Saudi Blogger Cops Mega Flog-a-Thon

In this morning’s ‘Islamic Philistines’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The gospel according to banner headline reports in this weekend's Gulf region Barbarian's Gazette, a Saudi Arabian student has been publicly flogged after being convicted of the foul crime of cyber blogging and insulting the teachings of Islam as being the pathway to Jahannum (Hell).

Raif Badassi, known to friends and family alike by his internet blogger handle of 'Lucky', was sentenced to 500 lashes plus 5 years in jail and reluctantly received the first 50 strokes of this brutal punishment after prayers on Friday. The flogging will be carried out each week in the forecourt of Jeddah's Ministry for Cruelty until the full sentence is completed – or Badassi dies of shock – in which case the 'flogging a dead horse' syndrome will automatically apply.

Badassi, the co-founder of a now banned Jaysh al-Hisbah" (Army of Morality) website – which gained notoriety in the West as the 'Saudi Sucks Network' - was first arrested in 2012 by the KSA's ridiculous Monty Pythonesque 'Mutaween' religious police - the Kafkaesque ‘Vice & Virtue Squad’ - on charges of apostasy for claiming King Abdullah and the 20,000-plus so-called 'Royal Family' are guilty of the crime of Fesad fel Arz (the spread of corruption upon the Earth) and branding them a cabal of Iblis (Satan) worshipping sodomite-pederasts - with human rights groups condemning his conviction - and the holier than thou US of A jumping on the bandwagon by appealing for clemency.

To wit, last Thursday a US state department spokeswoman, Jen Psaki, went into 'meddler' mode and urged the Saudi authorities to 'think twice about expediting this brutal punishment' and review his case – an ill-thought protest which resulted in the sentence being increased to 1,000 lashes and 10 years in prison.
In addition to this doubling of the original penalty, the unemployed Badassi was ordered to pay a fine of 1 million riyals (£175,000 quid).

In 2013 Badassi, a self-declared 'Shaheed' martyr - was cleared of apostasy for claiming to be the Dajjal (Islamic Anti-Christ) – a crime that went out of vogue in Europe some centuries ago but still carries the death sentence in backward Third World dumps like the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia suffering under a harsh, dogmatic regime of Sharia Law. However the hapless Badassi was found guilty of a range of offences in the anti domestic terrorism court – which included telling the truth that the KSA was ruled over by a bunch of hedonistic hypocrites and a venal kleptocracy of fat twat oligarchs.

Perhaps copycatting the outlaw ZioNazi state of Israel's abhorrent disregard for the most basic human rights principles and the statutes of international law, Badassi's lawyer, Mr Ghaban Neekni Sahrawi, was sentenced to 15 years in prison for defying Imam Manuke Khara ibn Himar, head honcho of the sadistic Mutaween religious police and daring to defend his client on charges of broadcasting online political dissent by criticising the ruling al Saud clan's corruption before a global scale social media audience.

But that's the KSA, not so much a matter of welcome to the Third World, it's more a case of welcome to the fucking Dark Ages. Talk about 'Backward' – with a large Capital B for Backward, it's still 1436 in the shithole desert kingdom. For fuck's sake, in 1436 (six centuries ago) Henry VI was on the throne, in the midst of the Hundred Years War with our historical enemies, the fouls and foreign French – and to our undying shame, the Scots kicking the English arses at the Battle of Piperdean – a one-off, not to be repeated.

The Saudi Minister for Injustice, Sheikh Fizzy al Kaseltzer Bala’a il A’air ibn Zamel – (a zillionaire tribal chieftain who claims hereditary grazing rights for his extensive goat herds on every hotel lobby carpet in the Persian Gulf region) – spoke via phone to one gutter press hack from the Sadists Review in an attempt to condone the harsh treatment meted out on Badassi, claiming "This man is very fortunate he has not been sentenced to beheading for his blasphemy and apostasy. Here in the KSA we have very strict laws where women get stoned for adultery; thieves have a hand chopped off for shoplifting – and you can imagine what gets chopped off if you are caught pissing in a royal oasis."

"Worse still he has been denigrating our good regional friend, the Israeli Prime Minister Bobo Nuttyahoo by supporting the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions (BDS) campaign and attempting to provoke the Palestinians - specifically Hamas’ Gaza Gangsters and the occupied West Bank-based Al Fatah Saracen Scallies - into kick starting a third Intifada by posting on his blog that the fragmented state of Palestine is a country robbed of peace and bereft of aspirations since the Ashkenazi Zionist Jews of convenience stole their nation from under them via a terrorist campaign back in 1948 with the Yawm an-Nakbah – the Day of the Catastrophe - the Palestinian's 'Shoah' – their 'Holocaust'."

Disclaimer: While scores of innocent non-combatant women and children might have become collateral damage casualties, no politicians or foreign service diplomatic personnel were harmed in posting this insurrectionist epistle.

Thought for the day. Bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and get people using their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' and make that 'harm's way' quantum leap to start thinking for 'themselves' and become agents of their own destiny.
No longer accepting and believing what the gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format to maintain the status quo of our dysfunctional multi-cultural society.

Thus fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity, and Big Brother – and his Common Purpose sister – and the profit-motivated / money-grubbing Moloch / Mammon worshipping Agenda 21 architects of the Rothshite ZioNazi New World Order Globalists - the Round Table dog wankers, and their Council on Foreign relations and Trilateral Commission pondscum pals who comprise the elitist ranks of the annual Didloberger cabal get-together.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.