Once again, the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.
Known around Whitehall as the type of person who could fuck up a perfectly good anvil, the Rt Hon Ed Bollocks MP – a staunch Gordon Broon stooge and a man equipped with the grandiose title of ‘Secretary of State for Children, Schools and Families’ - working in close collusion with the Ministry for Wasting Time & Money and the Common Purpose social engineering (brainwashing) group - plus the dodgy mind-bending sadists inhabiting Tavistock House - have given the term ‘tilting at windmills’ a nouveau Kafkaesque definition.
In a move that imposes draconian legislation on primary schools – and every other venue of social interaction - teachers must from now on log playground taunts to feed the voracious maw of a new Big Brother government database – which will result in the names and personal details of pupils of a mere five years of age being recorded on the ‘Hate Register’ for life if they dare even say ‘Boo!’ to a goose.
In an example of political correctness gone absolutely stark raving bonkers school heads will be legally bound to list all children on their computerised 'hate registers' who are guilty of making everyday common or garden playground cat-call insults to others.
Under the statutes of this non compos mentis social experiment even minor incidents must be recorded as examples of serious bullying and details kept on a database until the pupil leaves secondary school – at which time they will be transferred to the person’s local Community Watch Gestapo Squad files.
Teachers have been ordered that even if a primary school child uses homophobic or racist words such as ‘faggot’ or ‘golly’ without knowing their meaning, simply explaining to them that such words might be hurtful and upsetting for the ‘faggots’ and ‘gollies’ to whom they were referred, is insufficient and the ‘crime’ has to be recorded - and the offender’s behaviour monitored for future signs of 'hate bullying’ at all stages of development and social interaction.
These ‘hate crimes’ – so reminiscent of Orwell’s ‘thought crimes’ - will also be recorded in databases held by shit-for-brains local council jobsworths and made available to Whitehall and Ministers at the Brussels-based EUSSR to help them devise future anti-bullying campaigns - and select likely sadists for membership of their on-going global war military machine ranks.
The scale of the effort to stop children using homophobic or racist language was revealed after the parents of Frankie Tourettes - a six-year-old primary school pupil at Smegmadale-on-Sea’s St. Sodom’s School for Latter Day Morons - were told that his name would be put on the computerised ‘hate register’ and his unruly social behaviour monitored by the government for life.
Apparently one fellow male pupil – an iffy effeminate type with a perma-suntan whose parents originated in Asia, and known only as Abdul, dropped his pants and whispered in Frankie’s ear ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours” – to which Frankie responded “Fuck off yer Paki Moslem faggot before I stick the nut on yer!”
Hence simply calling a spade ‘a spade’ – even if it was a shovel – got poor little Frankie’s name entered into a perpetual criminal database for ‘homophobic, sectarian and rascist’ remarks – simply due him refusing to be mauled and molested by a dark-skinned Islamic bumboy.
Thus young Tourettes is now labelled the local neighbourhood anti-Christ in the eyes of the Smegmadale-on-Sea Education Authority’s Civil Enforcement Officer – Jacko Bogbrush – a rehabilitated rhubarb addict with an NVQ1 Diploma in Tomcat Whispering whose only claim to fame is the fact he once appeared on the X-Factor doing an impersonation of Anthony Gormless’s “Twat of the North' moron statue.
Bogbrush, formerly employed by the Renta-Thug security agency – received a police caution in 2009 - and an on-the-spot fine of £30 - for harassing a mock turtle at a bus stop.
In another incident last year a seven-year-old girl, Feryl Beryl McTwatt, was reported for 'racist bullying' at her school near Crapford-on-Wye.
Beryl was chased by two eleven-year-old girls, one of whom taunted her that she had chocolate or brown shit on her face. McTwatt shouted back to one of the girls, who was black, with the rejoinder “Go get eff'ed yer golly slapper – at least mine’ll wash off!”
Well, reflecting on the once-futuristic writings of Orwell, Kafka and Aldous Huxley, I don’t know so much about ‘Brave New World’ as it equating more with ‘Totally Fucked Up Britain’.
One day some historian or social philosopher – or perhaps clinical psychoanalyst – will look back, scratch their head in earnest and pronounce “Who the phuck was running this ‘circus without a tent’ pantomime – Wiley T. Coyote?”
When they consider the pathetic state of the coprophagous career bottom feeders that comprised the pettifogging bureaucracy of local government and the self-importance of its officials – and too of Bliar’s - and Broon’s - pervert-ridden government of poofs and kiddie fiddlers, someone is bound to question “Why didn’t humanity use its numerical potential to say NO to the system and cease to cooperate with its own enslavement?”
Sunday, 7 March 2010
Saturday, 6 March 2010
Broon Tops Ranks for Political Hypocrisy
Once again, the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.
UK Slime Minister Gordon ‘Culpability’ Broon today embraces the ranks of those duplicitous political hypocrites who couldn’t tell the truth if they didn’t have a lie ready.
On the one hand Gordon is at the Chilcot Inquiry giving perjurious evidence that he was thumbs up for the invasion of Iraq and the overthrow of Saddam Hussein – whereas in all truth, under the fickle rule of the then-incumbent PM Tony Bliar, Gordon – as Chancellor - suffered from the ‘Mushroom Syndrome’ and was kept in the dark, fed shit and told to get on with counting his beans – and hence never consulted nor asked for his unqualified opinion.
Conversely ex MoD mandarin Sir Kevin Knobitt DSO, appearing before Chilcot & Co’s Whitewash & Coverup Inquiry on February 3rd, gave testimony that rather than support the invasion Gordon Brown "guillotined" defence funding from a dribble to sweet fuck all due throwing one of his habitual fits of Scots bully-boy pique as he had not been privy to Cabinet meetings to discuss attempts to justify an illegal invasion of a sovereign state that presented no threat to anyone – apart from itself.
However, the entire concept of the Chilcot Inquiry is to exonerate Tony Bliar and his equally dodgy stooges from any form of blame for going against the best ministerial advice possible and illegally invading Iraq on the orders of his Zionist masters – and thus getting prosecuted – Nuremberg style – as war criminals - for the slaughter of innocent civilians and the theft of natural resources.
True to his perfidious nature Gordon insists he was not kept in the dark in the run up to the invasion and had been convinced by his own intelligence briefings – gleaned from the inside pages of the Daily Mirror and the BBC’s Children Hour news - that Iraq was a threat to the survival of Western civilisation and "had to be dealt with".
