Tuesday, 9 December 2014

Nut Rage SoKor Slut Delays Plane

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Arrogance’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Ms Hyun-Ah Cho , the Executive Vice President of Korean Air is under investigation following an incident of first class compartment 'air rage' in which she threw the statutes of the KA Handbook of In-flight Regulations to the four winds regarding etiquette and protocol when she vented her short fuse temper on a hapless flight attendant and the senior steward after being served with macadamia nuts in a bag on not the silver platter that she - being the airline owner's daughter - is accustomed to.

To put a cap on last Friday's contemptuous display of egocentric unqualified arrogance on the tarmac at New York's JFK Airport, Cho then went into total 'delusions of grandeur' mode and demanded the pilot abort take-off, turn around on the runway and return to the departure gate ramp to kick off the erring flight attendant - causing further delays and waking up a legion of moronic TSA goons and Homeland security thugs to a possible WTF? terrorist / hijacking incident.

Issuing a post-incident press statement to scandal-salivating media hacks in Seoul, Korean Air spokesperson Ms Sue Doku attempted to spin doctor the incident by claiming the plane was delayed for a mere eleven minutes, and the decision to sack and disembark senior flight attendant Sum Dum Fuk - with extreme prejudice - had been made in consultation with the pilot, Commander Flip Flop Fong, who wholly agreed with Ms Cho's decision to throw him off the plane - as he didn't want to further upset the egocentric psycho bitch by disagreeing with her and get his own arse fired in the bargain.

Canny first class passengers aboard Flight KE86 from New York's JFK to Incheon used their cell phones to record the hysterical Hyun-Ah Cho's tantrum elevating into full amok mode and screaming blue murder at the flight attendant - primarily for not asking her if she would like a pre-flight snack of decaffeinated macadamia nuts - and then for committing the egregious act of serving them in a paper bag rather than on a platter - and being too slow to apologise, kowtow and kiss her bony yellow ass.

Interviewed by a press hack from the Sociopaths Gazette on arrival at Incheon, first class passenger Mr Fuk Yew Tu confirmed that Cho spit the dummy and threw an industrial strength hissy fit.
"Even though the nasty bitch is a senior vice president of the airline, she was a passenger at that time and should have expected to be treated like shit, the same as all the other passengers, and not some royalty snob."

"Obviously the logical approach to this contrived 'problem' would have been to reprimand and fire the erring steward's arse 'when' the flight reached its destination - here in Korea - but Ms Melodrama Queen, with her typical hyper-sensitive menopausal dyke behaviour, played out her offended prima donna role to catch all the ego-boosting attention she could."
"Talk about abuse of position and authority, this slut's inappropriate bad behaviour has violated Aviation Safety Laws, which state that passengers should not cause disturbances, including using violent language or yelling. What she needs is a shot of high octane psychological counselling to correct her sociopath condition."

Hyun-Ah Cho (Anglicised to Heather) - who actually runs the company's hotel division and has sweet fuck all to do with the airline, per se - pompously declared to the 250 head shaking fellow travellers "I might well be a passenger on this flight to Incheon today but as of now I am wearing my airline's executive vice president coat and what I say goes."
Regardless of 'what coat' she might be wearing, the opinion of other passengers for her shameful outburst and delaying take off by 20 minutes was one that Ms Heather Cho is a right cunt - in cunt's clothing.

The eldest daughter of Korean Air Chairman Cho Yang-ho, the 40-year old Hyun-Ah is known to friends and associates alike as a right self-promoting skanger, stricken with chronic halitosis, who attended the prestigious Swiss, Geneva-based Slappers finishing school where an exaggerated sense of entitlement and abuse of privilege helped her graduate summa cum laude with twin degrees in Unqualified Arrogance 'and' Social Rudeness - plus being bestowed with the disparaging sobriquet of Mistress Dragon Lady for demanding the school's catering department be fired en mass for refusing to peel and de-seed her breakfast grapes.

While being the muff-munching spoiled brat scion of Korean Air Chairman Cho Yang-ho might have its advantages, this latest of the cross-dressing Hyun-Ah's cringeworthy, menopausal mood swings - on steroids - is definitely not going to impress her Daddy, a media shy conservative oligarch who decries the shameless excesses and scandalous antics of contemporary zillionaire Chaebol dynasty degenerates.

To wit, Heather Cho's head is so far up her own arse it's a wonder she can breathe.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Sunday, 7 December 2014

'Coverups Willie' Finally Exposed

In today’s ‘Enhanced Coverups’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in paedophile scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Met Plod Squad detectives running the multi-pronged Operation Kiddie Fiddler investigation have informed media hacks they are finally ready to arrest and charge a top cabinet rank Tory who ordered police to scrap an inquiry into a Westminster VIP politico sex abuse ring, circa 1980 - but have been hampered in their efforts as the suspect conveniently died back in 1999.

