AGSG Renamed 'Androgynous Academy'

In today's 'Tyranny of the Minority' batshit bonkers exposé counter-culture edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from our frontline post-op' transgender media correspondent, Holly Hermaphrodité, manning the live news cellphone hotline from Detention Room A at the recently renamed 'Altrincham Grammar School for Chicks With Dicks' for Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with 'ring of the anvil' dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding non-conformists, proto-nihilists and career radical pro-justice revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial - and harbour zero respect or empathy for the privilege-abusing authoritarian 0:01% oligarchy that believe they rule this world and all upon its mantle.

If you read last week's news and thought the world had already gone totally nuts – (Israel's 'One State' Solution – move the Palestinians to Egypt's Sinai / the diplomacy-deficient US President Chump referring to less fortunate Third World nations as 'shitholes' / We can't win in Syria so let's go to war with Iran or Pakiland instead / London Mayor, Sad Dick Khan, now in charge of Broken Britain's foreign policy statements / Windsor Council's 'ethnic cleansing' campaign to rid borough of homeless persons prior to Prince Hairy Hewitt & Megan Mongoose wedding / black cab serial rapist Worboys assessed as 'too violent for open prison' – so release him back into society) - then look again, for now the all-pervasive snowflake Liberalist political correctness 'Newspeak' culture has gone one step beyond the limit on the 'one to ten' insanity scale.

Broken Britain's Altrincham Grammar School for Girls, in the north-eastern corner of rural Cheshire, (established by 'male of the species' Cliff Wright, in 1910) has officially prohibited its teacher staff from addressing the female students as 'girls' – who shall now be known by the gender neutral term of 'Them' or 'It' - with Flatbrokes, the UK's ubiquitous High Street bookies, giving odds-on that the 'education facility' will be re-named the 'Altrincham Grammar School for Students With No Dicks' - (a government approved 'Sans Penis Education Institute').

The school's Common Purpose brainwashed Principal, Stephanie 'Snowflake' Bonkers, has instructed staff to not use the word 'girls' when talking to their 1,350 'gender-confused' students as she doesn't want to risk being sued by 'XX chromosome' pupils who might be 'mis-gender offended' - and – Heaven forbid - caused psychological trauma.

In a missive to the student’s parents, the androgynous Principal Bonkers elucidated “We are working to break ingrained habits in the way we speak to, and about, our pupils - particularly referring to them collectively as girls – when this might well offend the transgender minority who believe they are – erm – boys – and born in the wrong body – and my decision was made to ensure that all students feel comfortable."

(Yeah, right. See how comfortable these 'girls' feel when, instead of comfy tucked-away genitalia in their navy knickers – or thongs - they've got a six inch–plus cock and a pair of impact-sensitive bollocks hanging between their legs).

Principal Bonkers. a reformed Marmite addict and co-founder of the Bowdon Halitosis Society, continued: "As of next term, the transgender sector of the student body will be transferring to the local Altrincham Grammar School for Boys – until the Ministry of Education get their proverbial shit together and establish a national chain of 'transgender only' comprehensive schools for pupils who can't make their minds up what sex they want to be."

"Conversely, sarcastic comments and posts on our website, Facebook and Twitter pages besides, there are no plans to drop the descriptive appellation 'Girls' from the school's two metre high AGSG sign."

Interviewed by Andrew 'Bat-Ears' Marr on the Biased Broadcasting Corporation's 'Newshite' programme, ex-AGSG sixth form student, and mother-of-three, 17 year old Fellattia McSkanger, opined that "It all sounds like a right pile of crap ter me. Yer can definitely see the effects of Julia Middleton's Common Purpose paranoid neurosis factory at work here – an' the after-effects of the NLP mind-bending 'future leader' (sic) courses."

" Thank fuck I quit school after doin' me GCSE A-Level exam in Advanced Benefit Fraud, before this crazy shit started an' that Botox-deficient bottle blonde dipshit of a Head Teacher, Steph' Bonkers, gets a bunch of the dizzy twat students pluggin' fer the ultimate in 'body modification' on the NHS – an' bangin' down testosterone hormones an ' anabolic steroids an' growin' a four inch clitoris."

So, where next is this epidemic of mental case Liberal paradoxes headed? A new Marvel Comics Justice League movie – with sexy Gail Gadot as 'Wonder Person'?
Females officially categorised as a life support system for a vagina?
All split-arsed members of the human species (previously known as 'females' – Linnaean taxonomy sub index 'girl / woman') henceforth to be referred to as ... 'what' precisely?
Gender Neutral persons?

Doubtless Darwin's turning in his grave, let alone Mother Nature.

Hmmm, so much for the school motto of 'Fortiter, Fideliter, Feliciter' (Bravely, Faithfully and Cheerfully). And too their e-mail addy: admin@aggs.bfet.uk
That needs to be changed double quick, before the Common Purpose social services 'Political Correctness Police' catch a scent of non-compliance.

Thought for the day. Thus, by extension, if this 0:01% loony left Liberalist fascism is to become de rigueur and the case of the once-exclusive Cavendish Road-located Altrincham Grammar School for Girls to lead by example, then obviously that equally-iconic segregated centre of learning, Marlborough Road's Altrincham Grammar School for Boys will also be subjected to the totalitarian tip-toe treatment and renamed as a 'Dicks Only Academy'.

Trans-gender hysteria besides for one moment – let's leave that alone and question – what the fuck comes next in the political correctness barmpot arena? White students identifying as black? Black identifying as white? Human mammals identifying as fish - and kick start a mermaid wannabe panic?

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour 'and' decaffeinated public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness.
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