But – and it is a big ‘BUT’ - the main issue for Gordon, according to this morning’s testimony - was that Iraq was in breach of UN resolutions (wrong) - and that "rogue states could not be allowed to flout international law”.
Bravo, nice one Gordon – that’s the best thing you’ve said since assuming office: “rogue states - not be allowed to flout international law”.
Now, here we must tread that razor’s edge of truth and lies as we walk twix the avalanche prone peaks of Gross Hypocrisy.
Prior to appearing before the Chilcot Inquiry today Broon, speaking to a reporter from the Pecksniffs Gazette, defended his decision to radically emasculate the law allowing private persons - or Bolshie campaign groups comprised of moral do-gooders -to expedite the issue of arrest warrants against foreign leaders and military officers visiting Britain - under the statutes of Universal Jurisprudence - for their war crimes in foreign lands.
New Labour’s decision to change the law was made following an arrest warrant being granted against Israeli Opposition Chairslapper Tipzi Livid, who was scheduled to visit London last year.
The former Israeli Genocide Minister reportedly cancelled her trip to Britain in December for fear of being arrested after a court issued the warrant following an application by Palestinian activists who were understandably annoyed concerning the Christmas festive season slaughter of several thousand Palestinian civilians in Gaza in a series of attacks carried out by the IDF on Livid’s orders.
The affair acutely embarrassed Brown’s Labour government – especially when he was woken in the middle of the night by an irate phone call from Baron Rothshite demanding he changed the law – and double-quick – or someone else would be sat in the Prime Minister’s chair that following week – quite possibly Peter Scandalson - and Gordon might just be found dead in his hotel room with a Pestco ‘bag for life’ over his numpty head.
Hence the gospel according to the established Doctrines of Hypocrisy now states – to parrot and misquote the venerable Broon – rather than “rogue states will not be allowed to flout international law” – they will be if Israel is the offender.
Thus not only will this apply to Tipzi Livid visiting the UK but also the rest of the Knesset’s war criminals – and too Mossad assassins travelling on a variety of forged British passports – here purposely to snuff Hamas militia leaders – or simply expedite yet another false flag operation to demonise Islam by blowing up the London Underground train service - again.
Do you think Gordon Broon’s a lying git? Does he really look good in a kilt and long socks? Would you buy a used car from this man? Would you buy a ‘used’ anything from him?
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
Rusty’s Skewed News Views – Purveyors of Bespoke Satire – enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist lobby.
UK Slime Minister Gordon ‘Culpability’ Broon today embraces the ranks of those duplicitous political hypocrites who couldn’t tell the truth if they didn’t have a lie ready.
On the one hand Gordon is at the Chilcot Inquiry giving perjurious evidence that he was thumbs up for the invasion of Iraq and the overthrow of Saddam Hussein – whereas in all truth, under the fickle rule of the then-incumbent PM Tony Bliar, Gordon – as Chancellor - suffered from the ‘Mushroom Syndrome’ and was kept in the dark, fed shit and told to get on with counting his beans – and hence never consulted nor asked for his unqualified opinion.
Conversely ex MoD mandarin Sir Kevin Knobitt DSO, appearing before Chilcot & Co’s Whitewash & Coverup Inquiry on February 3rd, gave testimony that rather than support the invasion Gordon Brown "guillotined" defence funding from a dribble to sweet fuck all due throwing one of his habitual fits of Scots bully-boy pique as he had not been privy to Cabinet meetings to discuss attempts to justify an illegal invasion of a sovereign state that presented no threat to anyone – apart from itself.
However, the entire concept of the Chilcot Inquiry is to exonerate Tony Bliar and his equally dodgy stooges from any form of blame for going against the best ministerial advice possible and illegally invading Iraq on the orders of his Zionist masters – and thus getting prosecuted – Nuremberg style – as war criminals - for the slaughter of innocent civilians and the theft of natural resources.
True to his perfidious nature Gordon insists he was not kept in the dark in the run up to the invasion and had been convinced by his own intelligence briefings – gleaned from the inside pages of the Daily Mirror and the BBC’s Children Hour news - that Iraq was a threat to the survival of Western civilisation and "had to be dealt with".
But – and it is a big ‘BUT’ - the main issue for Gordon, according to this morning’s testimony - was that Iraq was in breach of UN resolutions (wrong) - and that "rogue states could not be allowed to flout international law”.
Bravo, nice one Gordon – that’s the best thing you’ve said since assuming office: “rogue states - not be allowed to flout international law”.
Now, here we must tread that razor’s edge of truth and lies as we walk twix the avalanche prone peaks of Gross Hypocrisy.
Prior to appearing before the Chilcot Inquiry today Broon, speaking to a reporter from the Pecksniffs Gazette, defended his decision to radically emasculate the law allowing private persons - or Bolshie campaign groups comprised of moral do-gooders -to expedite the issue of arrest warrants against foreign leaders and military officers visiting Britain - under the statutes of Universal Jurisprudence - for their war crimes in foreign lands.
New Labour’s decision to change the law was made following an arrest warrant being granted against Israeli Opposition Chairslapper Tipzi Livid, who was scheduled to visit London last year.
The former Israeli Genocide Minister reportedly cancelled her trip to Britain in December for fear of being arrested after a court issued the warrant following an application by Palestinian activists who were understandably annoyed concerning the Christmas festive season slaughter of several thousand Palestinian civilians in Gaza in a series of attacks carried out by the IDF on Livid’s orders.
The affair acutely embarrassed Brown’s Labour government – especially when he was woken in the middle of the night by an irate phone call from Baron Rothshite demanding he changed the law – and double-quick – or someone else would be sat in the Prime Minister’s chair that following week – quite possibly Peter Scandalson - and Gordon might just be found dead in his hotel room with a Pestco ‘bag for life’ over his numpty head.
Hence the gospel according to the established Doctrines of Hypocrisy now states – to parrot and misquote the venerable Broon – rather than “rogue states will not be allowed to flout international law” – they will be if Israel is the offender.
Thus not only will this apply to Tipzi Livid visiting the UK but also the rest of the Knesset’s war criminals – and too Mossad assassins travelling on a variety of forged British passports – here purposely to snuff Hamas militia leaders – or simply expedite yet another false flag operation to demonise Islam by blowing up the London Underground train service - again.