Twatcher Conservative government cabinet member, 'Wigwam Willie' Shitelaw, in his 1979 to 1983 capacity as Home Secretary, ordered senior Metropolitan Police officers to quash a year-long investigation into a gang of rabid royals and Parliamentary politicos accused of sexually abusing hundreds of children on 'lecher loan' from care homes in Liverpool to Wrexham to London, the youngest of whom was six.

This criminal intervention by Shitelaw, the halitosis-stricken deputy prime minister, occurred in 1980 following revelations in the Nonce Busters Gazette that police and prosecutors were considering 350 offences against a PIE-connected pederast gang for supplying politicians, prominent lawyers, film stars and BBC DJs with a steady stream of young boys to violate as bum fodder at the elite Barnes-based Elm Guest House Buggery Club and the equally noxious Portland Place, Dolphin Square and Cedra Court sodomite / snuff movie dens.

The report, published on July 7th 1980, revealed the Plod Squad had passed evidence to the Director of Public Prosecutions and that a bevy of household names, along with royal faces, MPs, Lords, TV personalities and singers, female impersonators etc, could face arrest and prosecution for sexual molestation and sodomy charge offences against underage boys.

Ron McScrote, the journalist who penned the expose, claims that within hours of it hitting the presses he was summoned by A10 police officers to an interview at their anti-corruption branch HQ at Tintagel House in Vauxhall and threatened with prosecution under the Official Secrets Act (probably another bogus D Notice waved in front of his face) - with further sinister implications that he could well fall victim to an assisted suicide and be found desanguinated, wrists slashed and propped up against a tree in the Grassy Knoll Woods - the same as his whistle-blower source - a serving Plod Squad officer with a moral conscience.

Hmmm, so Westminster VIP kiddie fiddling is actually classed as an 'interests of national security' official secret? Well, with the likes of the Royal Family and Downing Street cabinet members mutually implicated in a vile catamite buggery ring then it's not the type of scandal they want broadcasting to the common herd lest such incite a flash mob reaction and bloody revolution.

And that folks was Tory grandee Willie Shitelaw - aka the Nonce from Nairn (oh yes, another Scottish paedo) - who reigned as Tory Home Secretary from 1979 to 83 then handed the Coverups Portfolio on to his successor - none other than his Masonic brother at the Royal Alpha Lodge No. 16 - the notorious Paedo File shredding Leon 'Combover' Brittan.

For the record, both Shitehall and Brittan were alumni of Trinity College, Cambridge - infamous for its output of Red Mole Soviet spies and alcoholic homo-pederasts - and Shitelaw was as thick as thieves (sic) with his big pals Lord Georgie 'Curb Crawler' Wigg, Lord 'Bob the Blob' Boothby and the cross-dressing analist rake, Tom 'Cynthia' Driberg (aka Baron Badwell) - collectively a trio of raving bisexual fudgers cum pederasts - and all blackmailed to hell and back by the East End Kray Twin crime syndicate 'and' the KGB.

As to 'Lecherous Leon' Brittan, in his waste of time tenure as Home Secretary, a little birdie snitch claims that upon semi-recovering from the shock and awe trauma of reading the content of the mega-page 'Paedo File' compiled and submitted for action by Geoffrey Dickens MP (in which Brittan's name appeared) he sought out the counsel of none other than the sinister cross party political puppeteer / meddler and media gatekeeper, the corpulent and corrupt Baron Aby 'Two Dinners' Goodman, a habitué of the Dolphin Square depraved Bacchanalian kiddie fiddling orgies - yet another shirt-lifting Cambridge alumni with a taste for little boys and an embezzling shitbag to boot - who promptly advised 'losing' Dickens' damning dossier - and sooner more so than later.

To return to Wigwam Willie and further add to his ignominy, it was he who, in 1980, slammed the lid, at Twatcher's behest, on the public / media exposure of the incriminating evidence uncovered by the Leeds Plod Squad detectives of Jimmy Savile's venal connections to serial killer / rapist / necrophiliac Peter Sutcliffe, aka the Yorkshire Ripper.

Yet another sex scandal qualifying for a D Notice / Official Secrets Act gagging order? More vice and turpitude brushed under that soiled carpet we refer to as 'history'?

But behind closed doors 'Charlie Coverups' was Willie's disparaging sobriquet - and not just involving child sexual abuse and their ritual Satanic Black Mass blood sacrifice murders by his Masonic fraternity brothers - such as the venal catamite strangling Tory PM, Ted Heath.

To his eternal damnation and shame Willie conspired with the venal Vatican / Roman Catholic Church and Chief Constable Graham Shillington, head honcho of the Royal Ulster Constabulary, to cover up the involvement of Irish paedo-priest, Fr James Chesney, in the 1972 Claudy, Londonderry indiscriminate IRA bomb blast which killed nine innocent people, including a wee eight-year-old girl.

So let not appearances deceive - for to break tradition and speak ill of the dead - the bluff, genial, lovable Willie Shitelaw was, on reflection and in all truth, an utter dog wanker and proverbial cunt - an ardent royalist stooge who slithered into the Nasty Party political circle to serve their self interest agenda, in exchange for no more than the occasional 'good dog' pat on the head.

