Qatar Conflab to Plot Gaddafi Ouster

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

An international summit of Western ZioNazi scumbags out to push the greed-fuelled aims of the Project for a New American Century have joined with a choice selection of despotic Arab muppet regime rulers and gone into conclave in the postage stamp emirate of Qatar – the one that resembles a blot of flyshit on a world map.

The intent and purpose is to apply their limited intellects to the problem of how the fuck to get rid of (read unseat or assassinate) the titular leader of the sovereign state of Libya under the pretence of ‘protecting’ the oil-rich nation’s civilians from the current topsy-turvy military conflict (a euphemism for 'civil war') - and save them from becoming yet another set of ‘collateral damage statistics’ on the neo-imperialist’s record books.

Qatar's ruler, Sheikh Fizzy al-Kaseltzer, interviewed on the BBC’s Despot’s Hour, said every day that passed meant more pro-democracy rebels were getting snuffed by Gaddafi’s army and going off to Paradise where they’d claim their 72 virgins each – which meant that very soon there’d be no virgins left to go round.

Ahead of the meeting, the French and British foreign ministers told one press hack from the Warmongers Gazette that NATO should be doing more in Libya to topple the Gaddafi regime and not be hampered by the simple no-fly zone restrictions of the UN’s Resolution 1973.

Willy Vague, the dog-wanking British Foreign Secretary, who has the military experience of Captain Snort, the commanding officer of Camberwick Green’s Pippin Fort, with his customary unqualified arrogance, is preaching strategy and tactics wholly inapplicable to the socio-political situation in Libya.

"What may appear at the moment a military deadlock is not so in the world of diplomacy and sanctions - and the leper colony style isolation of the regime should tell them that recognition of the Gaddafi-led government has no long-term future while we keep bombing their tanks.”
“I can’t predict when these NATO operations will end but the air strikes so far have saved thousands of lives – apart from the acceptable numbers of rebel forces and civilians accidentally hit by friendly fire to date. And let’s not start on about the depleted uranium in all the missiles and bombs we’ve fired and dropped having a knock-on effect with women having kids that look like Blinkie the fish - the same as in Iraq.”

Dutch Brig Gen Mork van Shcumm, head of NATO operations in Libya, told a reporter from the Body Bag Review that he felt NATO was doing well with the limited military assets at their disposal.
“We have established a no-fly zone, and are protecting the majority of civilians who have the sense to keep their heads down and not peeping around corners and through windows every five minutes like fatally-curious meerkat creatures.”

“While our air strikes have so far failed to tip the military balance decisively against Col Gaddafi's regime, we did destroy all three McDonalds halal chew n spew fast food outlets in downtown Tripoli and have thus upset the military’s food chain supply line. We further think we’ve managed to enforce an arms embargo and will be discussing while here in Qatar whether to stretch the parameters of the UN resolution and arm the rebels with tactical nuclear warheads.”

However, supposition and boasts aside, the only way NATO – or any other fucker and their dog - are going to unseat Gaddafi is by force of arms and that means wholly ignoring the statutes and limitations of the UN’s ‘No-Fly Zone’ Resolution 1973 and committing the involvement of battle-hardened Western troops to sort out and re-arm the rabble that currently represents the pro-democracy (sic) ‘rebel militia’ and face the government’s forces on the ground – thus take pot luck with 50/50 odds of creating yet another Afghan-style 'war without end' quagmire.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.