Tuesday, 11 September 2012

Scameron Reminisces ‘Good Old Days’

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The Libservative Coalition Prime Minister, Posh Dave Scameron, spoke to press hacks outside 10 Downing Street yesterday, ahead of the London 2012 victory parade.
Accompanied by Mayor Bonkers Boris Nonsense and a legion of media limelight-hungry Paralympic volunteers, along with gimps with limps athletes trying their damndest to get a look in and flash their medals, Dave pontificated that it had been a truly golden summer for Broken Britain, first staging an Army division strength martial law style security operation that would scare off a Dalek invasion – and make Orwell turn in his grave – to safeguard and protect QE2’s Diamond Jubilee from terrorist attacks, followed by Wimbledon, and capped with the honour of being the host for the 2012 Olympics.

Obviously the intoxicating euphoria of the moment seized Posh Dave’s immature public schoolboy mind, prompting an outpouring of verbal diarrhoea and gibberish to praise the Games – along with the ‘brilliant’ rain-swept summer that saw a weather-shy public camped indoors and glued to their TV screens – then unfortunately concluded with the moronic statement that "2012 will be like 1966, full of great memories continuing to delight us, and our children, and our grand-children, for all the hard times ahead” – without quite defining what made 1966 such a significant and memorable occasion for anyone in Britain – apart from the fact it was the year Mr & Mrs Scameron’s ‘little bundle of joy’ Dave (sic) came into the world.

The prime minister opined that the combined summer events had brought the country together – (apart from the silly Scots and that Alex Salmond character spoiling it all by whingeing about independence and ‘their’ share of North Sea oil) – and galvanised displays of magnanimity from all sectors of society, with even His Royal Rudeness, Prince Stavros of Edinburgh, receiving ‘get well’ cards from commoners after being hospitalised yet again with his chronic venereal disease complaint.

However, Scameron did concede perhaps some of that ‘kindred spirit’ bonhomie, not seen since the Blitz, might well fade as the sheeple no longer had any 24/7 Busby Berkeley televised jubilee and sports spectaculars to distraction their attentions from the omnipresent fucked-up state of the UK’s economy and industry – apparently the main topic of discussion amongst the subversive ranks of the unemployed loitering outside Jobcentres 5 days a week and awaiting some divine miracle to materialise – such as the revitalisation of British industry – or the Second Coming and Rapture – or the overdue arrival of Godot.

When asked by press hacks on the enigmatic essence of the reference to ‘1966’ in Scameron’s speech, his ‘significant other’ – Deputy PM Mick Clogg - gave the customary “Dunno” reply and an apathetic shake of the head at the cryptic meaning – with the entire coalition membership overlooking a faux pas of Biblical proportions that provided a propaganda opportunity New Labour’s spin doctors and socio-political strategists considered simply too good to miss and exploit.

Mere hours after Scameron’s disastrous ‘slip of the tongue’, New Labour’s juvenile wunderking leader, Ed Millipede, appeared on the steps of their party HQ at Brewers Green to issue a press statement for the public record: “It’s bad enough for Posh Dave to be thought an utter tosspot without opening his gob and confirming the fact – but that’s now a point of business for the Tory voters to contend with".
"However we are grateful for him praising past Labour governments by comparing this summer of 2012 with a reference to ‘the halcyon days of 1966’ – when Harold Wilson, the Labour MP for Scouseland’s Huyton constituency, was our Prime Minister and we held sway in Parliament.”

Ah, the halcyon days of 1966, when the ‘Old’ Labour Party’s Harold ‘Red Mole’ Wilson was PM, with his Moscow Soviet handler / secretary, Marcia Forkbender, the de facto boss at 10, Downing Street – and the raving Anglophobe, General Chazzer de Gaulle, the President of France – looking down his huge snout at us and shouting across the Channel that Britain would never be a part of the Common Market (EUSSR-to-be) while he was in charge of Frogland.

Yes, those days of yore – long before the notorious shirt-lifting Tory paedo Ted Heath pawned our soul to Brussels, before the vindictive, menopausal Twatcher and her Tory government de-industrialised the progenitor of the Industrial Revolution, and Tory treachery signed away whatever was left of national, sovereign identity at Maastricht – replacing Britain’s prefix of ‘Great’ with ‘Broken’.

So if we look at the sadly diminished state of our once-sceptred isle today, 1966 was not quite, but close to, a perfect world.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

1 comment:

Fletch said...

....the overdue arrival of Godot .....nice one.