Do you think Gordon Broon’s a lying git? Does he really look good in a kilt and long socks? Would you buy a used car from this man? Would you buy a ‘used’ anything from him?
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
Rusty’s Skewed News Views – Purveyors of Bespoke Satire – enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist lobby.
SA’s Monty Zuma in UK on Mooching Mission
Her Imperial Majesty Queen Liz - and hubby Phil the Greek – aka Virus Man - will formally greet South African President Monty Zuma and members of his National Kleptocracy Party entourage at the start of their three-day state visit to the UK on an official begging bowl mission.
Once the presidential party disembark their Capetown to London double decker bus at the Victoria Coach Station, Mr Zuma and Prince Philip will first whet their sanguinary appetites by sharing a bowl of freshly-slaughtered goat’s blood then move on to review a guard of honour from the 14th Notting Hill Assegai Regiment spearing to death a congregation of rabid crocodiles in the shallows of Hyde Park’s Serpentine boating lake.
They will then join the Monarch and Prime Monster Gordon ‘Incapability’ Brown, plus a gaggle of senior royal hangers-on and civil service jobsworths, for a gourmet ceremonial piss up and cannibal style smorgasbord buffet at the Whitehall branch of McD’s Chew n Spew fast food restaurant.
President Zuma, accompanied by his lard-arsed senior wife, Lulu the Zulu – plus his official polygamist Hottentot harem - will then embark on a carriage procession - drawn by displaced Haitian earthquake refugee orphans - to Buckingham Palace for a display of peasant bashing by the Royal Bullyboy Brigade.
Police officers from Scotland Yard’s CO19 Armed Response ‘Electrician Snuffers’ Unit will be on hand to keep an eye on Zuma’s sticky-fingered, larcenous entourage - and count the silverware and tea spoons.
This will provide Gordon Brown with an opportune excuse to miss another embarrassing session of Prime Minister's Questions in the House of Conmans as he takes part in the welcoming ceremony and avoids being quizzed by Opposition figures on the current internet media story that he’s a raving paedophile and criminally involved in the coverup of a dodgy deviant bigwig’s kiddie fiddling ring north of the border.
However Broon is scheduled to hold talks with Monty Zuma and his Flying Circus on Thursday - with Robert Rhubarbie’s continuing political pantomime in Zimbabwe expected to be high on the agenda - along with Al Bore’s global warming scam, the astronomical price of rice in Iceland – and the shortfall of global confetti production due unseasonable snowfall affecting harvests.
The two leaders are also expected to discuss the soccer World Cup, which South Africa is hosting this summer – if the other participating teams don’t suffer the same fate as the star-crossed Togo squad favourites in the Cup of Nations who fell victim to an unhealthy dose of African sportsmanship crossfire while in Angola for playoffs earlier this year.
England is vying to host the footie World Cup in 2018 – if it can ever get its proverbial act together and not make a total bollocks of hosting the 2012 Olympics in London.
BBC world affairs correspondent Peter Sychophant told the Jolly Golly Gosh programme that Zuma - a polygamist who has married at least forty-five times - is renowned for his charm and informality – and groping other people’s womenfolk.
Conversely Zuma recently experienced a public backlash after acknowledging he had fathered yet another unwanted child, his 200th, with the wife of his Minister for Graft & Corruption, Mr Julius Chuckabutty.
The controversial Zuma has previously faced an entire conglomeration of criminal charges – from Arse Banditry to Corruption to Murder to Rape to Zoophilia – and back to Beastiality – all of which have been dropped due a lack of living witnesses.
During his trip Zuma – a former rhubarb addict - will visit several of his close relatives at the Regent Park Zoo to hand out bunches of fresh bananas from the Cape province – and also meet Tory leader Posh Dave Cameron and Lib-Dem chief Nick Clogg in the salubrious private comfort of one of Soho’s discreet lap dancing bars to discuss arms sales and wind farm technology.
On Thursday Zuma is scheduled to make a trip to the very big hole in the ground that currently constitutes the site of the Olympic Park Stadium at Shitborough Hamlets in East London, with Olympics Minister Tessa Bowells.
Later that evening Mr Zuma will give a speech during a banquet at Achmed’s Fish & Chip Bistro, next door to the Guildhall on Gresham Street – to be hosted by the Mayor of London – Bonkers Boris Nonsense.
On Friday, the final day of the visit, Zuma will formally say bye-bye to the Queen before calling in to say ‘Hi’ to the Prince of Wales at Clarence House for a quick chat with his pet plants and a grope at Camilla’s ‘Duchy Originals’ boob job knockers.
Then it will be back on their double decker bus for the long drive across the currently-frozen North Atlantic to visit Zuma’s good African friend President Barky O’Barmy, who was born just a ways up the road from Cape Town - in Kenya.
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
Once the presidential party disembark their Capetown to London double decker bus at the Victoria Coach Station, Mr Zuma and Prince Philip will first whet their sanguinary appetites by sharing a bowl of freshly-slaughtered goat’s blood then move on to review a guard of honour from the 14th Notting Hill Assegai Regiment spearing to death a congregation of rabid crocodiles in the shallows of Hyde Park’s Serpentine boating lake.
They will then join the Monarch and Prime Monster Gordon ‘Incapability’ Brown, plus a gaggle of senior royal hangers-on and civil service jobsworths, for a gourmet ceremonial piss up and cannibal style smorgasbord buffet at the Whitehall branch of McD’s Chew n Spew fast food restaurant.
President Zuma, accompanied by his lard-arsed senior wife, Lulu the Zulu – plus his official polygamist Hottentot harem - will then embark on a carriage procession - drawn by displaced Haitian earthquake refugee orphans - to Buckingham Palace for a display of peasant bashing by the Royal Bullyboy Brigade.
Police officers from Scotland Yard’s CO19 Armed Response ‘Electrician Snuffers’ Unit will be on hand to keep an eye on Zuma’s sticky-fingered, larcenous entourage - and count the silverware and tea spoons.
This will provide Gordon Brown with an opportune excuse to miss another embarrassing session of Prime Minister's Questions in the House of Conmans as he takes part in the welcoming ceremony and avoids being quizzed by Opposition figures on the current internet media story that he’s a raving paedophile and criminally involved in the coverup of a dodgy deviant bigwig’s kiddie fiddling ring north of the border.
