Austerity Hypocrisy Dooms Tory Re-Election

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The state of dark, rebellious passions which now rule the ranks of Broken Britain’s common herd society – the very ‘sheeple’ that this Con-Dem Nasty Party Coalition assume with unqualified arrogance to lord it over – are those of acrimonious dissent and do not bode well for Tory or Lib-Dum candidates alike at the ballot box come the day of reckoning in 2015.

The entire pissed-off voting demographic of our once sceptred isle is ready and raring for this next general election in May 2015 – counting down the passing days alike the hapless Estragon and Vladimir waiting for Godot - (who unbeknown to his pals copped for a fatal ration of NHS Trust Liverpool Care Pathway treatment after being hospitalised with an ingrowing foreskin some days previously and most definitely won’t be arriving as scheduled).

With fanfare and vengeful relish, on the 7th May 2015 we can express our collective ire at the voting booth and hoof this absurd Tory-dominated coalition vaudeville dog n pony show out of office – and hopefully not put an X down for the also-ran election pledge-breaking Lib-Dum ‘Loser’s Party’ - or the child wunderkind-led New Labour incompetents whose mismanagement of domestic and international affairs caused this flatline economic calamity in the first place.
At a pinch the indestructible Nutty Nigel Barrage and UKIP sounds a fair alternative choice, or the equally bonkers tree hugging crowd, or the BNP – or the EDL – or even Screaming Lord Sutch’s Raving Loony Party – or do we return to a system of autonomous tribal collectives, dump the Crapitalist monetary ripoff and go back to barter trading?

While no fucker or their dog actually won the 2010 general election, and Cabbage Patch Dave’s Nasty Party garnered a few more votes than the Gordon Cyclops Broon and the New Labour dog wankers – things were still pretty free and easy until the Tory’s Minister for Social Misery, Iain Duncan Shit – assisted in no minor way by the train fare dodging Chancellor George ‘Spankies’ Osborne and Her Royal Pompousness, Employment Minister Esther ‘Blonde Moments’ McVey - set out on a pre-plotted course of strategic social engineering strikes to devastate the dignity of the unemployed and disabled with their respective ‘lettres de cachet’ – so they were branded as common herd pauper scum, then subsequently disenfranchised and cast out, stigmatised by the ruling hierarchy as the wretched of the earth.

Let’s be clear on one fact here – the ‘disenfranchised’ were not just a slew of ne’er-do-well workshy scroungers and disabled impersonators with their little walking sticks and limp wrist slings – the social benefit addicts that hang around outside boozers all afternoon rolling ciggies and mainline on jobseekers allowance, sick pay and housing benefit – but the actual poor and needy ostracised in situations of acute want and distress, abandoned by this duplicitous nanny state, to survive by their wits and own devices. Not an easy task for those frail of limb and short on mental acumen.

In utter disgust we perceive these merciless, empathy-deficient pondscum twats such as the above-named trio and their 640-odd House of Conmans cohorts – along with the Shitehall civil service jobsworth bureaucrats – who simply erode the integrity and trust required for democracy to function. To wit, their actions are tantamount to treason.

And the main blame for this state of affairs lies squarely with Iain Duncan Shit, the DWP’s welfare benefits-slashing answer to Freddie Kruger. Blighted as he might be with a legion of palpable faults, he’s thus deservedly earned the thousand and one pejoratives that serve to describe his sub-human condition to a tee – and branded as a smug cunt about sums him up - end of story.

With Duncan Shit, if he was a black feller, then we could perhaps put this failure to comprehend the misery he’s causing down to some congenital mental aberration, such as the Bell Curve Deficiency Syndrome – same problem as afflicts Barky ‘Drone Wars’ Obama - the Kenyan-Indonesian ‘Harry Lennix’ clone – that ‘darkie’ Muslim cuckoo currently squatting in the White House under false pretences and trying his damndest to beat Dubya Bush’s and Tony Bliar’s war crimes body count records.

