In today's
'Let's Kick Some Spoiled Royal Ass' nasty news roundup we bring our readers the
latest and greatest hot gossip topic: Brain Dead Wastrels – a timely scandalous
exposé of 'super-rich – on public money - hypocrisy' from Anarchy Central’s
24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – publishing, as always, 'ring of the anvil'
dispatches hand-forged, crafted and tempered into razor-edged bespoke satire
and parody to sate the palates of all budding anti-authoritarian
non-conformists, proto-nihilists and those eclectic career radical,
pro-justice, anarchist revolutionaries who carry the immortal genetic Rh-Neg
recusant bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial - and harbour zero respect or
empathy for the privilege-abusing arrogant authoritarian 0:01% predatory paedo'
elitist Masonic-Satanist oligarchy – aka the Deep State Sabbatean death
cult Corporatocracy - cursed by their exaggerated sense of
entitlement and greed – who, imprudently, have deluded themselves into
believing they rule this world, and all upon its once-pristine mantle.
Princess Meghan Mongoose (aka Mrs Harry Hewitt) has petitioned the US Patents Office to trademark the English word ‘Me’ as her narcissistic, personalised and private ‘object’ pronoun.
However, if such a patent is granted, then the proverbial shit is certain to hit the fandango with academics, as the word had its first recorded use over a thousand years ago - by the Anglo-Saxon English King, Harold Godwinson (Harold II) in 1066, at the Battle of Hastings, in answer to the question: ‘Who’s in charge of this uphill mudslide clusterfuck?’ – to which Harold – chewing a gobfull of seagull pastie - duly replied ‘Me’ – (a tongue-twisted confusion of the Middle French ‘Moi’).
Myopic Meghan’s application was filed recently at the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Archewell Audio, one of several wild-eyed business scam ventures launched by the IQ-deficient Meghan and Harry - revealing that ‘Me’ will be the name of her first series of ‘very personal’ Spotify podcasts - instead of the previously-intended 'Gold.Diggers.com'.
Lol's - a better title would be Meghan's Dog & Pony Show - or The Circus Without a Tent.
As Meghan once confided, during an orgy of self-indulgent, ego massaging to the nauseating, lard-arsed Oprah - (another so-called celeb'-infested TV show hosted by a talentless twat, that bored folks are inclined to watch when they've fuck all better to do - other than self-harm or commit suicide) - "I might only have a Duchess title, but I still regard myself as a fairy tale figure, the 'Princess Me', for the first two letters of my name."
The Archwell company appellation is a wordmark and derives from the name of Harry and Meghan’s eldest child (son? / gender-unconfirmed) ‘Archie’ (aka Archie the Red, first of his name, of the Royal House of Hewitt).
Archewell Corporation is intended to cover a long list of entertainment services with the list including podcasts, TV shows, DVDs, CDs, pirate copy streaming services - and Meghan’s personal skincare business project: Scabs.Gone.
Conversely, the celebrity-fascination of having a family of ‘Royals’ living in the heart of the Montecito ‘celebrity’ community has quickly worn thin – as the titled ‘Sussex’ couple are no longer Royals – merely a pair of intellectually-retarded ‘rich cunt commoners’ behaving badly – due Harry being a cuckoo in the Windsor nest - and such a brain dead tosser - coupled with Meghan’s exaggerated sense of entitlement and abuse of privilege adding insult to the ‘unqualified arrogance’ factor injury – and duly christened by the alternative media as a pair of 'archetype' spoiled wankers.
But WTF did the dumb fuckers expect, invading California’s Sunshite state Santa Barbara / Montecito community and buying up a zillion dollar home? – (now known locally as Fort Hewitt – an act viewed by sensible minds as an ultimate display of ostentatious and obnoxious squandering).
To close with a morsel of celebrity tittle-tattle, as ‘Bend-It Dave’ Beckham has okayed the ginger-mingin Harry bringing along a squad of heavily armed ‘Ranga Corps’ Nazi SS Stormtroopers to guard his snowflake ginger ass, the Hewitt’s are set to attend BoBo Beckham’s mega-$$$ Three Zillion Dollar wedding bash this coming weekend in Palm Beach, Florida - after receiving a personalised invite from the moronic Victoria ‘Posh Shite’ herself – but snubbed attendance at the memorial of His Late Royal Rudeness Greek Grand-Daddy, Prince Philip Schleswig-Holstein-Sonderburg-Glucksburg - even though personally invited by Grandma QE2 Lizzie – aka The Queen – due Harry being denied the reassuring close-in company of his personal ex-22 SAS gung-ho bodyguard detail.
Allergy warning: for readers suffering from HSS (Hypersensitive Snowflake Syndrome) – there is no known EpiPen medication remedy for adverse reactions to the 'politically incorrect' – aka 'the Truth'.
This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane unorthodox irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour and caffeine-boosted public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references, 5G electrosmog radiation, and a chemtrail residue of genetically-modified nano-particle bush telegraph innuendo.
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