Thought for the day. Bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers - to get people refusing to accept or believe what the state-controlled gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format - and start using their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' and make that 'harm's way' quantum leap to begin thinking for 'themselves' and become agents of their own destiny.

Thus fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity, and Big Brother – and his Common Purpose sister – and the profit-motivated / money-grubbing Moloch / Mammon worshipping Agenda 21 architects of the Rothshite ZioNazi New World Order Globalisers - the Round Table dog wankers, and their Council on Foreign relations and Trilateral Commission pondscum pals who comprise the elitist ranks of the annual Didloberger cabal get-together.

Carbon Credit Offset / Cap & Trade Exchange (aka Global Warming / Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: No trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees or small furry mammals - otters or voles – or Syrian refugees - were harmed in posting this insurrectionist epistle. However, a large number of the GCHQ / Five Eyes Alliance’s Prism / Tempora / Carnivore / Echelon / X-Keyscore / SIG-INT I-Spy super snooper ‘Nosy Bastard’ wire-tap / IMSI catchers / eavesdropping / data mining system’s network electrons on Hubble Bubble Road in Cheltenham were temporarily inconvenienced.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Saturday, 6 December 2014

Pigswill Foods 'Pay n Stay' Scam Exposed

In this morning’s ‘Blackmail & Extortion’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

Pigswill Foods, one of Broken Britain's biggest grocery manufacturers, has been caught on the mooch and cadging mega-bucks up-front payouts off its suppliers for the dubious privilege of continuing to do business with the firm - otherwise risk being 'delisted'.

Interviewed by the BBC's Newshite 'Ripoff Hour' programme, one supplier claimed the practice - spoken of in whispers as 'pay and stay' (or 'fuck off') – equates as Blackmail –with a large capital B.
Ron McScrote, owner of McScrote's Silage, related that "They demanded I cough up £70,000 quid which is a fuckin' scam as far as I'm concerned an' bears the fetid stench of Nonceland's raving poufter Stuart King, James the First, flogging off monopolies ter pay fer his rent boys – only in this case it’s Pigswill Foods putting a price on the dubious privilege of supplying them with produce."

Conversely, Pigswill's chief executive Freddy Fagin, in a pathetic effort to counter McScrote's damning remarks, told Newshite: "We launched our 'invest for growth' policy last year as part of a broader initiative to boost our director's annual bonus payments - which included slashing the number of our suppliers from the dog and pony show one man outfits like McScrote's to companies who appreciate the value of a strategic partnership focused on mutual growth. Specifically they pay us and we designate them as most favoured supplier."

While Pigswill's Fagin says he's fairly confident the 'pay and stay' scam did not break any rules under competition law, the Newshite expose revealed details that the struggling company has received zillions of pounds from its suppliers in this way - a scandalous fact now being scrutinised by the government's geriatric Business Minister, Vince Cobbles and referred to the CMA watchdog.

The company ran into dire straits financially last year following their disastrous joint venture with Monsanto Mutant Meals to produce a genetically modified hybrid cross of a Tamworth pig with the recovered DNA of a Siberian mammoth to create the luncheon meat producing 'Spammoth' - a two ton porcine monster that was so tough to chew even their Pooch Chow and Bonedigger dog food line canine customers refused to eat it.

The company, which owns patent rights to a swathe of popular household brand names that include Mrs Shylock's Marzipan Matzo, Chico's Chunder Cakes, Scambrosia Puds n Custard, Pisto Gravy, Shitwood Sauces, Mr Kripling Pies, Biffo's Barf Burgers and Poxo, were hit with a series of crippling law suites in 2012 when their GMO 'Frankenfoods' Chew n Spew microwave insta-meal line - while being much sought after by anorexia sufferers and bulimics on Pigswill's vaunted Puke-a-Thon weight loss diet - were found to contain dangerous levels of carcinogenic plutonium and had to be withdrawn.

Ms Fellattia van der Gamm, director of the Federation of Small Businesses, opined to media hacks that "This blatant 'pay n stay - or else' demand on the part of Pigswill Foods is the type of strong arm 'gun point' tactics employed by Mafia gangsters and not what is to be expected from a UK food manufacturer."
"While their Fagin boss might well purport that they're not doing anything illegal under the statutes of the Groceries' Code, the entire scam is wholly immoral. It's a dishonest practice - on the surface and to the very core and these ‘profit over all’ motivated scumsters know it. What, we might ask, is going to come next? Pay up or we'll send the heavies round and break your legs?"

"If they are in financial difficulties viz the negative growth economic climate / adverse commercial forces, and through their own fault with the calamitous Spammoth project and their 'insta-tumour' radioactive Puke-a-Thon meals - then like these incompetent casino culture banksters and their overdrawn institutions – apply Darwin’s survival of the fittest maxim and let them go under – to be replaced by stronger., more stable institutions."

