Wednesday, 6 May 2020

'Lockdown' Ferguson Fired for Non-Essential Sex


The blatant hypocrisy of Food Bank Britain's totalitarian regime officialdom hits fresh embarrassing heights this week after Imperial College's aptly-named 'Professor Lockdown' - Nutty Neil Ferguson – (now notorious for his fatally-flawed Covid-19 virus pandemic Biblical scale 'Dreaded Lurgy' death toll predictions) - has been forced to resign his Scientific Advisory Guesswork for Emergencies (Sage) government consultancy role in the wake of media exposure the twat was delinquent in breaking his very own 'stay home' rules - to engage in immoral cuckolding sessions by organising 'take-away sex' visits from his 38-year-old married woman 'shag on the side' Mrs Brenda McSlagg – while her own husband was bed-ridden, recovering from coronavirus symptoms and unable to 'get it up'.

In her own defence McSlagg told one gutter press hack from the Daily Shitraker that the repeated visits to Ferguson's home did not fall under the non-essential journey category as her jackrabbit personal vibrator had overheated and quit working due excessive lockdown boredom use - and she was suffering anxiety attacks and experiencing bouts of suicidal thoughts due her mounting sexual frustration.

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