Friday, 29 April 2011

Barky’s New Birth Cert’ Better Class of Forgery

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

US President Barky Hussein O’Barmy, the dodgy Kenyan Muslim cuckoo squatting in the White House and impersonating an Ivy League-educated Christian American, has finally caved to pressure and displayed a brand spanking new copy of his phoney ‘Hawaiian’ birth certificate.

The Washington press corps were sympathetic and too, overtly supportive, with the consensus being “Well, at least it’s a more professional bit of counterfeiting than the previous one – which stuck out like a sore thumb, with the words ‘Kenya’ and ‘Nairobi’ amateurishly deleted with typex fluid, then ‘Hawaii’ and ‘Kapiolani’ scribbled in with pencil.”

The Shite House hopes the move, which comes after interminable months of negative speculation, will be a final blow to the so-called 'birther' movement which maintains the President was born in Darkest Africa and has as much right to be the US President as does that other celebrity muppet - Kermit the Frog.

However, the three year delay in actually producing a copy of the document is being viewed by Barky’s detractors as a most definite sign of dirty dealing and leaves the President open to accusations that the birth certificate produced now is yet another prime example of masterclass forgery by the CIA’s or Mossad’s superb counterfeiting artists.

Conversely, Pres’ O’Barmy told one reporter from the Scamsters Gazette “This ‘birthers’ issue has been going on since Georgie Soros and Brzezinski proposed me as a Presidential candidate, and then they sat back and watched with laughable bemusement how easy it was to get elected without even producing a fucking birth certificate – further compounded by the stupidity of the American public and political establishment for allowing me to take the oath of office - only in America, baby.”

“So, to kill the controversy and keep everybody and their dog happy when I run for a second term, we’ve posted the Hawaiian certificate on my Facebook page as I’ve more important things to do – like dealing with issues that are vital to Baron Rothshite and Tel Aviv – and preparing for the invasions of Syria and Iran and kick starting World War III with China the via the medium of our ‘Iraq 2’ military actions against Libya. Then the anti-Gaddafi revolutionary forces keep control of the oil and gas resources, and we slam the door of opportunity and commerce in China’s face in our first move to shove their pesky competitive noses out of Africa altogether.”

“Now that should scotch the nasty rumours that claim the only reason behind our attacks against the Arab Muslim world is revenge for losing the Holy Land Crusades to the Saracens 800 years ago – even if the same is true of our HAARP earthquake attack on Haiti and the ‘humanitarian aid’ invasion – as payback for kicking our honky imperialist French buddies out in 1804. Believe me, the Illuminati kikesters never forget a slight.”

Alas, regardless of finally presenting this shoddy hoax of a scanned birth certificate for public viewing as the legitimising factor for his Presidency, Barky is still hobbled by a swathe of credibility issues of Biblical proportions concerning both his domestic and foreign policy objectives.
Primarily these include his kikester-infested administration’s deliberate refusal to question Israeli human rights violations against the Palestinian populations of the West Bank and Gaza – and the wholesale murder of Freedom Flotilla peace activists - juxtaposed with his broken campaign trail promise to close down the iniquitous Camp VI Guantanamo Bay terrorist detention facility in Cuba – an abomination whose entrance gateway sign bears the grossly hypocritical motto of ‘Honor (sic) Bound to Defend Freedom’.

While the White House’s venal agenda is transparently obvious to all and sundry as being determined and set by AIPAC and the Wall Street kikesters – O’Barmy’s own mental competence, (or rather lack of such) stricken by the Bell Curve Syndrome and the fact he can’t deliver his laughable Hope and Change speeches (which amount to no more than an insult to the voting public’s intelligence) without the aid of an ear-piece cue and the ubiquitous teleprompter – call into question his suitability and qualifications to sit behind the Oval office desk.

Thought for the day: So, the media have been warned off regarding the conflicting evidence elicited from his Auntie Winnebago Jaffacake in Mombassa, to quote: “Dat little Barky boy, coffee wid cream, he’s de son of ma brudder an’ his honky bitch Annie an’ woz born here in Kenya, in our old village of Nyang’oma Kogelo. Now why he wanna say he woz born in dis Hawaii place is a snub on us an’ all of Africa if he’s denying his banana-munchin’ brudders an’ sistas.”

Alas, Barky’s just another stooge and a pawn in a long line of the ZioNazi Rothshite crime syndicate’s puppets, obeying his Master’s voice - lest he gets 'Grassy Knolled'.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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