Tutu Nixes Two-Step with Teflon Tony

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Archbishop Desmond Tutu has pulled out of the Rothshite crime syndicate-funded Discovery Invest Leadership summit in Jo’burg after refusing to participate in any public function that provided a platform for such a corruption-ridden scumbag as ‘Phony Tony’ Bliar to spout his hypocrisy and lies - alongside fellow class act ‘consumer-brainwash’ hustler Terry Leahy, the former boss of world’s most reviled Greedy Grocer supermarket chain, Pestco – and so denigrate the exalted presence of the trio of guest speakers, the Russian chess grandmaster triplets team and political opposition thorns in President Vlad Putrid’s arse: Garry, Harry and Larry Kasparov.

Tutu, who was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1984 for his leadership efforts as a unifying figure in the campaign to resolve the venal problem of apartheid in South Africa, informed one gutter press hack from the Warmongers Gazette that he preferred to avoid the company of homicidal psychopaths, and it would be inappropriate for him to attend the event in Johannesburg due Teflon Tony’s morally indefensible participation in conjuring dodgy dossiers to justify the illegal invasion of Iraq and turning the civilian population’s well-regulated society and infrastructure into a Balkanised bomb-happy ‘order-into-chaos’ nightmare of sectarian violence and generalised mayhem that is an even worse threat to life and limb today than in the post-invasion months of 2003.

“This treacherous pariah Tony Bliar and his partner in crime George Dubya Bush - he with the IQ of a small potted plant - should be taken to the International Criminal Court in The Hague for their part in executing the illegal invasion of the sovereign state of Iraq by making up some cock and bullshit stories concerning weapons of mass distraction.”
“Now they are pulling the same immoral stunt over Iran – things that only exist in their evil minds as an excuse to justify another act of aggression and invade some hapless Muslim country to steal their natural resources under this black propaganda litany of lies that they claim is a war on Islamic terrorism and these Jolly Jihad Muslims that hate Western democratic freedoms.”

“But yes, it is a war on terrorism – and they, Britain and the Great Satan and Israel are the terrorists – and look now upon the spectres of Afghanistan and Libya and their proxy civil war in Syria, and the ethnic cleansing and genocide campaigns that take root in their wake – and next Iran and a total war that will shake this very earth we stand upon when things start going ‘Ka-Boom’ from Tehran to London to Washington – and specifically in Tel Aviv.”

“Their Coalition of the Psychos military campaign against Iraq in 2003 has left the world more unstable than any other conflict in the history of the known Universe – and opened a window of opportunity for the ZioNazi state of Israel to boast its regional military hegemony and go sabre-rattling against all its peace-loving Muslim neighbours - as they imprudently choose to ignore the condemnations of international jurists and human rights and wrongs groups against their barbaric racist 'apartheid' treatment of the victim Palestinian populations of the occupied West Bank and besieged Gaza Strip.”

The Archbishop’s withdrawal and castigation of Bliar and Dubya Bush as a pair of ‘dog wankers’ (a mutant sub-set genus in the fuckwit / tosspot classification index of Linnaean taxonomy) and ‘playground bullies’ came as the influential South African Muslim party Al Jama-ah threatened to expedite the arrest of the internationally-despised former British Prime Minister for ‘crimes against humanity’ concerning his involvement in the 2003 illegal invasion of Iraq and joint responsibility with the craven Dubya Bush for contaminating the entire country with depleted uranium.

Al Jama-ah spokesman N’dinga Wormhole Jaffacake, told media hacks "Their invasion and ensuing war was illegal for it breached the UN Charter provisions which state all members of the United Nations must refrain from the use of force against the territorial integrity or political independence of any state – and the terms of Resolution 1441 did not sanction any such thing."
“But this vain-glorious Bliar is a frog who still dreams of being a toad and we want nothing scumbags like him have to offer. He is the type of person who inspires people to count their fingers after shaking hands with him – and we know he is lying every time his lips move.”

“Bliar holds the post of the Middle East Peace Envoy for the United Nations, the EUSSR, the Great Satan and Russia – but whose portfolio is one of sanitising the rogue state of Israel’s human rights and wrongs abuses and never makes a single mention of the plight of the Palestinians or the occupied West Bank or the Gaza Strip’s population, surrounded and imprisoned by Israel’s Great Apartheid Wall in the biggest concentration camp on the Earth.”

“Where was he, this so-called ‘peace envoy’ when the IDF’s psycho thugs launched their festive season Operation Kill Every Fucker military campaign against the civilian population of Gaza in the Christmas week of 2008? Did he come running with an UN-mandated truce document or some olive branch? No, he was across the water, not too far, holidaying in Cyprus, and ignored the plight of the 1,300 Palestinians – women and children - murdered by these scumbag Ashkenazi Jews of convenience.”

“He is Baron Rottenchild’s Zionist bankster poodle, a placeman to sanitise and justify the crimes of the Great Satan and Israel in the Middle East and open doors for them in the West – a venal quisling ready to sell his soul for thirty pieces of silver – and a person we know as a smarmy kunt that cannot tell the truth even if he hasn’t got a lie ready.”

In response to Archbishop Tutu’s diatribe Bliar’s in-house spin doctor issued a strongly worded press release in defence of his 2003 decision to order MI6 to spice up Achmed ‘Curveball’ Chalabi’s fairytale ‘45 minutes to Armageddon’ WMD dossier and go along with the US Neo-Con’s illegal invasion of Iraq.

Composed in the ‘first person’ the statement reads: "I would like to point out that despite the problems with sectarian killings and bombs going off every five minutes, plus all the insta-mutations due depleted uranium, Iraq today has an economy three times or more in size than it did - and child mortality rate cut by a third of what it was in 2003 when we invaded and the ten years of economic sanctions came to an end.”

Hmmm, regardless of how much BS and convenient post facto rationalisation Bliar spouts viz the illegal and aggressive war, for this homicidal cretin to point to an improvement in child mortality rates merely demonstrates his historical myopia, ignoring the impact of the UK / Great Satan imposed sanctions which denied Iraqi children access to vital medical treatment.

Thought for the day. Yeah right, nice one Tony – as long as all those kiddies – the ‘collateral damage’ victims – didn’t suffer and die in vain. All for the greater good, eh.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.