However Broon is scheduled to hold talks with Monty Zuma and his Flying Circus on Thursday - with Robert Rhubarbie’s continuing political pantomime in Zimbabwe expected to be high on the agenda - along with Al Bore’s global warming scam, the astronomical price of rice in Iceland – and the shortfall of global confetti production due unseasonable snowfall affecting harvests.
The two leaders are also expected to discuss the soccer World Cup, which South Africa is hosting this summer – if the other participating teams don’t suffer the same fate as the star-crossed Togo squad favourites in the Cup of Nations who fell victim to an unhealthy dose of African sportsmanship crossfire while in Angola for playoffs earlier this year.
England is vying to host the footie World Cup in 2018 – if it can ever get its proverbial act together and not make a total bollocks of hosting the 2012 Olympics in London.
BBC world affairs correspondent Peter Sychophant told the Jolly Golly Gosh programme that Zuma - a polygamist who has married at least forty-five times - is renowned for his charm and informality – and groping other people’s womenfolk.
Conversely Zuma recently experienced a public backlash after acknowledging he had fathered yet another unwanted child, his 200th, with the wife of his Minister for Graft & Corruption, Mr Julius Chuckabutty.
The controversial Zuma has previously faced an entire conglomeration of criminal charges – from Arse Banditry to Corruption to Murder to Rape to Zoophilia – and back to Beastiality – all of which have been dropped due a lack of living witnesses.
During his trip Zuma – a former rhubarb addict - will visit several of his close relatives at the Regent Park Zoo to hand out bunches of fresh bananas from the Cape province – and also meet Tory leader Posh Dave Cameron and Lib-Dem chief Nick Clogg in the salubrious private comfort of one of Soho’s discreet lap dancing bars to discuss arms sales and wind farm technology.
On Thursday Zuma is scheduled to make a trip to the very big hole in the ground that currently constitutes the site of the Olympic Park Stadium at Shitborough Hamlets in East London, with Olympics Minister Tessa Bowells.
Later that evening Mr Zuma will give a speech during a banquet at Achmed’s Fish & Chip Bistro, next door to the Guildhall on Gresham Street – to be hosted by the Mayor of London – Bonkers Boris Nonsense.
On Friday, the final day of the visit, Zuma will formally say bye-bye to the Queen before calling in to say ‘Hi’ to the Prince of Wales at Clarence House for a quick chat with his pet plants and a grope at Camilla’s ‘Duchy Originals’ boob job knockers.
Then it will be back on their double decker bus for the long drive across the currently-frozen North Atlantic to visit Zuma’s good African friend President Barky O’Barmy, who was born just a ways up the road from Cape Town - in Kenya.
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
Friday, 5 March 2010
Pompous Krauts Tell Greeks – Sell the Acropolis
Once again, the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.
The ultimately brazen German delegation currently inhabiting the EUSSR’s hallowed Halls of Official Corruption in Brussels have demanded that the inept government of a freshly-bankrupt Greece start selling off their 5,773 ‘uninhabited’ islands in the Aegean and Ionian Seas to raise money and pay off its burgeoning debts that are pulling down the value of the battered Euro – and making the rest of the community look like a bunch of retarded krunts.
The current disparaging gospels being broadcast by the Brussels-based political allies of German Chancellor Angela Wankel state that Greece should start auctioning off the uninhabited islands to cut its financial encumbrances and curtail national insolvency – before it spreads like an economic contagion and infects the rest of the bloated European super-state that has so far survived more on scent than actual substance.
German MEPs Gertrude Schweinenslippe, a senior member of Chancellor Wankel's Christian Fat Cats Party – along with Franz Scheissefegger of the Holohoax Deniers Party - informed ‘Der Grunter’ that the Greek state should sell stakes in all its assets to raise more cash.
"Auction off your spare islands, you bankrupt Greeks - and the Acropolis too!" declares the insolent banner headline in the gutter press tabloid ‘Der Grunter’.
While typical of bellicose Kraut arrogance - bearing in mind the Acropolis is classified as a UNESCO World Heritage site - the Parthenon, Erechtheum and the Propyleae are reckoned to be a builder’s nightmare for restoration and turning into modern-day tourist attractions – such as hotels, casinos, night clubs and brothels – especially so considering the fact none of the structures were ever designed for en suite bathrooms and flush crappers – nor gas and electricity.
Suggestions that a full restoration programme could benefit from the latest and greatest in carbon credit cap n trade exchange brownie points (and mega-bucks loans) – thus employing clean n green hi-tech power systems such as wind turbines, solar panels and geothermal heating – were given the big finger by the Athens-based Department of Antiquities who informed the Slum Dwellers Gazette “We like our archaeology and ruins looking just the way they are - old and fucked up – not brand spanking new.”
However Greek Prime Minister Kostas Fukinopolis and members of his belaugered cabinet reacted with caustic vehemence to the German hubris - expressing their views to Pox News with a unanimous “Who the fuck are we going to sell the islands to?”
“There’s only oil-rich Arabs, exiled Russian oligarch zillionaires and Third World dictators looking for a future hidey hole that are likely to have the up-front cash to afford their own island – and most of them have bought one already.”
Conversely, the blue waters of the Aegean are some of the country's most valuable assets – comprised of 6,000-odd islands, of which only 227 are inhabited – and the majority of those are already privately owned by that arrogant elitist 1% super-rich comprising our corrupt global society who consider themselves worthier of reward and seem to require far more than they need to live at a higher standard than the common poverty-stricken peasants their dynasties have spent millenniums stealing from.
Kraut MEP Gertrude Schweinenslippe, applying her customary haughty logic, told the Greek delegation at the Brussels economic summit that they should begin by selling their half of Cyprus back to Turkey – whom it really belongs to anyway – and still remains an intractable political problem plaguing relations between the two countries – with Turkey ending up with the eastern, ‘thin end of the wedge’ – so to speak – following independence from the British colonialists in 1960.
According to one specialised real-estate website, while the Greek islands evoke images of sunglass-sporting deposed dictators and drug lords slurping flutes of Dom Perignon champagne and shagging trios of tanned, blonde nymphomaniacs on enormous yachts, the reality is your own personalised island could cost as little as US$2 million (£1.3 million quid) – including the odd village full of ouzo-swilling Zorba look-alikes, fat arsed grannies with abysmal dentistry - and a few goats.
