Yep, the banner
headline encapsulates the essence of the message – with Labour’s current Energy
Secretary, ‘Ego Ed’ Millipede, single-handedly formulating a future housing
crisis that will have legions of hapless property renters rendered homeless,
and out on the streets - dossing across the expanse of Food Bank Britain’s back
alleys and public parks.
Hark, and
listen to the budding housing crisis message being carried on the winds of
change, in the wake of Labour’s annual party conference – a week-long, gobshite
‘blame the Tories’ name-calling / cross party back-stabbing session in
Scouseland.
Sooner than
keep his stupid mouth shut and not publicly expose a glaring IQ-deficiency,
Ed Millipede, the younger brother of the equally obnoxious David Millipede –
and progeny of that chronically repulsive Belgian-born Polack-Marxist political
wheeler-dealing Commie – and pro-Zionist sympathiser - Adolphe Millipede –
simply had to take the stage, and make his moronic presence felt.
Babbling on regardless, ‘Wallace’ Millipede did succeed in impressing all
assembled that, without a doubt - and regardless of his official ministerial
title - he knows sweet fuck all regarding ‘Energy Security – or ‘Net Zero’ -
nor has one single point of cerebral acumen regarding residential housing
construction or insulation technology – apart from the A4 sized photo-copied
information downloaded from the property pages of the Beano and Dandy kid’s
comics - or Builder’s Weekly - and shoved on the desk in front of him to peruse
and quote from – by Labour’s cognisant energy department staffers, burdened to
support the hopeless moron in fulfilling his ministerial daily duties.
Okay, now read
on, viz what ‘Wallace’ intends to inflict on property landlords –
and ban them from renting out homes that are not up to the Labour / Millipede
standard of energy efficiency.
Really, for
this is not simply some political parody piece to ridicule Labour’s choice of
an ‘energy minister’ for the fun of it – but rather fashioned from whole cloth
truth, to report, in the public interest, that the moronic Millipede has
actually vowed to ban landlords from renting out properties that do not meet
his more at scent than substance ‘energy efficiency standards’.
'Red Ed' further informed the Labour party conference at ‘Grim-up-North’s Liverpool that
property investors would have until the end of the decade to ‘dig deep’ into
their collective pockets – or take out mega-interest bank loans (if available -
and they qualify) - to invest (sic) £10,000 quid on upgrades for each of their
rented social homes.
Under Mr 'Smarty Pants' Millipede’s iron fist aegis, private housing landlords will be henceforth
forbidden from renting out properties with an energy rating of E, or lower – (G
to Z) - while official figures from 2022 indicate that 50% of rental properties
have an EPC rating of at least C.
Thus Millipede is vowing to ensure every single rented social housing
property reaches his mandated standard of energy efficiency by 2030, sparking
fresh fears that Labour intends to declare war on private landlords – forcing
them to invest unaffordable amounts on heat pumps – or (no laughing) solar
panels – (in the cloud-stricken northern hemisphere island of Britain?) - to
achieve their ‘Millipede-approved’ energy performance certificate (EPC)
rating of C, or higher.
(For the
benefit of the uninformed, EPCs rate homes on their energy efficiency, with
properties graded between A and G – and the government’s initial consultation
suggesting that all newly-rented homes to have a minimum rating of C by 2025,
and then all rented properties by 2030).
Regardless of
homeless folks and families in dire need of having a roof over their heads, and
glad to rough it – even if it’s a tent, a parkland bivouac, or even a vacated pigsty - current rules
forbid landlords from renting out properties with a rating of E or lower -
while there is no minimum rating for rented social homes.
Conversely, the
National Residential Landlords Association warned that almost a third of Broken
Britain’s rental homes were built prior to 1919 and heated by coal fires, thus would be among the hardest to improve the energy efficiency of.
To close his Labour party conference speech, Millipede speculated – on
record - that banning landlords from renting out energy inefficient homes would
lift one million families out of fuel poverty – and having to live in cold, draughty homes – which he
personally points his fickle finger of Fate at – blaming such as a Tory legacy,
a Tory scandal – and a Tory outrage.
Que? WTF? Who
the fuck put this clown - ‘Wallace sans Gromit' - Millipede in charge of anything that involves
intelligence, let alone appointed to the post of the Labour party’s energy
secretary, overseeing the proposed energy and ‘nutty’ net zero compliance
across the entire swathe of Broken Britain?
Has any fucker
thought the scale and implications of this one through – as ‘Wallace’ Millipede
and his faithful dog Gromit, obviously have not.
Ergo,
reflecting on the above sentence, let us simply advance to the point where
hard-up landlords will back off borrowing mega-bucks from rapacious,
mega-interest rate banks, to pay for the mandated ‘Millipede Upgrades’ – and
properties will stand empty – plus no longer forking out monthly council tax
payments – and the homeless shall flood the streets, back alleyways, and parks.
Lol’s - albeit
it is not a laughing matter, and to compound insult to injury, the Labour party’s
shit-fer-brains - and noxious - Chancellor, Rachel 'Cold Comfort' Thieves, is now planning a capital
gains tax raid in October’s Budget – a factor that has convinced many landlords
to sell up and get out of the property market – while this egregious Labour
government are in office.
How
these Labour party clowns, of Millipede’s ilk, draw legitimacy for the
absurdities that form the foundation points of their socio-economic – and net
zero policies - is a question lacking a coherent answer.
Fer
fuck’s sake, now the latest project of this shit fer brains Labour government
is to introduce a ‘Protect the Undead’ bill before the House of Conmans - to
enact a ban on the sale of, or possession of, zombie knives.
Now
no fucker or their dog is gonna be safe when these decomposing ghouls escape
their churchyard graves – or leg-it, half-incinerated – from the crematorium’s furnace,
or corpse cinder dump – and cause havoc on the night-time landscape of Broken
Britain – eating stray cats, badgers, and hedgehogs – and the vulnerable legions
of Labour-inflicted homeless folks, crashed out on park benches, or in tents
under parkland trees – deprived of the very tool that might combat the zombie
hordes.
Labour,
two months in office, and while Broken Britain morphs into Food Bank status as
the Autmn sets in - with no £300 quid winter fuel allowance payment cash to
spare for our OAPs - but plenty of £££ in the slush fund to send mega-bucks armaments
to the Ukraine, or for welcoming ashore, housing, and feeding, legions of
illegal migrants in hotels - then donate another £2 billion nicker- of our
taxpayer funds - to some more myth than substance ‘climate change assessment
fund’.
Something
stinks in Denmark - and it isn't Hamlet's socks.
https://bmmagazine.co.uk/news/landlords-face-ban-on-renting-energy-inefficient-homes-under-labours-new-policy/
https://www.thetimes.com/uk/politics/article/landlords-face-ban-on-renting-homes-that-are-not-energy-efficient-lpqc0bj0f
Allergy
warning: for readers suffering from HSS (Hypersensitive Snowflake Syndrome) –
there is no known EpiPen medication remedy for adverse reactions to the
'politically incorrect' – aka the Truth.
This article was composed in a known
propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane unorthodox
irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of
wild rumour and caffeine-boosted public interest factoids, plus a dusting of
socio-political satire - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest
porkies, misaligned references, 5G electro-smog radiation, and a chemtrail
residue of genetically-modified nano-particle bush telegraph innuendo.