The BBC's Newshite programme did reveal that the government-appointed regulator, the Competition and Markets Authority, was suffering the negative, downside effects of Chancellor Osborne's 'austerity drive' and thus reluctant to commit resources to any investigation this side of Easter 2015 - as the costs would be a drain on their forthcoming Christmas party budget.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Friday, 5 December 2014

US / China Internet Censorship Scam

This morning’s ‘Enhanced Orwellian Censorship’ edition brings readers the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s ‘Inside the Great Wall’ Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

In a more scent than substance ‘hands across the seas’ diplomatic gesture, Barky Obama’s AIPAC-staffed State Department this week agreed to a ‘common areas of concern’ meeting in Washington DC with the tsar of the Middle Kingdom’s infamous Internet censorship program, where the cryptically titled Under Secretary for Economic Growth, Energy & the Environment signed an agreement of co-operation with the fire-spitting dragon troll who dishes out arbitrary prison sentences for online political activists that display the audacity to criticise China's corruption-ridden ruling Communist Party and the career kleptomaniacs manning the criminal enterprise bureaucracy.

Catherine ‘Smelly’ Novelli, the lard arsed incumbent Under Secretary jobsworth at the EGE&E - a former Muppet Show stand-in for Miss Piggy - joined Ms Sum Dum Fuk, Beijing’s Cyberspace Compliance Minister, at the China-U.S. Internet Industry Forum, which was attended by a pick n mix batch of 150 Western Zionist government client state officials and industry leaders representing the Rothshite crime syndicate’s Orwellian control freak interests.

Gutter media hack reports from the conference focused on the speech given by Dum Fuk, who advised US companies to respect China’s ‘might is right’ / ‘democracy denied’ status to enforce draconian Internet laws - or kiss any chance of profitable trade interaction bye-bye.

The repressive People’s Marxist Utopia of China government agents assigned to Ms Dum Fuk’s agency censor the Internet 24/7, and on a capricious whim cut off access to prevent ‘thorn in the side’ unpatriotic Qui Tam whistleblowers and Bolshie snitches from posting comments such as ‘Tuidang’ (Fuck the Party) or documented evidence of the overarching state corruption, and the cover ups of a litany of human rights abuses and atrocities committed by the Snakehead Triad infested government to maintain their ‘by the short and curlies’ stranglehold on the one and a half billion hapless peasant population.

The gospel according to Chinese émigré dissident Mr Fuk Yew Tu, writing in his daily Washington-based Totalitarians Gazette column, “On Sum Dum Fuk’s watch the Beijing government has blocked zillions of foreign websites and issued Kafkaesque regulations to restrict sharing on social media and increase the censorship of online video sites.”

“Ms Dum Fuk is, in the eyes of international jurists, held responsible for manipulating a decision handed down by the Supreme Court last year which ruled that web users who posted content critical of the state, which was subsequently slapped with a ‘false rumour’ label, were personally responsible for the post if it received over 50 shares and would be subject to hefty fines and jail time in Wanking Province’s ignominious Smiley Face Transplant Organ Donor Prison – notorious for inmates being released with a kidney missing.”

Ironically the current theme of internet dissent in China is focused on the controversial mandatory harvesting of transplant organs of executed prisoners to supply the mega-bucks black market donor trade – and to facilitate this end capital punishment sentences being handed down for such trivial criminal offences as double parking, shoplifting and non-payment of council tax.

Typical of the stereotype career stooges tasked to implement the edicts of repressive authoritarian states, Obama’s EGE&E shill, the porcine ‘Smelly’ Novelli, responded positively – as ordered - to Sum Dum Fuk’s call for US companies to accept China’s dystopian system of web censorship, by accepting Beijing’s crackdown on free speech and its barbaric treatment of government critics, and thus forge a ‘zero tolerance’ agreement between the two countries on cyberspace criticism issues – all in accordance with the good ole US of A’s plot to implement severe restrictions on web freedom domestically.

'Bathhouse Barky’ Obama's Israeli-Zionist puppet Washington administration, urged on by Kosher Nostra stooges such as uber-kikester ex-Senator Joe Lieberscumm, are juggling a scam to reclassify the web as ‘a utility’, bringing it under the ambiguities of Title II of the Telecommunications Act, thus greasing the skids for all-out FCC control and ready an ‘executive action’ kill switch option to shut down the Internet – specifically social networking sites, blogs and e-mail facilities under the auspices of national security when the next 9/11 style false flag terrorist attack takes place.

Thought for the day. Little wonder the White House cuckoo faggot / Muslim-Indonesian impostor Obama and his FEMA-fixated control freak administration are getting a hard on for China’s ‘Read This, Tremble and Obey’ internet compliance laws – with any and all who stand up to be counted and challenge their ‘unelected’ government’s unregulated abuse of official powers and all-round despotic tyranny copping a jail sentence at best – and a 9mm parabellum double tap as the worst case scenario – for such is a dictator’s wet dream come true.

