UK Election Debate on Sky Comedy Channel

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Posh Dave Scameron and Fast Eddie Millipede, to the mirthful amusement of fellow Parliamentarians, have taken to behaving alike a pair of spoiled brat schoolkids, chucking accusations at one another of who's a 'cowardy-cowardy custard' as they clashed across the floor of the House of Conmans yet again on Thursday during Slime Minister's Questions – with each of the tosspots playing one-upmanship scaredy-cat games regarding the substance and scope of a proposed television broadcast platform to field election manifesto debates.

Millipede claims the Tories refusal to take part in a goggle box debate unless the Green Party is involved is a pathetic excuse to avoid being exposed as credibility deficient – whereas Scameron shot back that he would debate with 'any fucker or their dog invited by the BBC broadcasters – including the ISIS Takfiri Caliph Abu Bakir al-Binbaggi' – and the Labour leader was chickening out of facing the Greens - for in any televised pre-election canvassing debate all national parties must be represented - precisely the opposite of the drivel he stated was cardinal rule policy back in the dark Opposition Party days of 2007.

Obviously if such a policy is ordained and the Greens to be included, then so too must the feared UKIP bogeyman and Plaid Cymru, plus the independence-bent Scottish Nonce Party - along with the Pancake Tuesday Adventists, the Rabid Raving Loonies and not forgetting the Flying Spaghetti Monster Centrists - nor the Trussell Trust 'Manna from Heaven' Foodbank Party who have made seven league boot popularity strides with malnourished members of the common herd who've been reduced to starvation rations under the incumbent Con-Dem coalition's welfare benefit slashing regime – thanks to the likes of the train fare dodging / coke snorting Chancellor George 'Spankies' Osborne and the Nasty Party's sadistic DWP Minister, Iain Dunkin Shit.

Ed Millipede – a failed artificial intelligence project experiment and viewed by many as a total fuckwit, is now at the helm of a political party that has evolved from Old Labour into New Labour, then again as simply Labour due Tony Bliar morphing them into the War Criminals Party – and have now this week re-branded themselves again – as the Wallace & Gromit Party in a desperate bid to rid themselves of the Bliar / Broon era foul taste of lies / illegal invasions / war crimes / Operation Ore coverups – plus the 2008 boom and bust fubars.

Conversely, corporate sock puppet Posh Dave Scameron has so far dodged any rebranding issue, with the Tory hierarchy refusing to rename themselves the 'Hooray Henry Rothshite Bankster Party'.

Thus both Millipede and Scameron are using a Parliamentary platform to shout one another down and call each other total idiots – a point on which, for once in their political careers, they are both correct.

The 'running scared' factor besides, any pre-election goggle box political debate will, in all truth, only serve to publicly expose the lot of them as a bunch of credibility-deficient, incompetent dog wankers with fuck all idea of what's actually going on at street level in our once (pre-fracked) green and pleasant land.

The heated exchanges between Scameron and Millipede arose after the latter, joined by Lib Dum leader Mick Clogg and UKIP's indestructible Nigel Barrage urged the BBC, Sky News, ITV and Channel 4 broadcasters to press ahead with televised debates before the great game-changer 7th May poll - even if Scameron and his Tory tossers miss their chance by refusing to take part.

Not ones to miss out on a golden 'gift horse' opportunity, the Green Party's tree-hugging leader Twatalie Bennett opined to one press hack from the Daily Shitraker that she backed Scameron's stance – and in a sudden 'blonde moment' lapse of logic and good judgement claimed that regardless of it being against the vote-splitting political interests of the Tories, Labour and Lib Dums, they should persuade broadcasters to include her party on the principle of a level playing field argument alone.

Bennett claims the Greens now have a 43,000 party membership, compared to UKIP's 42,000. Conversely the Tory Nasty Party boast a membership of 149,000, Millipede's Wallace & Gromit Party with 189,000; the Scottish Nonce Party membership boosted to 93,000 following the No referendum last year – and the Librarian Dummercrats with a membership of around 44, thanks to Mick Clogg's pathetic leadership - putting them just ahead of the Total Losers Party.

