Third World KSA Shithole Start Tourist Drive

Once again we bring our readers the latest and greatest 'hot gossip' in this scandal-mongering counter-culture Enhanced Bullshit’ exposé edition from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with 'ring of the anvil' dispatches hand forged, crafted and tempered into razor-edged bespoke satire; to sate the palates of all budding anti-authoritarian non-conformists, proto-nihilists and those eclectic career radical, pro-justice revolutionaries who carry the immortal genetic Rh-Neg recusant bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial - and harbour zero respect or empathy for the privilege-abusing arrogant authoritarian 0:01% elitist oligarchy who imprudently believe they rule this world and all upon its mantle.

The backward and barbaric Kingdom of Saudi Arabia looks set to kick start an enthusiastic socio-political Great Leap Forward and breach the dogmatic religious boundaries of Wahhabism and shift the current Dark Ages 1441 Islamic date a few centuries forward, and eventually coincide with the rest of the world's 21st Century 'civilized' way of 'doing things'.

This radical – and too largely controversial move - to open its parochial and xenophobic doors to international non-believer and 'Christian infidel' tourists - is central to incumbent psycho Crown Prince Mohammed bin Thug's liberal economic reform 'wish list' programme – which aims primarily to attempt a rebrand of its barbaric image amid criticism of its deplorable human rights record - (only surpassed by Hitler, Stalin and Pol Pot) – plus the recent crackdown on women's rights activists – and 2018 murder of exiled Saudi journalist and critic Jamal Khashoggi.

From the balance of payments aspect, income from bin Salman's ambitious (read 'delusional') 'One Million' tourist visits per annum target is aimed at reducing the kingdom's dependence on the sales of oil, sand and camel shit compost to generate the required cash to buy high-tech weaponry from the Great Satan and Isra-Hell – and so continue to bombard the crap out of Yemen – and finance the likes of proxy war front ISIS and Shite Helmet Sunni & Cher terrorist cells.

On Friday, the kingdom will launch an innovative visa regime for 49 countries and relax strict dress codes for female visitors - to wear spandex burkas - moves the Tourism Minister, Sheikh Well Before Using, described as a historic moment for the ultra-conservative country. 
Speaking to one gutter press hack from the Doom n Gloom Review the Sheikh speculated "We already have women drivers, so whatever next we might ask - freedom of speech?"

Visas have until now largely been restricted to pilgrims visiting Islam's holy city of Mecca - (re-sited after Muhammad ditched Petra as the Muslim world's Holy of Holies following the destruction of Abraham's original Ka'ba and moved Adam's guardian 'black rock' there) – along with mega-bucks investors (with more money than fucking sense), Third World expatriate slaves working for an exploitive pittance – and Western three hole whores - willing to flog their gollies to wealthy Saudi blokes - in exchange for a couple of hours limitless retail therapy in Aladdin's Cave.

Gee n Wow – lotsa stuff on the bucket list to check off. Never seen an adulterous wench stoned to death – or some hapless shoplifter's hand chopped off – or a live beheading – (gotta be better than all those faked ISIS videos – cutting some poor twats bonce off with an Argos kitchen knife – and never - ever - seen an ex-pat journalist strangled then chopped to bits with a bone saw while the strains of 'Staying Alive' boom out on the stereo - then any body parts not suitable for sale on the dark web's black market transplant organ site fed to a pack of dogs.

Allergy warning: for readers suffering from HSS (Hypersensitive Snowflake Syndrome) – there is no known EpiPen medication remedy for adverse reactions to the 'politically incorrect'.

This article was composed in a known propaganda-infested area - and whilst purposely blending high octane orthodox irreverence, slanderous allegations and unbridled conjecture with measures of wild rumour and caffeine-boosted public interest factoids - may also contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and a chemtrail residue of genetically-modified bush telegraph innuendo.

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