Thus if the Great Satan are planning on a draconian censorship campaign to parallel China’s, then the gift of clairvoyance and a crystal ball aren’t required to scry the fact that the UK will be next to legislate some lese majeste law criminalising any critical comment directed at the government / royalty / PTB – and most specifically ‘Testosterone Terry’ May’s foot-dragging Home Office non-event currently referred to as the stalled Independent Panel Inquiry into Child Sexual Abuse: an investigation of historic child sexual abuse by untouchable ranking Parliamentarians, rabid royals and BBC celebrity paedo' DJs.

So bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and get the mainland Chinese to follow Hong Kong’s stellar example and use their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' and make that 'harm's way' quantum leap and start thinking for 'themselves'.
No longer accepting and believing what Beijing’s gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format – that the control freak Politburo holds the solution to all their problems (wrong – they are the fucking problem).

To wit, fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity that holds sway in China as much as it does elsewhere on our misruled pale blue dot – all to the benefit of the few and the detriment of the many.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Wednesday, 3 December 2014

Polak Politico Slams Tory Benefits Block

In this morning’s 'Pikey Scroungers Exposed' edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

One pissed off Polish 'Civil Platform' Party politico with a vowel-deficient surname yesterday threw a hissy fit while citing Brussels EUSSR member state rules and regulations, informing the media he will single-handedly block a bid by Broken Britain's Prime Minister, Posh Dave Scameron, to slash welfare benefits paid to slack arsed, unemployed pikey migrants.

Rafal Trzaskowski - a former child TV star (sic) whose degree in Animal Husbandry from the University of Natolin forms the core basis of his political acumen and experience - informed gutter press hacks at the Scrounging Gits Gazette that discrimination on grounds of nationality is an absolute no-no and the Polish Parliament will be working flat out to stymie the British government's plans to implement any such drastic action that might result in droves of mooching Polak ne'er do-wells saying "fuck this place" and jumping on the first bus back to crappy Cracow when their welfare benefit streams are cut off and the doors close for good at their local UK Polski Shopski outlets.

Deputy foreign minister Trzaskowski (and recently appointed Sec of State for Europe) claims the plans to exclude benefit tourist migrants from claiming Jobseekers Allowance and Non-Working / Absent Child Tax Credits for the first four years after they arrive in the UK - in addition to hoofing out those who fail to find work after six months - would go against the spirit of the EUSSR mandated 'share the wealth' policy and insisted Poland would oppose the proposal.

Getting carried away with his own flawed rhetoric and verbosity, Trzaskowski told BBC Newshite: ''If Mr Scameron and his Nasty Party Tories want to block the hallowed welfare benefits that are enshrined in the EUSSR charter and treat poverty stricken immigrants from Poland differently - simply due the fact we cannot afford to fork out such extravagant 'money for old rope' perks here - and intend to only pay benefits after four years then it will be his own fault for the rise in sham marriages and incidence of unqualified tradesmen posing as plumbers and electricians and decorators by our Polish citizens - and as a direct consequence all his royal ducks and swans and carp go missing from London's parks and ponds to feed starving migrants."

Meanwhile, treating Trzaskowski's semi-veiled threats as more at scent than substance, the arrogant Scameron confided to the Tory zillionaire contingent of the Downing Street cabinet that he's more than ready to take Broken Britain out of the European Union if the corrupt Brussels bureaucrats refuse to agree to his terms regarding tough proposals to pare down the immigration statistics of scrounging gyppo and pikey benefit tourists jumping on the welfare gravy train bandwagon and turning up at Thiefrow or Dover with no more than the arse in their pants and employment skill sets limited to pick pocketing and pimping.

Nice one Dave. Fuck the pledged 'referendum' - just cut loose right now - immediately if not sooner - and bollocks to the corruption-ridden bonkers Brussels bureaucracy (kleptocracy). Let's return to being an insular island state. Piss the environmental pillaging frackers right off and get those coal mines open and operating again. Same with our heavy industries that Maggie Twatcher neutered and by consequence exchanged Britain's 'Great' prefix with that of 'Broken'.
Next on the agenda, all the moronic (daft / intrusive) EUSSR Stalinist rules and regulations - shitcan the lot and let's get back to the business of being a superior manufacturing / trading nation.

And while we're at it, repatriate all military troops currently deployed overseas and engaged in illegal wars of aggression against Mid-East sovereign states - and tell the Great Satan and the ZioNazi state of Israel to kiss our arse as we aren't playing their barbaric games any more.

Then fuck the Rothshite crime syndicate right off, nationalise the banks and start printing our own debt-free currency - and issue arrest warrants for the war criminal likes of Tony Bliar and a gaggle more who okayed the 7/7 false flag terrorist attack - and go for the murderers of Dr David Kelly and Jill Dando - and let the honest contingents of the national Plod Squad loose to enter Parliament - the Houses of Conmans and Lords - 'and' Nonceland's Holyrood - 'and' the parasite paradise known as Fuckingham Palace - to arrest the so-far 'untouchable' Masonic fraternity kiddie fiddling / snuff deviant scum that child sexual molestation victims have identified as their sodomite abusers.

