Fracksters Nix Cheshire Site Desecration

This morning’s ‘Corporate Greed Personified’ edition brings you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering gossip from Ron McScrote, currently self-shackled to the upper branches of a Giant Sequoia Redwood on Dutton's Lane, Chester - but still manning the 'Environmental Pillagers Watch' hotline for Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with 'ring of the anvil' dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding non-conformists, proto-nihilists and career radical revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The dust continues to settle in the wake of the outrageous fascist eviction of anti-fracking protesters from their Upton Community Protection Camp near Chester last Tuesday – a fiasco that involved an excess of 175 Plod Squad thugs from four police forces (including Welsh Wales) tasked to support High Court Enforcement Officers (bailiff wankers from the Renta-Goon Agency) - an operation that has to date cost an estimated £200,000 quid of taxpayers' money – with nine civilian innocents arrested for exercising their Magna Carta pledged right of democratic protest and displaying the audacity to oppose a Nasty Party approved agenda to allow corporate lobbyist sponsors and political donors to go ahead unhindered with their 'for profit' environmental pillaging project.

Now, to add insult to injury, the ScumGas Corporation who were hell bent on fracking the shit out of rural Cheshire turned round on Friday – three days post-eviction - and stated for the public record that they have decided not to drill for coal bed methane at the disputed site, nor a second at neighbouring Mickle Trafford, as neither currently meets the corporate bean counter's 'profit versus loss' criteria for successful money-spinning commercial coal bed methane exploitation.

ScumGas Corporation spokeswoman, 'Soundbite Sally' McSlagg, informed one press hack from the 'Drill or Drop 'Em Gazette' that her company would not be commenting on the eviction nor the possession / eviction order sought in the High Court last year.

Further, McSlagg revealed that despite the litany of petulant foot-stamping 'we can't get our own way' tantrums and turning rural Cheshire into a veritable fucking war zone with the invasion of rabid Neanderthal bailiffs protected by 170-odd Plod Squad thugs – the sworn uniformed protectors of the public demographic – (what bullshit - the protectors of the moneyed-corporate / political ruling class, more like. A bought and paid for tool of corporate oppression) - her fracking industry tosspot bosses have done a 180 degree u-turn and stated that as 3D seismic surveys reveal there's no oil or gas worth a fuck down there, ScumGas are no longer interested in abusing Chester's sub-strata geology and polluting our greenbelt county's pristine landscape in pursuit of high carbon polluting fossil fuels.

ScumGas, alike the equally despised Caudrilla Resources, are both founding members of the Fuck the Earth EVA (Environmental Pillagers Association SA) group that have been contaminating the sub strata water tables and geology of our once sceptred isle with a cocktail of toxic shite radioactive chemicals – and additionally causing all manner of minor (to date) earthquakes and crockery-shaking tremors in the reckless pursuit of profit, with zero respect for Nature not the Gaia Earth Mother principle.

Ms Chlamydia Ffitch-Gargoyle, Labour MP for Chester's Pikey's Crotch constituency, speaking to gutter press hacks outside the House of Conmans yesterday, called on ScumGas to get their hand in their corporate pocket and fork out £200,000 nicker to offset the exorbitant costs of funding the eviction process of an anti-fracking camp at its now-abandoned Upton drill site.

While Ffitch-Gargoyle informed media sources that personally she was chuffed to little mint balls the fracking project had been shit-canned, in her MP capacity she criticised ScumGas management for going ahead with the High Court eviction petition when they already knew from seismic data interpretations that there was fuck all methane gas worth fracking for and the site would never be worked.

“If John Dwyer, the not fit for purpose Plod Squad Crime Commissioner for Cheshire and Chief Constable Simon Burnt had any bottle, they should be grabbing ScumGas by the short and curlies over contributing to the costs of the eviction when they knew full well the fracking site would not be used."
"Now ScumGas need to explain the logic of why they were trying to make a futile political point by pushing for that eviction to go ahead when they knew they would never frack the site. Or rather is the political point simply one of 'We have the money and power – we'll always win'?"

"I've got serious doubts about who the fuck is controlling Broken Britain's government and has their lobbyist's hands up the arse of that ginger-mingin sock puppet twat, Amber Crudd MP – Miss Conflict of Interest personified - who 'Pelindaba Dave' Scameron, in his infinite stupidity, elevated to the cabinet rank of Energy Minister following the 2015 election."

"The same argument goes for the High Court - and too the Plod Squads – on both national and regional levels – when we have private companies like ScumGas and Cuadrilla pulling Parliament's strings like some bought and paid for stooge manikin. The common herd – the Upton protest camp taxpayers – pay for the law courts and the police – and then they get shit on by the former and arrested by the latter. So even to the uneducated eye, something stinks."

Thought for the day. These greedy environmental spoilers won't be happy until Mother Earth resembles a desiccated lump of coke and the flora and fauna – and humanity – go the way of the honey bees and the Dodo – total fucking extinction.

Carbon Credits Cap & Trade Offset Exchange (aka Global Warming / Climate Change Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: While a hefty score of conscience-stifled energy corporation wankers, politico ponces, bent money-laundering lawyers and corruption-ridden porky plods might have become collateral 'fear and alarm' casualties and thrown into paranoid psychosis states of scandalous exposure anxiety attacks - no innocent non-combatant women and kids - and especially so Syrian refugee children – or trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees, small furry 'felcher friendly' sized mammals - otters / voles / white mice, bum rats, hamsters / guinea pigs / gerbils etc – were harmed in posting this insurrectionist Truthsayer epistle.

Conversely, a large number of the NSA - GCHQ / Five Eyes Alliance’s Prism / Tempora / Carnivore / Echelon / X-Keyscore / SIG-INT I-Spy super snooper ‘Nosy Bastard’ wire-tap / IMSI catchers / eavesdropping / Eco-Giraffe data mining / TOR sniffing / JTRIG / Umbra Ultra-encrypted system’s nasty network electrons on Hubble Bubble Road in EMF smog-bound Cheltenham were shocked into high anxiety states and temporarily inconvenienced.

So bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and awaken people's vigilance against the corrupt establishment's totalitarian encroachment - using their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' – and no longer accept nor believe the propaganda and lies our corrupt gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in a disingenuous politically correct format – then make that 'consequences be damned' / 'harm's way' / 'who gives a flying fuck' quantum leap to start thinking for 'themselves' and become agents of their own destiny.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Raving Rupert Mudrock's News Corp and the uber-racist Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence - (unless one has the audacity to dare expose, name and shame the membership ranks of Scotland's Masonic Speculative Society 'Nonce Ponce' Magic Circle / Violate BD/SM Club kiddie fiddling cabal – along with their Holyrood Parliament / Crown Office sodomite / paedo-enablers and cover-up protectors).