Labour's Covert Manifesto for High Treason

In today’s ‘Labour Party High Treason Plot' counter-culture exposé edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering anti-Monarchist hot gossip from our Parliamentary 'nigga in de woodpile' mole, Spearchucker O'Dinga, manning the live news smart phone hotline from a broom cupboard in the House of Conmans Labour offices for Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with 'ring of the anvil' dispatches hand forged and crafted into razor-edged bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding non-conformists, proto-nihilists and career radical pro-justice revolutionaries who carry the immortal genetic Rh-Neg bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial

A putrid pair of split-arsed Labour MPs are facing a nationwide wave of irate fury after moronically failing to engage brains before opening gobs and revealing a covert Corbynite plot to overthrow the Saxe-Coburg-Gotha royal scrounger blood line – by publicly agreeing to address the annual conference of a treasonous campaign group dedicated to scrapping the Monarchy - and the mega-bucks Civil List welfare benefits scam.

The menopausal seditionists in question are non other than shadow business minister, Chinless 'Race Card' Onwurah – the shot-up counterfeit Geordie MP for Newcastle upon Tyne (Central) – easily recognisable by its windswept coiffure resembling a soot-infested chimney sweep's brush – and the House of Conmans newly-elected ginger-mingin backbencher, Emma Bent Toad – MP for gentrification-obsessed / fire-hazard Kensington.

Onwurah and Bent Toad – a traitorous pair of wrinkly broomstick merchants - both looking to be a couple of shots behind with their Botox treatments – and the latter appearing as though she's the dress sense of some alkie bag lady that's been dragged through a hedge backwards - yesterday made a public announcement they would be 'none other' than 'guest speakers' at the anti-Monarchist Republic convocation in Newcastle this coming Saturday.

As though walking in the septic footsteps of Tariq Ali and other ingrate economic refugees, there's always some whingeing immigrant types – in this case one Biafran-Geordie and one half-Spic - wanting to overthrow our once-sceptred isle's cultural traditions (specifically, the Queen) and democratic values that date back to Magna Carta – such as the Guyana banana republic immigrant skanger, Gina Singh Miller - and her self-promoting unqualified opposition to the 17:4 million majority Brexit vote.

The conference, organised under the theme Taking Back Control, is due to debate plans for replacing Britain's constitutional monarch (Queen Liz) with an elected head of state – the Trotskyite Corbyn, perhaps?

Conversely Nasty Party backbench MP, Andy Bridgen, opined to one gutter press hack from the Mutineer's Gazette that "This pair of treacherous bitches are entitled to such anarchist views, but their actions make it bloody obvious that a large proportion of the Labour Party - including that Commie deadleg Corbyn - want Britain to end up more 'broken' than it is already and become a Republic - with the Queen and her gang of scrounging kids and relatives usurped."

"Perhaps they want Corbyn installed in Lizzie's place - as president - and living in Fuckingham Palace. But that's been his 'red mole' political ambition since forever – turning the UK into some Third World failed Commie state – like the USSR that was."

"Ms Chinless Onwurah's already down on MI5's anti-Monarchist hit list for organising her alternative 'people's picnic' on the Mall last year as a slap in the face to Her Majesty on the occasion of the Queen's 90th birthday."

"Plus she's provoked further anger earlier this month by making nasty jibes about Prince Stavros of Edinburgh on social media following an announcement that the Queen's 99 year old hubby was retiring from public duties – mindlessly Twittering 'Congratulations to the lazy-arsed Greek royal consort on retiring in financial security at time of his choosing from his career non-job' – a comment she promptly deleted in the wake of the angry Monarchist online reaction that recommended she go swim in the sea with a big brick tied round her scrawny black neck."

"Then we have this other nasty newbie, Emma Bent Toad, who became the MP for Kensington at last month's snap election and invests great industry in dissing our Monarchy. In her role as a Fifth Column member of the Republic group she described the Royal Family as a blight on our society – to quote: 'our very own dysfunctional Kardashian clan' - all subsidised from the public purse."

Thought for the day. Hmmm, quite surprised Ms Chinless Onwurah and Emma Bent Toad – and the pugilist-featured Ozzie refugee - former Green Party leader, Natalie 'Blonde Moment' Bennett - haven't been joined by that other nasty political piece of work – their fellow anti-Corbynite Labour MP and Ceylonese serial whiner / Brexit Remainiac - Thangam Singh Debbonaire.

Bollocks to the lot of them. Let's go de whole hog – 1789 French terror / 1917 Russian revolution style – out with the Monarchy and kleptocrat government – and declare the UK an insular anarcho-syndicalist commune.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour 'and' decaffeinated public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness. An anti-authoritarian counter-culture alternative opinion blog and free radical alternative media source 'not owned' by Raving Rupert Mudrock's News Corp and the ultra-racist ZioNazi Edomite Mafia 'Kosher Nostra' crime syndicate - and committed to the relay of open source information – plus 'hopefully' immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence - (unless one has the audacity to dare mention the dirty dealings of the Met's PPU (Paedophile Protection Unit ) or expose, name and shame the membership ranks of Nottingham's Nasty Paedo Club or Scotland's Masonic Speculative Society 'Nonce Ponce' Magic Circle arse bandit / Violate BD/SM Club VIP (Very Important Pederast) kiddie fiddling Edinburgh / Balmoral / Glencoe / Aberdeen-based cabal – along with their Westminster and Holyrood Parliament / Crown Office / Secret Squirrel Security Services / Plod Squad sodomite - paedo-enablers / cover-up protectors).