But alas, 20/20 hindsight does not provide a facility to revise or correct the flaws of past government actions, hence worthless onanist twats like Mr Duncan Shit simply fall into Parliament’s perpetual recycling of duff politicians process, with the tosser hoofed out of the party leadership post due his reliance on the evasive art of temporising – a habit evolved following a lifetime of making the wrong decisions.

Thus ousted as Fuhrer of the Nasty Party, alike his equally useless Tory contemporaries - closet case Willy ‘Fudge’ Vague and the bloodsucking Michael ‘Drac’ Howard - the not fit for purpose hypocrisy-ridden Iain Duncan Shit, while basking in the perverted schadenfreude joys he derives from turning Broken Britain’s welfare benefits system into a hit n run, scorched earth hopscotch game, has conveniently engaged selective memory mode to overlook the fact he personally took a year off work when his missus was ill.

Oh yes, and all fully paid up - with us, the hapless taxpayers, getting shafted for the cost of that holiday - and nary a single ATOS check on his ability to do even part-time work – whereas any other fucker and their dog tried to pull a stunt like that and their welfare benefits get the chop.

Then in charge of this millionaire’s cabinet of tosspots we have Mr Austerity himself, Posh Dave Scameron, a ‘man tits’ flabby self-delusional buffoon who believes that in the eyes of the common herd (us) the Tory Party now constitutes an actual reformist ‘belief system’ – with him as the cult’s Messiah.

But Bullingdon Dave, current mouthpiece for the Great and the Good, fails to comprehend the stark realities of cause and effect inflicted on the heads of innocents by his fatally flawed coalition’s mismanagement of domestic and international / foreign policy affairs – and the devastation wrought not only on the economy of our once-sceptred isle but that too of our iconic welfare state safety net – specifically designed to cater for the diversity of human needs – and the once-boasted pride and joy of society’s victims - the real needy and benefit scroungers likewise.

Successive governments have worked for decades on delivering this Womb to Tomb welfare state and hence embellished the entitlement culture to an inbred cradle to grave expectation that borders on addiction – then the Tory Nasty Party, in their frustrated incompetence and ineptitude over how to reduce the national debt (just default) start slashing family and single parent benefits and can’t comprehend why they are pilloried by unemployed, homeless, gut-hungry mobs every which way they turn now the iconic privileges have been blocked.
And let’s not mention the £££ zillions ‘wasted’ on foreign aid charity and funding neo-imperialist wars of aggression – all of which would be better spent here in Third World Broken Britain.

Regardless, with hindsight thrown to the vagaries of the four winds, the austerity juggernaut lumbers on, claiming fresh victims with each passing day - crushing the Remploy facilities, paring down pensioner’s winter fuel allowance payments by £50 quid (as ‘unregulated’ gas and electric tariffs soar); imposing draconian second bedroom taxes - and all the while the House of Conmans bludgers are giggling away, personally ignoring the flatline state of our de-industrialised nation’s finances and while refusing to accept a ‘benefits cap’ on their Parliamentary expenses, are regardless and without a hint of self-regulatory control, shamelessly pushing for an 11% pay raise.

Yet we, the common herd, the 99%, the great unwashed, the useless eaters, the wretched of the earth, - who just happen, by circumstance of our toil and sweat, to be the ones actually funding the lifestyles of this privileged class - who by self-proclaimed divine right to rule have been sneering down their lardy-da toff class noses at the peasantry and lording it over us for centuries – nay, millenniums - and hence we are fully inured to being shit on by inbred bloodline mongrels who’ve been swimming too long at the shallow end of the gene pool.

Homelessness and youth unemployment, along with the myriad ills of our diseased economy, collectively represent the mechanism – explosive charge, shrapnel and detonator - of a socio-political time bomb of sub-nuclear proportions just tick-ticking away in the background of Broken Britain’s neglected inner city urban sprawls – our slum ‘projects’ and ghettoes.

Hmmm, come the Day of the Rope …… rebellion …… enough said.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.