Relatively affordable to say the least – unless, of course, you're a bankrupt Greek peasant with a credit rating of minus zero.
Rumours that the United States Secretary of Sleaze Hilarious Rodent Clinton has dug into her offshore criminal earnings from the Arkansas Shitewater scams and the Mena Mafia drug money to launch a bid for the Aegean island of Lesbos - as a vacation hideaway to accommodate her Sapphic dildoing friends - still remain rumours.
Would you buy a Greek island? How about Mount Olympus? Could you claim Greek citizenship? Would you qualify for UK non-dom’ tax exemption status? Are Greek women really three-holers? Do Tesco’s and Pizza Hut have a home delivery service around the Ionian Sea?
* Carbon Credit Cap & Trade Exchange declaration: No trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees, small furry mammals – or delicate Greek sensibilities – were disturbed in posting this message. However, a large number of pompous Germans were temporarily upset.
The ultimately brazen German delegation currently inhabiting the EUSSR’s hallowed Halls of Official Corruption in Brussels have demanded that the inept government of a freshly-bankrupt Greece start selling off their 5,773 ‘uninhabited’ islands in the Aegean and Ionian Seas to raise money and pay off its burgeoning debts that are pulling down the value of the battered Euro – and making the rest of the community look like a bunch of retarded krunts.
The current disparaging gospels being broadcast by the Brussels-based political allies of German Chancellor Angela Wankel state that Greece should start auctioning off the uninhabited islands to cut its financial encumbrances and curtail national insolvency – before it spreads like an economic contagion and infects the rest of the bloated European super-state that has so far survived more on scent than actual substance.
German MEPs Gertrude Schweinenslippe, a senior member of Chancellor Wankel's Christian Fat Cats Party – along with Franz Scheissefegger of the Holohoax Deniers Party - informed ‘Der Grunter’ that the Greek state should sell stakes in all its assets to raise more cash.
"Auction off your spare islands, you bankrupt Greeks - and the Acropolis too!" declares the insolent banner headline in the gutter press tabloid ‘Der Grunter’.
While typical of bellicose Kraut arrogance - bearing in mind the Acropolis is classified as a UNESCO World Heritage site - the Parthenon, Erechtheum and the Propyleae are reckoned to be a builder’s nightmare for restoration and turning into modern-day tourist attractions – such as hotels, casinos, night clubs and brothels – especially so considering the fact none of the structures were ever designed for en suite bathrooms and flush crappers – nor gas and electricity.
Suggestions that a full restoration programme could benefit from the latest and greatest in carbon credit cap n trade exchange brownie points (and mega-bucks loans) – thus employing clean n green hi-tech power systems such as wind turbines, solar panels and geothermal heating – were given the big finger by the Athens-based Department of Antiquities who informed the Slum Dwellers Gazette “We like our archaeology and ruins looking just the way they are - old and fucked up – not brand spanking new.”
However Greek Prime Minister Kostas Fukinopolis and members of his belaugered cabinet reacted with caustic vehemence to the German hubris - expressing their views to Pox News with a unanimous “Who the fuck are we going to sell the islands to?”
“There’s only oil-rich Arabs, exiled Russian oligarch zillionaires and Third World dictators looking for a future hidey hole that are likely to have the up-front cash to afford their own island – and most of them have bought one already.”
Conversely, the blue waters of the Aegean are some of the country's most valuable assets – comprised of 6,000-odd islands, of which only 227 are inhabited – and the majority of those are already privately owned by that arrogant elitist 1% super-rich comprising our corrupt global society who consider themselves worthier of reward and seem to require far more than they need to live at a higher standard than the common poverty-stricken peasants their dynasties have spent millenniums stealing from.
Kraut MEP Gertrude Schweinenslippe, applying her customary haughty logic, told the Greek delegation at the Brussels economic summit that they should begin by selling their half of Cyprus back to Turkey – whom it really belongs to anyway – and still remains an intractable political problem plaguing relations between the two countries – with Turkey ending up with the eastern, ‘thin end of the wedge’ – so to speak – following independence from the British colonialists in 1960.
According to one specialised real-estate website, while the Greek islands evoke images of sunglass-sporting deposed dictators and drug lords slurping flutes of Dom Perignon champagne and shagging trios of tanned, blonde nymphomaniacs on enormous yachts, the reality is your own personalised island could cost as little as US$2 million (£1.3 million quid) – including the odd village full of ouzo-swilling Zorba look-alikes, fat arsed grannies with abysmal dentistry - and a few goats.
Relatively affordable to say the least – unless, of course, you're a bankrupt Greek peasant with a credit rating of minus zero.
Rumours that the United States Secretary of Sleaze Hilarious Rodent Clinton has dug into her offshore criminal earnings from the Arkansas Shitewater scams and the Mena Mafia drug money to launch a bid for the Aegean island of Lesbos - as a vacation hideaway to accommodate her Sapphic dildoing friends - still remain rumours.
Would you buy a Greek island? How about Mount Olympus? Could you claim Greek citizenship? Would you qualify for UK non-dom’ tax exemption status? Are Greek women really three-holers? Do Tesco’s and Pizza Hut have a home delivery service around the Ionian Sea?
* Carbon Credit Cap & Trade Exchange declaration: No trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees, small furry mammals – or delicate Greek sensibilities – were disturbed in posting this message. However, a large number of pompous Germans were temporarily upset.
Rodent Back-Stabs UK Over Falklands
Once again, the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.
The super-bitch hypocrite currently posing as the US Secretary of Sleaze - Hilarious Rodent Clinton – joined Argentinian President Chlamydia de Korruptioni at a press conference in Buenos Aires last night – the eye-popping text of which has just been released by the State Department.
The Rodent’s duplicitous remarks represent an astonishing propaganda coup for the Peronist regime in its dispute with Britain over the Falklands, with Clinton – vigorously promoting President Barky O’Barmy’s – and too Washington’s - political positions - brazenly backing the Argentinian claim that the Malvinas Islands (Falklands) are theirs – and Britain are de facto buccaneering interlopers out to exploit the region’s oil wealth.
President Korruptioni told the assembled media “We would like Britain to sit down at the table and address these negotiations within the framework of the UN’s decolonisation statutes and have the US as a country friendly to Argentina to arbitrate the negotiations.”
The Rodent was quick to get herself on camera and pronounced she wanted Argentina and the United Kingdom sat down to resolve the issues between them across the table in a peaceful, productive way - much the same as the US had done concerning its disagreement with Iraq and Saddam Hussein in 2003.
