campaign’s French wing, Mlle. Sapphie Godermiche, was sorting the mail last week in their Paris office and opened one envelope containing a sheaf of death threats written in both gutter Arabic and schoolboy French – and coated with a noxious white powder.
Being alarmed by the incident, especially the fact that the powder glowed in the dark, Mlle Godermiche immediately proceeded to a neighbouring medical clinic. The duty doctor – on noticing his patient was bleeding profusely from her ears, nose and gums – and weeping tears of blood as she watched her hair fall out in clumps while listening to the hospital’s Geiger counter clicking away at a ‘Flight of the Bumblebee’ tempo - ordered her immediate quarantine – in one of the facility’s lead-lined X-Ray rooms.
After being dutifully alerted by hospital staff the Groupe d'Intervention de la Gendarmerie Nationale (anti-terrorist unit) and other specialist police brigades, plus inspectors from the Paris offices of the IAEA – descended on the BDS offices in bio-rad hazard suits and seized the contaminated correspondence and envelope – which, following forensic examination, was found to contain enriched weapons-grade U-235 uranium in a pulverised, 37 micron form.
Inspector Pierre le Mott, chief of the GIGN team, informed one press hack from Le Merde that “These threats – and now too actual attacks - are the latest in a series of unpunished acts by pro-Israel militias involving the display of racist graffiti and posters at the Centre International de la Culture Populaire – which serves as the headquarters of several associations in the Palestine solidarity movement – including the affected BDS group personnel.”
“Looking at the evidence of today’s attack these anti-Islamist shits have now gone viral and intend to start a wave of physical assaults on the pro-Palestinian activists by using radioactive materials – so we can only speculate that their next offensive might involve a false flag strike like 9/11 by detonating a dirty bomb – and doubtless blaming it on Iranian terrorists and the fictitious Mohammed al Patsy.”
“But what can we expect when this little arsehole of a President of ours, the ZioNazi ‘sayan’ prick Sarkozy, gets his orders from Tel Aviv and the Rothshite crime syndicate and has given the go-ahead to prosecutors to falsely and outrageously charge the BDS campaign activists with inciting racial hatred, anti-Semitism – and also Holohoax denial.”
“Fortunately our courts have resisted the pressure applied by that poison dwarf Sarkozy and the Israeli embassy – and too a plethora of like Zionist groups out to suppress the boycott of Israeli apartheid by legal means. However, it now appears that the psychopathic supporters of the rogue state of Israel’s policy of Manifest Destiny colonialism - stealing every tiny bit of land the dispossessed Palestinians are left with – have decided to turn to violent actions.”
Meanwhile, back at the GIGN HQ forensics lab, it was determined that the envelope used to package and deliver the contaminated threat letter bore an Iranian postage stamp – one unfortunately bearing the 1975 issue image of His Royal Ruthlessness, Shah Reza Palaver – but with a Royal Mail franking mark indicating the letter was posted in Luton, UK earlier that week.
Applying the technique of the Doctrine of Signatures in the analysis of the offending U-235 it was determined to have originated in the reactor of Israel’s Dimona nuclear weapons plant in the Negev Desert.
The GIGN’s Inspector le Mott took up the story again “This envelope was posted in Broken Britain, not Iran – and some moron had pasted on a stamp with the overthrown Shah’s portrait on it – obviously filched from a stamp album. Then we have this threatening letter – written in fractured Arabic with back-to-front grammar as though cobbled together from a phrase book or dictionary – which is a dead give away that it didn’t originate in Iran as they’re Farsi speakers – not Arabic. Thus this concocted intrigue to throw the blame onto the agents of Iran by implying the U-235 came from their Bushehr 1 reactor or the Natanz nuclear enrichment facility has fallen flat on its arse.”
“Our compadres in MI5 have determined the envelope came from a branch of WH Smith in Luton, which coincidentally happens to be the base for the pro-Israeli English Defence League – who are completely funded by the Rothshite banksters and whose sole purpose for existence is to promote and spread the disease of Islamophobia. They are a racist organisation whose main activity was pro-hatred street demonstrations against the Muslim community – and now appears that they are going nuclear in their ambitions with the help of their Mossad controllers.”
