Romney on Kiss-Ass-a-Thon Tour

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Mitt ‘The Moron’ Romney, in Jerusalem over the weekend on a servile ass-kissing mission, held talks with Israeli PM Bobo Nuttyahoo and President Shitbag Peres, during which he pledged to forge closer ties between the US and Israel in the hope of burnishing his pro-Zionist muppet credentials to help secure the US-based kikester vote around key constituencies in November and get himself elected as the good ole US of A’s 45th President.

The credibility-deficiency Romney, obviously the best the GOP can muster as their Republican candidate to hoof the Kenyan cuckoo out of the White House in the coming election, hyped up the Iranophobia rhetoric by informing a press hack from the Warmongers Gazette that he would uphold any decision by Israel to use pre-emptive military force to prevent the Islamic Republic from developing a nuclear weapon – whether the Ayatollahs were building one or not.

“Okay, these bleedin’ hearts in Europe are sayin’ that under international agreements Iran is entitled to enrich all the uranium they need for their domestic power nuclear reactors an’ medical research” – an’ I say No - seein’ the Pakis already have a nuke arsenal, we have a God-given immoral duty to put a stop to uranium enrichment by any more heathen Muslim states as they’ll build a bomb an’ keep it a secret – until they drop it on Tel Aviv.”

Nice one Mitt, but obviously no support forthcoming on your behalf for the international peaceniks bid to make a nuclear-armed Israel sign the Non-Proliferation Treaty or stop playing smarmy twats and let the IAEA inspect their Dimona Nuclear plant for any sign of the nuclear weapons they boast, with a sly wink, that they don’t have.

The academically-deficient Romney, a man possessed by ambitions far beyond the scope of his limited intellectual abilities, confided to Nuttyahoo and Peres that he shared their concerns with the development of Iran's nuclear capabilities, opining that "The threat it would pose to you guys, the entire Middle East an’ the world is unacceptable as there can be only one nuclear power here, an’ that’s just gotta be Israel."
“No shit, if they develop nuclear weapons then they’re up to challengin’ Israel’s regional military hegemony, with you being the sole possessor of nuclear weapons.”

Romney, accompanied by his number one spin doctor and foreign policy adviser Sheldon Addledscum, told one press hack from the Pound of Flesh Review that President Obama has undermined Israel by supporting their enemies.
“Old Barky’s spent too much time pissin’ around with forged birth certificates an’ issuin’ sanctions on Iran instead of rattlin’ his sabre more an’ bombin’ the shit outa Tehran - an’ he ain’t bin kissin’ enough Shylock ass ter get the kikester votes this time around.”

"If Israel has to pull its usual stunt an’ ignore the niceties of international law to stop Iran from developing the bomb by launching a pre-emptive attack on the crazy old Ayatollahs an’ that President Ahmadashell guy, then that’s okay with me – an’ Syria and Hezbollah an’ anyone else they fancy attackin’ too. What’s more, if they can hang on until mid-January when I take over in the White House, then I’ll have the Pentagon boys give them a helpin’ hand.”

“Hey, these guys are God’s Chosen people, an’ even me, bein’ brought up as a member of the Jesus Christ Church of Latter Day Morons in Utah, can appreciate that fact – an’ hellfire, we’re the lost tribe of Israel an’ their brothers anyways – an’ that’s embroidered on my underpants.”

After his meetings with Israeli officials, Romney visited Jerusalem's holy Al Buraq (Wailing Wall) site and banged his bonce a few times against the ancient masonry – to no apparent ill-effect, then used the photo-shoot opportunity to inform media hacks “Hey, if that anti-Semite Holohoax denier Ron Paul had grabbed the Republican nomination then he’d be cheerin’ the Iranian terrorist state on - an’ cuttin’ off any more military aid to Israel until they sorted themselves out with these Palestinian refugee guys an’ stop all the illegal settlement building.”