The US Secretary of Sleaze has thus given her full support for the official stance of Buenos Aires, despite the fact that Great Britain has made it clear that the sovereignty of the Falklands is non-negotiable – and that Argentina can “go fuck itself”.
Further the Rodent makes no reference to the fact that Argentina belligerently threatened a naval blockade of the Falklands only recently to disrupt Britain’s scheduled positioning of an offshore drilling rig - or that its close ally (and US arch-enemy) President Hugo Numpty of Venezuela has been threatening war against Britain over the dispute – even though his country is located at the other end of the basket case South American continent – and a zillion sea miles from the UK - or Argentina.
Standing behind her designer teleprompter and sided by personal assistant Sapphie Dildodo, the Rodent further informed the assembled media hacks that “Argentina has been a good friend to Kenyan President O’Barmy and deserves our support on this matter – especially so as the Malvinas Islands are definitely within their geo-political sphere and should be theirs to exploit the oil wealth – with US assistance obviously.”
The Rodent’s hypocritical stance has effected a most adverse knee-jerk response in London where a furious diplomatic complaint was lodged with the US Embassy in Grosvenor Square – in the form of a typed sheet of A4 wrapped around a house brick and lobbed through the Ambassador’s bedroom window by one of MI5’s champion tomcat chuckers.
According to one whistleblower at Whitehall’s Snitch & Grassers Department, the gist of the complaint centres on the strikingly poor judgment of the Rodent – for while currying up favour with the third rate Latin American kleptocracy that Argentina has represented for centuries – just to hear the sound of her own monotonous voice - she is alienating America’s most loyal and valuable global ally.
The diplomatic ‘note’ closes with the message that if the Rodent’s backing of the Argentine regime is now official US government policy, then the US has 24 hours to vacate the military bases – of troops, ordnance and strategic nukes – from the UK’s green and pleasant sceptred isle forthwith.
The intended boycott of all goods originating in the US –and the dissolution of all further support for their rogue client state of Israel - and Zionism in general – will be delivered via the medium of another well-aimed brick once the Privy Council have signed it.
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
The super-bitch hypocrite currently posing as the US Secretary of Sleaze - Hilarious Rodent Clinton – joined Argentinian President Chlamydia de Korruptioni at a press conference in Buenos Aires last night – the eye-popping text of which has just been released by the State Department.
The Rodent’s duplicitous remarks represent an astonishing propaganda coup for the Peronist regime in its dispute with Britain over the Falklands, with Clinton – vigorously promoting President Barky O’Barmy’s – and too Washington’s - political positions - brazenly backing the Argentinian claim that the Malvinas Islands (Falklands) are theirs – and Britain are de facto buccaneering interlopers out to exploit the region’s oil wealth.
President Korruptioni told the assembled media “We would like Britain to sit down at the table and address these negotiations within the framework of the UN’s decolonisation statutes and have the US as a country friendly to Argentina to arbitrate the negotiations.”
The Rodent was quick to get herself on camera and pronounced she wanted Argentina and the United Kingdom sat down to resolve the issues between them across the table in a peaceful, productive way - much the same as the US had done concerning its disagreement with Iraq and Saddam Hussein in 2003.
The US Secretary of Sleaze has thus given her full support for the official stance of Buenos Aires, despite the fact that Great Britain has made it clear that the sovereignty of the Falklands is non-negotiable – and that Argentina can “go fuck itself”.
Further the Rodent makes no reference to the fact that Argentina belligerently threatened a naval blockade of the Falklands only recently to disrupt Britain’s scheduled positioning of an offshore drilling rig - or that its close ally (and US arch-enemy) President Hugo Numpty of Venezuela has been threatening war against Britain over the dispute – even though his country is located at the other end of the basket case South American continent – and a zillion sea miles from the UK - or Argentina.
Standing behind her designer teleprompter and sided by personal assistant Sapphie Dildodo, the Rodent further informed the assembled media hacks that “Argentina has been a good friend to Kenyan President O’Barmy and deserves our support on this matter – especially so as the Malvinas Islands are definitely within their geo-political sphere and should be theirs to exploit the oil wealth – with US assistance obviously.”
The Rodent’s hypocritical stance has effected a most adverse knee-jerk response in London where a furious diplomatic complaint was lodged with the US Embassy in Grosvenor Square – in the form of a typed sheet of A4 wrapped around a house brick and lobbed through the Ambassador’s bedroom window by one of MI5’s champion tomcat chuckers.
According to one whistleblower at Whitehall’s Snitch & Grassers Department, the gist of the complaint centres on the strikingly poor judgment of the Rodent – for while currying up favour with the third rate Latin American kleptocracy that Argentina has represented for centuries – just to hear the sound of her own monotonous voice - she is alienating America’s most loyal and valuable global ally.
The diplomatic ‘note’ closes with the message that if the Rodent’s backing of the Argentine regime is now official US government policy, then the US has 24 hours to vacate the military bases – of troops, ordnance and strategic nukes – from the UK’s green and pleasant sceptred isle forthwith.
The intended boycott of all goods originating in the US –and the dissolution of all further support for their rogue client state of Israel - and Zionism in general – will be delivered via the medium of another well-aimed brick once the Privy Council have signed it.
Thought for the day: If a bear shits in the woods and there’s no-one around to smell it, does it still stink?
Thursday, 4 March 2010
Scots Nix Sex Offender Alert Scheme
Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill.
A ‘Pervert Detection’ scheme known as ‘Sarah’ Law’ that will allow parents, vulnerable paranoid gays, single women posing as vestal virgins – and sheep farmers - to check if someone in their neighbourhood is a sex offender will be rolled out across England and Wales by March 2015, according to one report just leaked to the media from Whitehall’s Snitch & Grassers Department for Advanced Shit-Stirring.
A similar scheme to Sarah’s Law was to be launched in Scotland but due the abysmal failure of Edinburgh’s corrupt ruling elite in the Holyrood Parliament to stamp out the scandalous raving paedophile rings operating for decades around the country’s Grampian crime capital of Aberdeen, the idea has been archived with an ‘indefinite postponement’ label attached.
