Broken Britain's incumbent Tory Nasty Party’s poor choice of a Cabinet Environment Secretary, Therese Coffey, a fat slug with the IQ of a lesser spotted gastropod, stirred up a fresh row this week in the House of Conmans when she claimed the common herd whingers complaining about inflation and food bills should 'work extra hours' – obviously including the unemployed and disabled sectors of our sick society in her arrogant, broad brush statement.
The androgynous Coffey, a Scouse halfwit notorious for her gaffe-prone comments and opinions, was branded 'appalling' for her 'shocking' sentiments by one Labour MP as they clashed across the floor of the Conmans debating chamber.
Ergo, and there you have it. Follow in the septic footsteps of the talentless Coffey, connive your way into an MP’s job at £84,144 nicker per annum – plus generous expenses – then into a Cabinet ministerial role, for a round robin salary figure of £156,000 quid – then you can tell the common herd to get their finger out, give up their precious ‘at home with family’ quality time, and work a shitload of extra hours to avoid malnutrition.
Really, the unqualified arrogance of this bitch, who could scoff two more taters than shit-wallowing pig in a gluttony contest. We pity the troll’s Suffolk Coastal constituents.
This current tongue-lashing ruckus is the latest in a series of controversies to hit the Environment Minister, who has been rightly dubbed 'Calamity Coffey' by her burgeoning legion of critics.
Alas, in a moment of foolish impulse, the dumpy Coffey Beast was not only appointed Health Secretary by her ‘up close n confidential’ brainless baggage buddy, Liz Truss, last year - in her fatal couple of weeks as the Tory’s ‘Fearless Leader’ – a sojourn marked by major policy fuckups – but also to the unrequited post of Deputy Crime Minister.
On that ridiculous occasion, the maths-deficient Kwazi Warthog was appointed Chancellor of the Exchequer and subsequently crashed the value of the £ pound Sterling - and Coffey admitted she was 'no role model' for the health secretary post after being challenged viz her grossly overweight appearance, indolent lifestyle, and enthusiasm for booze and cigars.
During environment questions in the House of Conmans yesterday, Coffey was quizzed by Labour's York Central MP, Rachael Maskell, viz the common herd voters and taxpayers struggling to afford food shopping – with Coffey shifting the blame for food poverty onto a low wages and unskilled jobs criterion – suggesting that people work even more hours – and harder - to put food on the table – thus confirming beyond all shadow of doubt that the government is utterly out of touch with the lives of its working class voters.
To add further insult to injury, the moronic Coffey came up with the bright idea that the hungry public demographic should eat turnips instead of thinking about lettuce and tomatoes and other fruit and vegetables amid supermarket shortages resulting from the current vacuous stock n trade excuses – war in the Ukraine and ice age weather conditions sweeping across north Africa– and while zero mention was made of potatoes, swedes, parsnips, cabbages, leeks, onions etcetera, et al - all UK home-grown produce - Coffey’s emphasis remained focused on a singular diet of boiled turnips.
So that’s Coffey - the poor man’s Marie Antoinette: ‘The poor have no bread? – then let them eat turnips’
Precisely what Coffey should be on – a Spartan diet of raw neeps to get her weight down to a manageable half ton.
Hmm, perhaps we’d be better off with dietary advice from celebrity scarecrow, Worzel Gummidge.
To close, Coffey was recently booed at the National Farmers' Union conference after she insisted UK egg shortages were not being caused by market and supply chain failures – but lazy chickens with a bad attitude, not laying their mandated weekly quotas of eggs.
Allergy warning: for readers suffering from HSS (Hypersensitive Snowflake Syndrome) – there is no known EpiPen medication remedy for adverse reactions to the 'politically incorrect' – aka the Truth.
This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane unorthodox irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour and caffeine-boosted public interest factoids with socio-political satire - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references, 5G electrosmog radiation, and a chemtrail residue of genetically-modified nano-particle bush telegraph innuendo.
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