Likewise we have the SNP's short-arsed First Minister Nicola 'Zira' Sturgeon following Bennett's lead and demanding she too get her chance of an hour of infamy behind the podium on a televised political debate. (WTF is it with the Scots – Salmond and now Sturgeon – haven't they got any politicians that aren't named after fish?)

Thus, we have 'Wallace' Millipede claiming that Scameron is shitting kittens viz a televised political debate as he's run out of anything credible to say and the Tory Nasty Party have exhausted their end of this fatally flawed and not fit for purpose coalition fubar – and no longer have the answers to anything.

To the common herd's discerning eye they're behaving like a bunch of rowdy schoolkids with their pathetic name-calling and having a set-to in the playground – rolling around in the shit like a pair of cretins - hair-pulling, biting and scratching each others eyes out.
What a bunch of shameless tosspots with their political 'brownie points' posturing, as it all manifests as a piss poor stand up comedy act and no more – even the jokes are blasé and no longer funny.

Hmmm, politicians, to a man – the grist from Hamlet's mill – and to paraphrase Dr Johnson, 'What could be done with a politician, if caught so young'?

Ron McScrote, quadriplegic leader of the radical Anarchy Now group, had this to say to one press hack from the Nihilists Gazette: "Whoever promises the long overdue an' denied full one-off 'In or Out! Out! Out!' referendum on Broken Britain's continued EUSSR membership gets my effin' vote. An' none of that bullshit like wot they did in Eire – kept havin' referendums til the bent government scumsters got the right vote."
"Then the UK's current jobless wilderness will morph inter a veritable oasis of work placements for Tom, Dick an' Harry as soon as the eastern European economic migrants are hoofed out and the Polski Shopski's shut down an' the Albanian swan roasters fucked off – along wiv all the gyppos an' pikey child sex slave traffickers."

"I'll tell yer wot else we wants ter see - an end ter this political correctness / criminalising free speech fiasco – an' Terry May's Orwellian Snooper's Charter that's doubtless gonna be further superseded by some Big Brother totalitarian state compliance-driven 'Do As You're Fucking Told' bill."

"An' on the subject of our so-called multicultural Big Society, the polarisation of our population dates back ter the Race Relations Act – yet another piece of ill-thought out legislation that needs scrappin' – along wiv these so-called prejudice based incidents wiv school children gettin' slapped wiv racist tags cos they sez some fuckin' thing wot's now considered politically incorrect – like callin' this global warmin' fiction a pile of crap, when it's fuckin' obvious it's gettin' colder."

"Talkin' about scrappin shit, then we got these secret family courts of protection wot's there ter facilitate legalised kiddie snatchin' by Common Purpose NLP-conditioned (brainwashed) 'for profit' social service pondscum wot's gettin' fuck-off whoppin' big commission-based backhanders for stealin' sprogs for fosterin' an' adoption an' passin' them on ter paedophile gangs."

"An' talkin' about fucked up government policies, stop blamin' the fuckin' Muslims for MI5's false flag terrorist attacks. Really, I gotta ask this – wot the fuck are these people on – the I-Spy game or black propaganda business - of entrapment and stitchin' up hapless morons and wannabe 007s as disposable terrorist patsies?

"Tell yer wot else we want - MP's salaries cut back ter pay wot they're worth – a figure nominated at constituency level – PBR (paid by results). Then we have the nepotism issue – hirin' family members (number one offender Nick Clegg take note) as Parliamentary staff - such as Mum an' Dad an' Auntie Vera (cos she makes a great cuppa) – an' the family cat ter catch House of Conmans mice."

