Just when you had personally augured the head-shaking conclusion that the asinine, juvenile antics of the House of Conmans – and Upper House of Frauds – assembled ‘dignitaries’ (sic) could not become any more of a burlesque fiasco – and opined the same to your best non-binary, gender-fluid buddy over beer, skittles n crisps down at the local Transgender Bar – then things in Wicked Worstminster were pre-destined to go totally tits-up n ga-ga that same week – with that sanctimonious, self-righteous cunt of a gobshite Karen, Mangela ‘AirPods’ Rayner, miniskirt clad with crotchless knickers, and reportedly flashing her nasty ranga gash at Batshit Boris from a strategic Labour front bench ‘distraction locus’.
Worse still, one as-yet ‘un-named’ Tory back bencher (Farmer Neil Parish - MP for Wankford-on-Sea) has been grassed up to the party whips by the pair of Tory contemporary female MPs who sat either side of him - for watching a mix of tractor ploughing matches 'and' hard core porno flicks on his smartphone during session – a moral, excommunication-rated sin - and only to be outdone by some shit-stirring Labour shadow cabinet apparatchik scumster attempting to seduce a fellow Welsh Labour MP – the split-arsed variety – confiding she was considered by a conclave of lascivious cross party male MPs to be a vote-winning head-turner, and the sexiest, most shaggable, ‘rising star’ member of the Labour crew – and the onanist hot topic focus of their collective inebriated and vulgar afternoon piss-up chats in the Strangers Bar – all of whom are apparently fantasising and laying wagers against their Parliamentary expense account credit viz who will be the first to bed her.
Rising star vote-winner, eh? Beddable? Shaggable? Well, those qualifications sort of narrows the identity of a likely candidate among Labour’s Welsh female MPs.
Tonia Antoniazzi, Ruth Jones, Anna McMorrin, Christina Rees, Jo Stevens, Jessica Morden, Nia Griffith, Alex Davies-Jones and / or Beth Winter.
https://members.parliament.uk/members/Commons?partyid=15&searchtext=region%3AWales
Go on, click on the Welsh Labour MP link above and use a discerning eye to sort the broomstick merchants from the erotically alluring – and select which of the nine listed – and pictured – female Welsh Labour MPs give you an insta-stiffy - if any at all.
Hmmm, be worth checking the phone records of House of Conmans MPs - see which of these twats has the Killing Kittens elitist sex part website number on speed dial.
As to MP Parish, his credibility-bending excuse is one of searching for a new tractor on Google and came across a Farmer's Delight website, and after logging on discovered, too late, it was devoted to zoophilia and sheep shagging.
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