Monday, 4 April 2011

William Vague Gets Vaguer

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The gospel according to the UK’s Foreign Secretary, William Vague, who foolishly ignored the age-old maxim of engaging brain before opening mouth, and waiting until 20/20 hindsight might be applied to the developing civil war, has stated the military intervention in Libya will not end in a stalemate as Gaddafi's regime has no future due it being surrounded by a Zionist US-led coalition of Euro- American bullies out to impose their unique brand of hegemony via a spot of neo-imperial aggression to gain control of the nation’s natural resources and bestow the blessings of democracy and Christianity on the oppressed population of toe-rag Tuaregs and Bolshie Bedouins.

Interviewed on the BBC’s Andrew ‘Bat-Ears’ Marr show about the danger of a military stalemate between pro-Gaddafi forces and rebels, the moronic Vague, a man who still thinks wood grows on trees, went in feet first, ready to impale himself on his own boasts, and declared there was no future for Libya under its current leadership.
"Let's be clear, if the Libyan regime tries to hang on in this situation, with NATO bombing the living shit out of the place and being blockaded by sea, they can't do business and sell any oil – unless they set up a bucket chain and lug it across the Sahara.”

Conversely to whatever the intellectually-challenged Vague’s mental processes might conjure up, a poll conducted by the Warmongers Gazette suggested that 90% of people believed Britain's military involvement in Libya would prove to be yet another colossal snafu – just like Iraq and Afghanistan.

Of the 2,000,000 people polled, 25% reckoned the UK's involvement in Libya might be over by Christmas - of 2015, while just 10% chose the option "serves the twats right – this is payback for Lockerbie – and be over even quicker if they nuke the place" - with the remaining 64% of canny street-smart Brits - unlike the Libservative government - coming clean and admitting they didn’t have a fucking clue how long the madness would continue.

Vague, who proved himself an unmitigated disaster as Tory Party leader, denied a newspaper report that 600 Royal Marine cabbage heads had been deployed in Libya and got their sad arses captured by a bunch of goat herders – in a repeat of the similar circumstances when a mix n match squad of MI6 agents and elite 22nd SAS Regiment troopers were collared at the Ras al Nastygit oasis by a gang of AK-47-weilding juvenile shepherds, and unceremoniously disarmed and arrested, then deported by rebel immigration authorities for being in the country without valid ‘agent provocateur’ visas.

However Vague maintained this was simply grist from the rumour mill and the 600 Marines were in fact preparing for an exercise elsewhere – speculatively the invasion of Syria or Iran - following the scheduled and imminent false flag nuke attack on US soil – and most definitely not mustered to guard the defected Libyan Foreign Minister, Moussa Koussa, a former member of the Mathaba – the Libyan Bureau for External Security – who still insists that is his real name and not some kind of a joke.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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