National Trust Too Woke to be Trusted

The Royal Mint has dropped plans to issue a commemorative coin marking the 125^th anniversary of the National Trust, following a decisive sub-committee review that the charity can no longer be 'Trusted' – (nationally or otherwise) - and is henceforth viewed as a 'bureaucratically troubled' organisation, promoting a controversial 'political correctness' Woke agenda.

Official papers obtained by the Daily Shitraker reveal 'Them n us' disputes regarding volunteers being instructed by Woke indoctrinated bosses to wear gay pride badges – plus the title word 'Easter' being removed from the NT's annual Easter egg hunt - contributed to the cancellation of the commemorative coin – and the NT censoriously rebranded as the Woke Trust

The National Trust was accused by volunteers of infringing on their human rights after staff at Fuckwit Hall in Norfolk were told to wear gay pride badges to mark 50 years since the decriminalisation of men bonking other men in 1967.

Seventy-five volunteers at Norfolk's Fuckpig Hall kicked off big time viz the order requiring them to either wear the rainbow ID badges - or be classed as gay-bashing homophobes - and relegated to backroom jobs – by threatening to quit en masse on grounds of constructive dismissal and drag the Trust into a class action employment tribunal case – which resulted in the Trust backing down and reverse their decision viz the mandated wearing of Hey I'm Gay badges for staff employed in public face duties.

The charity was previously slapped with a stream of criticism back in 2017 after it banned the word Easter from its annual egg hunt – an occasion which had been called the 'Easter Egg Trail' for the previous decade but was absurdly rebranded the 'Great British Egg Hunt' to appeal to the non-Christian residents of our hallowed Christian nation.

Oh, non-Christians, eh. Nice, but it seems political correctness doesn't stretch to give a flying fuck viz the sensibilities of the minority vegan sector of our troubled Woke society towards 'eggs' – and nary a thought to having a 'Great British Potato Hunt' instead.

The findings from the minutes of the Royal Mint’s sub-committee meeting, chaired by Tory peer, Sir Dinsdale McScrotum, read: "The theme was not approved. This 125^th was not a good anniversary. Judged to be a somewhat troubled and Woke-infested political organisation if they can appease the membershits of the UK's infidel religion groups – yet have some problem with accommodating the vegan sector of our society."