Tuesday, 7 December 2010

Pope Backs WickedLeaks Founder

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

WickedLeaks head honcho Julian Blancmange has been granted bail and released on his own surety of £5 quid after surrendering to the UK’s Metropolitan Plod Squad this morning and later appearing at Bow Street Magistrates Court in London to answer an extradition warrant issued by Swedish authorities on ridiculous US-instigated charges that he engaged in consensual three hole sex without a condom – a fate worse than death in silly Sweden – the supposed model of social modernity.

Presiding Judge Sir Irwin Bogbrush told the court “In all conscience I cannot sanction Mr Blancmange’s extradition to Sweden at this time of year as the weather in Stockholm is even colder that Britain’s – and with bollocks-deep snow. This would be an affront to his God-given human right to stay warm and cosy and not be sharing a frigid prison cell with a bunch of reindeer-bonking Laplander sodomites. We shall thus schedule a review of the extradition warrant again sometime in June 2011 – if this global warming phenomenon is permitting.”

Rumours remain unsubstantiated that Pope Benny, the Mk XVI German ‘build to last’ model, has thrown the entire weight of the Vatican’s resources – both legal and financial – behind Julian Blancmange’s defence against charges he is being persecuted – and prosecuted – for having sex without a condom – as any good Roman Catholic should.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Oh, and by the way, fuck Big Brother – and his sister – and the New World Order.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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