In the immortal words of John Stuart Mill, ‘Landlords grow rich in their sleep’.
An updated version of JSM’s astute quote might read: ‘Asylum housing fixers and middlemen agents grow richer whether asleep or awake – come rain or shine’.
The Tory Nasty Party government of Food Bank Britain (formerly Broken Britain) stands accused of being a not-fit-for-purpose soft touch, and guilty of gross incompetence regarding the waves of ‘foreign-type’ illegal economic migrants, impersonating conflict zone refugees seeking asylum, who are setting off from the shores of ‘safe haven’ France in overloaded rubber boats, and invading the south coast beaches of our once-sceptred isle – sans visas, means of support, or even a basic English ‘please & thank you’ phrase book.
Due acquiescence to some international human rights statutes viz anyone waving a ‘refugee’ sign, our useless Border Force patrols fail to turn these inflatable rubber water craft around mid-Channel and point them back to the far Gromboolian plains from which they came – in this instance the north coast beaches of France – yet instead load them aboard their own cutters, then provide orange wet weather coats and safe passage to the Kent port of Dover.
And here silly international laws relating to any fucker and their dog claiming to be a war zone refugee and seeking asylum force the UK government’s hand to provide welfare protection status – until, on an individual basis, each illegal is processed – and either deported or bestowed with a ‘set for life’ national insurance number.
Ergo, now for the nitty gritty viz the above paragraph, for these illegals have then to be provided with shelter and three square meals per day – and the basics of civilised existence: clothing, bedding, bathing and laundry facilities – and for the bearded male refugees doggedly identifying as children – shaving kits.
To wit, due yet another Tory Party 'magnum mendacium', this paradoxical anomaly has unconsciously commissioned the opening of a veritable treasure chest of opportunities for fast buck middle men – aka ‘arch-quango-vermin’ / ‘government contract parasites’ - to cash in on inherent establishment incompetence, and a gross lack of oversight - while dispensing taxpayer funds like some automated teller machine on quaaludes – and enrich themselves greatly by providing these fore-mentioned ‘basics of civilised existence’ – often in a less than satisfactory format, which even a passel of shit-wallowing hogs would raise complaints over having to live in.
The German lexicon has an appropriate, and most fitting, term for attempting to improve something, but ending up by making things a damn sight fucking worse: verschlimmbessern.
Now these carpet-bagger types have finally attracted the attentions of human rights and charity groups, and too government immigrant welfare regulatory officials; and the main offenders being duly named n shamed in the national gutter press tabloids.
Concerned whistleblowers, still possessed of a sense of civil duty, and a moral conscience, have leaked details of one of the worst offending cases, where our incompetence-ridden Home Office had contracted management of these refugee camps to Slumsprings Ready Homes, an Essex-based private company.
Albeit not quite as notorious as other Home Office-contracted rip-off outsourcers, such as Serco and G4S, Slumsprings has made £££ zillions from asylum housing over the past couple of decades.
A search of Company House records reveals that Slumsprings is owned and controlled by Graham Slum, an Essex-based ‘businessman’ (sic) who has a wide range of other ‘interests’, including debt collection services, the Happy Pikey caravan park chain, and is a major investment partner in providing ‘welfare services’ to several Siberian gulags, with Russian oligarch partner, Oleg Mobsaroubles.
Together with his brother Jeff, Mr Graham Slum controls the Slumsprings Group – owners of Slumsprings Ready Homes, the south coast-located Slum Bay Village, and the Midlands-based Stevie Slum’s Radio Cars; and holds voting shares in the Outer Hebrides Slumwater Beach Resort; owned by extended family member, the Glasgow-based Mrs Holly McSlum.
Housing provided for asylum seekers by the Slumsprings Group has repeatedly been found to be substandard, with leaking plumbing, rising – and falling - damp, broken fire alarms and electrical sockets, plus infestations of cockroaches, rats and mice – which has duly earned the Slum brothers a certain notoriety as – er – fittingly – ‘slum landlords’ - profiting off the misery of others less fortunate, by providing accommodation for refugees that is on a par with the inherent squalor of the Brazilian favela ghettos.