Hmmm, that should do for starters - plus ditching the reviled 'austerity programme' and the bedroom tax, and restore all disabled benefits - then get down to firing the Downing Street cabinet deadwood and career tossers such as Georgie 'Mr Bean' Osborne, Willy Vague and Iain Dunkin Shit - and the fulfilment of such might just get the 'Less Nasty' Party Tories re-elected - with a majority - come next May.

So much for daydreams and 'what could be'.

Thought for the day. Bollocks with a large capital B to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and get people using their eyes and ears - and brains - to say 'what if?' and make that 'harm's way' quantum leap to start thinking for 'themselves' and become agents of their own destiny.
No longer accepting and believing what the gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format - or the totalitarian EUSSR Federation control freak state being the solution to all our problems (wrong - it is the fucking problem) and the 28 nation European community contributes to our dysfunctional multi-cultural society.

Thus fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity, and Big Brother – and his Common Purpose sister – and the Moloch / Mammon worshipping Agenda 21 architects of the ZioNazi New World Order.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Tuesday, 2 December 2014

Foreign Office Recruits Dickhead

In this morning’s ‘Professional Incompetence Pays Off’ limited press run edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with whistleblower's leaked dispatches hot off the Met Plod Squad's 'snitch line' expertly hand forged, wrought and crafted into bespoke, cutting edge satire to tempt the palates of all conspiracy theorists, budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The Met's Assistant Commissioner, Cressida 'Seven Shots' Dickhead, 69, Broken Britain's highest ranking female Plod Squad officer, is to finally do the 'right thing' - quit the service (and move to the Foreign Office?) after more than thirty years of racking up a record number of floundered, stitch-up investigations and glaring fubars - and an assortment of other train wreck disasters she's presided over - then gone into her customary 'culpability denial' mode and blamed some other hapless fucker for her mistakes - as per the bodged 2008 arrest of Tory MP Damian Green.

The aptly-named Dickhead, easily recognisable by her piggy-eyed squint and trademark spiky butch dyke coiffeur - the type of Amazon wannabe skanger who inspires people to count their fingers if unfortunate enough to have shaken her hand - has apparently thrown a hissy fit and spit the proverbial dummy following her recent exclusion from a key SO15 counter-terrorism department role on the grounds she's a 'class act fuckup' who can't be trusted - and will leave in her shameless wake a veritable snail trail history of gross incompetence and Biblical scale calamities which have rightly earned her the disparaging sobriquet of The Snafu Kid - (one up on her Thames Valley Sappho Squad moniker of 'Strapon Sally').

The personality-deficient Tory Foreign Minister, Philip 'Dandruff' Hammond, cornered by canny gutter press hacks outside a Barnes Common public toilet where he was spotted 'cottaging' during his lunch hour, quoted the Official Secrets Act and refused to be photographed alongside a loitering rent boy, nor reveal the role the meddlesome Ms Dickhead will take up when she assumes her lateral promotion post at the Foreign Office on 19th January.
Conversely insider moles have leaked reliable gossip that the ghastly woman will be undertaking tasks more suited to her Common Purpose-trained intellectual skills - such as making coffee, running errands, pushing the mail trolley round the office and emptying Hammond's trash can - as penance for her past sins and brazen hubris.

To the public mind, we would collectively prefer never to have heard of this arrogant troll, nor the Nth degree catastrophic fuck up that threw her, Miss 'Untouchable' Gold Command, and the equally unaccountable gung-ho trigger happy SO19 Specialist Firearms Unit, into the media limelight with the bungled fatal shooting (murder) of innocent Brazilian electrician, Jean Charles de Menezes - a mestizo Roman Catholic Christian - mistaken by the moronic plods for Hussain Osman, a velcro-headed Ethiopian Muslim suicide bomber - and shot in the skull seven times at point blank range while boarding a train at Stockwell Tube Station.

Hence Miss 'Don't Blame Me' Dickhead was the designated Gold Command officer and wholly responsible for Operation Kratos - the Met's codename for special tactics to 'deal with' (murder / silence) false flag terrorist patsies such as the Leeds Muslim crew recruited by MI5 to work for Peter Power's Visor Consultants on a 'terrorist attack drill' and who were too stupid to see the wood for the fucking trees - and get on the right train - 'and' blow themselves up as planned, 'and' got shot all to fuck and back in an SO19 ambush when they - in their naive innocence - turned up at Canary Wharf later that fatal 7/7/2005 morning to find out what all the commotion was about.

The Met's head honcho, Sir Scouse Hulk Hogan Howitzer, doing his best to say something nice viz Dickhead's surprise departure, told media hacks she was a 'role model'. Nice one, Scouse - but a role model for what exactly- morons in general or the entire 'blame denial' culture that affects our not fit for purpose police service?

As far as we, the voting public demographic, are concerned "Whoops!" is no excuse or real apology for having an innocent migrant electrician subjected to an extra-judicial killing under the questionable legality of the 'Kratos' option - while wholly ignoring the historic criterion of 'innocent until proven guilty'.

