Saturday 6 August 2011

EU Scrotes Can Claim UK Pensions

In this morning’s ‘Enhanced Bullshit’ edition we bring you the latest and greatest in scandal-mongering hot gossip from Anarchy Central’s 24/7 Truth & Rumour Mill – with dispatches hand forged and crafted into bespoke satire to tempt the palates of all budding nihilists and career revolutionaries who carry the immortal bloodline of the rebel sons of Belial.

The EUSSR Commission have finally crossed the Rubicon and burned the bridge behind them - and hopefully committed the fatal faux pas that will galvanise the British proletariat into getting off their complacent and apathetic arses and giving our oick of a Prime Minister, Posh Dave Scameron, a righteous kick up his privileged arse to ‘demand’ he live up to his broken promise of holding an EUSSR membership referendum.
Nor are we going to settle for a replay of the Irish version either, wherein every time they voted ‘NO!’ they held another one until every fucker and their dog got so pissed off they eventually voted ‘Yes’ and said “Fuck it!”

In a typical display of unqualified arrogance and customary Brussels intrusiveness, the EuroTwats are now demanding that British civil service bureaucrats manning the Borders Agency call a halt to requiring pikey migrants from the other 26 community nations to prove they have no need to petition our fucked up social security system for a handout.

As UK law stands, people wishing to settle in Britain must demonstrate that they have the means to support themselves, either through work or an alternative source of income such as the time-honoured professions of flogging pirate DVDs and smuggled baccy around the pubs, or dealing drugs or running an underage brothel for paedos. However, the European Commission claims that this requirement amounts to discrimination against citizens of the EUSSR community, who Brussels, in their infinite moronic stupidity, have ordained to possess the same rights as British nationals. (Er, what are those?)

Conversely, the EuroTwats have totally disregarded their own crafted Article 7 of the Free Movement Directive, which allows EUSSR citizens the right to reside in another member state but only if they have sufficient resources to support themselves and their family members – and do not become a burden on the welfare benefits system of the host state.

Earlier this year the High Court ruled on the claim of a Latvian pensioner, Mrs Scroungella Trollenberg, who moved to Britain and had ‘demanded’ Pension Credit on grounds that her Latvian pension was so small she couldn’t even afford to feed her poxy dog, let alone herself and toyboy Boris.
Although our courts seem to have a bad habit of ruling in favour of immigrants, the law here is so clear-cut that the judges, in their infinite wisdom, told her to go and get fucked.

However, if the morons at the European Commission are to get their way, then Granny Trollenberg would not only be able to claim lots of Pension Credit but also council tax and housing benefit – regardless of never having paid a single ‘lat or santimi’ into our social welfare system.

So, to get round this primary ruling, the shifty European Commission is resorting to a display of Machiavellian sophistry, arguing that if immigrants were sanctioned to top up their income from the UK’s over-stretched welfare benefit scheme then they’d have sufficient resources to reside here.

Hmmm, who the fuck’s conjuring this shit up in Brussels’ ‘Ministry of What Can We Fuck With Next’ - Wiley T Coyote working in tandem with Humpty Dumpty – or have they got a crew of baboons grafting away 24/7 on the project?

Hence this intriguing flimflam ruling is set to open the floodgates of migration and we’ll have every sponging fucker and their dog – swan-roasting pikeys and unemployed Polish plumber wannabees cluttering up the Jobcentres and DSS offices with their grubby little mendicant hands out – while Brits in need can’t get a look in.

Thought for the day: Okay, enough of taking the piss by this kleptocratic crime syndicate in Brussels, it’s time to squeeze Posh Dave Scameron bollocks and ‘demand’ our promised EUSSR membership referendum.

Oh, and by the way, fuck the Maastricht Treaty, and the EUSSR Constitution, and the Treaty of Lisbon – and the worthless Euro – and Brussels and the New World Order.

Allergy warning: This article was written in a known propaganda-infested area and may contain traces of slight exaggeration, modest porkies, misaligned references and lashings of bush telegraph innuendo.

Rusty’s Skewed News Views (Purveyors of Bespoke Satire) - enhanced with a modest touch of Yeast Logic and a piquant dash of Political Incorrectness: a newsheet and media source not owned by Rupert Murdoch and the Masonic Zionist kikester lobby – and immune from litigation under the statutes of the ‘Fair Comment in the Public Interest’ defence.

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