Kettle Calls Frying Pan ‘Black Arse’

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The dumpty dwarf Deputy Labour leader, Harriet ‘Stabvest’ Harman, has launched a withering attack on the Librarian Dummercrats at her party's Scottish conference.
Speaking to Jock delegates in the legalised kiddie fiddling paradise of Aberdeen, the ginger-mingin MP for London’s ‘Yardie Central’ and ‘419 Hamlets’ totally missed the irony of her hypocritical comments when she branded the Libservative Coalition’s ‘Chief Piggy Bank Minder’ Danny Alexander as a "ginger mingin rodent".

The ranga Harman bitch, obviously suffering one of her frequent bouts of narcissistic delusion and allowing ego to surpass intellect yet again, was the interim Leader of the Labour Party (and Leader of the Opposition) from the 11th May to 25th September 2010, until Edwina Millipede, the more dominant member of the unsavoury Millipede twins, took over the role as Chief Commissar – bent on righting the mistakes of the Bliar-Broon era of political incompetence and war-mongering legerdemain - and returning Britain to a full socialist state.

Obviously avoiding looking in a mirror, the Harman beast stepped deeper into the cesspit of hypocrisy when she went on to pronounce for the public record that the Lib-Dum Party in bonny Scotland had become no less than Frankenstein-type 'political mutants' after joining a coalition with Conservatives – and urged delegates to ensure Labour claimed victory at next May's crooked Holyrood election.

Harman further commented that in her unqualified and arrogant opinion (which ranks more at scent than substance) many people who voted for the Lib-Dums last May believed they were a progressive anti-Tory party and not up for a treacherous coalition with them – wholly overlooking the duplicitous fact that her old boss Gordon ‘Culpability’ Broon was in discussions with Lib-Dum leader Mick Clogg for days attempting to cobble together a workable coalition agreement prior to them siding with the Tories.

Harman blathered on to say “Scots woke up to see Mick Clogg with Posh Dave Scameron in bed together at Number 10 – after poor Gordon had been booted out by the bailiffs.”
Obviously Harman failed to realise she was pontificating to the Labour Party faithful and not the common or garden Scottish voter, who have had as big a fill of Labour government abuses and incompetence after 13 years as their English and Welsh neighbours – and thus prefer Lib-Dum or Tory – or Pancake Tuesday Greenies to anything Labour have to offer.

Talking through her arse yet again, Harman insisted Labour have now learned the lessons of their general election defeat – don’t front up war-mongering lying bastard Zionist puppets like Tony Bliar, dour Scots clots like Broon – or sneak in snidey sodomites such as Vermin in Ermine – Lord Peter Scandalson – all of which are abhorrent to the British palate.

While having no personal affiliation with Scotland whatsoever, apart from the fact she once attended a brown-nosing bum-kissing ceremony at Balmoral, Harman went into her customary vicious back-stabbing mode, stating she was incredulous at seeing Danny Alexander, a true born and bred Scot, and MP for the Inverness constituency, becoming the front-man for the Coalitions public spending budget cuts.
“Many of us in the Labour Party are conservationists and all love Roland Rat and red squirrels - but there's one ginger mingin rodent which we never want to see again up here in the highlands – that freckled poofter Danny Alexander."

The Librarian-Dummercrat MP Alexander has repeatedly denied press rumours that he’s a raving gaylord, claiming he’s not taken it up the arse since leaving public school – and supports this claim by extolling the fact he’s married to a female of the species - aptly named ‘Rebecca Whore’

Conversely, and perhaps explaining Mrs Stabvest’s unprovoked attack on the Libservative Piggy Bank Minder, the gospel according to the Backstabbers Gazette maintains that Harman has had it in for Danny the Deviant since a politically-incorrect occasion in the House of Conmans cafeteria one lunchtime when they were sat spooning out of opposite troughs, she with skirt-clad legs visible – prompting him to comment her varicose veins reminded him of a map of South America’s river systems.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of slanderous innuendo.