According to Holyrood insider Jimmy McTwatt “How the phuck can the scheme work north of the border when the dodgy Masonic- controlled police force purposely ignores a parent’s complaints - and crooked lawyers simply slap an interdict on anyone campaigning for the prosecution of the powers that be for molesting underage kids – then charge them with a breach of the peace to gag them.”
However, in England and Wales, under the intended scheme parents will be able to log onto the government’s Spot-a-Paedo website to check if any of their children’s school teachers have convictions for kiddie fiddling – or which local council officials and magistrates – and other neighbourhood ranking establishment Freemason worthies - have been caught with their proverbial ‘pants down’ while engaged in vile acts of al fresco wanking, cottaging, dogging - or shagging underage ewes.
A pilot scheme initiated around Smegmashire’s Ferryhill-on-Sea area last year resulted in the scandalous discovery that the local government was infested with kiddie fiddling pederasts – from the wheelie bin operatives to social workers, boy scout troop leaders, vicars and priests, solicitors, special needs school teachers, doctors and nurses, police officers, magistrates, town councillors and even their New Labour MP – Sir Irwin Bogbrush.
This festering den of iniquity became exposed and public knowledge when one group of concerned parents contacted the police ‘and’ the national press after their dodgy neighbour – Bastardi Fuctifino - a Portuguese ice cream van driver - had begun offering bowls of drug-laced tapas to their children. Police confirmed that the individual was a registered sex offender who had been banned from contacting children – and selling ice cream – or tapas.
Fuctifino was arrested and remanded in custody for breaching the statutes of his parole – awaiting deportation back to the paedophile haven of Praia da Luz in the Algarve – but not before blowing the whistle on his fellow Masonic kiddie fiddlers comprising the ranks of the local gentry and governing establishment who had promised to protect him from prosecution – then turned their collective backs on his predicament as the wolves of justice sated their bloodthirsty jaws on his sacrificial, scapegoat carcass.
However, before his deposition could be given to a Parliamentary committee, Fuctifino was found dead in a solitary confinement cell at Bellmarsh Prison with thirty-eight stab wounds in his back, which the Ferryhill-on-Sea coroner, Sir Marmaduke Mullett, declared was the most determined case of suicide he’d ever come across.
Conversely, following the success of the Ferryhill-on-Sea sex offender disclosure pilot project, it has been calculated by concerned parent networking groups that the Pervert Detection scheme and the juxtaposed Spot-a-Paedo website will hopefully serve to grind the heel of Justice’s jackboot into the midst of the once-untouchable bigwig-run pederast rings operating throughout England and Wales – and further function to embarrass and shame any honest members of Scotland’s vice-ridden corrupt judicial establishment to adopt the scheme also.
The overall success of the Sarah’s Law project – while being a diluted copycat version of the US-legislated sex offender disclosure project - Megan’s Law – still lies with the commitment of ‘honest’ members of government to resource the programme efficiently and ensure it is enforced and appropriately monitored.
Further the scheme is intended to serve to prevent a recurrence of the disgraceful Thomas Watt Hamilton / Dunblane schoolkids massacre scandal that was investigated by Lord Cullen - and his damning findings into the calumnious involvement of the Scottish hierarchy paedo’s concealed from public view for 100 years to prevent their censure and prosecution.
A ‘Pervert Detection’ scheme known as ‘Sarah’ Law’ that will allow parents, vulnerable paranoid gays, single women posing as vestal virgins – and sheep farmers - to check if someone in their neighbourhood is a sex offender will be rolled out across England and Wales by March 2015, according to one report just leaked to the media from Whitehall’s Snitch & Grassers Department for Advanced Shit-Stirring.
A similar scheme to Sarah’s Law was to be launched in Scotland but due the abysmal failure of Edinburgh’s corrupt ruling elite in the Holyrood Parliament to stamp out the scandalous raving paedophile rings operating for decades around the country’s Grampian crime capital of Aberdeen, the idea has been archived with an ‘indefinite postponement’ label attached.
According to Holyrood insider Jimmy McTwatt “How the phuck can the scheme work north of the border when the dodgy Masonic- controlled police force purposely ignores a parent’s complaints - and crooked lawyers simply slap an interdict on anyone campaigning for the prosecution of the powers that be for molesting underage kids – then charge them with a breach of the peace to gag them.”
However, in England and Wales, under the intended scheme parents will be able to log onto the government’s Spot-a-Paedo website to check if any of their children’s school teachers have convictions for kiddie fiddling – or which local council officials and magistrates – and other neighbourhood ranking establishment Freemason worthies - have been caught with their proverbial ‘pants down’ while engaged in vile acts of al fresco wanking, cottaging, dogging - or shagging underage ewes.
A pilot scheme initiated around Smegmashire’s Ferryhill-on-Sea area last year resulted in the scandalous discovery that the local government was infested with kiddie fiddling pederasts – from the wheelie bin operatives to social workers, boy scout troop leaders, vicars and priests, solicitors, special needs school teachers, doctors and nurses, police officers, magistrates, town councillors and even their New Labour MP – Sir Irwin Bogbrush.
This festering den of iniquity became exposed and public knowledge when one group of concerned parents contacted the police ‘and’ the national press after their dodgy neighbour – Bastardi Fuctifino - a Portuguese ice cream van driver - had begun offering bowls of drug-laced tapas to their children. Police confirmed that the individual was a registered sex offender who had been banned from contacting children – and selling ice cream – or tapas.
Fuctifino was arrested and remanded in custody for breaching the statutes of his parole – awaiting deportation back to the paedophile haven of Praia da Luz in the Algarve – but not before blowing the whistle on his fellow Masonic kiddie fiddlers comprising the ranks of the local gentry and governing establishment who had promised to protect him from prosecution – then turned their collective backs on his predicament as the wolves of justice sated their bloodthirsty jaws on his sacrificial, scapegoat carcass.
However, before his deposition could be given to a Parliamentary committee, Fuctifino was found dead in a solitary confinement cell at Bellmarsh Prison with thirty-eight stab wounds in his back, which the Ferryhill-on-Sea coroner, Sir Marmaduke Mullett, declared was the most determined case of suicide he’d ever come across.
Conversely, following the success of the Ferryhill-on-Sea sex offender disclosure pilot project, it has been calculated by concerned parent networking groups that the Pervert Detection scheme and the juxtaposed Spot-a-Paedo website will hopefully serve to grind the heel of Justice’s jackboot into the midst of the once-untouchable bigwig-run pederast rings operating throughout England and Wales – and further function to embarrass and shame any honest members of Scotland’s vice-ridden corrupt judicial establishment to adopt the scheme also.
