Sunday, 27 June 2021

Skewed News Roundup

Bermondsey stabbing: Man killed at illegal rave.

Que? WTF? Once upon a time – and not that fucking long ago – the proviso for an open invite to a party was simply 'bring a bottle'. When did it morph into 'bring a knife'?

A man has been stabbed to death at an illegal rave - close to Millwall FC's south Bermondsey ground - after voicing complaint the performing rapper artist was 'shite'.

The Met Plod Squad found the victim at an unlicensed music event in an industrial unit just before midnight on Saturday.

A 16-year-old male was also found at the scene with head injuries and arrested in connection with the rave.

The teen was taken to a hospital with 'a condition' (pissed drunk n stoned) not believed to be life-threatening.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-57628294

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Classified MoD documents containing details of the Royal Navy's HMS Defenceless type 45 destroyer - along with top secret British military operations and plans - have been found at a bus stop in Kent.

The papers discuss likely Russian reactions to the ship's passage through Ukrainian waters of the Black Sea, off the Crimea coast, last Wednesday – and detailed plans for a possible UK military presence in Afghanistan to guard and oversee the safe harvest of opium crops once the US-led CIA / NATO drug-running operation is terminated and the Taliban assume control again.

The document bundle, in excess of 50 pages, and acquired as a cosy nest by hedgehogs, were discovered behind a bus stop in Kent (I-Spy dead letter box?) on Tuesday morning by a Russian holidaymaker (who wishes to remain anonymous) waiting for his coach ride with Novichok Tours for a scheduled  trip to Salisbury.

Investigating MI5 officers believe the documents – composed of maps, emails and Microslop PowerPoint presentations, are from the office of a senior official at the MoD – specifically Minister of Defence, 'Bumbling Ben' Wallace.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-57624942

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Shitehall Offices Bugged with CCTV Cams

In the wake of the Tory Nasty Party's Ill-Health Secretary, Matt Wancock, being caught on camera, engaging in carnal foreplay with his 'bit on the side' assistant Gina Coladangelo – in the supposed private confines of his ministerial office - the Freemasonic ranks of Whitehall's sodomite-ridden Civil Service are currently shitting kittens that they too might have been snapped in similar lascivious circumstances – while playing the beast with two backs / buggering the resident office catamite / tea boy.

Post-event, with arch-twat Wancock being hoist on his own hypocrisy-tipped petard, the DoH is planning to investigate how CCTV footage from the Minister's private office - of him breaking Covid social distancing rules - by bonking his taxpayer-funded assistant during working hours - was leaked by some low life disgruntled Shitehall whistle-blower to the gutter press Daily Shitraker tabloid – who apparently was of an opinion the CCTV video footage 'deserved a wider, 'public' viewing audience.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-57628523

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