“You know what their political credo is? - Peacefully Protesting Against Anyone Who Dares Criticise Israel. So I ask you, what has defending England got to do with launching terrorist attacks on people who criticise the neo-Nazi state of Israel for the litany of war crimes and human rights and wrongs abuses they visit on the poor Palestinian people – besieged behind their Great Apartheid Walls in the biggest concentration camps on the planet?”
“The British intelligence service and police are now investigating links connecting the EDL to this radioactive threat letter posted from Luton to the BDS office in Paris. Already they have discovered a recent wire transfer from Israel’s Ministry for the Expropriation of Palestinian Lands to the EDL’s bank account in Luton – so we know that the PM Bobo Nuttyahoo and his Knesset kikesters are involved.”
Conversely the English Defence League’s head honcho – career hooligan and self-styled ‘hardman’ Tommy ‘Tourettes’ Robinson, (aka Stephen Yaxley-Lennon) a former landfill warden and seagull strangler and now owner / operator of the Luton-based Tammy Tumour’s Tanning Parlour - was interviewed by the media at the EDL’s Luton HQ in Scumborough Hamlets, where he informed one press hack from the Xenophobes Gazette that “It’s all a pile of effin’ bollocks tryin’ ter blame us cos some French slut got snuffed wiv some radioactive shite. So, where’s she bin fer her fuckin’ holidays, I’d like ter know – lyin’ on the beach at effin’ Chernobyl?”
Thought for the day. Are you supporting the pro-Palestinian Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign that targets goods marketed by the illegal state of Israel? Is your ‘boycott’ effort confined to Uzi sub-machine guns and Galil assault rifles or does it also include a determined refusal to buy Jaffa oranges and kosher matzo or send out Hanukkah cards?
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
A volunteer organizer with the pro-Palestinian ‘Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions’ (BDS) campaign’s French wing, Mlle. Sapphie Godermiche, was sorting the mail last week in their Paris office and opened one envelope containing a sheaf of death threats written in both gutter Arabic and schoolboy French – and coated with a noxious white powder.
Being alarmed by the incident, especially the fact that the powder glowed in the dark, Mlle Godermiche immediately proceeded to a neighbouring medical clinic. The duty doctor – on noticing his patient was bleeding profusely from her ears, nose and gums – and weeping tears of blood as she watched her hair fall out in clumps while listening to the hospital’s Geiger counter clicking away at a ‘Flight of the Bumblebee’ tempo - ordered her immediate quarantine – in one of the facility’s lead-lined X-Ray rooms.
After being dutifully alerted by hospital staff the Groupe d'Intervention de la Gendarmerie Nationale (anti-terrorist unit) and other specialist police brigades, plus inspectors from the Paris offices of the IAEA – descended on the BDS offices in bio-rad hazard suits and seized the contaminated correspondence and envelope – which, following forensic examination, was found to contain enriched weapons-grade U-235 uranium in a pulverised, 37 micron form.
Inspector Pierre le Mott, chief of the GIGN team, informed one press hack from Le Merde that “These threats – and now too actual attacks - are the latest in a series of unpunished acts by pro-Israel militias involving the display of racist graffiti and posters at the Centre International de la Culture Populaire – which serves as the headquarters of several associations in the Palestine solidarity movement – including the affected BDS group personnel.”
“Looking at the evidence of today’s attack these anti-Islamist shits have now gone viral and intend to start a wave of physical assaults on the pro-Palestinian activists by using radioactive materials – so we can only speculate that their next offensive might involve a false flag strike like 9/11 by detonating a dirty bomb – and doubtless blaming it on Iranian terrorists and the fictitious Mohammed al Patsy.”
