Monday 25 July 2011

Cable Fails ‘Engage Brain’ Test - Again

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Vince Cobble, the Lib-Dum MP for Twatenham and incumbent Libservative Coalition Business Secretary, already marked with notoriety for his habitual ‘political incorrectness’, yesterday once again failed to engage brain before opening mouth when he exercised his democratic right to talk and act like a bloody moron while chatting with gutter press hacks.
Vince decided to totally overlook the problems with the UK’s stalled economy and instead hold court to pontificate on the fucked up snafu that constitutes the United States’ current insolvent condition – a Debtocracy of some 14 ‘trillion’ dollars – what banksters refer to as ‘one hell of a lot of fucking money’.

Speaking later on the BBC's Andrew ‘Bat-Ears’ Marr Show, ‘Vicious Vince’, a man with an opinion on anything he knows sweet fuck all about, continued his skewed diatribe by attacking US Republican politicians for holding up a deal to reduce US government debt – referring to them as a bunch of right-wing nutters in the American Congress.

Cobble gained his questionable experience of economics while acting as the Treasury Finance Officer to the Kenyan Government of President Winnebago Chuckabutty in the late 1960’s – where he oversaw the ruling kleptocracy’s system of barter and standardized exchange rates at one coconut for four bananas – and two chickens swapped for half a bag of maize – plus a wife with most of her teeth and virginity intact, and blessed with a nice pair of tits and those African fellattio-friendly lips - being worth three cows.

Cobble explained that unless a deal on Capitol Hill is agreed before August 2nd the US Treasury will run out of money to pay the bills for maintaining their war fronts in Afghanistan, Iraq and Libya – thus forcing the Pentagon to cancel the scheduled invasions of Syria and Iran – and perhaps totally pissing off the Israeli Knesset and IDF by making them pay for their next load of US arms to murder Freedom Flotilla activists and Palestinian children with.

President Barky O’Barmy is out to force Congress’s hand to cut US debts by reducing domestic and social government spending on frivolities like welfare benefit and Medicare, then raising personal income taxes for Joe Q Public - whereas Republicans in Congress are strongly opposed to the tax rises and have told him to stuff it.

Secretary Cobble, in his questionable financial wisdom, claims the long-overdue collapse of the US monetary system presents a bigger chain reaction risk to the global markets than the continuing debt woes in the terminally-flawed Eurozone – especially so if a fickle and opportunistic People’s Marxist Utopia of China decide to dump their trillion bucks holdings of American dollars as payback for the US kikesters working to force their long term commercial interests out of Africa – and specifically Libya.

Alas either scenario heralds the end for the equally-doomed Euro and fatally-linked Eurozone - and too the EUSSR’s kleptocratic administration - that now manifests as an ingrained system of institutionalised graft and corruption which runs so deep the Brussels-based government – alike the US military-industrial / bankster commercially-dominated Capitol Hill - is incapable of functioning without it.

But what else can we expect when clots like Vince Cobble don’t even comprehend the fact we’re addicted to ‘pay later’ plastic credit card convenience and further bound to a flawed system of Debtocracy, founded on the capitalist principles of fractional reserve banking that allows the shifty Shylocks to grow fat on the exorbitant profits derived from blood-sucking usury - coupled with the manipulation of commodity trading values and derivatives investments - and bargain basement sub-prime loan swaps.

What is required is a global rising of the proletariat to rally around the four interlinked causes of Peace, Debt Repudiation, Social Credit and putting a timely end to the sinister agenda of the Protocols of the Greedy Bastard Elders of Zion – and thus liberate mankind.
Yet instead we have the moronic likes of Cobble saddling us with ever deeper debt via the route of printing more money – aka the process of ‘quantitative easing’ - a revised Malthusian Catastrophe concept of how to keep milking the cow without feeding it.

Thought for the day: The age-old financial expression of ‘next to nowt’ has been devalued to the extent that such will now cost a minimum of £20.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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