“Personally I’m all in favour of their settlements in the occupied West Bank – an’ keepin’ Hamas an’ their Gaza Gangsters bottled up behind the 30-foot high wall the IDF have built around the Strip, as this is their Promised Land, given to them by Jehovah.”

However, Romney’s coup de grâce howler came at a fund-raising matzo eating contest in Jerusalem on Monday where he claimed that a lack of culture was the cause of the Palestinians inferiority to the Israeli people.
Using prepared quotes from David Landes ‘The Wealth and Poverty of Nations’, Romney sought to justify how Israel had achieved greater prosperity than their marginalised Palestinian neighbours – totally missing out on the point that the entire country was stolen from them in 1948 and what bits they were left with have since been sub-divided into the rapidly diminishing occupied West Bank and the besieged Gaza Strip.

Oh well, as it’s not going to be Ron Paul this time around it’s either more of the same with Barky O’Barmy – or Romney - another dishonest Zionist stooge who couldn’t tell the truth if he didn’t have a lie ready. Hmmm, not so much a matter of God Bless America but God Help ‘Em.

How is it they’ve been stuck with so many dog wankers – and this incumbent half-chat Indonesian passing himself off as a Kenyan Afro-American and waving a forged Hawaiian birth certificate around as his sole qualification to run for public office – and still no fucker in power cries “FOUL!” and does something about it – apart from one Arizona sheriff who the media totally ignore.

Alas, the entire US Great Satan’s graft and corruption-ridden bureaucratic system is on the Zionist payroll – or getting blackmailed / threatened with a body bag if they don’t follow orders – and after the Israelis and the Bush administration kikester Neo-Cons pulling the see-through false flag terrorist attack on 9/11 to forward their Protocols of the Greedy Bastard Elders of Zion agenda - and being allowed to get away with it - then all hope has gone for another generation at least. Unless of course some twat wakes up, pulls a Paul Revere and shouts “Enough!” and lops the head off the Zionist-dominated military-industrial bankster / crypto-Jew-infested corporate monster.

While their only true patriot President was Andrew ‘Old Hickory’ Jackson, Lincoln tried to oust the Federal banking cabal and was assassinated for his efforts. Eisenhower’s on the public record warning of the ‘sinister shadow government’ menace, and JFK tried to do the right thing - when he was able to keep his cock in his pants and one eye on the ball.
But what a shower of shit they’ve been cursed with since – and on a toss up between Barky Obama, or Barry Soetero, or whatever his fucking name is – and Mitt the Moron, then it looks like they’re gonna be stuck with more of the same - and still have their foreign policy agenda set in Jerusalem by the psychos and homicidal maniacs in the nutty Knesset.

Que sera sera, pigs might fly and this Arab spring may well evolve into a stark Islamist winter as Karma’s hand turns the dial of Destiny.
Mitt’s obviously sold his soul for thirty pieces of silver – or in his case, the Zionist vote – with nary a mention of the human rights and wrongs abuses visited on the marginalised Palestinian population of what was once ‘Palestine – and is now the illegal, rogue state of Israel.

But any criticism of the Chosen People and their rogue ZioNazi state is strictly verboten – and a definite career suicide move for Western politicians.

Thought for the day. Would you waste your vote on a tosspot like Romney – or Obama for that matter? What’s it like to be an American and live in the good ole Davy Crockett / John Wayne ‘land of the free, home of the brave’ nowadays – and feel like you’re continually getting shafted up the back passage by a corruption ridden government that are continually wiping their asses on the Constitution and Bill of Rights – and kowtowing to the Rothshite crime syndicate’s Ashkenazi Jews of convenience in Jerusalem and Tel Aviv?

Send your comments using the online reply form below and you could win a freshly-bulldozed 400 square meter lot in the occupied West Bank’s Rachel Corrie Memorial Gardens housing estate.

Regardless, fuck Israel and their New World Order – and support the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions campaign.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.