Titled Brexit Traitors in Britain's Midst

In today’s 'Scum of the Earth' counter-culture exposé edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from our gender neutral media correspondent, Mimi van der Slutt, manning the live news cellphone hotline from inside a stationary cupboard at the Brussels-based EUSSR office of Brexit negotiations head honcho Michel Barnyard - for Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with 'ring of the anvil' dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all critical thinking non-conformists, aspiring proto-nihilists and career radical pro-justice revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial - and harbour zero respect or empathy for the privilege-abusing authoritarian 0:01% oligarchy that believe they rule this world and all upon its mantle.

Typical of his treacherous cast, in documents leaked to Bent gay magazine, Lord 'Judas' Scandalson of the Felchers has been exposed offering covert help to the Brussels' kleptocrat hierarchy - to overturn Broken Britain's Brexit referendum vote and keep our once-sceptred isle as a vassal state of the Coudenhove-Kalergi / Monett (et al) devised 'Shuman Plan' totalitarian EUSSR Federation.

In a letter to the European Commission's chief Brexit negotiator Michel Barnyard, the 'Vermin in Ermine' Labour peer, a notorious bottom-feeding arch-quangocrat, recently pledged his loyalty and deep commitment to the survival of the European project – and protect his £35,000 quid per annum pension as former EUSSR Commissioner for Rough Trade Affairs.

On a par with his closet case cottaging pal Charles Lynton – (aka ex-New Labour PM and international war criminal Tony Bliar) – Scandalson, as always, displays his customary unqualified arrogant hissy fit hysteria and declares himself – with psychotic pride – as a treasonous Remainiac – stating for the public record: "If Labour had still been in office in 2016 then there wouldn't have been any suggestion of an EU referendum. Tony and I would have put paid to that stupid idea."
"Now, as always, the common herd are wrong – and, as usual, I am right. We don't need a second Brexit referendum – as the Leave vote might be even higher the next time around."

"These impotent Tory cabinet wallahs just need to get shut of the prevaricating 'Timid Terry' Maybot, cancel Brexit, and be done with it. I know my best mate Tony would have done so if New Labour were still running the country."

Well, the tosser finally did a volte-face and woke up to the fact that a Referendum Mk 2 might produce a 90%-plus Leave vote – after previously pushing and shoving for a second referendum ballot. But common sense and logical narratives don't work too well with these brass necked wankers – especially so the likes of Scandalson, who has fatally infected the Upper House of Frauds with his Remainiac virus.

If Felcher Pete's skewed rhetoric is to be taken into account and the 1st EUSSR – In / Out vote considered inconclusive / invalid, then why should any election or referendum result ever be valid again - not to mention such a bonkers logic scenario would turn into a 'Neverendum' if the Remainiacs won the next ballot - with Brexiteers rationally – and rightfully - demanding a 3rd vote.

In the letter – (snaffled from the confidential European Commission files, thanks to the deft fingers of our trusty deep cover mole, Mimi van der Slutt - hence bypassing the frustrations of Freedom of Information requests being rejected) - Lord Scandalson suggested that he and Barnyard hold private talks at a conference they both attended in Brussels last November – writing: "I would welcome the opportunity to put some time aside for us to get together over a romantic candle-lit dinner and brief you on the current pressures in British politics - and share some thoughts viz my personal covert assessment on how to make a total fuck up of the Brexit negotiations."

Barnyard's office purposely refused to arrange a meeting for the dates fronted by the rat fink intriguing Scandalson, but expressed their sincere thanks for his treasonous offer and suggested it may be possible for them to meet at some later date.

"May we propose that you contact us upon your next visit to Brussels' for a dirty weekend at the Rue de la Matelots' Hard Cock Cafe or Duquesnoy bar – or a La Demence party. Then, as in the past, if you have to extend your return travel schedule again – and attend a medical centre to have some small furry mammal extracted from your anal cavity - we might organise a meeting at that time."

To wit, while the canny Barnyard had held several meetings with mutinous British politicians in the past weeks, including a shit list of treacherous Tory Remainiacs, all Hell bent on sabotaging the Brexit process – menopausal maniac Anna Sourpuss and Dismal Dominic Grieve – along with Labour's Spear Chukka Umunna – it was obvious Barndoor wanted sweet fuck all to do with the self-serving conspiratorial Scandalson – a class act hypocrite and Brussels shill who, even though no longer wielding any form of government post power or influence – has, alike that egocentric immigrant Remoaner troll, Gina Miller, been a vocal, pain in the arse, critic of the Government's approach to Brexit – applying the pathetic argument that it had to be cancelled as voters were not told the truth about leaving the EUSSR.

Scandalson even went so far as to claim, during an interview on Radio 4's Quisling Hour programme, that nobody – not even his Brazilian bumboy partner Reinaldo – or the 'hoodie-hugging' Tory Slime Minister, Posh Dave Scameron - had been warned, prior to the referendum, that Britain would leave the single market.

Que? WTF? Leave the EU / single market / customs union / justice laws = leave the entire crooked shebang. Good riddance and good-fucking-byeeee.

Last April, 2017, Scandalson was branded a traitor by opponents after he advised the European Federation hierarchy to ignore the interests of Broken Britain in Brexit negotiations – informing one German gutter press hack that "Basically, one can only advise the EUSSR Commissioners and their Round Table of Europe Corporatocracy bosses of one thing: Fuck Broken Britain and take care of your own long term New World Order interests."

Still up to his Prince of Darkness manipulative tricks, the treasonous wanker then attempted to put the Black Spot mockers on negotiations even further by speculating that Brexit talks would break down due the fact the Nasty Party PM, Terry Mayhem, had entered them with the wrong basic attitude – being a hard core Remainiac herself.

Thought for the day.
Hmmm, Scandalson might well attempt to emphasise that his mega-bucks EUSSR Brussels pension pot considerations has zero influence on his negative Remainiac views regarding Brexit – but at the end of the day its all about his pension rights – and due the sad fact he's a total cunt.

History will not remember Scandalson kindly.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour 'and' decaffeinated public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness.
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