NHS Tops Britain’s ‘Broke’ List

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Along with the Rothshite crime syndicate’s not-fit-for-purpose fractional reserve lending banking system and the criminally-corrupt social care child welfare administration – plus the rest of our once-sceptred isle’s Masonic pervert and sexual deviant-ridden festering establishment’s officialdom – the now-privatised National Ill-Health Service is topping this week’s ‘most broken’ list of national fubar’s and snafu’s.

Like the classic fairy tale prefix goes – ‘once upon a time’ - we had an NHS system which worked a treat – then the moronic powers that be went against the long-proven adage of ‘if it ain’t broke, then don’t fix it ‘– and promptly broke it – converting the mess of pottage into our current National Ill-Health Service - a PFI-run series of untrustworthy, profit-motivated free market enterprise ‘Trusts’ that are in cahoots with Big Pharma to pawn the hapless common herd patients off with any old shit to ‘treat’ a symptom but not cure it – for after all, there’s no profit in cure, only in treatment – and this factor applies too with the useless mercury-laden toxic vaccines that immunise against sweet fuck all but work to compromise a kid’s immune system and cause a variety of ills – not least of which is autism.

Hence the longer a chronic symptom receives a regime of expensive medical palliatives then the greater the profit (cancer/chemo) – and for those pesky ‘hopeless cases’ there’s always the reliable Liverpool Care Pathway (Scouse Assisted Suicide System) – previously referred to as ‘murder’ – plus a diversity of investment into body bag supplies and funeral services ensures that profit runs all the way to the six-foot-under patient write-off status.

So small wonder the burgeoning litany of official complaints regarding this piss poor NHS system are now endemic in their expansive proportions – with gripes and grumbles - and lawsuits - ranging from patients contracting MRSA and other minor plague infections from the manky magazines spread around family GP surgeries to actual hospital ward levels where a case of trench foot has ended up being diagnosed as a brain tumour - to say nothing of certain hospital’s associated mortuary facilities concerning acts of necrophilia committed on the corpses of deceased loved ones by celebrity DJs – and too the occasional Tory cabinet minister.

The Health Service Ombudsman, actually a one-man outfit, informed a press hack from the Euthanasia Gazette that the NHS needed a cultural change in the way it treated patients as many claimed their pets got better attention and care at their local veterinarian clinics than they received at the Harold Shipman Centre for Excellence in Health Care in Smegmadale.

Typical of our ‘Broken Britain’ society, the Ombudsman is the last port of call for patients – or their surviving relatives - unhappy with NHS care or how a complaint had been handled – normally by tossing it into the nearest trashcan and telling the concerned party to ‘fuck off’ – especially so when professional incompetence has resulted in patient deaths and the smell of compensation’s in the air.

In all, the Ombudsman received 16,333 complaints for the 2011-2012 period – with 11,000 of those redirected to other concerned organisations – such as the police or Crown Prosecution Service - or local grave-digger - or were re-circulated back into the NHS complaints system – where they were consigned straight into the nearest trashcan.

A further 1,000 complaints were withdrawn after the patients got fed up with their lack of NHS care and being treated by Jedward-double incompetents who droned on and pontificated like Bono – so opted for a one-way trip to the Dignitas Clinic in Zurich – with the Ombudsman investigating a total of 4,390 cases before coming down with an acute case of Charmaid's Knee and passing away unexpectedly at the age of 43 while a patient at the Freddy Patel Institute for Medical Guessology.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.