So if Cressie 'Halitosis' Dickhead maintains the fallacy that she was not responsible for Menezes getting mega-tapped with a seven count of 9mm parabellum Black Talon rounds and remains unaccountable for her Gold Command responsibility actions, then who the fuck was to blame for the biggest policing scandal of July 2005? MI5 or MI6 for initiating this joint Mossad false flag Jolly Jihad terrorist attack in the first instance, simply to generate a wave of Islamophobia and demonise the Muslim sectors of our multi-cultural society and justify further wars of aggression in the Greater Middle East to attain strategic geo-political advantage and seize control of some other fucker's oil resources?

Hence as a stream of porky pies were told under sworn oath at the Menezes inquest to cover up their collective blundering mistakes and no fucker or their dog is to blame, then that sets a precedent for the tossers to do it again - and again - which leaves us contemplating who's gonna be next on the fuckwit's agenda to get double tapped x7 by mistake (or sinister design to make sure Menezes never revealed what he was privy to viz the 7/7 false flag attacks).

Thought for the day. Can't decide what presents the more favourable option - getting shot in the back of the head like Menezes - or an assisted 'wrist slashed' suicide like Dr David Kelly - or induced fatal heart attack like Robin Cook - or suffocate while padlocked inside a big black North Face holdall - a la GCHQ spy Gareth Williams?

OMG! Who is gonna be next on the security service's agenda to cop the nasty double tap? Hopefully one of these rip-off Polack plumbers or builders or window cleaners - as since Ms Dickhead okayed the murder of the Brazilian you just can't find decent electricians around the Stockwell area anymore.

Due the venal curse of the Masonic brotherhood pondscum infesting all aspects of the First, Second and Third Estates, our once-sceptred isle no longer has a Montesquieu system of institutional checks and balances acting to enforce the separation of government powers: the judiciary, legislature and executive.
Hence we have a corrupt establishment (royalty / Parliament - Houses of Conmans & Lords / civil service / courts / police / social services / banks / big business) that assumes the role of inquisitor into their own wrong-doings - scrutinising, probing and reviewing themselves - which equates as PC Fox charged with custody of the hen run keys, then tasked with investigating the case of the missing chickens.

So bollocks to political correctness - from here on in this is our legacy - to rip away the Veil of Venus blinkers and get people using their eyes and ears - and brains - to make that 'harm's way' quantum leap and start thinking for 'themselves'. No longer accepting and believing what the gutter press and biased goggle box telly spew out in politically correct format - or as 'hate thy Muslim neighbour' black propaganda - simply to pursue some unlawful self-serving immoral agenda, to maintain and further the established Them n Us compliance / control freak status quo.

Thus fuck the Satanist Masonic secret handshake pederast-necrophiliac fraternity, and Big Brother – and his Common Purpose sister – and the Moloch / Mammon worshipping Agenda 21 architects of the ZioNazi New World Order.

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Carbon Credit Offset / Cap & Trade Exchange (aka Global Warming / Pollution Reduction Scam) declaration: No trees, fish, cormorants, bumble bees or small furry mammals - otters or voles – or Brazilian electricians - were harmed in posting this insurrectionist epistle. However, a large number of the GCHQ / Five Eyes Alliance’s Prism / Tempora / Carnivore / Echelon / X-Keyscore / SIG-INT I-Spy super snooper ‘Nosy Bastard’ wire-tap / IMSI catchers / eavesdropping / data mining system’s network electrons on Hubble Bubble Road in Cheltenham were temporarily inconvenienced.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

Monday, 1 December 2014

Black Friday UK: Virtual War Zone

Once again, the latest and the greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The gospel according to Shylock Shekelberg's editorial in this weekend's copy of the Money Grubbers Gazette, Black Friday was the busiest day on record for online retailer Scamazon UK with orders exceeding 5.5 million items over the 24 hour period - approximately 64 pieces of junk flogged off per second - and mega-profits besides, they're still paying the hapless zero-hours contract workers (sweatshop slaves) the bare minimum wage.

Lucky for Scamazon all business orders were transacted via the internet and they avoided the mindless stampedes of delinquent Christmas bargain hunters that materialised at the stroke of midnight, described by many as a zombie invasion, and terrified the likes of hardened retail store sales assistants in High Street branches and shopping malls across the length and breadth of our once (pre-fracked) green and pleasant land when the hordes descended alike a Biblical plague of locusts - consuming all in sight that glinted under the fluorescent lights and bore a discount price tag.

Plod Squads were roused from their regular night shift Irish power nap siestas on a national scale and forced to leave the panopticon CCTV screens, get off their idle arses and actually put in a personal appearance at stores all over Broken Britain, to quell alarming crowd surges as bargain-focused predators, hell bent on a spend-a-thon 'shop or bust' session, hunted for the best Black Friday buys.

Greater Manchester Plods appealed for calm - without effect - after attending seven Pestco Greedy Grocer outlets at which three senior citizen Grandma types were arrested for running amok and causing an affray in the knitted goods department, plus one woman hospitalised with concussion after being struck with a stale Swiss roll at the franchise's Wythenshawe / Stench Hill 'Extra' branch during an altercation involving 'first served' possession of a '25% off' Lady Shave bikini line depilator.