The overall success of the Sarah’s Law project – while being a diluted copycat version of the US-legislated sex offender disclosure project - Megan’s Law – still lies with the commitment of ‘honest’ members of government to resource the programme efficiently and ensure it is enforced and appropriately monitored.
Further the scheme is intended to serve to prevent a recurrence of the disgraceful Thomas Watt Hamilton / Dunblane schoolkids massacre scandal that was investigated by Lord Cullen - and his damning findings into the calumnious involvement of the Scottish hierarchy paedo’s concealed from public view for 100 years to prevent their censure and prosecution.
Princess Anne Terrifies the Taliban
Annie Phillips, the equine-faced Princess Royal, has made a surprise visit to British troops in Afghanistan on her way back from pony trekking across the Hindu Kush with guides from the British Army’s ‘18th Sepoy Light Body Bag Regiment’.
Princess Anne, who was accompanied by her customary rabid pack of kiddie-ripping English bull terriers – spent a couple of hours assisting the NATO troops ferreting out Taliban stragglers from their deep cave hideouts around Marjah in Bellend Province.
Sgt. Jack Snott from the 21st Cannon Fodder Regiment told a reporter from the Warmongers Gazette “The Princess woz just great – she loosed her pack of bull terriers led by the famous Potty Dotty and the Taliban shit proverbial kittens – running out of their mountain cave strongholds wiv hands held high and screaming “Allah save us from this infidel harpy bitch!”
“Wot a woman – kitted out in a Kevlar burkha an’ armed wiv her ridin’ crop – an’ those massive teeth too. Wish I woz an effin’ horse so she could ride me.”
Conversely critical reports of war crimes have been filed with the Red Cross in Kabul following Princess Anne’s little skirmish – concerning the deaths of several Taliban combatants who had thrown down their weapons but were subsequently savaged by the rat-snouted bull terrier pack leader Potty Dotty – as Anne sat on her fat arse wholly unconcerned - exchanging text messages concerning an order of fish fingers for this weekend’s homecoming banquet with her Gatcombe Park estate homicidal chef – the psychopathic Steffan Pissheadsky.
Anne later informed Rutger Fuctifino, the Afghan-based Red Cross chief, that Potty the pit bull was a good natured dog "lacking in malice – and had simply acted in self-defence when the Taliban scallies had tried to fend her off with kicks from their steel toe-capped combat sandals.
However this is not the first occasion that Potty Dottyhas been the centre of controversy’s limelight. Anne was convicted of serious offences under the Dangerous Bow-Wow’s Act 1991 after Potty attacked two small bite-sized children in Great Windsor Park after apparently mistaking them for its lunch.
Potty Dotty further blotted its proverbial good behaviour copybook when accompanying the bat-eared Princess to Sandringham one Christmas and decided to rip the Queen’s oldest and dearest pet Welsh corgi - ‘Taffy Bach’ - to ribbons for a bit of a doggy giggle.
Rumour has it that fast acting security guards were able to salvage enough of the shredded corgi to justify an official funeral – and when a severely distraught and inconsolable Queen Liz was asked if she wanted them to put Potty Dotty ‘down’ she responded with “You can shoot the mongrel dog and Princess Horseface for all I care.”
Adding insult to further injury Potty Dotty sealed her fate the following week by savaging one of Princess Anne’s maids at Gatcombe Park, severing her leg at the knee – since when the dog had been muzzled and confined to its garden kennel undergoing a course of ‘behavioural retraining’ expedited by a qualified ‘pooch psychiatrist’ - armed with a cattle prod and a baseball bat.
Princess Anne, who was accompanied by her customary rabid pack of kiddie-ripping English bull terriers – spent a couple of hours assisting the NATO troops ferreting out Taliban stragglers from their deep cave hideouts around Marjah in Bellend Province.
Sgt. Jack Snott from the 21st Cannon Fodder Regiment told a reporter from the Warmongers Gazette “The Princess woz just great – she loosed her pack of bull terriers led by the famous Potty Dotty and the Taliban shit proverbial kittens – running out of their mountain cave strongholds wiv hands held high and screaming “Allah save us from this infidel harpy bitch!”
“Wot a woman – kitted out in a Kevlar burkha an’ armed wiv her ridin’ crop – an’ those massive teeth too. Wish I woz an effin’ horse so she could ride me.”
Conversely critical reports of war crimes have been filed with the Red Cross in Kabul following Princess Anne’s little skirmish – concerning the deaths of several Taliban combatants who had thrown down their weapons but were subsequently savaged by the rat-snouted bull terrier pack leader Potty Dotty – as Anne sat on her fat arse wholly unconcerned - exchanging text messages concerning an order of fish fingers for this weekend’s homecoming banquet with her Gatcombe Park estate homicidal chef – the psychopathic Steffan Pissheadsky.
Anne later informed Rutger Fuctifino, the Afghan-based Red Cross chief, that Potty the pit bull was a good natured dog "lacking in malice – and had simply acted in self-defence when the Taliban scallies had tried to fend her off with kicks from their steel toe-capped combat sandals.
However this is not the first occasion that Potty Dottyhas been the centre of controversy’s limelight. Anne was convicted of serious offences under the Dangerous Bow-Wow’s Act 1991 after Potty attacked two small bite-sized children in Great Windsor Park after apparently mistaking them for its lunch.
Potty Dotty further blotted its proverbial good behaviour copybook when accompanying the bat-eared Princess to Sandringham one Christmas and decided to rip the Queen’s oldest and dearest pet Welsh corgi - ‘Taffy Bach’ - to ribbons for a bit of a doggy giggle.
Rumour has it that fast acting security guards were able to salvage enough of the shredded corgi to justify an official funeral – and when a severely distraught and inconsolable Queen Liz was asked if she wanted them to put Potty Dotty ‘down’ she responded with “You can shoot the mongrel dog and Princess Horseface for all I care.”
Adding insult to further injury Potty Dotty sealed her fate the following week by savaging one of Princess Anne’s maids at Gatcombe Park, severing her leg at the knee – since when the dog had been muzzled and confined to its garden kennel undergoing a course of ‘behavioural retraining’ expedited by a qualified ‘pooch psychiatrist’ - armed with a cattle prod and a baseball bat.
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