"Next we need a ban on political donations – these bribes an' facilitation fees - by both private an' corporate interests – cos the day that occurred then a backdoor ter graft and corruption woz opened. (Don't mention the Hinduja Sisters) An' the same wiv post-government service positions for the Masonic fraternity brethren – these lucrative more at scent than substance directorships wot morph inter crafty old boy lobbyin' jobs."

"Then we come ter the bloated bureaucracies – both Shitehall civil service an' local authorities – an unsustainable economic burden, all these jobsworth paper shufflers. Next on my agenda we want ter see a cancellation of all PFI contract agreements an' put the entire caboodle back under public 'not for profit' ownership – startin' wiv Rattle Track an' Notwork Rail – then the dustbin men."

"The shifty shylock-controlled Bank of England, this privately-owned Rothshite crime syndicate edifice, has got ter go an' the Treasury start printin' our own debt-free currency – then fuck the IMF off an' renege an' default on any debt owed – by reasons of usurious interest already paid ten times over."

"A biggy on my wish list after launchin' a full inquiry inter the murders of Princess Di', Jill Dando an' David Kelly – an' havin' Tony Bliar an' Co up on war crimes charges before a Nuremberg Tribunal Mk 2 - is a total nationwide ban on frackin' an' genetically modified Frankenfood crops. Then kick the Met Plod Squad's arses and have them start ignorin' D-notices an' Get Outa Jail Free cards an' collaring these untouchable VIP Freemason politicos an' landed gentry paedophile scumsters wot have bin fingered an' named by child sex ring victims – an' there they can start wiv Savile's big pal, Prince Dobby an' his sex slave shaggin' brother, Prince Andy Pandy."

"Last but not least outlaw all fuckin' Masons from runnin' for public an' political office, bitch slap the Israel ZioNazis for their human rights abuse treatment of the Palestinians an' impose a full government-backed BDS policy against them until they hand back wot they've annexed an' stole since 1948."

"So, whoever goes ter the people canvassing wiv a party election manifesto wiv these points might just get a ballot box win an' the mandate ter govern the country an' reverse Britain's current prefix of Broken back ter the one-time, pre-Thatcher deindustrialisation era of 'Great'"

Would you like to appear on the national television stage in a political debate with the likes of the Con-Dem / Libservative coalition partners Scameron and Clegg going at it hammer n tongs with Wallace & Gromit - and watch as the entire Tory / Lib-Dum casus foederis concept gets thrown to the capricious vagaries of the four winds as the long knives are drawn and they proceed to literally hack each other to pieces?

So if you have some stupid political comment you'd like to make before a national audience send us your comments using the online reply form below and we'll dump it in the recycle bin with all the other crap trash.

Thought for the day. How about we hold a referendum on the TV debate issue - fair to all concerned? In fact, why bother with a debate when all these clowns do is attempt to make out who is the bigger twat with the greater record of incompetence-related fuck ups and scandalous personal behaviour to their political discredit.

Hmmm, in Empire's Day, a mere couple of generations or so back, all these loser twats – Scameron, Clogg, Wallace Millipede et al - would have been shoved off to the Wogga-Wogga Land colonies as 'remittance men' – unfit for fuck all else than shagging gollies and drinking themselves into oblivion and an early grave. Dead wood ne'er do-well social lepers and ostracised pariahs, banned from returning to Mother England.

Bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and get people using their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' and make that 'harm's way' quantum leap to start thinking for 'themselves' and become agents of their own destiny.
No longer accepting and believing what the gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format - or the totalitarian EUSSR Federation control freak state is the solution to all our problems (wrong - it is the fucking problem) and the 28 nation European community contributes to our dysfunctional multi-cultural society.

Thus fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity, and Big Brother – and his Common Purpose sister – and the profit-motivated / money-grubbing Moloch / Mammon worshipping Agenda 21 architects of the Rothshite ZioNazi New World Order Globalisers - the Round Table dog wankers, and their Council on Foreign relations and Trilateral Commission pondscum pals who comprise the elitist ranks of the annual Didloberger cabal get-together.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.