Sunday 11 October 2009

Bliar gets Pariah Treatment at Memorial Gig

A father’s grief boiled over yesterday into a furious rage when he came face to face with the man blamed for his son’s death.

Ex-UK Slime Minister Tony Bliar offered the handshake of condolence during a reception at a London Chew and Spew fast food outlet following a memorial service at St Sappho’s Cathedral to commemorate the thousands of British army troops maimed, mutilated and snuffed in the illegal Iraq war.

‘Don’t yer dare put yer scabby rabid paws near me yer two-faced lyin’ twat,’ roared Mr Hector McScrunt. ‘Yer’ve got me son’s blood all over yer effin’ ‘ands.”

Three of the former Prime Minister’s bodyguards from RentaThug sprang into action, beating McScrunt with pick axe handles for upsetting Bliar’s sensibilities and telling the truth – then swiftly ushering away a visibly shocked Mr Blair - who had earlier been severely castigated during the service by the Archbishop of Canterbury when he referred to “the scally git who dragged us into this illegal foreign war is a right prick and now sat amongst you – the dirty lying pariah rat.”

However the 96-year-old Mr McScrunt - whose son Ghengis died in the battle to find Iraq’s non-existent weapons of mass distraction - was not finished and informed the Warmonger’s Gazette “As far as I’m concerned that cunt Bliar’s a war criminal – along with the other scally shitbag in the US - Dubya Bush – they should both be hung fer their sins.”

During the St Sappho’s service Dr Rowan Bean criticised both the delinquent Bliar and Bush leaderships for concocting a travesty of lies on which to launch the illegitimate invasion of Iraq and convert it from the bread basket of the Fertile Crescent into the basket case of the Middle East – the veritable disfunctional landfill site it has now become solely to steal their oil, provide mega-buck profits for Scalliburton and the major oil companies and establish permanent military bases to threaten and intimidate Israel’s chosen enemies.

Dr/. Bean further admonished the military-industrial cabals that profited greatly from supplying weapons to the Coalition of the Guilty and claimed he prayed nightly that there really is a God who will cast them all to Hell eventually.

Overheard in conversation with the Queen and her bumbling Greek partner – the geriatric virus-wannabee Phillip – Dr. Bean commented “I simply cannot believe that twat Bliar been even allowed to come to this reception – never mind having the hard-faced insolence to show up here.”

“I read in the news that Bliar’s made £14 million on the back of taking us to war in Afghanistan and Iraq and now he’s being touted as the president of the EU.”
“Ostracise the bastard scumbag I say - he’s about as polular as chemotherapy – or a leper at a christening - to coin the old adage.”

The Archbishop of Canterbury – a die-hard Tory - used his address to the Queen, the Prince of Wales, leading politicians and 2,000 servicemen and their families to remind them that the Iraq invasion was illegal and the people responsible should face war crimes charges.

Dr. Bean caused quite an incidence of embarrased seat shuffling by guilty Labour government scumbags when he dared to rake up the truth and mention “The public is now well aware that Saddam’s weapons of mass destruction were a pretext for the illegal invasion and the real reason was the fact Iraq had switched from accepting US dollars for oil payments to Euros.”

Yesterday’s memorial service took place to honour the thousands of British soldiers and military personnel who were snuffed by irate Iraqi housewives between the start of the conflict - known as ‘Operation Kill Every Fucker’ - in March 2003 and the withdrawal of British troops in April this year.

Apparently the memorial service organisers claim that Blair and his slack-gobbed slapper of a wife Cherie were purposely not invited and had gate-crashed yesterday’s Guildhall fast food reception after the religious service to grab a free meal and try to chat the Queen up for a life peerage for Tony.

However Bliar was caught offside by Prince Phillip who told him "You've got as much chance of a ticket into the House of Lords as my lad Charlie has of ever being King - so piss off and fuck a pig and don't bother Lizzie or I'll have my security blokes set the Royal corgi pack on you.”

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