Tuesday, 23 December 2014

Rich n Shameless Snobsters Strike Again

This morning’s ‘Enhanced Ego / Amok on Steroids’ edition brings readers the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

In yet another stellar seasonal display of blatant abuse of privilege and an exaggerated sense of entitlement going overboard, celebrity drug addict and jet set trollop Tara Palmer-Tomkinson VIP was arrested by armed plods at Broken Britain's premier Thiefrow Airport last weekend after suffering another of her seasonal bouts of ego-rage and morphing into a Tasmanian Tantrum Devil after being refused access to the Terminal 5 first-class travellers' lounge due holding a cheapskate discount economy class Sleazy Jet ticket to 'Klotsters' in Switzerland - to join her snow-snorting Hooray Henry skiing pals.

'Toxic Tara', known to friends and associates alike as a self-promoting slut who pompously parades herself as an English socialite, an 'It girl', television presenter, model, media columnist, and charity patron - had the brazen hubris to initialise her full family name with the chemical / high explosive sounding diminutive acronymic of TPT - just to upset Daddy.

Hmmm, at least the TPT is an improvement on the disparaging sobriquet of 'BMX Tara' which she was labelled with at Dorset's Sherborne School for Skangers due being the academy's 'bike' - and everyone sporting a cock having had a ride on her - with this reputation for promiscuity following her into adult life viz allegations she's spread more doses of the clap and associated diseases of Venus around than current Guinness world record holder 'Poxy Paris' Hilton.

The Skeletor-faced Tara, when in her cups from quaffing jeroboams of vintage Chateau de Pisshead or spaced out on a Class A narcotic substance 'high', likes to boast her main claim to fame is the waxworks effigy of herself displayed at London's Madame Tussaud's - in the drug freak horror section - hence another reason she manifests in the public eye as a spoiled brat twat 'sociopath nightmare' - short of a good kick in the arse to cure her unqualified arrogance.

Going into total amok mode outside Thiefrow's first class lounge, the 42-year old psycho bitch swore at officers then tore out her hair extensions and week-old Tampax - which she proceeded to throw at PC Jobsworth with a "Cop for this, yer pig scum bastard" - threatening to kill every fucker old enough to scream and bleed - hence copped for a well justified double tap Taser shot in the back and was duly cuffed and arrested by an alerted team of eight armed Plod Squad thugs.

Tara P-T, scion of the Home Counties Palmer-Tomkinson clan, has a history of anti-social behaviour that would make Atilla the Hun blush - all attributed to her drink and drug problems - and had been due to fly out to the exclusive Klotsters ski resort to celebrate her 43rd birthday before throwing this latest industrial strength hissy fit 'on steroids' simply by virtue of the fact she was loathe to lower her social status by sitting with the common herd riff-raff in the economy departure lounge.

The shock n awe arrest was captured on both airport CCTV and fellow passengers' smart phones and cameras - with onlookers describing her pulling a "Don't you know who we are?" stunt - arrogantly applying the royal 'majestic plural' - to which the BA manager replied " Yes - you're a low life drunken skanger" - which prompted Toxic Tara to rip off his lapel security badge and start her fatal paranoid screaming episode - threatening Thiefrow's airport security and first class lounge staff with an unspecified "proportionate response - at a time and place of 'our' own choosing".

Here the double standard laws for the rich and shameless - and laws for the common herd - come into conflicting play as anyone else pulling that type of ego-stunt 'one-man riot' in an airport since the 9/11 and 7/7 false flag Muslim jihadist attacks would be slapped in irons on domestic terrorism charges - but as PTP is a big mate of the parasitic royal family this latest public arena outrage resulted in her being carted off out of the public eye to a west London police station where she was subsequently slapped with a caution under Section 5 of the Public Order Act 1986 and driven back to Thiefrow to catch a later flight.

Oh yes, Ms Tara Palmer-Tomkinson, apart from once working for the Rothshite Kosher Nostra bankster syndicate, also has some heavy duty regal connections, by virtue of being the god-daughter of Prince Dobby, the Royal Plant Whisperer, and who attended the wedding of Bald Willy to Katie Middleclass, and freely admits she is the ultimate high octane-boosted party girl, and earned a certain backstreet notoriety for her £400 quid-a-day cocaine habit - along with a string of failed heterosexual relationships which have served to spur her Sapphic side as she hates the way testosterone-fuelled males perform oral sex.

The 'after effects' of cocaine addiction forced her to undergo reconstructive surgery on her beak when the septum nasi 'collapsed' back in 2006 from over-snorting Columbian Gold – damage control that had to be repeated five years later - yet a handicap that didn't prevent her from winning the Comic Relief Red Nose Day in 2007 - albeit for Tara it was actually the 'No Nose' prize.

In recent years and since repeated rehab sessions at The Priory her public profile has been partially revitalised until she made an appearance on the British television series I'm a Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! - which included getting grunged up in the Jungle Shower and shit on from a dizzy height by diarrhoea-stricken koala bears - a stunt she finished as a crap-stricken runner up.

Palmer-Tomkinson's highly questionable presenting credits include Animals Do the Funniest Things when she appeared with career paedophile Jimmy Savile and got shagged - quite literally - doggy style by Blue Peter's Viagra-fuelled Randy the Rottweiller - and later appeared on Top Gear as their 'slut in a reasonably-priced car' - then replaced the intellectually-stunted Victoria 'Dumb Spice' Beckham as the face of Walkers Crisps.

But to cap her non-entity moronic celebrity status she was a joint guest with ex-New Labour PM Tony Bliar on the BBC's 'Would I Lie to You?' comedy quiz, in which the bonkers bitch candidly revealed that she had been shopping in her local Greedy Grocer Pukesburys supermarket wearing nothing but a trenchcoat - and with a pair of Ben Wah balls stuffed up her cavernous snatch.

Thoughts for the day. TPT is yet another shit for brains member of the publicly-despised Hooray Henry class that look down with scorn and unqualified arrogance on the useless eating common herd demographic - and to also adopt the majestic plural - in our collective opinion, this contemptuous dog wanker belongs in a freak show - to be spit on and poked at with sticks.

Definition of a 'socialite' - some slut who allows Tapas Nine VIP paedo rings to sexually molest their children in the hope of gaining grace n favour career advancement from Westminster's Nonce Central - or the equally corrupt BBC.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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