Brummystan Police, opting for a craven 'discretion being the better part of valour' approach to facing off frenzied shoppers with a 'do or die' look in their eyes, summoned riot squads in full body armour, backed up by water cannons and SO19 Armed Response officers kitted out with CS gas and baton rounds to quell the in-store disturbance at the Bullring Shopping Centre when irate Paki youths crucified the manager of Topshop to the trunk of the complex's Christmas tree with nail guns looted from the adjacent Screwfix DIY store - for allegedly ripping them off on the advertised price of black balaclavas with the ISIS Jihad insignia.

To add to the national scale mayhem and chaos, a fight broke out when 200 shoppers refused to leave a store in Middleton despite being informed all the stock had been sold, and proceeded to rip up the floor tiles, counters, wall panels, desks and light fittings to placate their sense of unfulfilled purchase disappointment.

Felix Fagin, director of the Smegmadale-based Wilkins Micawber Institute of Economics, speaking to one gutter press hack from the finance industry's Repo Weekly, opined that "UK shoppers squandered around £518 zillion quid online with their 'plastic fantastic' credit cards, which will most definitely materialise as a Black Friday when they get the bill in the New Year and have the Tonton Macoutes from the Renta-Thug bailiff agency coming round knocking on their doors."

"But of course this is simply a carbon copy of what our shit for brains colonial cousins get up to in the good ole US of A - paying homage to Mammon, the all-consuming god of greed and materialism - and lining the pockets of the Edomite Mafia - those avaricious Rothshite Kosher Nostra banksters - especially with Black Friday being a bonanza for the lowlife likes of the payday loan outfits - with veritable legions of punters gracing the portals of Ripoff Readies, Gash Cash Loans, Slick-Quid and Crap-Credit to borrow the money to buy all kinds of shite they don't need - nor can afford - and end up paying it back at ludicrous interest rates that make the term 'usury' a euphemistic joke."
"But that's what this Crapitalist financial system is all about - fractional reserve banking and debt slavery as the route to social control and hence maintain a political stranglehold on society."

Meanwhile, up in bonny Nonceland, the Plod Squad were summoned twice to a branch of Home Base in Glasgow just after midnight, when concerns were raised by scarified staff over customer conduct inside the store - with one crowd engaged in a rugby style scrum-down to gain possession of a stack of discounted microwave ovens - while a second gang of social misfits descended on the gardening department and proceeded to 'field test' the weed burner flame throwers, setting fire to the patio furniture section in the process.

Sir Peter Fahy, Chief Constable of Greater Manchester Police, took time off from not investigating child sexual abuse reports involving fellow Freemasons to express frustration via his Twitter account, relating that the issues were totally predictable - far beyond any semblance of anti-social behaviour breaches.

Fahy claimed he was personally most disappointed by the non-performance of shop security at a swathe of Pestco Greedy Grocer stores where the not fit for purpose bully boy security guards contracted from the Renta-Moron Agency stood around and did sweet fuck all as the howling mob tore the place - and each other - to pieces in what manifested nationally as a Black Friday disaster which has left tens of thousands of bargain hunting shoppers injured, plus scores more missing and feared dead.

British armed forces 22 SAS Sergeant Ron 'Pitbull' McGasher, on leave from his tour of duty in Islamic jihadi terrorist-infested Turdistan, was at one of the stores participating in Black Friday in Liverpool to pick up a frozen pizza and six pack of Old Headbanger lager as mid-night struck and a wave of brain dead Scousers fought to get a grip on anything shiny.
"People woz bitin' each other, pinchin', punchin' an' kickin' - it was fuckin' horrendous wiv the twats climbin' over shelves an' displays, staff runnin' fer cover an' screamin' their effin' heads off - fights breakin' out, stock flying through the air, scrotes an' scallies nickin' tellys - an' that woz before the effin'' sale had even started."

"Personally I got ter admit I damn near shit meself - it woz worse than havin' the bleedin' Taliban snipers firin' at yer arse down one of them choke hold valley's in Afghanistan's Bellend Province - or gettin' yer head sawn off by that ISIS Beatles bloke, Jihadi John."

Thought for the day. With regard to this debtocracy-based Crapitalist monetary system, where collateral-free payday loans and extended credit are up for grabs to any fucker and their dog, there manifests a situation that has just got to bring out the worst base attributes of human nature.

Alas, the rumour of this 'great cosmic awakening' besides, there exists a confounding glitch in the perceptions of mass human consciousness that derails their understanding of what the fuck is actually going on in the world and works to their collective detriment. But as 99% of humanity operates according to the dictates of its stomach and sex organs, what the fuck can we expect.

As Will Rogers once so prudently observed: "the thing about 'common sense' is the fact it ain't too common".

Allergy warning: This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with wild rumour 'and' hard public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a news sheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby, committed to the relay of open source information – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.