Solicitor-General ‘Above the Law’

The British Transport Police’s pathetic mandarins have decided - against all sense of ‘What is Right’ – that it’s in their future best interests not to take any actions to prosecute a split-arsed gobshite government minister (read Solicitor-General) who got into a very vocal barney with train passengers after her dog crapped on a railway platform and she refused to clean it up.

This incident now proves beyond all doubt – and yet again - that there’s a law for landless peasant fucks and another for ranking government scumbags who think the sun shines out of their arse – and they can shit on who - or what - they like, and too –when and where – and get clean away with guaranteed impunity.

The shrewish ginger minger MP for Red Bull was filmed on CCTV permitting her dozy dawg to foul the platform at Kings Cross station in October, then launching a caustic finger-jabbing diatribe against a young mother with her child when confronted by her to clean up the pile of steaming canine crap – as per the legal statutes of the country which said battle-axe of a Solicitor-General is supposed not only to enforce but observe and obey herself.

BTP enforcers and a Police Community Support Officer (PCSO) from the Renta-Thug Bullies-for-Hire Agency were summoned after train passengers challenged the 67-years old post-menopausal Solicitor General Vera Baird at London's King's Cross and a row ensued over allowing her incontinent barking machine to crap on the platform, then refusing to remove the fectal mess.

It is a legal offence if an owner does not clean up immediately after their dog has fouled land to which the public has access – specifically parks and ‘railway station platforms’.
A furious row developed which left the youing mother and child in tears and prompted a police investigation into the minister’s disgraceful behaviour - with the incident originally being logged in the police blotter as a ‘crime’.

The fine is usually a £50 fixed penalty notice, but according to official whistleblowing sources Baird took great personal affront at being challenged by the woman and the PCSO, and gave them both a ‘complete mouthful’.
However history shows that it’s always a problem when other people don’t share the same high opinion of, and regard for, the exalted High Panjandrum you promote yourself as being. The Ego surpassing Intellect syndrome has been the downfall of many.

According to the PCSO, when he turned up to deal with the altercation, a by-now furious Solicitor-General Baird made it clear she was ‘above the laws of common peasants’ and shouted at the officer “Don’t you know who I am?”.

Apparently Volatile Vera’s haughty “Don’t you know who I am?” statement met with the PCSO’s reply of “Yeah, you’re the arrogant bitch who’s just let her dog shit all over the station platform and is refusing to clean it up."

When Baird told the PCSO to ‘clean it up himself’ he took note of her personal details and submitted a report suggesting the minister be investigated for the further public order offence of causing ‘harassment, alarm or distress’ – which carries a maximum fine of £1,000.

British Transport Police, who are usually more than ready to intimidate and bully some disabled old age pensioner or vulnerable homeless type who is travelling without a ticket, begging or busking, today informed the Antinomian Gazette that following an investigation a decision was taken by their Freemason bosses not to proceed further as they didn’t want to be in the Attorney-General office’s bad books and cop it in the neck for something down the road.

Mrs. Baird told Fux News "I have received an apology from the BTP to say they were sorry for drawing my attention to the fact my puppy had shit all over their precious station platform and as far as I am concerned the matter is closed. Now eff’ off before I set the dogs on you."

The acid-tongued harridan is no stranger to controversy. Three years ago, as a junior minister, Baird was forced to withdraw highly critical remarks aimed at a judge who she thought had given a lenient sentence to a paedo’ who kidnapped and sexually assaulted a three-year-old girl.
Obviously the back pedal approach doesn’t work when she’s guilty of a public order offence and can use her crooked government connections to squash criminal charges as this case in question demonstrates.

A product of the old ‘Slags-to-Riches’ phenomenon, Baird was born in Oldham’s Slumford Hamlets and went to the local Asbo Central High, where she graduated in ‘Gobbing Off’ and won a Slapper s diploma for ‘Unqualified Arrogance’ at Slagsborough Polytechnic and was awarded the graduating class’s ‘Miss Gorgonella’ rosette.

In May 2009 the Daily Shitraker revealed that Baird had inappropriately attempted to file a claim for £286 of Christmas decorations using her MP expense allowance. Baird has described the dodgy goods as "miscellaneous items", but House of Conmans officials noticed the nature of the items on the receipt and refused to pay.

The light-fingered Baird also cheated on her Additional Costs Allowance ('second homes' allowance) by designating a London flat as her main home while claiming allowances for a four-bedroom property in her constituency as her second home.

Previously known around Whitehall and the House of Conmans respectively as ‘Old Shit for Brains’ and ‘Red Slag’ due her vitriolic temperament, six foot height, ginger minger hair and Bolshie holier-than-every-fucker attitude, the Teesside Labour MP for Red Bull has now been bestowed with the well-deserved and fitting sobriquet of ‘Dogshit Vera’.