Monday 4 March 2013

Sacked Psycho-Plod Sues Force

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

A Cardiff Employment Tribunal has ruled that a traffic police officer was unfairly dismissed from his job for writing a whistle-blowing whinge letter to the force’s hierarchy complaining he had been unfairly dealt with for acting in an unprofessional manner that would have caused fear and alarm to a platoon of Nazi storm troopers – let alone a geriatric driver with health issues.

The Plod Squad officer, PC Taffy 'Moshpit' McTwatt, a former G4S Renta-Thug Security Agency guard, claimed he was made a laughing stock of and forced out of his job due a politically incorrect bullying campaign initiated by colleagues in the South Wales Scroteshire Police who teased him and wrote insensitive graffiti comments on his locker at the station following a road rage incident in which he lost it – spit the proverbial dummy – and attacked a Range Rover driver’s side window with his Jolly Jackrabbit baton – with the video of the attack going viral and appearing on SpewTube, the online video sharing website – where it garnered 30 million hits.

The incident, recorded in Imax 3D on the police car’s dashboard video camera, was triggered when Mr Ron Madeupname, 74, was pulled over by officers for a minor traffic offence – not wearing his seat belt - but drove away, believing they’d finished dealing with him after he gave them £20 quid each for coffee and donuts.

He was subsequently pursued for 17 minutes along country lanes and when the car was finally brought to a halt the video shows PC McTwatt running up to the driver’s door with his dildo-like truncheon drawn and striking the window non-stop until it smashed – while his gormless companion PC Frank ‘Basher’ O’Moron, jumped on the £60,000 Range Rover’s bonnet and proceeded to boot in the windscreen – at the end of which the hapless Madeupname was dragged from the driver’s seat and manhandled out of camera range.

Appearing at Scrotborough Magistrates Court following the surreal incident, Mr Madeupname, who claimed he thought the officers were giving him a police escort home in grateful response for their £20 nicker bribes, was found guilty of not wearing a seat belt, failing to stop, using a vehicle with a personalised registration plate, having non-standard tinted windows, bribing police officers - and driving in a pair of slippers.

Conversely Madeupname was eventually provided with an official apology for the officer’s barbaric conduct and awarded £20,750 compensation for the damage to his 4 x 4 and £45,000 in legal costs.

Speaking to a press hack from the Psychopaths Gazette, Mr Madeupname opined “You’d have thought I’d robbed a fucking bank – or was some kiddie fiddling Tory cabinet minister on the run the way those two delinquent goons attacked me – and did anyone test them for booze of drugs? Of course not cos they’re all members of the same secret handshake club.”
“It’s something you might expect in Los Angeles where the police are recruited from the terminal psychosis wards of mental institutes but not in the quiet of the Welsh countryside.”

So once again we see Charles Dickens’ Mr Bumble proved correct in his iconic observation that ‘The law is an ass’ – or in this case rather that the uniformed tossers tasked with administering the law at street level are a bunch of donkeys – and the thug responsible awarded a six-figure unfair dismissal payout by the not fit for purpose Employment Tribunal.

Here we have a clinically insane psycho in a blue uniform, with McTwatt’s administrative misdemeanour equating as ‘we can get away with anything’ – being on a par with the Met’s TSG barbarian Simon Harwood, caught on video at a G20 protest demo’ in the act of dealing out the fatal blows that were the direct cause of innocent passer-by news vendor Ian Tomlinson’s death – for which he dodged a guilty verdict of manslaughter and instead walked away with no more than a slap on the wrist.

Thought for the day: Was the old fart in the Range Rover at fault? Yes. Were the gung ho brain damaged plods at fault? Yes.
Hence here we have a total clusterfuck reaction in which Psycho-Plods 1 and 2 went overboard – much to the entertainment of 30 million YouTube viewers.
Thank fuck he wasn’t carrying a chair leg – or a stack of Big Issues – or looking a bit like a Brazilian electrician – otherwise it would have been a body bag incident. Hmmm, little wonder the UK’s police force prefix of PC has come to mean Prize Cunt.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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