While the Slumsprings Group has raked in an excess of £4 million nicker over the last five years from Home Office and local council authority contracts, other ‘dodgy dealings’ controversies include undeclared tax disputes with HMRC, and a Slum family-owned caravan park accused of profiting from the plight of homeless folks.
Belief be suspended, but the Slumsprings / Home Office contracts clearly state, sans ambiguities, that the asylum seeker camps will be equipped with TVs, Wi-Fi, and sports equipment to keep people entertained, and information provided in several languages - plus anti-Covid masks and sanitisers available – along with language interpreters and security – the entire boast manifests as more at scent than substance.
Information gathered from residents reveals living conditions are grim on a Dickensian workhouse scale – with up fourteen refugees made to share rooms together, devoid of any sense of privacy and dignity – and with zero clothing being provided, residents are still wearing the same salt-encrusted sea spray soaked clothes they wore when crossing the Channel – unless fresh clothing can be pilfered from local village washing lines.
So too, many are having to share shoes – such as the Palestinian al-Kess-Emakk brothers, Liwat and Khara, formerly both ‘Saracen Scallies’ and members of Hamas’ 21st Ibn Himar Rock Chucker Brigade – who escaped the Gaza Strip for a ‘quiet life’ – and are now billeted at the post-Covid Hogsworth Hill quarantine centre in Derbyshire.
The brothers informed
charity workers that they had to either share the single pair of shoes and wear
one each, then hop around – otherwise, on alternate days, one wear the shoes
while the other went barefoot – or stayed in bed all day.
The asylum accommodation business model is quite the fundamental enterprise. Private companies such as Slumsprings, and a chain of money-grubbing government quangos, receive regular fees from the Home Office, then find the cheapest accommodation possible from local landlords and sub-contractors, with a bare minimum of management and maintenance, to maximise the cut they take - which results in thousands of refugees dumped in damp, squalid, rat and cockroach infested slum housing - or, even worse, billeted at one of the notorious Britannia Hotel chain's multi-storey shitholes.
Slumsprings may not have not received the same focused negative gutter press attention as the infamous outsourcers, Serco, Mears - or G4S – yet has been in the asylum housing business nigh on 20 years and holds a pretty abysmal track record - more accurately described as ‘appalling’.
In 2019 the Daily Shitraker news tabloid exposed how hundreds of refugees were crammed into hostels in Southall, London, accommodations overrun with vermin - cockroaches, rats and mice. These were all Slumsprings contracted hostels - but sans proper oversight due being managed through a ‘couldn’t care less’ sub-contractor aptly named Roachlets.co.uk.
None of these issues have stopped Graham Slum making good money from asylum housing, with accounts filed at Companies House revealing that Slumsprings Ready Homes Ltd – the full legal name of the company running the asylum contracts – was paid £68 million quid for its services in the year ending 31st January 2020.
The Slumsprings circus, and boss Graham Slum, have done well as asylum housing profiteers. But this isn’t just the story of a few greedy individuals, for Mr Slum is only one medium-sized player in a rotten asylum system which, at every level, puts outsourcers’ profits before the conditions of the people under its ‘care’ (sic).
Meanwhile, as the Home Office stumbles from one half-baked measure to the next, amplifying cack-handed government incompetence by dishing out further lucrative, money-spinning contracts to quangos with a documented records of gross incompetence; outsourcers such as Slumsprings Ready Homes, sans competent Home Office oversight, will keep banking their ‘money for old rope’ management fees.
https://corporatewatch.org/clearsprings/
Allergy warning: for readers suffering from HSS (Hypersensitive Snowflake Syndrome) – there is no known EpiPen medication remedy for adverse reactions to the 'politically incorrect' – aka the Truth.
This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane unorthodox irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour and caffeine-boosted public interest factoids with socio-political satire - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references, 5G electrosmog radiation, and a chemtrail residue of genetically-modified nano-particle bush telegraph innuendo.
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