US Target Iran with Propaganda Bomb

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Resorting to the customary Zionist tactic of intimidatory alarmism, Israel's deputy prime minister – yet another of the psychotic Khazar-Ashkenazi Jews of convenience that promote the usurping and racist cult of Zionism to the detriment of rationality and humanism - has claimed the Iranian Republican Guard’s ‘Mad Scientist’ division are developing a missile with a million kilometre range, capable of hitting the Moon - or if the wind’s blowing in the right direction – then even Mars or the Sun.

According to the red top gutter press Hudaibiya Gazette, DPM ‘Mushy Matzo’ Ya'alon added for maximised scaremongering effect that the missiles are obviously meant to target the pariah ZioNazi state of Israel and the Great Satan’s base of operations in Washington DC - although a rocket that could be fired such a distance could also strike Baron Rothshite’s country estate at Kikeborough in England or his Greek holiday villa on Corfu.

Addressing the annual Hudibaya National Security conference in Tel Aviv, Ya'alon further claimed that thanks to the shifty Shylocks running AIPAC for arranging a recent US Senate appearance by the crypto-Jewish Director of National Intelligence James Crapper to present a chilling new assessment concerning Tehran’s belligerence and blow the insane Mullahs nuclear menace fantasy out of all proportion, the alarmist corporate media coverage of the threat to global peace posed by Iran and the rest of the world’s suicide-bent Jihadist Muslims has now progressed at a geometric rate of knots – with the likes of Alaska’s Eskimo communities shitting kittens that they too might be high on the Tehran’s hit list and a target for their insidious weapons of mass distraction.

Crapper’s submission to the Senate’s ‘Headless Chicken’ Committee painted Iran as the ultimate bogeyman with an Iraqesque dodgy dossier capability of commanding a 45 minute window in which they could launch a barrage of their inter-continental Scaremonger missiles – all armed with the Soviet style ‘Bullshit Bomb’ type nuclear paranoia warheads which have a post-detonation half-life of several weeks - and might well cause mass public panic and hysteria on the proverbial ‘ballistic diarrhoea’ scale if the media winds were favourable.

Crapper further played on the perfidious fable that Iran was eager to assert itself on the global stage - even within the continental United States – drawing attention to the alleged plot hatched by Tehran to assassinate Sheikh Fizzy al-Kaseltzer, the Saudi ambassador to Washington by having one of his Ethiopian catamites slip a depleted uranium suppository up his jacksy while performing a rim job - a harem-scarum plot that has raised serious questions concerning the implausible Wiley T. Coyote style scenario which rumours claim involved hiring El Beaners - a Mexican drug gang - to carry out the hit if all else failed.

General Achmed Dhabiha, commander of Iran’s Republican Guard Shaheed al Ka-Boom Suicide Bomber Regiment, spoke to Press TV concerning Crapper’s fabricated report to the US Senate.
“It is a stream of gross hypocrisy from what constitute the two most evil sovereign political forces in the known Universe that have the Klingons beat hands down – the ZioNazi bastions of the United States of the Great Satan and the Rothshite crime syndicate’s capital of Israel. They are out to change the governments of oil-rich Islamic nations whose views do not coincide with those of the West.”

“Now the Great Satan threatens that if the Israeli scum carry out a pre-emptive attack on our country – on our nuclear research facilities - and we resort to a self-defence strategy and attack Israel in reprisal, then the Kenyan cuckoo in the Zionist-controlled White House, this Barky O’Barmy kikester puppet, will be compelled to order an all-out attack on our people. And the United Nations will sanction this hypocrisy?”

“Any attack, by the Zionist land thieves in Tel Aviv or by the Great Satan, is fraught with unforeseen consequences and will trigger a jihad across the length and breadth of global Pan-Islam that shall unleash forces ready to die in their efforts to finally wreak destruction on the aggressors of the Muslim peoples.”

Thought for the day: Alas and thrice woe - for purposes of belligerence we command a technology of far greater evolution than our moral and intellectual abilities to rationally commit such to destructive use.

The tactics of the Israel First lobby plumb the depths of dishonour and indecency and include character assassination, selective misquotation, a wilful distortion of the record, the fabrication of falsehoods, and an utter disregard for the truth.

Oh, and by the way, fuck the ZioNazi Rothshite crime syndicate and their New World Order.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known ZioNazi Ubermensch propaganda infested area and may contain traces of Islamophobia and a variety of venal ‘isms’ - including kikesterism, fascism and rampant racism.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.