Saturday, 8 December 2012

Ethnic Women Slam UK Job Barriers

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

An editorial in this week’s Xenophobes Gazette claims UK-based ethnic minority women face discrimination at every stage of the employment recruiting process – even when applying for a job in a brothel or Happy Ending rub n tug massage parlour.

Ms N’dinga Wormhole Chuckabutty, a 22-year-old perma sun-tanned Nigerian high school graduate with an NVQ II diploma in Advanced Welfare Benefit Fraud, now living in London, spent four months applying for jobs around the metropolis but elicited zero responses from the major companies, with last resort placement offers from the minimum wage likes of the Pestco, Pukesburys and Mammon & Snobfords ‘Greedy Grocer’ supermarkets and the prestigious Pond Stretcher store chain limited to unpaid work experience.

Then a careers adviser suggested Ms Chuckabutty ‘whiten’ her CV and drop the first name N’dinga, to adopt a more Anglocentric moniker – such as the ever-popular slapper tags of Bev, Sue or Liz – and days later received job offers from a fossil fuel merchant on the lookout for a coal heaver’s mate - along with an immediate starts as a scaffolder in Bristol; a mine clearing assistant in Cambodia – and a penguin census officer on Antarctica’s Ross Ice Shelf.

According to the All Party Parliamentary Group for Darkie Affairs 2011 report, unemployment statistics among ethnic minority women have remained consistently higher than for white women since the Norman Conquest (circa 1066) – with the overall unemployment rate for them standing at a shocking 24.3% compared with 6.8% for white women – while among non-English speaking Balkans Pikey and Gyppo females it rose to 40.5%.

Scabby Acrobati, director of the Twat-Watch civil rights charity, informed one press hack from the Jingoists Review that “Okay, I realise a lot of split-arsed Muslim immigrants coming here from Pakiland are filing complaints with the Equalities Commission regarding this supposed ‘double jeopardy’ factor involving both gender and ethnicity discrimination when they’re turned down for job - but who can blame the human resources interviewer when the applicant’s sat opposite them wearing a burka and all they can see of their face – or entire person in fact – is a slit in the niqab veil and a pair of bloodshot eyes.”

“Really, this might sound like some kind of joke, but how do they know who’s hiding under there. It might be some one-eyed, hook-handed radical Islamic cleric with an attitude problem just looking for an opportunity to blow up our democratic freedoms.”

“Okay, perhaps there is a deep-rooted and historic culture of racism inherent in British society that might even pre-date Empire’s Day and date back to the Viking invasions, but these ethnic minority women should just take a look at their Asian contemporaries who’ve reached the peak of political office here and become peers of the realm – such as the Paki ex-Tory chairwoman Baroness Seedy Warthog - and her New Labour party buddy from Bangladesh, Baroness Polo Udders - who would still be sat in the House of Lords if she hadn’t been so sodding greedy and ripped off her parliamentary expense account for £125,000 quid.”

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references along with lashings of cynicism and bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Read the actual newspaper piece on this one. She changed her named like Rusty said but when she turned up for the interview they actually told her she needed to 'whiten up' her act and look more British even though she was a West Indian.