“But what can we expect when this little arsehole of a President of ours, the ZioNazi ‘sayan’ prick Sarkozy, gets his orders from Tel Aviv and the Rothshite crime syndicate and has given the go-ahead to prosecutors to falsely and outrageously charge the BDS campaign activists with inciting racial hatred, anti-Semitism – and also Holohoax denial.”
“Fortunately our courts have resisted the pressure applied by that poison dwarf Sarkozy and the Israeli embassy – and too a plethora of like Zionist groups out to suppress the boycott of Israeli apartheid by legal means. However, it now appears that the psychopathic supporters of the rogue state of Israel’s policy of Manifest Destiny colonialism - stealing every tiny bit of land the dispossessed Palestinians are left with – have decided to turn to violent actions.”
Meanwhile, back at the GIGN HQ forensics lab, it was determined that the envelope used to package and deliver the contaminated threat letter bore an Iranian postage stamp – one unfortunately bearing the 1975 issue image of His Royal Ruthlessness, Shah Reza Palaver – but with a Royal Mail franking mark indicating the letter was posted in Luton, UK earlier that week.
Applying the technique of the Doctrine of Signatures in the analysis of the offending U-235 it was determined to have originated in the reactor of Israel’s Dimona nuclear weapons plant in the Negev Desert.
The GIGN’s Inspector le Mott took up the story again “This envelope was posted in Broken Britain, not Iran – and some moron had pasted on a stamp with the overthrown Shah’s portrait on it – obviously filched from a stamp album. Then we have this threatening letter – written in fractured Arabic with back-to-front grammar as though cobbled together from a phrase book or dictionary – which is a dead give away that it didn’t originate in Iran as they’re Farsi speakers – not Arabic. Thus this concocted intrigue to throw the blame onto the agents of Iran by implying the U-235 came from their Bushehr 1 reactor or the Natanz nuclear enrichment facility has fallen flat on its arse.”
“Our compadres in MI5 have determined the envelope came from a branch of WH Smith in Luton, which coincidentally happens to be the base for the pro-Israeli English Defence League – who are completely funded by the Rothshite banksters and whose sole purpose for existence is to promote and spread the disease of Islamophobia. They are a racist organisation whose main activity was pro-hatred street demonstrations against the Muslim community – and now appears that they are going nuclear in their ambitions with the help of their Mossad controllers.”
“You know what their political credo is? - Peacefully Protesting Against Anyone Who Dares Criticise Israel. So I ask you, what has defending England got to do with launching terrorist attacks on people who criticise the neo-Nazi state of Israel for the litany of war crimes and human rights and wrongs abuses they visit on the poor Palestinian people – besieged behind their Great Apartheid Walls in the biggest concentration camps on the planet?”
“The British intelligence service and police are now investigating links connecting the EDL to this radioactive threat letter posted from Luton to the BDS office in Paris. Already they have discovered a recent wire transfer from Israel’s Ministry for the Expropriation of Palestinian Lands to the EDL’s bank account in Luton – so we know that the PM Bobo Nuttyahoo and his Knesset kikesters are involved.”
Conversely the English Defence League’s head honcho – career hooligan and self-styled ‘hardman’ Tommy ‘Tourettes’ Robinson, (aka Stephen Yaxley-Lennon) a former landfill warden and seagull strangler and now owner / operator of the Luton-based Tammy Tumour’s Tanning Parlour - was interviewed by the media at the EDL’s Luton HQ in Scumborough Hamlets, where he informed one press hack from the Xenophobes Gazette that “It’s all a pile of effin’ bollocks tryin’ ter blame us cos some French slut got snuffed wiv some radioactive shite. So, where’s she bin fer her fuckin’ holidays, I’d like ter know – lyin’ on the beach at effin’ Chernobyl?”
Thought for the day. Are you supporting the pro-Palestinian Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign that targets goods marketed by the illegal state of Israel? Is your ‘boycott’ effort confined to Uzi sub-machine guns and Galil assault rifles or does it also include a determined refusal to buy Jaffa oranges and kosher matzo or send out Hanukkah cards?
Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.
Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.
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